An entire month had come and gone, and still no sign of my angel. She never returned and even my dreams had become absent of her beauty and charm. As the days melted one into the other, I became certain that I imagined Ari’s entire existence. She was all in my head. There was no other explanation.
Loneliness crept in and I stuck to my rigorous schedule, working overtime until I nearly dropped from fatigue every night. The money was a big help, especially since those thugs stole several hundred dollars from my wallet, but it wasn’t my motivation. I couldn’t stare at the four walls of my room and feel the despair as it creeped in like some tangible demon.
The nurse I paid to help out part time kept up her end of the bargain and my mother was as comfortable as was possible. She understood my need for space, but guilt often found its way into my thoughts. If only there were more I could do for her, ease her suffering in some small way.
I wasn’t a magician or a miraculous healer.
The knowledge of my inadequacies only made me angry.
The heaviness of my life was taking a toll. I think I was close to losing my sanity. As hard as I tried to convince myself, I couldn’t shake the feeling I was being watched. Worse, I thought I saw glimpses of Ari in the mist and moonlight. Maybe I was crazy.
Wasn’t it common knowledge that abusive and stressful childhoods bred messed up adults?
If I asked my mother, she’d only find a way to make me feel better. Little lies and supplications meant to protect her son from the brutal truth. We both understood the part we were meant to play. Life was just one consecutive act from start to finish until that last curtain call.
Taking the tray I prepared for her dinner, I walked upstairs with a sense of dread. Every time I had to walk in there and see her pale thin frame lying on that bed, I became angrier. It wasn’t fair.
I hated this. Fuck cancer.
The room was quiet when I entered. For a split second I thought she was gone until I heard the gentle inhale and exhale of her breaths. I placed the tray where it would be within her reach once she was hungry and tucked her in, sliding the blanket around her body the same way she used to do when I was a child. Warm and snug like a burrito. I don’t know why that’s what I used to say but she loved it. We still joked about how to make a burrito with the covers.
For long minutes I stood, staring down at the woman who gave me life and raised me with such love and affection. She’d been hard on me and I needed it, a force of nature when I tried to rebel against her or any kind of authority. It took a strong woman to keep me on track.
I’d never forget that or her sacrifices.
Closing the door behind me, I padded across the hall to my room. The day had been long, and the construction site was constantly busy in preparation for the new wing of the local hospital. Eyes heavy, I barely managed to slip off my boots before I fell down on the bed with a flop. Less than a minute later, I was out.
“Evan . . .”
The sweet voice of Ari filled my head and commanded my soul. I sat up and blinked, smiling as her curvy frame stood at the end of my bed.
“You came back,” I whispered in awe.
“Yes, but our time is limited.”
Limited? Why? I was about to ask when she held out her hand. There wasn’t a thought in my head other than joining her, no matter how little time we had.
Our hands rose as they met palm to palm.
She wouldn’t hold my gaze and I felt almost stricken with concern. Something was wrong.
“Ari,” I managed to choke out, overwhelmed with the amount of emotion that coursed through my body and raced along with my heart. A devastating melancholy combined with a feeling so hopeless I wanted to cry.
It wasn’t my feelings or desires, they had to belong to Ari.
She connected to me in some odd way and we seemed to share a piece of our soul with one another. Our feelings were so transparent, so real, at times it was almost like we were one mind. I couldn’t explain how I knew this so quickly, especially since we’d only spoken the day she rescued me. Undaunted, I couldn’t shake the feeling that my dreams of her were somehow real.
“Why are you so sad?” I asked, brushing a stray strand of hair back behind her ear. “You break my heart with such sorrow.”
She shook her head and lay her cheek against my chest, directly over my frantically beating heart. “You can ask such a thing when you’re surrounded by your own pain and suffering?”
I gulped loudly. Before this moment we hadn’t spoken about the other occupant of my house. My mother was in the next room, but she wasn’t coherent. Day after day cancer ate away at her insides and I was powerless to stop it. My job barely paid for the medications and hospital bills and I’d long ago realized that my father would never be any help.
He left us when I was only eight and I buried all the feelings that accompanied his abandonment.
The responsibility to provide for my family landed on my shoulders alone and I preferred to live one day at a time. I didn’t think of the past and I didn’t dwell on the future. I simply existed in the moment.
“Life is fleeting and precious,” I whispered as my arms wrapped around her without a second thought. The quote was one my mother had repeated often in my childhood, especially after my dad was gone. “We have to latch onto the happiness we’re given.”
Ari was my happiness. I knew it instantly. She was everything I needed and an escape from the heavy toll my life had become. A part of me knew this couldn’t last. All fairy tales came to an end, but I would hold onto her as long as I could. Real or not, she provided something I needed above all else.
Understanding and acceptance, a companionship I lacked.
Maybe I should have doubted why she appeared the night I was attacked or stopped to consider why she walked into my life at the lowest point. Maybe I’d never know. Call it fate, destiny, whatever you wished. All I knew was that Ari and I had a connection. We were supposed to meet.
“Evan?”
I looked down and into her rich dark eyes and knew I was lost. I’d remain that way as long as this girl would let me. A fierce need took over and I lowered my head, inches from her plump lips that shined with a bubblegum pink gloss. “Yes?”
“That was beautiful.”
I almost forgot what I said, struck by how sweet and tempting she looked in the pale beams of moonlight. Lifting my hand slowly, I cupped her cheek. “It’s true, Ari.”
She licked her lips in response as the gloss was washed away and I felt a sudden urge to claim and possess those same lips. I wanted to feel their pressure. Taste their sweetness. Share in their warmth.
My mouth was pressed to hers before I could reason or deny myself the act.
A soft moan issued from my throat and I deepened the kiss, pulling her tighter against me. I don’t know how long my lips possessed hers or how we ended up on my balcony. I became coherent only when we finally parted, both of us gasping for breath.
Ari’s fingers clutched at the material of my flannel shirt, bunching the fabric as her eyes remained closed. I was beginning to think she didn’t like the kiss until a wickedly sexy grin appeared on her lips.
“Evan, that was amazing.”
“I thought so, too,” I teased as her eyes snapped open. “Just so you know, I plan on doing it again soon.”
The chocolate depths of her eyes reflected my own desires and twinkled with mischief. I knew she felt the same yearning that I did. Our mutual attraction was obvious.
“If I asked you to hold me until the sun rose, would you?”
“Right here on the balcony or in my bed?” No, I wasn’t rushing toward sex, but I did like the idea of watching her squirm a little.
She smacked at my forearm lightly as I tugged her closer, resting my chin on the top of her head. “How about this?” I asked as my hands rested on her trim waist, sliding slowly around until I held her firmly within my embrace.
“Perfect,” she whispered in that voice that I adored.
“Perfect,” I echoed, wishing the sun would never come up and she wouldn’t have to leave my side again.
5
Ari
“Where are you going?”
Vraul’s voice halted me before I used my shield to disappear. For weeks I’d been visiting Evan as often as I dared, but most of our interactions occurred in his dreams. I joined him almost every night as we walked the beach, talked, held hands, and kissed under the vibrant moon. He made my heart soar. Everything about Evan was perfect, from his sexy smile to his rugged male scent to his quick wit and intelligence.
If I was honest, I’d say that I was entirely too attached to that human boy.
“Ari? Where do you keep disappearing?”
“If I told you, you wouldn’t believe me.”
He frowned as our eyes met. “You’ve met someone,” he observed. Folding his arms across his chest, Vraul looked incredibly displeased.
“What? I can’t make friends?”
“What daemon makes you risk going against your father’s wishes? This is . . .” he trailed off and the truth seemed to occur to him for the first time. “Damn, Ari. Tell me you aren’t leaving to meet with humans.”
Shrugging, I didn’t commit one way or another. “Who I spend my time with shouldn’t matter.”
Vraul strode forward, obviously agitated. “It does, Ari. You are a daemon. That’s enough for you to think through what you’re doing. If that’s not a deterrent you need to remember that among our kind you’re royalty. How many females are appointed an overseer? How many fathers sit on the High Court?”
I didn’t want to admit he was right. “So?”
“Only you, Ari.”
Becoming angry, I shoved a finger into his chest. “That doesn’t mean I have to live like a prisoner or have my every move watched and scrutinized. It’s not fair.”
Vraul captured my hand in his large palm and squeezed. “Your safety is important. I take my job seriously.”
Sighing, my head fell forward against his chest. “I know, Vraul.”
“I’m more than your overseer, Ari. I’m your friend.” His voice caught and I wondered why he seemed so emotional. Vraul commanded a legion of soldiers. He was ruthless, strong, and brutal. His emotions rarely surfaced. Lately, I’d seen way more than usual.
Lifting my head, I searched his eyes for the truth. I knew he was hiding something. Either my father or my brothers were behind this. As if on cue, there was a knock on the door and then several bodies shuffled through.
Vraul released me and left my side quickly, seconds before my brothers entered.
“Ari.”
“Sis.”
“Enjoying your confinement?”
I snorted, glaring the five of them down. Mak, Den, Sver, Tank, and Von were my closest brothers and the most irritating. “I managed to elude all five of you. It was worth it.”
Mak smirked. “You always say that.”
“And yet you’re always in trouble,” Tank observed.
Den laughed. “Poor Vraul.”
Vraul grinned at their antics. “It’s never boring.”
Sver clapped him on the back. “You should petition the High Court for another job. She’s too much effort.”
Vraul shook his head. “I enjoy all the chaos.”
All five of my brothers chuckled.
“Chaos keeps boredom away,” I added, beaming a wide smile at Vraul. “He’d be so lost without me.”
Vraul cleared his throat and I thought I saw him blush. Interesting. He was so strange lately.
Mak turned to the others and the five exchanged a knowing look. “So, Vraul, I heard you turned down a recent proposition.”
Proposition? What was Mak talking about?
Vraul scowled. “It’s not important.”
“Oh, but I think it is,” Tank contradicted.
Von and Den watched Vraul’s reaction closely as Sver faced my overseer. “The High Court’s legion commander was offered a position as Hadron’s second.”
Wow. Vraul would become the next ruler of the third circle. “And you said yes, right?” I asked, excited for my friend.
Vraul grumbled under his breath. “No.”
Confused, I placed a hand on his arm. “Why not? You deserve the recognition. You’d be the most powerful seat in the High Court apart from my father.”
Vraul didn’t answer for a moment. His dark eyes met mine, void of their normal flames and brilliance. “I’d have to leave you to fulfill my duties.”
“When?”
“Immediately,” he answered through a clenched jaw. “I was not ready to make that choice.”
“I don’t want you to leave Vraul, but it’s awfully selfish of me to ask you to stay.”
His expression was unreadable. “I stay because I wish it. End of discussion.”
Mak and Sver exchanged another look. Frustrated that something else was going on and no one was explaining it to me, I kicked my brothers from the room.
“Out, now. You’re all annoying me.”
They tried to protest but I wasn’t having any more of their games. The door shut behind them with a click and I turned to Vraul. “I think they like to irritate me.”
He smiled, the familiar amber flames returning as they flickered with amusement. “I would agree.”
It was nearly dawn when I arrived home, stifling a yawn as I entered my bedchamber and stepped from my shield. I was exhausted but happy as I sank onto my bed and smiled into the darkness. Evan’s kisses still lingered on my lips as my fingers rose to press against the swollen flesh. Every night it grew more difficult to leave him behind and return to my hidden world of loneliness and confinement. Evan was quickly becoming more than a friend or someone to pass the time with. I was addicted to him in ways that should have frightened me but didn’t.
Distracted, I didn’t notice I wasn’t alone until a voice spoke into the darkened room.
“Where have you been?”
My father’s deep voice boomed into the chamber and I jumped to my feet. “Father?”
Sudden flames licked up the walls of the room and illuminated the figures of Balfor, Vraul, and several guards of the High Court. Frightened to say a word, my gaze darted to Vraul. His serious expression and worried gaze let me know my father already suspected the truth.
Lying would only incur his wrath. “I wanted to see the sun and beach,” I whispered, which was partially true.
“You were confined to your chamber.”
“The month is nearly up,” I argued, “and I haven’t exposed myself to anyone.” No one new. Evan was no longer a stranger, so he didn’t count.
“Ari, I can smell the human.”
This was going to end badly. I didn’t know what to say to make my father understand. He was so opposed to the surface world that none of my arguments were ever enough to convince him. I was done trying to make him see how I felt. My point of view never mattered, only his rules.
“Answer me!” He roared when I kept silent.
A question was never posed but we both knew he wanted me to admit to meeting with a human.
My chin lifted in defiance. “Yes.”
“Yes? You admit you’re still returning to the surface?”
I nodded.
“And you admit that you are meeting humans?”
“Yes,” I managed to reply, frightened by the deadly calm tone of his voice.
Silence. Pure rage flashed across his hardened features. I’d crossed the line one too many times. I could see the anger fade to resignation. “Guards, escort Vraul and Ari to Rehab room #1.”
Vraul’s gaze sharpened as he realized we were both to be punished for my choices. He didn’t dare speak a word, but I caught his look of terror when he realized I would be harmed.
The guards led us through the dark corridors of the Underworld and into the carnage of the Rehab rooms. A place that Vraul knew well but until this moment I had never entered. Scream of pain and anguish echoed from various locations whil
e moaning and groaning could be heard as haunted voices begged for mercy. The slap of flesh and the scent of sex also lingered in the air. Nothing was forbidden in these chambers. Any means of torture and torment were permitted.
“Vraul, lash Ari to the cross,” my father ordered, his face a blank mask of emotion.
I wasn’t sure I heard correctly until Vraul fell to his knees before my father, head bowed. “Great Balfor, please allow me the honor of taking her lashes instead. I beg you, let me suffer her punishment.”
My father sneered down at Vraul, unmoved. “Why should I grant your request?”
“It is my failure. I was remiss in my duties as her overseer.”
My father’s jaw pumped a few times in anger before his gaze turned in my direction. “I will only allow this if Ari is the one to crack the whip.”
“No,” I wailed, “just lash me and get this over with. Vraul doesn’t deserve punishment. I’m the one who disobeyed you.”
“You disobeyed the High Court,” he contradicted, “humiliated your father and brothers, dragged your overseer into your lies, and now ask me to be lenient?” My father shook his head. “No, I will not grant your request.”
Which request? Me or Vraul?
Vraul was still on his knees. “Please, my lord Balfor, let me take her lashes plus mine. I will endure her suffering as much as my own.”
With a growl of anger my father waved his hand and the guards rushed forward, stripping Vraul to the waist as he was lashed backward to a wooden cross. His forehead fell forward as he released a ragged breath. “Ari, you must do this.”
“No!” I yelled, “I won’t, Vraul. I can’t.”
Grabbing a coiled leather whip from the racks of weapons nearby, my father strode forward and shoved it into my hand. “You will do this without delay. Remember this moment. Your choices affect more than you alone. The next time you choose to rebel against me, think on how others are harmed by your defiance.”
Fat tears rolled down my cheeks as I shook my head, shoulders heaving with every breath I took. “I’m so sorry, Vraul. Forgive me, please,” I begged, lifting the whip.
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