When you feel able, carefully set aside the smudge stick on a rock or something nonflammable. Then breathe in deeply to a count of four—in and out, in and out—four times.
With your next inhale, send your breath to a specific part of your body that hurts and when you exhale, imagine your breath carrying the pain from you (ex: the night Bridget guided me through this exercise I had a terrible grief headache, so my first inhale went to my head).
Then, aloud, ask for help from whatever is causing you grief. It can be as simple as saying, “Please help me to stop being so sad that you’re gone that I can’t go on with my life.” Or as complex as Kevin’s request of Aphrodite: “I feel like I lost myself when you died, and I can’t find myself again without you … If you could help I’d appreciate it. This pain is so bad, Aphrodite. Mind-numbing and soul-sucking. But I’m afraid to let it go because if I do, I’m afraid that means I’m letting you go too. And if I had my choice, I would never, ever let you go … Please, help me. Please.”
And finally—the most magical part—expect a response! When I did this exercise, my grief was caused by months of injury and loss, culminating in the very unexpected, sudden death of my warrior canine, Badger. He collapsed in front of me and died in minutes—which was more than I thought my already battered heart could bear. When I asked for a sign, what I was gifted with, later that night, was the sound of him barking outside my door—so clearly, so loudly, that I actually rushed outside calling his name. He was there, of course, but only in spirit.
After your cleansing and releasing exercise, be sure you nourish yourself. Have a healthy meal, soak in a soothing tub—whatever helps you ground. And remember, no one is ever really gone. We are all joined by spirit and, if you open yourself, love … always love.
Know that this exercise is not meant as a solution to grief, depression, and/or anger. It is simply a first step. The rest of the journey to healing is up to you. Remember—you are strong, brave, and worthy of love. I believe in you.
*Bridget Pilloud can be reached via her website, www.PetsAreTalking.com
Fan Q&A
You have questions? P. C. & Kristin have answers for you!
Do you have any news on the movie/TV series? We’ve been waiting FOREVER! Is it ever going to happen? (Too many of you asked this question for me to attribute it to one or a few readers, so let’s say this one is from everyone!)
P. C.: We’ve been waiting forever, too! Which makes us very, very happy to be able to tell you that our producers, Davis Films, have teamed up with Academy Award–winning producer Don Carmody and International Emmy-nominated producer David Cormican through their DCTV to adapt House of Night to a live-action television series! Kristin and I are absolutely 100 percent behind this adaptation. We adore the team and are confident that they will respect our books while bringing our beloved characters alive on the TV screen. Stay tuned for more announcements soon!
What was the first book you read that put you on the path to being an author, and when did you first start putting together the House of Night stories?
—Rachel Ann Miller
P. C.: When I was thirteen years old I discovered Anne McCaffrey’s brilliant series, the Dragonriders of Pern. It was the first time I understood that a female could write and star in a fantasy / science fiction series. I told myself right then that I was going to be an author and populate my worlds with strong women.
In 2005 Meredith Bernstein, who was then my agent, and I were having dinner at a Romance Writers of America national convention and she said she would love for me to write a series “set at a vampyre finishing school.” I was teaching high school at the time, and my mind immediately went to YA. The rest is history …
When you’re writing, do you and Kristin still have the same level of excitement for these characters in the HoN Other World series compared to when you two first started writing the House of Night series? Has your love for these characters changed over the years?
—Jennifer Smith
P. C.: I’ll always love the HoN universe. Writing in it feels like coming home. I adore the characters, and because they started so young and so immature it’s still exciting to help them grow and evolve. My love for them has changed over the years—just like your love changes for friends and family. I’ve grown closer to some, like Kevin in both of his incarnations, and some just fade out of the story and the HoN life, like Drew or Venus.
K. C.: My love for the HoN world grows with each novel because my writing and editorial skills improve with each. It’s like playing a sport—it becomes more and more fun as I hone my skills. Plus, in the Other World novels, it’s so exciting to see how different some of my favorite characters are from the original HoN books.
What was one of the most surprising things you learned in creating the House of Night world? What about the Other World?
—Bri’ann Piguet
P. C.: In both worlds I have been surprised about how many real-life events creep into the fictional worlds. Some are planned—like highlighting the hypocrisy of the Bible Belt and the type of people who attend church constantly and carry around their Bibles but are the first to judge and condemn anyone who doesn’t look, act, or believe as they do. But often real-world themes that I do not plan to insert into the fictional HoN world become mirrored through the attitudes of my characters and the events that happen to them, like what happened between Aphrodite and her mother. I didn’t plan for her mother to play such a significant role in Lost but the level of racism, entitlement, and toxicity that I was, and still am, seeing in too many upper-middle-class white women informed the characters and the plot. When that happens, I think of it as a very special kind of magick.
What draws you to writing about vampires? Are you a vampire yourself because you really have all the ins and outs figured out of this amazing society? And which character are you most like?
—Lee Ryder
P. C.: That’s a good question! I was never drawn to writing about vampires. I was drawn to writing about teenagers and the issues they deal with on a daily basis. The House of Night is simply a vehicle to tell a larger story—one that highlights the struggles and joys young people face daily. I don’t think of the characters as vampires. I think of them as real kids (and adults), and then I put those “real” people in a paranormal setting.
I could be a vampire! I write at night and rarely wake up before noon. When I’m near deadline I usually go to bed about the time the sun is rising. But I’m a vegan, so that blood stuff is not for me.
There are pieces of me in many of the characters. The easiest character for me to write is Aphrodite. I feel a huge affinity with Lenobia—and she has several of my horses. I’m also very close to Grandma Redbird, though she is wiser than I.
I know that Neferet had bad influences in her life that led her down the wrong roads. We know that she was power hungry. Was there ever a chance in either book that she could have turned out good, like Aphrodite, if she’d had friends like the Nerd Herd?
—Denise Hapner
P. C.: That’s an interesting question and really the basis of the Other World. If you’ve just finished Forgotten, you’ll already understand that because Other Neferet’s past differed from our Neferet’s past she is different. I rely a lot on the nurture versus nature belief when I write the Other World characters.
With every character developed and their lives evolving or devolving in both series, did either of you consider the duality of Stevie Rae’s complex experiences and life and have her revert to the mind-set of the original red vampire? Where in the process did Rephaim become the choice (perfect choice BTW) to be her soul mate?
—Michelle Landron
P. C.: Aphrodite’s sacrifice enabled Stevie Rae, and the rest of the red vamps and fledglings in her world, to regain their humanity. Then it was just a matter of choice, and Stevie Rae (along with Stark) clearly chose love over h
ate—Light over Darkness. She will not revert because of that choice, and neither will Stark. Some characters won’t be as firm in their choice, which is why we could see others reverting—and have seen it.
I love the Rephaim question! His relationship with Stevie Rae was a total surprise to me! I planned that Stark would fall in love with Stevie Rae! Obviously, Stark had another plan—which happens frequently with my characters. I did not know that they were going to be a thing until the moment in Tempted when he speaks to her, and the humanity in his voice won’t let her kill him. Had I known that they were going to fall in love I wouldn’t have made Raven Mockers so hideous! You’ll notice as you read through Tempted and beyond that I stop describing Rephaim, except for his voice and his hands, because he is a hideous beast! Sheesh. Talk about making my writing life difficult!
K. C.: Since I edit and brainstorm as opposed to write any books in the HoN series, this is one of the character development aspects that I leave to P. C., because she can see into Stevie Rae’s future. Stevie Rae lives in P. C.’s head (as weird as that might sound) and she connects with her in a way that I’ll never be able to.
Grandma Redbird is such a constant balance within the chaos, is she modeled after someone in particular?
—Stacey Dhom
P. C.: Grandma Redbird is modeled after and inspired by the third face of the Goddess, the Crone. She is a blessing to write.
Did you already know at the conclusion of the first series that Aphrodite would be a vampyre again? What gave you the idea to make her both blue and red?
—Logan Kiner
P. C.: No! I only knew that Aphrodite would be a being like none other. At the end of the original series she was a Prophetess of Nyx—not entirely human, but also definitely not a vampyre.
Aphrodite gave me the idea for her dual tattoos when she pulled herself out of her downward spiral and chose to give herself another chance. When she did that—I realized the full extent of who she was, and that’s when Nyx gifted her with her unique tattoo and new power.
Did you originally intend for Kalona to turn good? Or was he supposed to just be a bad guy that the Nerd Herd defeats and that was that? I’ve always been fascinated by Kalona even after he “died.”
—Rachael Hillis
P. C.: From his very first scene I intended to redeem him and have him reunite with Nyx, but I had no clue how it was going to happen. I only knew he would have to work hard to earn his Goddess’s forgiveness, which he did. He is one of my all-time favorite characters, and I have loved revisiting him in the form of Other Kalona.
Did you intend for Aphrodite to be such a huge influence in the beginning of it all? She’s such a dear character now. Do you ever have any second guesses whether you guys made the right decision on her mark? (I love her so much!)
—Heaven Leigh Wallace
P. C.: I always intended that Aphrodite’s character would grow and evolve and end up being very tight with Zoey and the rest of the Nerd Herd. You can see that as early as the last scene she’s in with Z at the end of Marked. No, I’ve never second-guessed my decision to take away her Mark, and then to gift her with one that is unique to the HoN world. I love her exactly as she is.
Would you ever change Grandma Redbird to vampire as she can’t live forever?
—Kilah Gooding
P. C.: Grandma Redbird won’t be a vampyre, but I can promise you that I have figured out a way for her to live forever! I couldn’t bear it if anything happened to her.
Zoey’s birth father is never mentioned … Will he be brought up or end up being someone powerful?
—Cynthia Hobbs
P. C.: Absolutely not. Zoey’s birth father abandoned his children when he and his wife divorced. He isn’t powerful. He’s a deadbeat dad and completely irrelevant in Z’s life and in the HoN world.
Have you ever regretted a plot point in any story? Have you looked at a character and felt sad about where they have ended up?
—Carrina North
P. C.: No, I don’t regret plot points, but often characters and their choices make me sad. I snot cried when Jack died. I didn’t know Heath was going to die until that terrible moment, and then along with Zoey I was shattered. I hated that Erin Bates made such bad choices. But I’m also pleasantly surprised by characters! Shaunee’s evolution was lovely. Stark’s loyalty makes my heart happy. And Other Neferet has been a delightful discovery.
Who was your most difficult character to build, looks- and personality-wise?
—Kilah Gooding
P. C.: The most difficult character to write in the original House of Night books was Neferet. Her descent into Darkness and madness was a terrible journey to experience with her, especially because it began with a rape. I was raped when I was thirteen (NOT BY MY FATHER), and I understand all too well the lure of revenge and the self-loathing that kind of violence can create. Writing the novella Neferet’s Curse was one of the most difficult exercises of my life, but it was also cathartic. I’m glad I chose love and healing over anger and Darkness.
How have you found writing this alternative universe version of House of Night? Did you find it creatively freeing or challenging to rewrite the narrative and flip it on its head?
—Ted Ryan
P. C.: I’ve found it challenging, but also very satisfying. I have to continually remind myself that even though the characters have the same personality traits they also have had much different life experiences, and those experiences inform their actions and their emotions. It’s a little like recreating the characters from scratch. I have to know everything about their pasts in the Other World, and then allow them to show me their natures. I always know I’ve gotten it right when the writing comes easily. If I’m stuck or try to force a choice on a character everything stops and I have to go back to that character’s past. Again. This happened often with Other Neferet. She surprised me more than any character has in a long time. I think she’ll surprise you, too!
What kind of research do you do, and how long do you spend researching before beginning a book? Also, what is your writing outline process like?
—Bri’Ann piguet
P. C.: I like to old-school research! I have a huge library. I love to pore through texts, marking up pages and writing notes to myself. As I read, ideas begin to form and characters start speaking to me. It is also important that I visit the places I write about, which is why the majority of my books are set wherever I’m living (or have lived or visited). I believe it is important to ground fantasy in reality. Even my books that are pure fantasy, like the Divine Series, have huge pieces of the real world in them.
How long I spend researching depends on how long it takes me to start seeing the world and the people who will populate it, but the truth is I continue my research as long as I’m writing.
I hate outlining. Kristin is so much better at it than I am. When I outline alone, I basically just write notes that I turn into paragraphs. I usually have the beginning and the end of a book when I start writing—and maybe a few scenes in between. Then, thankfully, my characters take over!
K. C.: I love outlining so much! It’s impossible for me to start writing until I’ve outlined, especially because I don’t write sequentially, so I need that map to help keep track of where I am and where I’m going. First, I write a general Act I, Act II, Act III outline which serves as an overview of the beginning, climax, and resolution of the novel. Then, I’ll go back and do a chapter by chapter outline that connects the three acts. As I’m writing, I consistently remind myself that my outline is just a jumping-off point and that I can always change it as the story evolves.
What compels you to take locations from places you have visited and add them to your stories? (e.g. the catacombs and the buildings of the HoN setting?)
—Rhiannon “Rhinny” Rickets
P. C.: Part of my research process is to go to the places I’m us
ing as settings. I need to be there to really understand how it feels, looks, smells, etc. I’ve always loved writing fantasy or using paranormal elements, and because of that genre choice I think it’s important to ground my readers in reality so that they’ll come with me when I add the magick!
I would love to know—did you always see this series evolving into what it is now? Did Kristin? Do you still feel that sense of attachment, like there’s more story to tell in this world, or do you feel that after Forgotten it will be time to part with Tulsa for a while?
—Rhiannon Storm
P. C.: In 2005, I sold three books to St. Martin’s Press—Marked, Betrayed, and Chosen. I’d only written three chapters of Marked at that time, and I had zero clue the series would evolve the way it did. But by the time I was working on Chosen, the series had begun to take off, so my wonderful publisher and hero, Matthew Shear, said the words to me that every author dreams of hearing from their publisher: “P. C., write whatever you want! Do whatever you want to do with this world! We want more, more, more!” At that time, I brought in an additional mythology and began expanding the world and the characters, which is why the books shifted from Zoey’s first-person point of view to include other characters in third person—except when Z is the focus on a scene. Then she still carries the POV.
K. C.: I was nineteen when we first started writing the series and, for some reason, I assumed it would be a crazy, enormous success. Now, as a much older adult human, I’m blown away by its success!
P. C.: At this time, I don’t have any more books planned, but that doesn’t mean much. When I finished Redeemed I didn’t think I’d revisit the HoN world for at least a decade, and you see how that worked out …
K. C.: Currently, Found is the final book in the Other World series. Like P. C., I didn’t see returning to the HoN world for quite some time. In 2014 I had the idea to do an anniversary novel, (which ended up being Loved), but I never anticipated it would become its own series and breathe fresh life into the HoN. It’s all very exciting!
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