by Marc Aight
I was happy for the blow job pictures, but unhappy that I didn’t fucked her
So I returned home after I paid Waan. I felt like a hunter who was eager to consume his pray. I went home and looked at the pictures. They were great. I masturbated like the night before and the next day, I was happy and disappointed as well. I was happy for the blow job pictures, but disappointed not to have fucked her. She was so gorgeous and would have been a great fuck, but the chance was gone. I didn’t know if I will meet her again at the Beach Promenade. Many of the women I saw this night, I knew from the night before. But many also have been new. I also was looking for Malee, but couldn’t find her or her girlfriend. Maybe they were with another customer, or maybe they didn’t return this night. There seemed to be a frequent exchange. To make a long story short, I couldn’t find Waan or Malee the next night at the Beach Promenade. At least when I was there, neither of them was there.
Kanya, this time I got what I wanted
I was walking down the entire road searching for them, but couldn’t find them. I looked for them and also asked the ladies in my usual manner if they are open for pictures. Again, it was a challenge, but finally I met Kanya. When I saw her, she was just talking to an old guy. But it seems as they couldn’t make a deal. I don’t know why, but I thought that it will be unsuccessful for me too. But somehow, it was different with me. She liked me, I could see this. She was happy to agree and we went again to the hourly hotel. I shot her stripping, I shot her naked, I filmed her taking off her cloth, I shot her pussy, I filmed her posing and then I took off my cloth and she kissed my penis. This time I stopped her before I got too excited. I put on a condom so she could blow my dick entirely and then I fucked her doggy style. It was great, but I was coming soon again. But this time, at least I was not disappointed. I had what I wanted. Happily I went home and there I was horny enough again to masturbate. I totally forgot my past and the trouble I had before I came to Pattaya.
As long I masturbated I felt good
I spent the next day masturbating on the pictures and short movies I made from Malee, Waan and Kanya. I tried to avoid coming. I was even scared to come, because I knew when I came, the bad memories from my past would come back. But as long I jerked off, I felt good. This was what I needed most -to feel good. I had the idea that whenever I felt good, my soul could heal. I could heal and maybe one day overcome my bad memories. But even if I wouldn’t heal, it would be still better to masturbate and feel good than face my depressions again. So I spent my day watching nude and porn pictures that I made by myself. Once they got boring, I downloaded new porn pictures from the internet. As also they got boring, I purchased the membership of a porn site and downloaded better pictures and movies. The site I purchased the membership of, was the same page I downloaded most of the free pictures before. It was a Thai Porn site that showed Thai ladies fucked by white males. For me, this was a new world and I was interested in discovering it.
Dong
Once it got dark, I took a rest and then went out for dinner. But I couldn’t wait to go for my next hunt. This time I stopped at a night club next to my hotel. I just wanted to have a drink. As soon I got my beer, a nice and young Thai woman asked me to sit next to her. She looked cool and was already very drunk. I had 2 beers and also paid her a lady drink. Once you pay the drink, you can play with her body. I already learned that the other nights. So I started already to touch her breasts, ass and later her legs and pussy. She didn’t mind at all and massaged my penis in my trousers. Everybody could watch, but most man had a girl too. They were busy with their own girl and so didn’t care about us. Only once I was fingering that girl, they started to look. I thought that it was enough and wanted to stop, but the girl was ready for more. Her name was Dong and she asked me to bring her to my room and I asked her if it is O.K. to make photos? Luckily she accepted immediately. I was very happy, as I thought it is very easy in that bar and maybe I could pick up the other girls the other night.
I filmed her in the bathroom
At my room, a funny situation happened. Dang wanted to use my bathroom. I wanted to start as early as possible to make pictures. So once she disappeared in my bathroom I went to the bed room part of my studio. I knew that there was a window between bedroom and bathroom, so it was possible to watch whatever was going on in the bath room. So I filmed Dong how she slipped off her underwear and sat down on the toilet to have a piss. Then she looked around and saw the window to the bed room, where I was standing filming her. A loud scream came out of the bathroom. I had to laugh, but she was really shocked. She stood up and got her pussy covered with her underwear. I stopped filming and showed her how to cover the large bathroom window with a curtain, so she could enjoy her piss.
I was disappointed that I couldn’t make photos
But that was all the fun I had that night. Most of the other things went wrong. Once she returned from the bathroom, she didn’t want to make any pictures anymore. No nude pictures and no porn pictures at all. She seems not to remember that she agreed to it. As I already paid her bar fine and her fee, I was angry too. After some bad discussions, we agreed that I could fuck her twice to get at least some of the service I paid for. It was O.K., but not what I wanted. After she left, my penis was really down and I had no interest in sex anymore. My depressions came back. Again I had to think about all the things I wanted to forget. But this time it was worse. The bad experience I made with the girl, made me feel even worse. Everything could be ending in seconds, I thought. If I just would drop my fat body over the balcony. I felt like I already lived too long. At least long enough and I did what I had to do and I experienced enough in my life. Most of all, I experienced a lot of shit in my life. That’s how I felt. Like a piece of shit that already lived too long. This night seemed to be endless and only in the early morning I was exhausted enough that I could sleep.
Rune
The next day I felt terrible. I had not gotten enough sleep and the depressions were back. I was helpless against them and didn’t know how to deal with them. It took until the early afternoon before the idea of masturbation came to my mind again. I felt no need for sex, but ignored it and tried to watch the movies from that Thai Porn Website I bought. It took a while until I got horny, but once I was hard, I felt much better. I focused on the women that got fucked and minute by minute I became better. By dinner time, I was O.K. I was strong enough for another hunt. This time I choose my old pilotage area - the Beach Promenade. It went really well. After a couple of minutes, I found a girl for a blow job. She said she had no problem to get filmed. We went to the hourly hotel. It was the same like the other nights.
I filmed her blowing me
I made only a few picture of her, before I filmed her sucking my dick. I could film her face and how she sucked with her mouth. I came quickly and realized immediately that I still was not strong enough for real sex. I came so quickly, that it was a pity. But worse was that I was overwhelmed by a strong tiredness. I went to the hotel, but already on the way back I realized that this tiredness increased my depressions. My depressions followed me everywhere and whenever I got weak, they took control of me. They were here to punish me. To punish me for what happened or to punish me for having lived too long. I felt it was time. I have lived my life. I had enough and it was time to realize that I had to leave this planet. The earlier the better. I lost my right to be on this planet and actually that was not a punishment at all. It was a gift to leave. To leave this fucking world. Bombarded by those thoughts, I let my body asleep. I prayed to God that I would die that night. I had no idea what should be the reason. I simply asked him to let me die. Let my heart stand still- my fat heart. I knew I was too fat anyway. Can’t this be the reason? Just let my fat heart stop beating and everything is over - once and for all. But God hated me. Not even this fucking wish could be fulfilled by him. Same like all the fucking wishes I made last year. God stopped listening to me.
Sroy
The next day I felt bad, but at least not tired
anymore. I didn’t expect anything for the day and just turned on my laptop to get some release, at least for some hours. Hours passed and before I realized it, it was night. I watched porn the entire day and masturbated most of the time. I am sick and perverted. But at least I don’t feel like shit. I feel O.K. and something inside me pushes me to night life. I started drinking and ended up in a go-go bar pretty drunk. I paid the bar fine for a girl and together we went to my hotel. The girl was strong enough and helped me most of the way, so that I didn’t end up falling.
A quick blow job
At the hotel I remember the pictures and get pissed about myself. I forgot to ask the girl if I could make photographs of her. I tried it now, but it was too late. She somehow would accept it, but only for extra pay. But I don’t feel like paying more. We shower and I let her suck my dick. After a view seconds, I come already. Even the girl is shocked that it happened so quickly. But I have one more shot anyway. We wait till I get hard, but it takes some time. She gets nervous and finally suggests that I can make some pictures of her, instead of the second time sex. I agree and shoot some nude pictures of the lady and as I am pretty drunk I go to bed as soon as she leaves. The next morning, a very bad headache appears. I tried to stay in bed and cure it. But it is only slowly getting better.
A bad hangover
I think about the pictures of the last night and think that maybe it would help to masturbate on the pictures. Masturbation seems to be good against depression, so why shouldn’t it help against headache. I transfer the pictures from my camera to my laptop and start massaging my penis. Slowly I do feel a little bit better. The headache is still there, but my hard penis gives me a warm feeling. Suddenly I noticed something strange on the pictures. The girl’s face looks strange. Her body is fine, but her face not. Something is wrong here. She looks too masculine. Yes, like a man. I get really shocked. Was she a man? That can’t be as she had no penis. First, I thought that I didn’t know it as she just blew me. But then I thought about the pictures. I shot her pussy. I rush to the other pictures on my laptop. Quickly, I flip through the pictures until I get to the first pictures where she is naked. Nervously, I go through the pictures. No penis- there is no penis. I zoom to her pussy and there is a pussy, but her face looks somehow like a man who tries to look like a woman. Could she be a lady boy? Then she would have to have a penis. Could it be that she was operated and had a penis once? Then a doctor came and removed the penis. But maybe that is wrong either. Maybe it was a girl that just looked masculine. I have no idea, but it feels strange – very strange.
Fat Man in Asia continues with “How I met my slutty girlfriend”
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