by Alexa Land
“Aw, and you’re missing it.”
“Oh believe me, I can recite that shit backwards and forwards.”
“Do you know all the words to the songs, too? Come on, let’s hear the one from Frozen. You always had a great singing voice, I bet you could do Elsa proud.”
Kai sneered at my teasing grin, just as the waiter appeared at our table and put down two glasses of water. It turned out to be Cole, and he pushed his curly hair back from his face and said, “Hey guys, sorry to keep you waiting. I had to go chase down my ex, because he left without his key lime pie.”
“River was here?” I asked.
“No, my other ex. Hunter. He and Brian come in a couple times a week to eat lunch and study, and always order pie to go. I have to wonder how they manage to forget it half the time.” His grin was affectionate. Then he got down to business and asked, “You guys ready to order?” We both ended up going with burgers and shakes.
When Cole left with the menus, Kai turned his attention back to me and asked, “So, what are you going to do about Alastair?”
“What, no lead-in or anything? We’re just talking about my love life now?”
“Yup.”
I sighed and fidgeted with my napkin before saying, “There’s nothing to do. He’s amazing, he’s leaving, and that sucks. End of story.”
“Do you know how sad you looked when you said that, Sawyer? I can tell you’re totally into this guy.”
“I’m an idiot. I know better than to get attached. He told me right from the start that he was just looking for a fling before he goes back home. I should just accept that and enjoy myself, instead of cursing the entire fucking universe for putting the perfect guy in my path and then giving us an expiration date. And that’s the last I’m going to say about it.” I was relieved when he actually let the subject drop.
After we ate our lunch, Kai read a text from his husband and said, “Jessie wants me to meet him at an old building just off Valencia. I don’t know what that’s about, but since Nana Dombruso is involved, it might get bizarre. Want to go on a field trip?”
“Why the hell not?” I signaled Cole for our check.
Chapter Seven
“Is Nana thinking about a new career busting ghosts?”
Kai chuckled at that as we stood on the sidewalk with his husband, looking up at a rundown, ninety-year-old firehouse, and said, “Apparently. It’s cool though, don’t you think?”
“It’s amazing. I just don’t get why it’s in this condition. It’s the kind of place that should have been snapped up the moment it went on the market, then turned into a pretentious microbrewery or some shit.”
Jessie said, “Actually, it goes on the market tomorrow, and that’s why Nana’s trying to make up her mind about it this afternoon. The fire department moved to modern facilities in 2009, and that’s when a couple bought it as an investment. They never got around to doing anything with it, obviously, and they’re selling it now so they can divvy up the money as part of their divorce agreement.”
The building’s brown brick facade had been tagged by pretty much every graffiti artist in the city, and all the windows in the two stories above the huge, arched, bay door were smashed out and boarded over. But beneath that was an attractive structure with period details from the nineteen-twenties, especially along the flat roofline, which was accented by a series of decorative cornices. It did look a hell of a lot like the building in Ghostbusters, but in true San Francisco style, this one was sandwiched tightly between its neighbors on either side.
As we wandered through the open doorway, I asked, “What’s Nana planning to do with this?”
A bunch of people were bustling around, and I recognized a lot of them from various parties and gatherings Kai and his husband had taken me to. Nana overheard us, and she came over and said, “Hi, boys! I’m thinking about buying this place and turning it into a shelter. I found out the other day that forty percent of the kids living on the street are gay homosexuals.” I raised an eyebrow at her turn of phrase, although her statistics were right-on. “That’s a crying shame! These poor kids come out to their families, then get kicked out and wind up living in dangerous conditions. I don’t know a damn thing about running a shelter, but I got some friends who do, and we’re all trying to decide if this space is right for what I have in mind.” She turned to a slender guy with blond, curly hair, who was talking to a young-looking brunet with glasses, and asked, “Christopher Robin, what do you and Jeffrey think about this place?”
I knew Christopher a little. He was actually an up-and-coming artist, so I wondered why she was asking his opinion on a shelter. He said, “We think it’d be great. There are a lot of bedrooms upstairs, and the kitchen and dining area were made to feed a big group. Plus this ground floor open space would make an excellent living area. I can just imagine it with a bunch of couches, a big entertainment center, some foosball tables, stuff to make it fun and welcoming. And that, well, that’s just epic,” he said, gesturing at the three brass poles connecting the upper floors to the former garage. “Living in a place like this would have been a dream come true when I was homeless. Don’t you think so, Jeffrey?” That answered my unasked question about why she was consulting him.
“God, could you imagine?” His friend looked around the drab, dirty space wistfully, clearly envisioning it the same way Christopher was. “A vintage firehouse would have seemed like heaven when I was living on the street.”
“Jeffrey and I both work at the shelter where we used to stay when we were teens. I’m a volunteer, he’s on staff,” Christopher told us. “That doesn’t make us experts, but in my personal opinion, this building is ideal.” He turned to Nana and said, “You’d be able to house maybe sixteen to eighteen kids, I think. Of course, you know you’ll need to bring in trained counselors and get state licensing to make this possible. But as far as the layout and size of this building, I think it’s perfect.”
“So do I,” Jeffrey said. “I’ve learned a fair amount about administration over the years, and I’d be happy to help with all the paperwork and red tape.”
“I’ll help, too,” I said. “I have experience working construction, and this place is going to take a lot of elbow grease to get it in shape for those kids.”
“Count us in,” Kai said. “We don’t know shit about construction or running a shelter, but we can paint walls or do whatever you need.” Jessie smiled at his husband, then stretched up to kiss his cheek.
Nana beamed at us and said, “Such good boys, every last one of you. Now I just need to know if this place is structurally sound. We can’t put our kids somewhere unsafe!” She looked around, then yelled, “Vincent! Is your building inspector done yet? I need to make a decision ASAP, before that money-hungry real estate agent sells it out from under me!” She pronounced it Ay-sap.
“Not yet, Nana,” her grandson Vincent called from across the room. “It’s important for him to take his time and find all the hidden problems, so don’t rush him. You and Alastair can’t sink your funds into a money pit.”
My heart skipped a beat at that name, and I looked around and asked, “Is he here?”
Jessie nodded, obviously pleased at my reaction. “He’s shadowing the building inspector. He’d dropped by my garage to say hello and talk cars earlier this afternoon, just as I was leaving to take Nana to look at a few properties. When he heard what she had in mind, he was instantly on board.”
“He sounds like a great guy,” Christopher said.
“He is.” I kept scanning the ground floor, wishing he’d appear.
“Last I saw, they were headed for the attic,” Jessie told me. “Maybe you want to go up and say hello.”
“Oh. Um, I shouldn’t bother him. What he’s doing is important.” I tried to pull up a neutral expression, so Jessie and Kai would stop grinning at me.
“It wouldn’t be a bother,” Jessie said, “especially since he’s mentioned you about a hundred times over the last few hours.”
That was nice to hear, but I tried to play it cool by saying, “I’ll just wait until he comes down,” and followed Nana when she offered to give us a tour of the building.
I kept looking for him though, and finally spotted Alastair a few minutes later when we were taking a look at the spacious kitchen. Trevor, the guy who’d hosted the wedding reception on Saturday, and who was married to Nana’s grandson Vincent, was trying out the appliances and telling Nana the six-burner stove was shot when Alastair and a man with a clipboard appeared in the doorway.
He was wearing the same outfit he’d had on when he’d dropped me off at the tattoo studio, now with the addition of a yellow hardhat and a layer of grime. His face was smudged with dirt, and so were his white button-down shirt and indigo jeans. I thought he looked sexy as hell like that.
His expression and demeanor were all business. Alastair’s brow was knit with concentration as he asked the building inspector a question, then listened intently to the answer. All of a sudden, it was easy to imagine him running his family’s company. He just exuded confidence and came across as effortlessly in charge. It was good that he’d chosen to get involved with Nana’s project, not only financially, but because he was clearly going to get things done.
Alastair gestured to the kitchen as he said something else to the inspector. When he spotted me, his game face instantly fell away. He stopped talking in mid-sentence, and his handsome features lit up with a glorious smile. I grinned at him, and he turned and said something to the man with a clipboard before heading in my direction.
I met him halfway across the kitchen, and he started to reach for me. But then he noticed his hands were dirty and held them up with an embarrassed smile. “I’ve been in every nook and cranny of this place this afternoon. I’m afraid I’m a bit of a mess.”
I pulled him into a hug and said, “It looks good on you.”
“I was going to text you when I finished here and find out how your appointment went. Does your new tattoo hurt?”
“Nah.”
“Would you tell me even if it did?”
“Probably not,” I admitted.
“Can I see it?”
“It’s all bandaged up. I’m supposed to keep it that way for a couple hours, but I can send you a photo later.”
“I look forward to it.” He smiled up at me, and I caught the hardhat as it fell off his head.
I kissed a clean spot on his forehead and said, “I’ll let you get back to what you were doing. I know everyone’s trying to make a decision quickly here. I think it’s wonderful that you offered to be a part of this, by the way.”
“The thing that keeps the family business from feeling like an albatross around my neck is exactly this, being able to do some good with the resources available to me. As soon as Jessie mentioned what his former employer had in mind, I knew I wanted to help in any way I could.”
I brushed my lips to his, then whispered in his ear, “I think you’re an amazing man, Alastair. Not just because of this. I already knew you were something special.”
He put his arms around me and kissed me tenderly. I forgot about everything, from the throbbing in my shoulder to all the people in that kitchen as I held him and returned the kiss, parting my lips for him, sighing with pleasure as the tip of his tongue found mine. A deep feeling of contentment settled in me as the heat of his body radiated through our clothes, and I breathed in his pleasant scent, not quite masked beneath the layers of deodorant, cologne, and shampoo, and even dust and wood from his forays into the deep recesses of the firehouse.
Eventually, a loud voice cut through the bubble of pleasure around us, as Nana exclaimed, “Isn’t that just the sweetest thing! It must have been a long time since they saw each other.”
“About five hours,” Kai told her, the amusement unmistakable in his voice.
I stepped back from Alastair, and he colored a little and said, “I’ve gotten you dirty. Apologies.”
He tried to brush a couple streaks of dust from the front of my shirt, but I grinned at him and said, “Totally worth it.”
“I’d better go finish up that inspection,” he murmured, his blue eyes focused on my lips. I nodded, handed him the hardhat and told him I’d talk to him later, and he smiled at me before leaving the kitchen.
“Jesus,” Kai muttered. “There was enough heat between the two of you to burn down the firehouse. What exactly happened during your weekend in San Diego? I was imagining sightseeing and some nice dinners out, maybe a bit of polite getting-to-know-you conversation. But obviously I’m wrong, because that was not a ‘I’ve known you four days’ kind of kiss.”
I glanced at the people around us, who’d all gone back to whatever they’d been doing before the Sawyer and Alastair show grabbed their attention, and lowered my voice as I said, “We barely left the bed. Well, except for the first night, when we went skinny dipping in the Pacific and our clothes washed out to sea. I don’t just mean we had sex the whole time, though we certainly did plenty of that. We also talked, and hung out, and watched movies, and ordered room service, and just enjoyed each other’s company. It’s funny, we went because Alastair had never seen San Diego, but once we got there, he had no interest in anything other than—”
“You.”
“Yeah.”
Kai’s brown eyes crinkled at the corners as he smiled and said, “Shit, Sawyer. I’m going to miss you.”
“What are you talking about?”
“You’re going to end up following him to London. It’s so obvious.”
“And do what, work at a UK Starbucks while he runs a multimillion-dollar empire? Someone like me doesn’t fit with someone like that.” Kai frowned at me, and I said, “That’s not poor self-esteem talking, it’s a simple statement of fact. Alastair and I exist in separate worlds. There might be a tiny bit of overlap while he’s here and going to college, but this isn’t his life. It’s a temporary reprieve before he takes on a huge amount of responsibility and rejoins his homophobic family. I’m sure they’d love me, by the way.”
“What does any of that matter in the face of a connection that intense? I’ve never seen anything like it, aside from….”
He grinned embarrassedly, and I filled in, “You and Jessie.”
“Exactly. It was every bit as intense when we first got together. I literally couldn’t stay away from him. Still can’t. I miss him like crazy when we’re apart, even if it’s just for a few hours.” Kai raised an eyebrow and asked, “Sound familiar?”
“No.”
He chuckled at that and said, “You lie.”
“And you’re a sappy, lovesick dork.”
“You know what else I am?”
“Happy. No need to point out the obvious, it’s written all over you.”
“I am, and I want that for you too, Sawyer, especially after watching that shitty relationship tear you apart for three fucking years.”
“Speaking of which, I’m glad I got this done today,” I said, lightly tapping the new ink on my chest. “It still doesn’t feel like closure, but then, I figured that would take more than an appointment at a tattoo parlor.”
“If you ever decide closure involves finding that asshole Tracy Garcia and kicking him in the nuts, I call shotgun on that little excursion.”
“For all I know, he’s still in Afghanistan. Be a bit of a commute.”
My best friend grinned at me. “Totally worth it, though.”
*****
Nana and Alastair decided to buy the firehouse. Based on the building inspector’s verbal report, the place was in good shape, aside from the cosmetic issues. He was going to be busy with paperwork, so I told Alastair to call me when he was done, and Kai dropped me off at home.
I found my dad eating dinner in front of the TV, which he did every night. He looked a good ten years older than he actually was, thanks to an overall failure to give a shit about things like combing his hair, exercising, putting on clean clothes, or shaving. Sometimes when I looked at him, I saw my future, a
nd it was enough to break me out in a cold sweat.
“Well, look what the cat dragged in,” he muttered. “What’re you doin’ running off to San Diego with friends when you should be job hunting?”
“I already found a new job. I start Thursday,” I told him, pausing in the doorway to the living room.
“Oh. Well, that’s something at least. Is it another construction job?”
“No, it’s something else.”
My dad shot me a look and asked, “Am I supposed to guess?”
“I, uh, got a job in a nightclub. I’ll be working nights, Thursdays through Saturdays. It’s just until something better comes along.”
He sighed and turned back to the TV. “Well, it’s a goddamn good thing you left the Army for a lucrative career slinging drinks in some dive.”
I felt like telling him the truth, just to see what would happen. I could imagine his face at the news that I was stripping and parading around in lingerie in front of a bunch of men, not tending bar. But of course, I didn’t say anything.
Instead, I hoisted my backpack onto my shoulder, the one without the tattoo, and started to head for the stairs. But then I paused and asked, “What happened to bowling?” Every Tuesday night like clockwork, my dad could be found at the lanes with his group of Army buddies.
“Rubio’s got some kind of stomach bug, sounds nasty. Since tonight’s league night, we need four to compete, and none of our alternates could make it.”
“I can take Rubio’s place if you want. I know how much you hate to miss bowling night.”
My dad flipped channels with a remote so worn out that the numbers weren’t legible anymore. He didn’t bother to glance at me as he said, “You suck at bowling. I’d rather sit home than go and lose.”
“Suit yourself.” I pushed down the hurt that sprang up in my chest and climbed the stairs, then closed and locked my bedroom door behind me.
Why the hell did I let him get to me like that? I should be glad he didn’t want to take me bowling, because that would have been an epically shitty way to spend an evening. There was no reason for it to hurt. I was twenty-three, not seven! If he didn’t want to spend time with me, then fuck him.