"This most sensitive information, however, has provided me with much greater insights into the workings of your mind. I for one see every inch of my sister in you. Granted, she was a renowned beauty and you are not, but you are just like her, a pleasure-seeking fool who basks in male attention. She was lucky to secure the affections of such an honourable man as your father so early in her first season, or I fear she might have been involved in a scandal and brought disgrace to the family."
Fury turned to sadness. I had never heard anyone speak of my mother in those terms. My eyes welled up and I bit the inside of my mouth to avoid the inevitable, but it was of little use, and soon tears were streaming down my cheeks.
Lady Catherine seemed to mellow a little when she saw me cry and gave me a little pat with her liver-spotted hand.
"Now, now, there are other ways to marry you off to a man of honour with wonderful family connections without risking your virtue. You are bright enough, and I am sure you will eventually come to understand the convenience of the arrangement to all parties involved, but for now, I must not say another word. I promised your cousin that I would not talk about it until your brother has been made aware of the situation. He will need to give his consent, of course, but that should not be a problem."
Her lips were pursed into what may or may not have been a smile. A gold spring was visible in the corner of her mouth. I shuddered inwardly but tried to betray no emotion. The plans of my aunt and my cousin were slowly becoming sharper, more defined, but I still could not face their implications. All I could think was that I wanted to wake up from the living nightmare I was experiencing, where every shred of self-determination was being taken away from me. I left my aunt and went up to my room to cry my heart out.
At dinner time, I was anxious to see that there was just Colonel Fitzwilliam and myself seated at the table. I timidly asked him if there had been any news from Pemberley, as I had not received any letters from my usual correspondents for three days now, but my cousin brushed my worries aside, mumbling that no news usually meant good news. Then, he brusquely changed the subject.
"I have to go to Brighton for a couple of nights. I will be back on Sunday."
His words shattered the little hope I had that he might change his mind at the last minute and agree to escort me to the Wentworths' party. Nevertheless, what hurt me the most was the implication that, while it was perfectly satisfactory for me to remain trapped at my aunt's all weekend, he was entitled to escape to the pleasures of Brighton, without even considering that someone might question his decision.
Colonel Fitzwilliam took a a sip of wine and gently patted his lips with his napkin.
"So, dear Georgiana, how was Lady Catherine feeling today when you went to see her?"
"She appeared weaker than usual, but in good enough spirits."
My cousin gave me a cautious look.
"I stopped to visit Dr Broughton on my way back from town. We have agreed that if her situation does not improve in the next few days, we will recommend her to return to Rosings as soon as she is able to travel.”
The words were left unsaid, but we both knew the main consequence of Lady Catherine's leaving Grosvenor Square. With no formal chaperone to accompany me, no friends or acquaintances would do: I would have to go back to Pemberley.
My cousin was looking at me as if to check my reaction. I thought of my brother, Elizabeth, little Will and the baby that, God willing, would be born any minute. My heart swelled. I loved them so much. But as much as I adored the family home, it was no longer my own. My aunt had said as much. I had to find my place, and time was running out. It took all of my willpower to remain suitably composed.
"As you think best, Cousin."
His features softened, and he smiled. He was not a handsome man, but as Lady Catherine had said, he could be very charming. In the past, the Colonel had always been very kind to me, and had expressed his affection infinitely better than my brother; the Darcy reserve that I shared with Fitzwilliam didn't run on my cousin's side of the family. Nevertheless, the last few days had brought a change in his disposition towards me which had dramatically altered his behaviour, in a state of affairs I was not enjoying.
As if to exemplify this shift, Colonel Fitzwilliam took my hand to his lips, and this time he planted on it a moist kiss, a lover's kiss. I blushed violently.
"You are always so charming, dear Georgiana. The very essence of female modesty. You will be a great mistress of Rosings Park one day. The retired country life will no doubt suit you better than the foul London air."
I considered his words, remembering what my aunt had announced on the day of my arrival. I did have a home, after all. Rosings was a handsome building of relatively recent construction, with a great number of windows, in accordance with the new style for edifices of consequence, and no expense had been spared in furnishing the drawing rooms. It wasn't to my taste, but curtains, chimney breasts and wallpaper can always be changed. Still, I was unable to compare it favourably to my beloved Pemberley. My aunt's property was pleasant, but it was so different from Pemberley, so lacking in comparison that I could not think of it as home, or believe that one day I would see it as such. The noble landscape, the woody hills raw in their natural beauty, the lush grounds in the naturalistic style so painstakingly looked after by the Pemberley gardeners were to me infinitely more beautiful than the formal adornments so favoured by Lady Catherine.
However, I was alone in my relative indifference towards Rosings Park. My cousin's eyes lit up at the mention of my aunt's estate, and he seemed eager to discuss its many advantages. I dropped my gaze and stifled a yawn. Colonel Fitzwilliam caught my drift immediately, perhaps keen himself to finish our exchange.
"But I see you are tired, dear Cousin. Pray, retire for the evening if you so wish."
With that, he came over to my chair, offered me his arm, walked me to the bottom of the staircase, and if I had not insisted otherwise, I am sure he would have handed me to Jones herself. He watched me climb the stairs, his hand on the bannister like an adoring Romeo bidding goodnight to his Juliet.
Chapter 18
The following afternoon, when I arrived at Grosvenor Square after a walk in the park with Jones, I was astonished to see my brother's hat on a chair in the entrance hall. The footman came at once to inform me that he was in the second drawing room. With trembling hands, I removed my bonnet, gloves and shawl, and opened the door.
He was sitting in an armchair by the window reading the newspaper, a silver tray with tea things and some fruit cake neatly placed on a small table in front of him. As soon as he saw me, he stood up and came to greet me. My head was spinning.
"What news of Elizabeth?” I cried out, unable to swallow down my panic. “Why are you not with her? Has anything happened?"
He looked at me, his eyes tired but unusually animated, his lips slowly drawing a hint of a smile, and I immediately knew she was well.
“Georgiana, I am delighted to inform you that you are the aunt to another bonny little boy. We have named him Charles. He was born four days ago, and both he and his mother are in good health."
Relief invaded my body, but the feeling was quickly replaced by another concern.
"And Will, is he well?"
"Very well. He is delighted with all the attention he has been getting. Everyone else is fine, as well, so you need not concern yourself."
My brother proceeded to update me on the Pemberley estate. Spring was in full bloom, the trees thick with leaves and flowers, the deer herd proud of their new calves, the fields alive with the bright green that comes with the good weather. His love of the family lands, even if for him they went hand in hand with duty, was second only to his affection for his family. The way he kept pressing the neatly folded newspaper in front of him, however, told me that something was troubling him. I wondered if it was the issue with the estate boundaries the Colonel had mentioned before I left Pemberley, but in the course of the conversation, Fitzwilliam confirmed it was o
n the verge of resolution.
My curiosity increased. If all was fine, if there was no news, good or bad, to report, and estate concerns, big or small, to resolve, why was my brother in London when his wife had just been delivered of an infant? Perhaps he had come to escort me back to Pemberley, although the Colonel was perfectly able to do so. I probed again.
“Colonel Fitzwilliam has been in touch about a most sensitive issue," he said after a brief silence. "He and our aunt seem to perfectly agree on an undertaking that concerns me greatly, and I wanted to discuss it with them at the earliest convenience. I was reluctant to come so soon after the birth, but Mrs Darcy insisted."
At the mention of his wife, my brother's features softened for an instant, but they quickly regained his usual seriousness.
"I was able to speak to Lady Catherine upon my arrival, but as you know, the Colonel is away until tomorrow. I suppose that he didn't expect me to come at all, or certainly not quite so soon."
He clenched his jaw, and his eyes avoided mine for a fleeting second. It was confirmation that the matter he was worried about somehow concerned me. However, he would not give me any more particulars on the matter and instead asked me about my time in London so far. I told him about the social engagements I had attended prior to Lady Catherine's illness and the new friends I had made along the way. I found myself mentioning Captain Wentworth and Mrs Wentworth a few times.
"Wentworth. Is that not the name on one of the invites arranged on the console table by the entrance?"
So he had seen it. Just as my aunt had instructed upon my arrival at Grosvenor Square, I had put the card right next to all of the other ones, on the carved console table in the hallway, which was the most visible spot for those calling. According to Lady Catherine, a carefully curated display of visitor cards and invites was the best way to communicate one's standing in society to any visitor to the house. Fitzwilliam must have seen the note from the Wentworths upon his arrival. I nodded.
"Captain Wentworth and Mrs Wentworth kindly invited Colonel Fitzwilliam and myself to dinner tonight, but at the request of the Colonel I had to decline."
I considered mentioning my dissatisfaction at his decision that I should not attend but the most pressing of social engagements, but I couldn't bring myself to censure the opinions of my other guardian. Fitzwilliam noticed my hesitation.
"Georgiana, your old brother knows you well enough to think that you would rather enjoy this particular engagement," he added, after some consideration.
I blushed.
"I would! Such pleasant company, and it is but a few streets from here. However, it is not to be.”
I looked down to the floor. The design of the grand Turkish carpet that covered it was quickly dissolving into a blurry kaleidoscope of colours.
"Do you not think that the Wentworths might be amenable to accommodating a slight change of plans, even if it didn't include your original escort?" asked my brother in a gentle voice.
I glanced up. Fitzwilliam's eyes were smiling in my direction.
"I'm afraid I do not understand."
"I would be delighted to make their acquaintance. It may be too late for tonight's dinner party, but we can issue our own invitation if you so wish. Unless your friendship with Mrs Wentworth is intimate enough to allow for such an irregular reversal of your original answer, that is."
My heart swelled.
"Oh, Fitzwilliam! Mrs Wentworth will be delighted to have us! If I say to them that you are in town you can be sure that meeting you will please them exceedingly."
“They must be worthy of the greatest respect and admiration if they have become such dear friends to you in such a short time."
I did not embrace him to express my gratitude because it had never been our way, but our exchange of affectionate looks and smiles was enough. I immediately sent for paper and quill, penned a short note for Mrs Wentworth and dispatched a messenger to Cavendish Square Gardens. She would be happy to have us amongst her guests; I had no doubt about it.
I had a very enjoyable lunch with my brother, who regaled me with little Will's most recent exploits. The cherubic and adventurous toddler, who was the spitting image of his father and had the vivaciousness of his mother, had become very fond of Mr Bennet.
"His grandfather captivates him with tales about engineering feats and historical events. They are an odd couple, but their affection is mutual. I suppose Mr Bennet never had the chance to instruct a son of his own, although Mrs Darcy must have been a perfectly adequate substitute at times."
We exchanged a knowing look. The desired male heir had never arrived for Mr Bennet, but he had enjoyed the company of an equally gifted, eloquent and witty mind under his roof in his second daughter.
After the meal, we retired to the drawing room, and the conversation took a rather disconcerting turn. After some minutes of silence, during which Fitzwilliam looked at me with an unreadable expression in his eyes, he took a deep breath and addressed me with a grave air.
"Georgiana, there is a delicate matter I would like to discuss with you. As you will be much aware, at your age it is generally accepted that a lady might start considering marriage. Lady Catherine has certainly made no secret of her expectations with regards to your London stay. Now, I know this somewhat forward of me, but have you become attached to a particular gentleman since your arrival?"
I was mortified. What did I have after three weeks in London but the realisation that my growing affection for Captain Price was a lost cause, both due to his lack of fortune and his imminent betrothal to Kitty Bennet?
"I wish Mrs Darcy were here to speak to you, but for obvious reasons it was impossible for her,” said Fitzwilliam in an apologetic tone. “However, she was very firm in her instructions, and said in no uncertain terms that, if I am to help you guarantee your happiness, I have to find out from yourself directly whether your affections are engaged."
"It's hard to say, Brother," was all I dared to muster. "I have met many people in the last few days."
My brother, however, knew me too well. After giving me a few moments to recollect myself, he gently probed me again.
"Georgiana, I have been informed that your heart has been set on someone of our acquaintance for a long time now. Is that a fact?"
So he had been aware of my unrequited love for Wickham all this time. I wanted to tell Fitzwilliam about how I had finally seen through Wickham's dark soul upon meeting him at the concert hall and how his memory no longer had any hold on me, but I was dumbstruck. My thoughts, much faster than my lips, immediately moved to the Wickhams' sordid story of clandestine love and betrayal and the imminent duel with Don Cosimo. The details of the case were lurid enough to guarantee they would be poured over in every publication, and Wickham was sure to drag the Darcy family name down with his. A sense of panic started to rise from my stomach. My brother needed to know, but I was completely unable to mention Wickham's name out loud in the presence of someone who had been so wronged by him.
Who will tell him?
Fitzwilliam's hand was swiftly on mine. He was looking at me with some alarm.
"You look pale, Georgiana. I am sorry I have caused you such distress, I will not say another word."
Just then, Fitzwilliam's eyes caught the jade clock on the commode, and his countenance changed. He immediately stood up.
"I am deeply sorry, Georgiana, but you will have to excuse me. I have a business appointment that I must absolutely keep. I will be back by five. Hopefully, you will have heard back from the Wentworths by then."
He was gone before I could utter a word.
Some minutes later, the footman came in with a quickly scribbled note from Cavendish Square Gardens. It confirmed that the Wentworths would be delighted to have Mr Darcy and Miss Darcy join them later that evening. I was very pleased with their answer, but my happiness was not complete. My thoughts had taken a dark turn, and there was but one thing I could do.
I rose from the sofa and sat at the desk by the window, i
n front of the remaining paper that had been brought in earlier. I had been unable to tell Fitzwilliam of the dangers looming over the family name, but he must be made aware of them. I must pen them down for him, and give him the note to read. I took the quill to the paper, but the words were unsatisfactory. I tried again, but it was no use. For the first time in my life, the written word was failing me.
I lost myself in the faint flicker remaining in the fireplace. There had to be a better way. As Georgiana Darcy, I was unable to give my brother the particulars of the case. However, what if the warning didn't come from me but from an anonymous friend? Caring to disguise my writing so as not give away my identity, I penned a short, unsigned letter informing my brother of the upcoming duel.
I had just finished folding the note when Cosette came in with word that Lady Catherine wanted to see me. I sent her back, saying I would be up at once. I slipped out of the drawing room, went towards the console table by the entrance and hid the letter for my brother in the pile of afternoon post. Then, I swiftly went up to the sick room.
Although Lady Catherine was still in bed, with a thick shawl over her nightgown, she was looking remarkably better. Her back was much straighter, barely touching the cushions placed to support her, and I guessed that Cosette had carefully applied a touch of cosmetics to give her a healthy appearance. I noticed that the little lapdog was napping on her lap, its small body tucked into a neat ball of black fur. I smiled inwardly; the poor thing would be pleased to be allowed back with its owner. My aunt was not in a good mood, however.
"Georgiana, I am most sorely disappointed. I hear that that you and your brother are going to the Wentworths tonight. What a waste of time. It would have been more convenient to leave things as they were. Even if your brother chooses to indulge you, it is rather selfish of you to insist on going against my and your cousin's advice. Darcy will be exhausted after the long ride from Pemberley."
Miss Darcy's Beaux Page 15