by Erin Butler
She leaned against the wall and smiled. “Do not worry yourself, Mr. Darcy. I am well.”
“Good night, Miss Bennet.”
“Good night, Mr. Darcy.”
Chapter Eleven
The next day brought a worrisome sound and even more unfortunate event. Though Elizabeth had written her mother several times to keep her up to date on her sister’s progress, Mrs. Bennet had insisted on visiting Netherfield to see for herself. That she should choose the day after the awkward interaction between the party last night was just unlucky.
She first heard her mother’s voice while she was in Jane’s room tending to her. She was whispering to someone else in her presence on what a lovely staircase Netherfield had and she was sure it would do quite well for Jane. Elizabeth was horrified until she answered the door and found that Kitty and Lydia accompanied her mother. She was still distressed that someone else might have heard such a thing, but at least it was not as egregious as she thought.
Her mother and her two sisters stayed with Jane and Elizabeth in the room for above a half an hour before deciding that Jane was well though Elizabeth was unsure how her mother could have ascertained such a thing for she never once asked Jane how she felt. All she could speak of was the size of the hall, the beautiful park that surrounded Netherfield, and how handsome Mr. Bingley was. When Mrs. Bennet declared her resolution to sit for a time with the rest of the house, Elizabeth’s heart sped. She did not want her mother to slip and say something she should not.
Elizabeth reluctantly led her downstairs and watched as the party welcomed her. None but Mr. Bingley seemed as if they truly meant it. “Welcome, Mrs. Bennet. I hope you find that your daughter is doing quite better than you thought. I believe Miss Elizabeth has been a great nurse to her.”
“She suffers a great deal, Mr. Bingley, but since she has the best constitution in all the world, she does it with so little bother to anyone else. She is a dear creature; would not you agree?”
Elizabeth stepped forward. “If you would have seen her when I first came, Mamma, I am sure you would agree with Mr. Bingley. She is much better than she was, I assure you.”
“Whatever you say, though you are not a doctor, Elizabeth, and you should not always fancy yourself one.”
Elizabeth closed her eyes and swallowed, wishing this whole scene to be soon over with. “Have you seen Charlotte Lucas since I came away?”
“She has visited. Now that Sir Lucas is my idea of a gentleman. So kind, so amiable, I am sure no one would disagree. With such amiable neighbors, and a place to stay such as Netherfield, I hope you will not think of quitting this place in a hurry, though you have but a short lease.”
“Whatever I do is done in a hurry,” replied he. “And therefore, if I should resolve to quit Netherfield, I should probably be off in five minutes. At present, however, I consider myself as quite fixed here.” He gave a smile toward Elizabeth and she returned it.
“I am happy to hear it, Sir,” said Mrs. Bennet. “When Jane is better, I should hope to have you over for dinner. Perhaps we shall have a large party there so you can meet more people in the neighborhood. I will have you know we dine with four and twenty families.”
Elizabeth noticed the amused look on Miss Bingley’s face, and her glance toward Mr. Darcy. She wished her mother would stop talking for she did not even know she was being made fun of.
“In a country neighborhood,” said Darcy, “you move in a very confined and unvarying society.”
“We do not indeed,” cried Mrs. Bennet, offended by his manner of mentioning a country neighborhood. “I assure you there is quite as much going on in the country as in town.”
Everybody was surprised. Darcy, after looking at her for a moment, turned silently away. Mrs. Bennet who fancied she had gained a complete victory over him, continued her triumph. “I cannot see that London has any great advantage over the country for my part, except the shops and public places. The country is a vast deal pleasanter, is not it, Mr. Bingley?”
“When I am in the country,” he replied, “I never wish to leave it; and when I am in town, it is pretty much the same. They have each their advantages, and I can be equally happy in either.”
“Aye, that is because you have the right disposition. But that gentleman,” looking at Darcy, Miss Bennet said, “seemed to think the country was nothing at all.”
“Indeed, Mamma, you are mistaken,” said Elizabeth, blushing for her mother and trying to quell the argument. “You quite mistook Mr. Darcy. He only meant that there were not such a variety of people to be met with in the country as in town, which you must acknowledge to be true.”
The general pause which ensued made Elizabeth tremble lest her mother should be exposing herself again. She longed to speak, but could think of nothing to say, and after a short silence Mrs. Bennet began repeating her thanks to Mr. Bingley for his kindness to Jane with an apology for troubling him also with her other daughter. Mr. Bingley was unaffectedly civil in his answer, and forced his younger sister to be civil also, and say what the occasion required. She performed her part, indeed, without much graciousness, but Mrs. Bennet was satisfied, and soon afterward ordered her carriage.
Elizabeth was happy to have the whole affair over though she did not know how she would face them all again. Her mother often spoke things that should not be said. She was sure her face would be scarlet for a month after that ordeal. How abominably rude to Mr. Darcy she had been. She was sure her mother felt herself right in treating him in such a manner due to his behavior at the assembly, but she was wrong. If she only knew the reason behind Mr. Darcy’s behavior.
Eager to be out of the house so she would not hear any whisperings about her mother’s appearance, she left to take a walk. She knew her mother was often too outspoken, and with not much in the way of sense behind her words. It was a shameful thing to think of your mother, but Elizabeth could not help but feel it to be true. The most recent scene was proof. Mrs. Bennet did not understand Mr. Darcy and verbally bludgeoned him because of it. Heat threatened behind Elizabeth’s eyes. How was this to change what Mr. Bingley thought of Jane? Or perhaps even what Mr. Darcy thought of her? Surely Miss Bingley and Mrs. Hurst would use this experience as a way to talk Mr. Bingley out of his affections for her sister. The embarrassment was too much to bear.
Elizabeth sat on a bench and breathed in deep a few times trying to settle her wild thoughts. She was too intent on calming herself that she did not hear Mr. Darcy coming toward her. His mind must have also been otherwise engaged for when he first saw her, he looked as if he wanted to turn around. Before he could get away, Elizabeth stood. “Mr. Darcy, please. I am so sorry for my mother’s behavior, and I know I should not say such a thing, but it was plain for everybody what her behavior was earlier. I hope she did not leave you with too bad of an opinion.”
Mr. Darcy’s jaw ticked. He looked unsure of how he should conduct himself after such a statement. It was wrong for Elizabeth to attack her mother, but was not it also wrong to act as if something had not happened when it did? It showed good sense that Elizabeth could see her mother in such a light.
Mr. Darcy looked away from her. “I am sorry that the whole thing should have taken place, Miss Bennet.”
“I agree.” Knowing there was a thin line between disobedience and good sense, Elizabeth could not help but say the next thing that came to her mind. “I hope I do not need to say that all my family is not like that, and even my mother can be amiable when she wants to be. I have no other apology to give on the matter and I hope we may not have to speak on the topic again.”
Feeling satisfied, Elizabeth sat back down on the bench.
Mr. Darcy did not move. The next few moments passed slowly for Elizabeth as she waited for him to do something. Finally, he said, “It is unfortunate, Miss Bennet. I know you understand this so I feel free in saying it. The lack of propriety is alarming. It does you and your sister great credit to rise above it.”
Elizabeth did not know what she
expected Mr. Darcy to say, but that must have not been it. If he were to disagree with her, she would have thought him a fool. But that she agreed with her statement, may have hurt worse still. She only nodded and Mr. Darcy slipped away, letting her think on the subject alone.
Chapter Twelve
After imparting only a portion of the exchange between their mother and the party at Netherfield to Jane, Elizabeth told her sister she wished to leave as soon as Jane felt well enough for the journey. She kept Mr. Darcy’s words a secret. She did not believe she would ever tell anyone of what transpired between them. It caused her too much pain to even think of it now.
When Elizabeth declared to her sister she was also not going down to dinner, Jane’s suspicions were raised. “What has happened, Lizzy? Surely you do not mean that you will not go to dinner. I am quite well so there is no reason there to stop you. I am sitting up even. Tomorrow I will be in an even better way and will perhaps be able to leave this room.”
“I would rather your company tonight, Jane. That is all.”
“It will be rude to stay up here when you are perfectly well. You would not want us laughed out of here, would you?”
Elizabeth’s fingers trembled. Jane was right. To add to the atrocities mounting against her family, she could not yet add one more in refusing to dine with the rest of them. Perhaps if she had an excuse… No, that would never do. Elizabeth sighed and resigned herself to face the party downstairs. She dressed herself and calmed her churning belly with soothing thoughts as she descended the stairs.
She was not halfway down when she heard two voices speaking in the hall. “That mother!” Caroline cried. “Jane is a dear, sweet girl, but with such relations as those, it is doubtful that she will be able to marry well.”
Miss Bingley’s companion made a sound of acknowledgment. It was a man. How unlucky. Elizabeth had hoped it was just Louisa and Caroline talking of them again.
“And I had heard from Jane before she fell ill that her uncle resides in London, in Cheapside. That is capital, is it not?”
“Such low connections.” And there, Elizabeth knew the voice well. It was Mr. Darcy who joined in on the conversation to make sport with her relations.
Elizabeth straightened her shoulders and descended the stairs with a renewed sense of self. “Miss Bingley, Mr. Darcy, is supper not ready yet? I had thought I was late.”
Mr. Darcy at least had the sense to look embarrassed while Miss Bingley walked toward the dining room with her chin high in the air. Though dinner was awkward, Elizabeth had turned it into a kind of game. She completely ignored every attempt of Mr. Darcy’s to catch her eye or engross her in conversation, and with Miss Bingley, she disagreed with her in the most amiable way possible. For when Miss Bingley declared that she liked duck, Elizabeth agreed that though duck was a delicious dish, it lacked the savory taste of chicken.
Such the game went with every topic brought forth. Miss Bingley spoke of the portrait she was drawing and Elizabeth ruminated that landscapes were quite a deal harder to figure out and that Miss Bingley had ought to try that. When Miss Bingley spoke of walking as the best form of exercise, Elizabeth agreed, but said some type of vigorous exercise should be employed each day for a better state of health. By the end of the meal, Elizabeth was pleased to see that Caroline Bingley had lost her usual spirit and looked as if she wanted to hit Elizabeth.
Using her sister as an excuse, Elizabeth begged off the offer to retire to the drawing room. She wished them all a good night and was just about to step on the first stair when Mr. Darcy cleared his throat behind her. She turned around and smiled. “Mr. Darcy, how did you find dinner? I found it quite entertaining.”
“It is obvious you have overheard a private discussion. I apologize, Miss Bennet. I would never wish to harm you.”
Elizabeth smiled. “I assure you I have overheard nothing of the sort. Enjoy your evening, Sir, I hope. I am sure I will.”
She turned and ascended the stairs with a smile plastered on her face. It was not until she had checked on Jane and readied herself for bed that she felt the true shame of her actions. She had not acted in any way different than Miss Bingley did to her on occasion, but it was far less favorable than she imagined it to be. Instead of satisfaction, she felt a most assured guilt. Though they deserved it, she should never have behaved in such a way.
She stood from the bed and quickly made Mr. Darcy his usual salve to try to make amends. After thinking back, he did not say anything so cruel as she did. She hoped Mr. Bingley had a hearty constitution and was not easily swayed by his friends’ opinions when it came to matters of the heart. How sad Jane would be if she was not to get Mr. Bingley after all.
Elizabeth mixed the salve together in a jar and then grabbed a piece of paper and ink. In a small note, she wrote, I accept your apology.
Sometime later, Elizabeth was still awake when she heard Mr. Darcy pass by her door for the salve. He did not whisper to her as he did the other night. He merely stopped momentarily and then walked away. Elizabeth closed her eyes and tried not to despair though she felt she would most likely not get any sleep tonight. Her mind was too preoccupied with events that were out of her control.
Chapter Thirteen
Elizabeth woke in a little better spirits. After finding Jane sitting up in bed and looking quite recovered, she was even better still. She declared to Jane that she wished to leave Netherfield immediately and that she begged Jane would ask Mr. Bingley for the carriage. Knowing enough of her sister’s temperament not to ask questions when she acted thusly, Jane agreed to the scheme, but insisted they stay for breakfast where she could ask for the carriage and express her thanks in having her stay at Netherfield while she recovered.
Mr. Bingley was all smiles as Jane accompanied Elizabeth into the dining room. Even Miss Bingley and Mrs. Hurst looked much more amiable in her presence. Elizabeth, on design, paid too much attention to her food to discern how Mr. Darcy felt this morning. She thought she could feel his stare upon her, but nothing he did would make her want to meet his eyes this morning.
Jane, as discussed, asked Mr. Bingley for the carriage who exclaimed that it was not right for her to leave so early. “What if you should fall ill again with the travel?”
“Elizabeth assures me I shall be fine. You have already been so kind. I wish not to trespass on you any longer.”
Mr. Bingley, looking toward his sister for help in expressing a desire for Jane to stay, did just the opposite. She declared, “I do not think the travel should do her any harm, Charles. Look at her today. She is recovered.”
“Thanks to her sister,” Mr. Darcy said.
They all agreed, some more heartily than others.
Elizabeth, still, did not look up.
Breakfast passed too slowly for Elizabeth, however, she wanted Jane to have this time with Mr. Bingley. Maybe there was still a chance yet that she might overpower whatever his sister had tried to tell him yesterday. Despite the attempts of Miss Bingley, the party lingered in the dining room much longer than normal. It was only after Mr. Bingley declared that he would soon see Miss Bennet again that all felt safe in departing from the other. The carriage was called for and Jane and Elizabeth went upstairs to pack their belongings.
“I am sorry, Jane. I would have you stay if I could.”
Jane gave a small smile. “You are right in requesting that we leave. We do not wish to be a burden on them. It is better to leave with good impressions than bad.”
Elizabeth struggled inwardly whether she should tell her sister of the way she acted the previous night. She found she could not do so though. It was abhorrent, and she did not want to own up to the fact she let Miss Bingley get under her skin like that.
The servants came and got the bags downstairs and loaded into the carriage. Elizabeth watched as Mr. Bingley and her sister said goodbye. It was touching the way he promised to see her very soon. She felt her sister’s joy upon hearing such a statement. Mr. Darcy had also come to see them off and stay
ed longer than Bingley’s sisters. “I am sorry to see you go,” Mr. Darcy said to Elizabeth.
“It is for the best, I am afraid,” Elizabeth said. She looked into his eyes and for the first time, also felt sadness for their departure. She had enjoyed Mr. Darcy’s company very much. Not until this moment had she realized that their conversations had truly been a pleasure to her, and one she did not often get at Longbourn. “Though I am sorry, too,” she added. “I believe I have already heard Mr. Bingley promise he will ask after Jane within a couple days. I hope I do not have to tell you it would not be wise to ride your horse at present. I do not wish for you to re-injure—”
“—my leg. Yes, of course. Miss Bennet…” He paused and stared at her with such passion. “I do hope that we will meet again soon.”
Elizabeth curtsied and within a few moments, they were settled in the carriage and already halfway down the drive away from Netherfield. Jane was still waving goodbye to Mr. Bingley, and Elizabeth, overwhelmed by sadness, let the emotion flow through her as she settled her head back against the seat.
Just yesterday she may have said she could not wait to leave the place, and perhaps that was still right. However, there was one person who she did not wish to leave—Mr. Darcy. She could see her expression mirrored in her sister’s as she waited until she could not see Mr. Bingley any longer before turning around.
Elizabeth grasped her hand and squeezed. As thoughts and conversation started to turn toward Longbourn, the carriage upheaved and tilted drastically to one side. Elizabeth and Jane clasped each other for support. Heart beating like mad, Elizabeth opened her eyes to see that although the carriage was surely broke in some way, nothing was too amiss.
The driver hollered to inquire after their health and Elizabeth, after making sure Jane was clear, told him they were well. The door thrust open and a hand shot through. “Out with you now, then. Problem with the wheel. I have already sent someone back.”