by Lori Wilde
“So, enlighten me. What is my greatest flaw?”
“Pretzel girl.”
“What?”
“You twist and bend and change yourself to please whoever you’re with.”
She looked chagrined. “And that’s a bad thing?”
“We don’t need to label things as good or bad. I’m just pointing out that you tend to live your life for other people instead of for yourself.”
“That’s called altruism.”
“It’s called not looking out for your own best interest.”
She downed the rest of the champagne. He cleared his throat, lifted his eyebrows at her.
“What?” she said. “It’s my wedding night. I’m allowed to get a little tipsy. That champagne is damn good, by the way.”
“Should be. It cost a hundred dollars a bottle.”
“What!” Her eyes flew wide. “Your brothers are insane.”
“Welcome to the Lockhart family. We don’t play by anyone’s rules.”
“What have I gotten myself into?” she muttered, but she smiled a soft little smile that told him she was secretly pleased to be part of his gang of rabble-rousers.
“I’m ordering room service,” he said. “What would you like?”
“I’ll have whatever you’re having.”
“No, no. You don’t get to do that.”
“Do what?”
“Change yourself to please me. I’m ordering a steak. What do you want?”
“Do they have tacos?”
He leafed through the room service menu. “Chicken or beef?”
“Chicken,” she said.
“Good for you.” He picked up the phone.
“While you do that, I’ll FaceTime with Mom and see how Julie is.”
He called for food. She called her mother. When he finished ordering, he came to sit beside Tara and waved to Julie as his mother-in-law—mother-in-law, now that felt weird to say—held the baby up for them to see her.
Pure happiness washed over him, and Rhett felt like he was the luckiest man alive.
The food arrived, and they ended the call. They ate and watched an animated movie, Pixar’s latest, just to have something to do. The tension between them was palpable.
When the movie was over, he said, “I have a feeling many more movies like this are in our future.”
“The baby in the show made me miss Julie.”
“Me too. You wanna go home and get her?” he asked.
“I’d like nothing more.” She sighed. “But it’s already ten o’clock. By the time we got to Mom’s and picked her up and made it back home, it would be after midnight. Too late to be dragging Julie out in the night air.”
“Good point.”
“Plus we’ve been drinking.”
“We had one glass before dinner and a movie. The alcohol has worn off.”
“You want some more champagne?” she asked.
“Why not?”
She got up from the couch and refilled their champagne flutes, brought them back, handed one to him. “We didn’t toast before.”
He held up his glass. “To Julie, the best thing that ever happened to us.”
She clinked her rim against his, echoed, “To Julie.”
“She is awesome.” Rhett heard his voice turn sappy and he didn’t feel the least bit guilty for it.
“The sweetest little thing.”
“I wonder what her personality is going to be like,” he mused.
“I hope she’s laid-back like you,” Tara said. “Life is easier when you don’t take it too seriously.”
“Happy-go-lucky has its downside.”
She lowered her lashes. “And what is that?”
“People never take you seriously.”
She turned to kneel on the couch cushions facing him. Her eyes shiny. The champagne was getting to her already. “I take you seriously.”
“You do not.” He hooted.
“Yes, I do.” She bobbed her head. “Why do you think I asked you to marry me? I couldn’t risk you taking Julie away from me.”
“You really do love her, don’t you?”
Her dark eyes drilled straight into his. “You have no idea.”
“Thank God for you,” he said, emotions sprouting everywhere. “I’m so glad you were there for her when I couldn’t be.”
“Me too.”
“I can never make that up to you, Tea.”
Tara yawned, stretched. “It’s been a big day and I’m exhausted. You take the bed. I’ll stay on the chaise.”
“Tara,” he said. “I promise if we share the bed, nothing untoward will happen. Trust me.”
“Oh,” she said. “It’s not you I don’t trust. It’s me.”
That pulled him up straight. “You want something to happen?”
“I’m so hot for you I can’t stand it,” she whispered.
“It’s just the champagne talking.”
She shook her head. “No, it’s not.”
“So . . .” His hopes flickered like a flame. “Do you wanna . . . ?”
“More than anything.” She hitched in a big breath. “But we can’t.”
“Because . . . ?”
“I can’t handle it. If I ever . . . if we ever, well, I know there would be no going back.”
“Meaning?”
“I’m a one-man woman and you’re a whatever-woman-is-in-my-bed-for-the-night kind of man.”
“I never had a woman worth being faithful to before,” he said, surprised by his admission and the tight clutch of his chest.
“And you think I’m the one woman for whom you can change your ways?”
He held her gaze, didn’t blink. “I do.”
“Why?” she whispered. “Because I love your daughter?”
“That’s part of it.”
“What’s the other part?” she whispered.
“You’re gorgeous as hell.”
“Pfft.” She swatted the air as if she were waving off flies. “You’ve had hundreds of beautiful women.”
“Not hundreds.”
“Okay, dozens.”
“Forget them. You’re all that matters now.”
“But why me?”
“You hold my feet to the fire and make me a better man.”
“No one ever did that for you before?”
“My mom.” He shrugged. “But I lost that when I was eight.”
“Is that why you go through women like carnival rides? You lost your mom, and now you can’t trust anyone to have your back?”
“No one’s ever had my back before, Tara. Women just want to be with me because I’m fun, have money, and grandstand on the back of a bull. But none of that stuff impresses you. Why not?”
“Because that’s all surface stuff, Rhett. I want a man I can count on.”
“And I can’t be that guy?”
“This isn’t a love match.”
“Maybe not at first, but that doesn’t mean it can’t grow into one. It’s definitely a like match,” he said, too afraid to tell her his feelings ran far deeper than that. What if she didn’t feel the same way? “I like you. A lot. And I admire you more than I can say.”
She laughed. “That’s quite eloquent. Being a husband suits you.”
“Tara,” he said. “You’re what suits me.”
She inclined her head, her hair falling softly against her cheek. “What are we doing here, Rhett?”
“You mean at this hotel or—”
“Our goal is to get permanent custody of Julie. That’s where our focus needs to be.”
“Shouldn’t it be on creating a loving family for Julie?”
“Custody comes first.”
“Unless Rhona comes back, we’re going to get custody.”
“But that’s why we’re doing this. To make sure we get custody whether Rhona comes back or not.”
“And that’s why you and I need to make sure we’re on solid ground.”
“What are you saying?” Tara whispered.
He met her gaze, held it. “I don’t want to have any secrets from you.”
Chapter 20
Boot the bull: A term used to mean a particular bull can be spurred.
Tara bit her bottom lip. Secrets? What secrets was he keeping from her?
Rhett got up and poured another glass of champagne. Nodded at her. “Another?”
She shook her head, put her palm over the top of her glass.
He was still in his tuxedo slacks and dress shirt, the sleeves rolled up to his elbow. Such a sexy look. “Scooch over.”
She scooched, and he sat down beside her. Rested his hand on her bare knee. It felt warm and heavy. She liked it. “What secrets?” she asked.
Pausing, he met her gaze, his eyes sincere. “Don’t panic. It’s nothing terrible. It’s just something I’ve never told anyone, but I feel like I need to get it off my chest.”
“Not even your brothers?”
“Especially not them. They’re all so accomplished. Ridge is the rich ambitious one. Ranger’s the smart one. Remington is the brave one, and I was the screw-up.”
“That’s not true.”
“Yeah, it is. I was the clown. The one who would do anything on a dare. The joker . . . the joke.”
She reached out and touched his forearm, offering moral support. “That’s not the way I see you.”
He rewarded her with the most grateful look. “No?”
She smiled at him, reached up to tuck a strand of shaggy curl behind his ear. “In my eyes, you are the bold one. The quick one. The charming, confident one. The one who doesn’t let life eat up his soul. If I had to marry a Lockhart, I’m so happy it was you.”
“Considering two of your sisters are married to my brothers, I’m not sure that’s a huge compliment.” He laughed, a self-effacing sound.
“Thank you for trusting me enough to tell me what you’re about to tell me.”
His face sobered, and he set down his champagne. “Now I’m rethinking my true confessions. I’m afraid you’ll think less of me.”
“We all have things we’re ashamed of,” she murmured.
“Woman,” he said, “you’re a breath of fresh air.”
“Even with my tart tongue?”
“Oh yes. I love that tongue.”
Love. If only he loved her the way she loved him. Was it too much to hope that he could fall in love with her? Too much to wish for? But she wished it anyway.
Feet planted solidly on the floor, he spread his legs, dropped his elbows on his knees, interlaced his fingers, and rested his chin on his joined hands. He stared at the champagne glass on the coffee table in front of him.
Rhett looked so sad that Tara wanted to gather him to her chest, rock him in her arms, and tell him that everything was going to be all right. Instead, she sat quietly, waiting for him to continue. Feeling like it was something monumental he was about to reveal.
“Rhona wasn’t the only woman I got pregnant.”
The news was not startling. She’d already suspected this was the direction where his story was headed. “Your high school sweetheart?” she guessed, remembering that long-ago night in the Lockharts’ barn where they’d shared beers and broken hearts.
“Yes. I was seventeen. Brittany was sixteen. We were each other’s firsts.”
“Really?”
“You sound surprised.”
“I figured you’d lost your virginity in middle school.”
“Nope. Seventeen. Brittany Fant. And Tea, I was happy when she told me she was preggers. Scared, sure, but happy. I thought finally something that belongs to me.”
She placed two fingers over her mouth, her thumb resting against her jaw, the last two fingers curled underneath her chin. From the way he was seated, she couldn’t see his face, but she heard the pain in his voice. Saw his shoulders knot beneath his crisp white shirt.
“I wanted to marry her, have the baby. It was a stupid idea. I know that now, but at the time?” His head shook vigorously. “I couldn’t forgive her for not fighting back when her mother took her to the abortion clinic.”
“Oh, Rhett.” Tara leaned over to massage his shoulders. Her breast brushed up against his hard, sinewy muscles. “I am so sorry. You must have been devastated.”
“That’s why I dropped out of high school and went on the circuit. Those bulls kept me from losing my ever-loving mind. I pushed myself hard, probably my teenage way of punishing myself. But it paid off.” His laugh was hollow. “If I’d married Brittany, I’d probably be working as a ranch hand for my family on the Silver Feather.”
“Did you love her?”
“I thought I did.” He shrugged, turned his head, met her eyes. “But now . . . I realize it was just infatuation.”
She swallowed hard. What had that look meant? She pressed her thumbs into the knots under his skin, kneaded with the right amount of pressure.
He groaned, a feels-so-good sound that turned her on. “Tara.”
“Rhett.”
“I feel like we’re in Gone with the Wind.” He laughed.
“Frankly, my dear, I do give a damn,” she quipped. “Maybe I should have named Julie Scarlett instead. If I’d but known you were her father maybe I would have.”
“God,” he said. “You are amazing.”
“Not too shabby yourself, mister. You’ve been through the wringer and survived. You should be proud of yourself.”
“I’m just proud that you’re proud of me.” He paused, said, “Wife.”
Wife. The word so delicious and hopeful.
They stared into each other’s eyes, longing surging between them, strong as an electrical current.
“I want a real marriage,” Rhett said. “I don’t want to sleep with anyone else, and I sure as hell don’t want you to either. I want sex with you. I don’t want out of this marriage after a year. I want this to last, us to last. I want us to build a real family with Julie.”
Tara gasped. She wanted the same things but had been too afraid to voice her wishes in case he wasn’t on the same page. “What about the prenup?”
“We tear it up.” He gulped. “That is, if you feel the same way.”
“Are you sure?”
“I’ve never been more certain of anything.”
“When the buckle bunnies come knocking at your door—”
“I’ve had that life. I don’t want it anymore. I mean it. Once this season is over, whether I win the championship or not, I’m quitting the PBR.”
“What will you do for a living?”
“I’ve been giving that some thought and it occurred to me to start a bull-riding school. I think I’d be pretty good at it.”
“You’d be brilliant at it,” she said. “You should do it.”
“Does that mean you’ll come along for the ride?” His smile was tight, fearful. She could read his expression. He’d gone out on a limb and was terrified she’d saw it off.
“It would be the greatest honor of my life.”
The next thing she knew, she was in his arms, and he was kissing her like happily-ever-after in some romantic movie, and her head was filled with the sound of a million bees humming.
The One. The One. The One.
“Rhett.” Tara murmured his name low and sultry, her thick, dark hair falling straight to the middle of her back, shimmering in the light from wall sconces on either side of the bed. Her lashes lowered seductively over those alluring chestnut eyes, so sophisticated, and yet simultaneously so winningly naive.
Was this the right time? They’d had a lot of champagne. Emotions were running high. Maybe he should give her some time to think about this before they did something that could not be erased.
Tilting her head, she examined him in that clinical way of hers, a hint of a smile brushing the corners of her mouth.
Sonofagun, but he was a lucky man.
She unstitched him in a way no other woman had, and he’d been with a lot of women. She could completely dismantle him with one of her long, lingering looks.
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br /> He burned for her. In every corner of his body, every nook, every cranny, he ached for her. But his blazing sex drive was not what scared him.
Lust, he could deal with. But these feelings blistering through him? They were much bigger than simple desire. This woman, above all others, possessed the ability to hurl him over the cliff of madness. He was that hot for her.
That much in love with her.
He was terrified that she did not feel the same way. That she was agreeing to this because she loved Julie, not him so much.
Her scent was in the air. A womanly fragrance that drove him wild. Her body heat. She could have doubled as a radiant heater.
Tara touched him. One fingertip. On his chin.
That was all it took for Rhett to get harder than he had in his entire life. His erection throbbed painfully against his zipper.
A groan tore from his mouth, so rough and feral, it shocked him. Please don’t let her change her mind now. He didn’t think he could survive another night without being inside her.
“Are you sure?” His voice was a raspy croak. “Are you sure this is what you want?”
In answer, she leaned in and flicked her hot, wet tongue over his lips.
He inhaled so sharply that he couldn’t immediately exhale. His breath was trapped in a nether land of hope and suspense. What was coming next?
For weeks he’d been dreaming of a moment just like this. The two of them all alone and eager for each other. He hadn’t been with anyone since he’d walked into her duplex. He’d told himself it was because of Julie. But he’d been lying. Tara was the reason he hadn’t invited any of those eager buckle bunnies back to his trailer. He hadn’t been the slightest bit interested. Those girls all seemed vapid and silly now. Immature and impulsive. Just like he’d been.
He was ready for something more. Something bigger. Something long-term and meaningful. He was ready to be a husband. And that realization made him laugh.
“What’s so funny?” she whispered. “Let me in on the joke.”
“No joke,” he said. “I’m just so damn happy to be here with you that I can’t contain myself. I want to laugh and laugh and laugh.”
“Me too.” Her eyes were soft, but her fingers were quick. Working the buttons of his shirt, nimble as a spider. One second his shirt was buttoned to the top, the next second it was drifting to the floor behind him.