Chapter Five
I woke up to the sound of my own screaming. I sat up in bed with a sudden bolt. It was pitch black and I couldn’t see a thing. My heart was trying to claw its way out of my chest. Hot tears dribbled out from my eyes. My breaths were sharp and strangled as I tried to breathe past the vigorous thudding of my heart. Panic smothered me as my nightmare came back to me in scattered pieces. My parents’ deaths, Maria having her way with me, torturing me with her cold power. I could still feel ice crawling through my veins. No one had been there to save me. I was on my own as she killed me slowly.
Lorenzo was there to calm me down in an instant. He hadn’t turned the light on. He held me close to him, stroking my hair and murmuring words of comfort. The side of my face was resting against his chest; he wasn’t wearing a shirt. His skin was so warm, as was the magic that radiated off him. I could hear the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. Listening to that soft thump helped me to slow down my own heart.
“You ok now?” he asked me quietly, still holding me close and stroking my hair.
“No,” I mumbled. “I don’t think I ever will be.”
“I told you it will take some time. I know right now it feels like you’ll never be ok but it’s not always going to be that way.”
“Maybe I’ll rest easier when I know that the people who murdered my parents suffered the same fate. I want them gone.”
“I know, Joan. I know.”
“I want them gone,” I repeated in a choke, holding Lorenzo tighter. “I want this pain gone.”
“Pain is a part of being human. Pain reminds us of our vulnerability, that even though we are immortal, we are not invincible. When all you feel is nothing, that’s when you know you’ve crossed the line where monsters lurk in the shadows, that you’ve become the thing that people fear.”
“Sometimes you need to be a monster to destroy another monster.”
“That may be true but if you turn into the monster you are trying to destroy... then what was the point of it all?”
“Sacrifices need to be made to win a war. If I need to become a monster to wipe out my enemies, then so be it. It won’t be for nothing. If I win, the world will have peace. I might not come back from the things I’ve done to accomplish my goal but at least I’ll know I made a difference.”
“Someone as young as you, having ideals like this is going to get you killed.”
“Not if I’m trained correctly and the techniques I’m taught are flawless. Just how good of an assassin is Cyrus?”
“One of the best.”
I pried myself out of Lorenzo’s arms. He scooted off the bed when I left his embrace, giving me personal space. I already missed his warmth, even though I had felt magic underneath his skin; power made me uneasy. I was tempted to reach out and drag him back. I disregarded that thought immediately.
“Arrange a meeting. I want to meet Cyrus,” I said, staring up at Lorenzo’s silhouette.
“Absolutely not, not until Damian gives his consent.”
“The last thing Damian wants is his niece to turn into a cold-hearted killer. He will not give his consent.”
“I will not go behind his back.”
“You said if I chose this path, he would accept it and let me go.”
“I did. But that doesn’t mean I’m going to pave the way for you without telling Damian first. You need time to grieve, not make rash decisions.”
“My decision will not change within a minute, an hour, a day, a week, a month, or a year. I want to become a weapon. I want to be the one responsible for the agency’s downfall. I want to be the one who changes history. I will move damn mountains if I have to.”
Lorenzo let out a heavy sigh and made the move to leave. “There’s still a couple of hours before the responsible hour of the morning to be awake. Get what sleep you can. This conversation without Damian present is over. I don’t want to hear it again.”
“But–”
“But nothing. It’s over. It’s done. Damian is your guardian. You need to have this discussion with him, not me. If Cyrus takes you under his wing without Damian’s say so and something happens to you, Damian will never forgive me.”
“Fine. Whatever.”
“Damn stroppy teenagers,” Lorenzo muttered under his breath as he walked out of the room.
I guess I should have thanked him for calming me down. There was no point calling out to him. He made it quite clear that our conversation was over. Maybe I would thank him later after he had the chance to cool off.
I let out a huff and lay down, pulling up the sheets.
I spent the next few moments tossing and turning, unable to get comfortable. I fluffed up my pillow and tried to settle for one sleeping position. The fussier I was, the less likely I’d be able to get more sleep.
I knew nightmares were just around the corner but I needed to relax. They were just nightmares. They weren’t real. The only thing that had been real was the haunting memory of my parents’ death. Reliving that in dreams wouldn’t physically hurt me. Emotional scarring was unavoidable. Lorenzo said that would heal with time. I doubt my thirst for revenge would pass until everyone that had a hand in my parents’ deaths were no longer breathing.
I was standing in a dark abyss. I raised my hand to my face. I could see myself but everything around me was an infinite darkness. It was as if I had fallen into limbo.
Rain splatters soaked my skin. I could see no rain. There were no water droplets dribbling down my arms. I held out both of my hands in front of me. I could feel rain smack my open palms but the water was invisible and left behind no traces. Was it some form of magic?
“Are you ready yet, Joan?” a voice murmured from within the darkness. It was the same honey coated voice I had heard on the phone: Cyrus.
“Yes,” I said, answer automatic.
“Do you know what I am?” Cyrus asked me, tone dark and ominous. My skin crawled.
“An assassin... and something more if this is real.”
“The second is not as important as the first. Are you ready to succumb to darkness in order to achieve your goal? If you wish to be an assassin, you need to break ties with your humanity. Assassins who cling to the light don’t last very long in this cruel world.”
“I’ll do anything.”
“Good. That’s what I like to hear. I will come for you when it’s safe. Don’t rely on anyone else to teach you. There is no one better than me. I will give you everything you desire and more.”
“How long will I be waiting for?”
“Hopefully not long. I am eager to train you as soon as I can. You will be the perfect weapon.”
“Why? Why me?”
“An unsuspecting beauty such as yourself will deceive everyone.”
I smiled, not sure if he could see. He must be able to because he wouldn’t have said I was beautiful.
“Surely you jest?”
“No, Joan. That innocent face will fool even the smartest of foes.”
“Do you really think I’d be a successful killer?” I asked, folding my arms.
“Once you learn to dissociate yourself from your feelings, you can be anyone you want to be. My training is harsh. You’ll need a lot of stamina to keep up.”
“Before I agree to anything, what are your plans for me so I know what it is I’m signing up for?”
“That would ruin the fun. I will part with that information once your training begins. For now, you have no choice but to trust me. Like I said, I’m the only one who can give you what you desire. Those you love will hold you back. I will set you free.”
“Is there anything I can do to prepare myself before you come for me?”
“Run,” he replied in a whisper that echoed and faded into the darkness.
The dream shattered. I woke to sunlight streaming on my face, wondering if that dream was real. It was as if I could still feel rain splatter against my skin. Run? Run from what? Or did he just mean run in general so I could work on my stamina?
Whiskers was curled up on the pillow next to me. His green eyes were fixed on me, watching me carefully. I reached out to pat him. He rubbed his face against my hand and started to purr when I scratched the underside of his chin. Now I really wanted to get a cat. I had never owned pets before.
“He’s taken a shine to you. He doesn’t like anyone but me,” Lorenzo said from the doorway. He was wearing a bright yellow singlet that made his golden eyes seem darker. Black denim shorts sat just above his knees.
“There’s different cereal boxes on the table, bowl and milk included. I didn’t know what you’d like so I’ve given you a selection,” he said.
“Thanks, and thanks for earlier as well. You didn’t have to come in here and calm me down. I would have been fine.”
“Damian wanted me to look after you. I needed to make sure you were ok. Leaving you on your own wasn’t an option. If you don’t want cereal, there’s bread for toast, or leftover pizza.”
“Why are you so loyal to Damian? I’m curious.”
Lorenzo ran his hand through his hair. The blonde streaks looked a lot brighter in the sunlight, almost golden. “He’s my best friend. He may be the coven’s second in command but my loyalty is to him as a person, not his position. We’ve been friends for decades.”
“Just how old are you two?”
“Old enough. Get out of bed, princess. Breakfast isn’t going to pour itself,” he said, pressing himself off the door. He walked away without another word. I guess age was a sensitive subject to guys as well, not just women. Good to know.
I climbed out of bed. I gave Whiskers a final pat before slipping out of the room.
I wasn’t sure if I should tell Lorenzo that I had a dream about Cyrus. I needed confirmation that the conversation between us had been real. My mind couldn’t have conjured something like that up, right? Maybe I didn’t need to ask and just trust my gut. But if it had been real, that meant Cyrus was more than just an assassin. He wasn’t human. I was leaning towards a mage since I had felt his magic. Could I work with someone who had power greater than I could comprehend? He said his training was harsh. Did he use magic to manipulate people? What if he brainwashed me and turned me into the ultimate killing machine? I wanted to control my own actions. I didn’t want to become a puppet.
I chose cornflakes and poured the cereal into a bowl. I sloshed some milk onto my breakfast, added a little sugar, and sat down at the table.
Lorenzo was sitting across from me, eating toast. He was chewing slowly and eyeing me up suspiciously.
“What?” I questioned before I had my first spoonful of breakfast.
“Something’s up with you. Spill.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said, not dropping eye contact. Damian said looking away meant you had something to hide. If I looked Lorenzo in the eye and lied convincingly, he’d buy it.
“Yeah-huh, sure. I’ll take your shopping bags hostage until you answer me truthfully,” Lorenzo said, finishing off his toast. “You have no reason to lie to me. I’m here to help.”
“Is Cyrus a mage?”
Lorenzo eyes narrowed. “Did he contact you?”
I nodded and continued to eat my cereal. I figured I was less likely to get in trouble if I kept my mouth occupied with food. It’s not my fault Cyrus reached out to me. I was innocent. If I stayed quiet about the whole thing, Lorenzo wouldn’t yell at me. He already said the conversation involving Cyrus becoming my teacher was over until Damian was present. Lorenzo had made that quite clear this morning. If I let him talk without my input, I wouldn’t be at fault.
“Cyrus does possess magic but he’s not a mage as such. He’s a Dream Shuffler. Dream Shufflers can access a person’s mind from a distance, when the subject is asleep or awake. He can make them relive memories in dreams, create fear landscape for them to overcome, or simply screw up a person so much they can’t tell the difference between reality or fiction, driving them mad. Those he tortures and leaves alive generally take their own life to escape from the nightmares that plague them.”
“That’s awful.”
“That’s Cyrus. He is walking a very thin line as far as the rules are concerned but the council has done nothing. Cyrus has the power to compromise everything, their secrets, their identities, but is still breathing. That leads me to believe that he’s in the council’s pocket already. The system is so damned corrupt.”
“You think the council is using him as their own personal assassin?”
“It’s the only explanation that makes sense but there’s no way in hell I’d accuse either of them face to face. No thank you. I’m keeping that opinion to myself and you should do the same.”
“Are the council that influential?”
“They stopped Dane from hunting you. That in itself is a feat nobody else can say they’ve accomplished. They are a society you don’t mess with. If you do, you’ll dance with death.”
“If the council are that frightening, then why have they recruited Cyrus as their personal assassin?”
“They only hire the very best. They probably have Cyrus on call if they don’t want to get their hands dirty and tarnish their name. He is very efficient and can be subtle if he needs to be.”
“Subtle?”
“He has different signatures he leaves behind depending on who his targets are. Carving Swastika for the Nazis that cover their entire back, cutting out tongues for snitches, things like that.”
“That’s disgusting. Are you telling me all of this to put me off? Because it’s not working.”
Lorenzo placed his elbows on the table and rested his chin on the arch of his palms. “Cyrus turned into an assassin to wipe out the Nazis because he was kept in Auschwitz, one of the nastiest concentration camps of World War Two. When he ran out of Nazis to kill, he moved onto other targets. I’m not trying to put you off. I’m simply informing you about the kind of person Cyrus is.”
“You’re definitely trying to put me off.”
Lorenzo gave me a charming smile that reached his eyes. “Assassins are cold and heartless, my dear Joan, but you already knew that. Putting you off isn’t something I can do when your mind is already made up. You are a lot like Damian in that regard so I’m left with no other choice but to tell you what I can, not to persuade you, but to inform you.”
“Fine, inform me of this. What is Cyrus going to do to me should I chose to have him as my teacher?”
Lorenzo’s elbows slipped from the table and he folded his arms. That charming smile melted away into something more cold, as did his eyes. “I’ll repeat what I said before. Cyrus will take all the light inside you and replace it with darkness.”
“That barely tells me anything.”
“I can’t go into detail because I don’t know what he will do to you. What I do know is that he will push you to breaking point. He won’t force you to do things you aren’t comfortable with, such as torture and cutting off limbs. He may turn you into a killer that leaves behind neat corpses. Poison, clean head shots... The list goes on.”
“Does poison work on Tainted Beings?”
“If the dosage is high enough, yes. I have a feeling Cyrus will have you make a name for yourself. The best way to do that will be taking down immortal crime lords the agency are too hesitant to go near.”
“What makes you say that?”
“Because it hasn’t been done and that’s probably the best way to get into the agency’s good books. You want to be a Trojan horse, don’t you?”
“Yeah, I do.”
“After Cyrus has trained you to perfection, that’s the best starting point. Take all the time you can to have a normal life because everything will change when you become Cyrus’s weapon.”
“Normal,” I repeated with a laugh, using air quotations. “You’re hilarious.”
There was nothing normal about my life. Pretending otherwise was a waste of time. How could I act like everything was normal when my parents were dead and my uncle was a powerful mage that could m
ake people kneel without lifting a finger? How could I be normal when my thought process was purely based around becoming a lethal weapon? I couldn’t be normal, not when everything around me was crazy.
“As normal as things are going to be. Is that better?” Lorenzo reiterated, waving his hand around. “The world is an odd place. Normal is overrated, I know, but spend what time you have left in that bubble of normality. You’re going to wish you did when Cyrus is through with you.”
“He’s going to chew me up and spit me back out, isn’t he?”
“Basically... Am I putting you off yet?”
I shook my head. “No.”
Lorenzo leaned forward and grabbed my empty cereal bowl, sliding it across the table. “Go get changed. I need to drop you and your wardrobe back at Damian’s before he thinks I kidnapped you.”
“I’m sure there’s not a woman on the planet that wouldn’t mind being kidnapped by you,” I muttered under my breath, leaving the table.
“I beg to differ. The women who bat for the other team wouldn’t appreciate my gorgeousness,” he called after me, laughing.
I didn’t bother glancing back or giving him a witty retort. He had me there. I couldn’t deny that he was nice to look at. He was sexy and he knew it. There I go, getting distracted again...
I shut the bedroom door behind me for some privacy so I could get changed in peace. I chucked my pyjamas into the overnight bag. I slipped into shorts and a singlet. I brushed my hair and tied it up into a ponytail, tucking the stray strands behind my ears. I nearly jumped when I felt the back of the earring stab my finger. I had forgotten I got my ears pierced yesterday. Silly me.
There was a knock at the door.
“Yeah?” I called out, leaving the door shut.
“Damian’s here. He’s just loading up the shopping bags into his car.”
“Sounds like he didn’t want to leave me alone with you for another day.”
“Apparently. I’d had enough dealing with a stroppy teenager anyways.”
“You’re a tool.”
“Sharper than you.”
“Bite me.”
“Too adolescent for my taste, sweetheart.”
I’m glad there was a door between us because he wouldn’t see how red I was until I opened it. I would wait until the flush in my cheeks died down before setting foot outside. I wanted to slap him silly. I wasn’t embarrassed. I was more flustered than anything. God, he was such a tool.
I grabbed the overnight bag after I had finished packing everything. I let out a few steady breaths and opened the door.
Lorenzo was standing just outside, grinning like a fool. His arms were folded behind his back in an attempt to look innocent. I wasn’t buying it, not one bit.
“You’re actually a really nice person when you’re not being a total tool,” I said.
“That’s what makes it interesting.” He wiggled his eyebrows. “Being proper and formal is boring. Take it easy, kiddo,” he said, resting his hand on the top of my head. “Be normal.”
“I want to be extraordinary.”
“You already are.” Lorenzo smiled and his hand slipped from my head.
I returned the smile and felt my heart skip a beat.
“She’s all yours, Damian.” Lorenzo leaned forward; the side of his face hovered by mine. “Remember what I said. Treat him fairly.”
“I will,” I promised.
Knowing Damian was The Executioner that the magic community feared most changed nothing. He was my uncle and loved me dearly. He would protect me, no matter the cost. He was powerful and scary but only when he needed to be. I would treat him fairly and wouldn’t treat him any differently. After everything he had done for me, he didn’t deserve to be treated poorly. I wouldn’t do that to him, not ever.
I walked down the hall to where Damian was standing and gave him a hug.
“Hey,” I murmured into his chest, feeling his arms wrap around me.
“Hey,” Damian replied in a voice equal to mine, soft and quiet.
“I missed you,” I said, not letting him go.
“Likewise. I hope Lorenzo wasn’t too much of a pain.”
“Hey, I can still hear you, you know,” Lorenzo called down the hall.
“Good to know you’re not going deaf in your old age,” Damian joked, a trace of laughter in his words.
“You’re one to talk.”
“Thank you for taking care of her. I hope it wasn’t too much trouble,” Damian said, paying no attention to Lorenzo’s retort.
Damian eased out of the hug and gave my shoulder a gentle squeeze.
“None at all,” Lorenzo replied, the sarcasm subtle yet easily detectable if you knew it was there.
“Let’s get you home,” Damian said, stepping aside so I could get to my shoes. “Before Lorenzo decides to dig himself a deeper hole.”
“What did I do?” Lorenzo asked, all innocent.
“What didn’t you do,” I mumbled, slipping into the sandals and doing up the straps. I had to press my hand against the wall for balance.
“Oh, nothing,” Damian answered Lorenzo, voice oozing with sarcasm. “Have a good rest of the day, my friend.”
“Mmhm, you too. Don’t call again.”
“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Damian said with a wave of his hand. “Ciao.”
“You two are so weird,” I mentioned when Damian led me out of the house and garage.
Damian laughed in response. “Oh, you don’t know the half of it.”
“I don’t think I want to know,” I mumbled when Damian opened the car door for me.
“Wise decision. Just how much did you guys spend yesterday?”
“Didn’t Lorenzo give you the receipts?” I asked, slipping into the passenger seat.
Damian shut my door and dashed to the driver’s side. He got into the car, started the engine, and shut his door.
“Let’s get out of here before he notices,” Damian said, putting the car into gear.
“I don’t think–”
“Shh,” Damian interrupted me, laughing. He backed out of the driveway and drove off. Something told me that he wasn’t going to get away with it that easily but I let him have his fun.
Everlasting Flame Page 5