by K. G. Reuss
“We can watch whatever you want,” she said, munching away. “I’d love to see your favorite movie.”
I rubbed my thumb along the remote for a moment before I turned it on and kicked off my shoes, loosened my tie, and tossed my blazer in a chair. It slid off and landed in a navy puddle on the floor but fuck it. She let out a soft giggle, the sound making my heart race.
A moment later, the opening credits of Die Hard popped on the screen. I cast her a glance out of the corner of my eye to see how she’d react to it. I was met with a vision of her blue eyes locked on the TV and her mouth full of popcorn as she watched, totally engrossed.
Satisfied she wasn’t going to be one of those girls who bitched about an action flick, I contemplated moving back to the dresser but then glanced at her again and noted she didn’t have her apple juice. Some fucked up part of my mind wanted her to have it, so I got up to grab a beer for me and her juice. She peeked up at me as I handed her the juice.
“Thanks.” A tiny, sweet smile lifted her plump lips up as she took it from me. “You can sit next to me. We can share the popcorn.”
I stared down at all the buttery goodness as my guts rumbled softly again.
Hell with it. It was just popcorn and a movie.
I flopped down beside her and grabbed a fistful to stuff in my mouth, my eyes on the TV, but my body acutely aware of her how close she was to me as she sipped her juice. Aware of how her body heated mine. Of her lavender scent. Mindful of the way she shifted a little closer to me.
Fucking stop, Levin. She’s the enemy. Can’t be trusted. Don’t get your dick in a twist just because she looks all sweet and innocent beside you. D’Angelou. She’s a D’Angelou.
I grabbed more popcorn and chewed furiously as my boy Bruce came on the screen. My hand brushed against hers when I went back in for more. She paused for a moment as I instinctively brushed her fingers again.
Shit, what am I doing?
I yanked my hand back, empty, slurping down my beer and crunching the can before tossing it into the trash can from my bed.
“Nice shot,” she said, sitting up.
A smile teased my lips as she tried to hit the basket with a piece of popcorn.
“It works better when you’re buzzed,” I said.
She whipped her head around and stared at me. “I’ve only been high once. You were there, remember?”
“I try not to,” I muttered, my smile slipping away as I reached over and opened the drawer of my bedside table and pulled out a joint. That was the night she’d met up with her mystery guy and let him fuck her. It wasn’t a thought I wanted in my head.
“Why? You got a night off from watching me.” She settled deeper into my pillows.
“Watch the movie,” I grunted, lighting the joint and taking a deep hit, relishing the burn in my chest and the fuzzies that slipped through my body like warm liquid.
“You never talk to me.”
“I don’t have anything to say.” Another hit. Fuck, that’s good shit.
“I don’t know anything about you, Levin.”
“I thought we were going to watch a movie.” I kept my eyes on the screen.
“Yeah, but we’re alone and everything. We can still talk.”
I got up to get my six pack and brought it to my nightstand. Sighing, I sank back into my spot beside her, joint still in hand.
“Where are you from?”
I hit pause on the movie. Fuck. We were doing this.
“Germany. We came here when I was five.”
“Do you speak German?”
“Ja,” I answered. “We speak it in my home. Or at least we used to until my mom died.”
“I’m so sorry,” she said, staring at me with her brows crinkled. “What happened?”
I took a hit from the joint and cracked open another beer. I wasn’t sober enough for this shit. “My old man had her killed. Or he killed her. Who the fuck knows.”
Her eyes widened in horror. “Your dad. . . murdered your mom?”
I nodded, an ache in my chest as I blew out the smoke. “My brother, Stefan, was murdered too. It’s just me and my old man now.”
“Levin, I-I’m so sorry.”
“Don’t be. It’s not your shit.” I took a swig of my beer.
“It doesn’t matter if it’s mine or not. It’s still horrible.”
“It is what it is,” I muttered, deciding fuck it. I’d overshare. “My mom is the one who kept us sane. Dad’s a fucking maniac. Works for Dom’s dad, Matteo De Santis. An enforcer like Vincent’s old man. They do the dirty work so Matteo doesn’t have to get his hands too messy. Dad was hardly around when I was growing up. He was always working.” I snorted. “When he was around, he was teaching us fucked up shit, like how to kill a man and hide evidence. Stefan was good at it. Too fucking good. Pops took notice. Stefan became his favorite. Ivy League schools. Fancy cars. He doted on him. But my brother…” I shook my head. “He knew what was up. He didn’t want this life even though Pops wanted it for him. Stefan wanted to run his own business. Loved computers and designing games and shit. Went off to college and got caught up in some bad stuff.”
Bianca remained frozen the entire time I spoke. I licked my lips. I’d only ever had Dom and Vincent to talk to, and God knew I didn’t waste a lot of time talking about my personal issues. “Heroin. I didn’t know he was using. Apparently, he was though because he turned up dead in a fucking alley behind Dom’s dad’s club on 57th and Park. A bullet hole in his forehead. Toxicology came back positive for drugs. We buried him next to Mama a week later. People said he had a girlfriend. Never found out who she was though. Everyone went fucking silent about that shit. She ducked out, and no one ever heard from her again. What a fucking joke.” I took another hit, my body buzzing from the high I was on.
“That’s awful, Levin. I really am sorry.”
I grunted and drank more.
“My dad is gone,” she said softly after a moment of silence. “I thought coming here I’d be able to figure out where he went. I thought someone would know something. They said he owed some gambling debts to Dom’s dad—”
“What was your old man’s name?” I took a deep drink from my beer.
“Nathan Walker. He was an accountant.”
I shook my head. “Never heard of him. Trust me, I would’ve too since me and the guys are who Matteo sends out to rough up people who owe money. In fact, pretty sure that’s what Vincent and Dom are doing right now.”
She grimaced at my words.
“Do you guys. . . kill people?”
“Sometimes,” I grunted. “Just how shit goes.”
“You’re so young—”
“Youth doesn’t determine the ability to take a life. I was twelve when I killed my first person. A man. Didn’t even know his name or what he’d done. My father took me and Stefan down to the docks. He made Stefan shoot one guy and me the other. Said it would build character.” I swallowed hard at the memory of the man on his knees, weeping. “He begged me. A grown ass man begged a twelve-year-old for his life. And you know what I did?” I locked gazes with her.
She shook her head, her lips parted.
“I pulled the trigger.”
She flinched as I made a finger gun and pulled the imaginary trigger as I aimed it at her forehead.
“I had to shoot him twice. First shot hit his shoulder because I was so fucking scared. It was either kill him or get my ass kicked. I knew which I’d prefer.”
I froze as she reached out and squeezed my hand.
“I’m sorry, Levin.”
I stared back at her, hating that she kept apologizing to me for shit she had no control over. “Don’t say my name like that.”
“Like what?”
I squeezed her hand back. “Like you can fucking save me. You can’t, bumblebee. Don’t even try.”
“Bumblebee?” She cocked her head at me, her brows crinkled.
“I don’t know. Dom calls you a wasp. But I think of you more like a bumbl
ebee, spreading your shit around. It’s whatever. I’m drunk and high. They have cutesy fucking names for you. Figured I should have one too.”
Her lips quirked into a tiny smile. “I don’t have one for you.”
“You don’t need one.”
She slid closer to me and twined her fingers through mine. “Levin… Hmm… love monkey?”
“The fuck. . .”
She laughed. “Mm, no? How about. . .Sugar Puss?”
I shook my head at her.
“Boo Bear?”
“Don’t you ever call me that.”
“Boo Bear. I like it.” She snuggled closer to me and rested her head on my shoulder, her hand still clutching mine. “You’re just a big, old teddy bear, aren’t you?”
I swallowed hard and stared down at our interlocked fingers. Quietly, I said the shit that had been on my mind all night, “You’re sad.”
She was quiet for a moment before answering. “Isn’t everyone?”
“Not like you. Did your lover boy break it off with you?”
Silence greeted me before she shifted closer, her free hand resting on my abdomen as she snuggled against me. I focused on keeping my breathing even at her nearness.
“Yeah. It wasn’t going to work out. It wasn’t a surprise. It just hurt.” Her words tapered off into a soft whisper.
I grunted. I hated the happiness building within me at the idea of that shit going to hell.
“Want some?” I held out the remainder of the joint, not knowing what the hell else to say to her to make her feel better. The reality of it was, she was better off.
She hesitated for a moment. “Promise you won’t lose me this time?”
I studied her for a moment before nodding. “Yeah. Promise.”
She took the joint and sucked in her hit, all the beauty in the fucking world at my side.
I was definitely too fucking high for this shit.
Thirty-Five
Bianca
“You ever get, like, so tired of the games?” I stared up at Levin’s ceiling, him lying at my side, both of us high off our asses.
The night had turned out better than I’d anticipated. When I’d first heard I’d be stuck with him all night, I’d figured it would only make my bad mood worse. Knowing Fallon and I were over before we’d even got the chance to start had hurt me. I really liked him. And the sex. . . oh my God. Now, I was back to square one, only this time, feeling lonely and needing to feel something besides the ache of it.
“I don’t know,” Levin mumbled. “I win all the games, so it doesn’t matter to me.”
I propped up on my elbow and peered down at him. He dragged his hazy eyes from the ceiling and stared up at me.
“You don’t win all the games.”
“I win enough. The ones that matter.”
“Why play the ones that don’t?”
“Why not? Either I’m torturing and killing people or I’m a player in a game. Seems like the game is infinitely more enjoyable than ending a life.”
“So you don’t like killing people?”
He snorted. “I love killing people. It’s who I am, but I do get bored on occasion.”
“And that’s when you play games.” I sighed. “Am I just a game to the kings?”
“Yes.”
My heart fell. I already knew what I was. It didn’t change the stupid feelings I had though.
“I’m going to lose, huh?”
In a stunning move, he reached out and cradled my face. My heart banged hard as I couldn’t stop myself from nuzzling against his warm touch. Levin never did these things. I wanted to think he’d touched me because he cared, but with as much as he’d drunk and smoked, it was probably his high making the move. I didn’t stop him though, and that screamed volumes about me.
“Of course, you are,” he said gently. “But it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t play.”
“You know I actually like you guys, right?” I whispered.
He shifted and moved onto his elbow so he was staring into my eyes. “Yeah, we know.”
“I don’t want to die, Levin. I want to find out why my dad left. Help him if I can. I want to marry someone I love. I want to feel good again, be happy.” I searched his face, hoping to find an inkling of anything from him. Maybe I was looking for hope. Or the answer to when it would all end. Or hell, begin.
“I can’t make promises to you, bumblebee,” he said, his brows crinkling as he ran his knuckles along my cheek. “I can’t say I won’t kill you but know I’ll probably feel bad about it if it happens. I don’t know anything about your old man. Because of the probability of me ending your life, I don’t see marriage in your future. But. . .” He trailed the pad of his thumb along my bottom lip. “I can make you feel good if you want.”
I let out a shaky breath as I stared into his blue depths. “You said you’d never touch me unless it was to kill me.”
“Consider this torture then,” he murmured.
I didn’t expect him to lean forward and press his warm lips to mine, but that was exactly what he did. Immediately, my lips parted for him, tasting him for the first time. His tongue slid out and tangled with mine as he deepened the kiss, his fingers knotted in my hair as he drew me closer.
I pressed against him, my heart racing as butterflies did kick flips in my guts. With every ounce of bravery I had, I pushed him onto his back, our lips not separating, and straddled him. I didn’t know if he’d toss me off when he came to his senses or if he’d claim what I knew was his. His hands moved to my waist where he tightened his hold on me, encouraging the rocking motion I’d started against the massive bulge in his pants. My questions were answered as I ground against his hard length, moaning softly as he pushed up against the perfect spot between my legs.
I moved shamelessly against him, my breathing growing heavier as we continued to tangle our tongues.
When the heat swept through my body, I let out a gasp. Sensing my impending release, he thrust harder, making waves of euphoria crash around me. I clung to him as I rode out the pleasure.
“Feel good?” he asked, breathlessly.
I nodded, breathing hard.
“Then fucking do it again.”
I did as he said, not wanting to miss a moment of whatever time we had. I was already sensitive, but knowing I had Levin Seeley hard beneath me made me eager to see what else we could do. With fumbling hands, I undid his pants.
His hands shot out and gripped my wrists, stopping me. I stared back at him, wondering what the hell I’d done wrong.
“I’m not going to fuck you, bumblebee.”
I swallowed.
“But we can have some fun,” he husked out. “If you’re good with that.”
I nodded, more than good with that.
He lifted up and shimmied out of his pants for me, leaving his cock bare and hot against my damp panties.
His hands shifted beneath my skirt and tugged at the silk. The sound of ripping urged me to rub harder against him. Within moments, he dropped the tattered silk on the floor.
“Fuck, you’re wet,” he grunted between kisses as I slid along his length, desperate to have him inside me.
“For you,” I managed to gasp out as the buttons from my top scattered across the floor.
He’d torn my top and shoved it off my shoulders, leaving me in nothing but my white lace bra and short skirt.
I slid along his length faster, the heat building as I raced toward another release.
“Come for me, bumblebee,” he called out as fire took hold.
I came hard and fast on his length. I’d gotten off twice just rubbing against him. I couldn’t imagine the highs he could take me to if I got him inside me.
Sitting up with me still trembling and straddling his lap, he kissed my lips before trailing scorching kisses down my neck and to my collarbone. My breath hitched as he placed a gentle kiss on the ugly burn mark before moving back to my neck and sucking against the sensitive skin. Moments later, his lips kissed a path to my
breasts where he nuzzled my cleavage.
“I want to fuck these,” he growled, nipping at the tops of my breasts just enough to make me wince and gasp.
“So do it,” I answered back.
His response was to flip me onto my back. Swiftly, he dragged my skirt completely off before removing my bra as he straddled my midsection, his thick cock in the valley between my breasts.
“Hold them for me,” he commanded, giving his length a long stroke.
I whimpered as he reached between my legs and rubbed my sensitive pussy, gathering my wetness so he could stroke it along his cock, a dark glint in his eyes.
I already knew I should fear Levin Seeley, but seeing the way he looked at me in that moment made me realize how dangerous he really was. He wasn’t just a killer. He was the sort of guy who’d take a heart like mine and shred it. And I’d let him because he was something really fucking beautiful to me. Death. Destruction. Desperation. Yeah, Levin Seeley owned me. It had just taken me that long to truly realize it.
I held my breasts for him as he pushed through them, letting out a soft groan as he did it. With one hand, he reached forward and fisted my hair. He wasn’t gentle about it, but I wasn’t foolish enough to think he was gentle in bed.
“Open your mouth,” he said, thrusting between my breasts again.
I did as I was told, the head of his cock kissing my lips with every thrust.
“Tongue out. Taste me,” his voice was a low growl as he continued his onslaught.
My tongue darted out, licking and sucking his head as much as I could with his strokes.
“Fuck,” he groaned, moving faster between my breasts and against my tongue. “I’m going to come all over that pretty face.”
My pulse thundered in my ears at his proclamation. He was breathless, fucking my breasts and mouth, his fist so tight in my hair it made my eyes water.
His movements were powerful, making me wince as he slid back and forth. I’d be bruised tomorrow because of how rough with me he was.
“Look at me,” he commanded in his deep voice, his eyes wild. “Look at who the fuck you belong to.”