Beautifully Broken Pieces (The Sutter Lake Series Book 1)

by Catherine Cowles

  “That’s so sweet of you. The boys aren’t big wine drinkers, but why don’t you bring a bottle for us girls.”

  “I’d be happy to.”

  “Great. Why don’t you come over around six. We eat on the earlier side since Noah has an 8:30 bedtime.”

  “That sounds perfect. See you then.” I turned to Walker’s grandmother, who was studying me with an attention to detail that had my palms sweating. “It was lovely to meet you, Irma.”

  “You too, honey pie,” she said with that twinkle in her eye. “I look forward to seeing what tonight has in store.”

  “Oh, stop it, Mom,” Sarah said. Rolling her eyes at me, she continued. “If we let Irma have more than one glass of wine tonight, we’re likely in store for some off-key show tunes.” A soft laugh escaped my lips.

  “You lie, Sarah,” Irma huffed. “My pitch is perfect.”

  I threw my car in park and rubbed a damp palm down my jeans-clad leg. I hoped that jeans were the right choice. Sutter Lake seemed like a casual environment, so as I’d strewn clothing all over my bedroom, I’d decided against the maroon cocktail dress and gone with dark skinny jeans and a pale blue top that brought out the color of my eyes.

  I fidgeted with my keys. I could do this. I’d repeated that over and over as I got ready. Over and over as I drove. But one more time couldn’t hurt. I could do this. I could spend time with the Cole family and not let them into my heart.

  All I had to do was keep an emotional distance. I’d become an expert at dodging personal questions over the past few months. This dinner would be no different. I could enjoy the family’s company without their closeness breaking my heart. I just needed to keep that distance.

  I pushed open my door and slid out, grabbing my purse and the two bottles of wine from the passenger seat as I went. I studied the house as I walked up. It must have been designed by the same person who built the cabin because the styles were perfect complements to each other. The ranch house had the same dark wood-beamed façade and lots of windows. A wraparound porch hugged the outside and was home to eight rocking chairs and a porch swing. It was the perfect family home.

  As I climbed the porch steps, the front door swung open, and Noah rushed out. “Tay Tay! You’re here! Come and see my airplanes!”

  I let out a light laugh. “I’d love to see your planes.”

  Jensen appeared in the doorway. “After dinner, okay, Noah?”

  “Okay. I know all there is to know about planes. You might not know a lot about them, but don’t worry, I can teach you.” He had taken hold of my hand and was pulling me up the stairs and inside the house. I grinned at Jensen.

  “He’s not kidding. If he doesn’t end up a pilot or a mechanic, I’ll be shocked.”

  “Fighter pilot, Mom. You know that,” Noah said as he dropped my hand and went racing away.

  Jensen winced, turning her gaze back to me. “I’m hoping he’ll change his mind and shift to a career path that has a slightly lower mortality rate.”

  “He’s got time.”

  “Thank goodness for that. Oooh, did you bring wine?”

  I raised the two bottles, one in each hand. “You know it.”

  Jensen clasped her hands under her chin. “My hero.”

  I let out a laugh. “Girl after my own heart.”

  Jensen took one of the bottles from my hand, studying the label. “And you’ve got good taste, too. I knew I liked you.” She began leading me back to what looked like an open kitchen and dining space. “We should go out next weekend. The saloon is having a live band, and Mom said she’d watch Noah for me if I wanted to go.”

  I hesitated for a moment and then reminded myself that spending time with these people didn’t mean I had to bare my soul to them. “Sure. That sounds like fun.”

  “Woohoo, girls’ night!” Jensen called, raising the bottle of wine triumphantly in the air.

  “What’s going on?” The familiar, rough voice that sent a shiver down my spine sounded from my left.

  Jensen threw an arm around my shoulders. “Well, big brother, lock up your friends, because Taylor and I are going out on the town on Saturday.”

  Walker scrubbed a hand over his face. “Shit.”

  Jensen released me and smacked her brother on the shoulder. “Language.” Turning back to me, she continued, “I’ll go open this and pour us each a glass.”

  “Thanks.” It came out as a mumble because I was suddenly aware of every cell of my being and my proximity to Walker Cole.

  His gaze traveled over my face and down my body, each movement feeling like a physical caress. “You look beautiful, Short-stack.”

  I cleared my throat. “Thank you. You don’t look so bad yourself.”

  He moved closer until I could feel the heat of his body brushing up against mine. “I’m glad you came.” The words were low, only for us to hear.

  “It was nice of your mother to invite me.”

  Walker smirked. “So, it’s just my invites you turn down?”

  “I—” I started, but was cut off by a cackle behind us.

  Irma emerged from what looked like a study. “I love it! You two are going to make gorgeous babies, you know. And lots of them. Your whole house will be full.”

  Heat filled my cheeks as I instinctively stepped back from Walker, creating space between us. I immediately felt cold.

  Walker groaned. “Grandma, quit it with your crazy talk. You’re freaking Taylor out.”

  Irma clucked her tongue at her grandson. “You know I’m a little bit psychic.”

  Walker shook his head. “You are not. Predicting that our town’s little league team would win the state championship doesn’t make you psychic.”

  Irma harrumphed. “I knew Sarah was the one for your father. Without my meddling, they never would have ended up together.”

  “Whatever you say, Grandma.” Walker extended an arm. “Come on, Taylor, let’s go get you a drink.”

  Once I had wine to sip, I was introduced to Walker’s father, Andrew, who seemed like a kind man. He had a quiet strength about him, similar to Walker’s own. Dinner passed in joyful chaos, and I was surprised to find that it wasn’t difficult to be there.

  I had never experienced this kind of large family gathering before, one where people talked over and around one another, with three different conversations happening all at once. For as long as I could remember, it had only been my mom and me. My dad had left when I was two, and my mom’s parents had passed before I was born.

  I wondered what it would have been like to have a sibling to share the burden of the last couple of years with. Or a father who gave a shit. I’d never know.

  My life had never lacked in love, though. My mom worked herself to the bone to make sure I had everything a kid with two parents had. She was both mother and father. She was my everything.

  I felt tears burn the backs of my eyes as I stared at my coffee cup. A hand brushed my shoulder, and I was suddenly jolted back to the present moment. We had finished dinner and were sitting in the living room, chatting. I turned to see the hand’s owner. Walker. He studied me with an intensity that made me want to squirm in my seat. I knew he saw more than I wanted him to. Time to go.

  I forced a smile to my lips. “It’s getting late. I’d better get home. Thank you so much for dinner, it was delicious.”

  Sarah beamed. “Thank you for coming. You’re welcome anytime.”

  I rose from my seat, Walker doing the same.

  Irma cleared her throat. She was studying me in the same way her grandson did—like she recognized something in me that I didn’t want identified. “Walker, why don’t you follow Taylor home. Make sure she gets there all right.”

  My shoulders stiffened. “That isn’t necessary.”

  Sarah stood from her chair, crossing the space to take my coffee cup. “Actually, that’s a great idea. The roads on our property are so dark. It would make me feel a lot better if I knew you got home safely.”

  I was powerless against
Sarah and her pleading eyes. I pressed my lips together and nodded.

  I said my goodbyes to the rest of the family and headed for the door. A hand pressed against my lower back, and heat flared to life, my body tightening in response. How was it that my brain knew Walker was nothing but trouble and heartache for me, but my body yearned for his touch? There was a magnetic pull between us that had me fighting against leaning into his hand, curling into his side, and nuzzling his neck.

  I dug my nails into my palms, hoping the pain would break the spell Walker wove around me. “Let’s go.” His voice was a low rumble, sending vibrations through my ear, and weaving his hold tighter around me.

  I sucked in a breath and moved forward. I tried to rush without looking like I was doing so. I wanted to create some distance between us. I didn’t want the heat of his palm kissing my skin. The problem was, I was about a foot shorter than Walker. No matter how fast my little legs moved, they couldn’t seem to escape Walker’s long, forceful strides.

  The walk to my car felt like an expedition up Everest, but we finally made it. I beeped my locks, and Walker opened my door. “Thank you.” It came out as a whisper.

  His gaze was intense on my face. “You’re welcome. Do you want me to lead or follow?”

  “Lead.” I was worried I’d drive off the road if I knew he was behind me, evaluating my driving, analyzing my face in the rearview mirror, seeing into my soul.

  “All right.” He gently shut the door.

  I tried to force myself not to hold the steering wheel too tightly. The night was almost over. As I followed Walker’s truck through the winding gravel road, I imagined the long, hot bath I’d take when I got home. How I’d let the steaming water relax the muscles that had wound tight from Walker’s stare and his touch.

  I clenched my thighs together in an attempt to relieve some pressure. This was ridiculous. I probably just needed to get laid. Maybe I’d find some tourist to heat up the sheets with when Jensen and I went out on Saturday. A tourist wouldn’t stick around, so there was no risk of anyone getting too close. Now that sounded like a good plan.

  Walker pulled into an open spot at the front of the cabin, and I hit the remote on my visor. The garage door opened. I prayed that Walker would stay in his car. But, of course, he didn’t. By the time I’d shut off my engine, he was opening my car door. I jumped in my seat.

  “Geez, give a girl a heart attack, why don’t you.”

  Walker let out a chuckle. “Just trying to be a gentleman.”

  I narrowed my eyes at him. “Sure, you are.” He was trying to rile me. That’s what he was doing. He seemed to get some perverse pleasure out of pushing my buttons. I tightened my hold on my keys, the metal digging into my palm. “Can you please move so I can get out of my car?”

  He stepped back, but barely. And when I had to squeeze by him to get to the door, our entire bodies brushed. My eyes shot to his. There was heat blazing in his green depths. My heart quickened, and my breaths turned shallow. “I need to get inside.”

  He blinked a few times as if coming back to himself and then shook his head. “Sorry.” The one word had a bite to it, and his jaw tensed. He stepped back even farther, his fists opening and closing.

  His change in demeanor had my brows furrowing. I managed to nod but didn’t say anything, just ducked my chin and rushed inside, wondering what I’d done to piss Walker Cole off.

  15

  Walker

  I slammed my truck’s door with enough force to send the entire vehicle rocking. I adjusted my jeans, attempting to relieve some of the pressure. My dick was hard enough to split wood. Fuck.

  I started the engine and hit the extra clicker to shut Taylor’s garage door. The attraction I felt for her was only growing, and I had no idea what to do about it. When her tight little body had brushed up against mine in the garage, I’d felt flames lick my skin.

  Honestly, it was freaking me out. What Julie and I had shared was a pure, innocent love. We were each other’s first everything. Bumbling and fumbling hands and bodies. Learning what each other liked and didn’t. It was perfect. But it wasn’t this fiery, living, breathing energy I felt coming to life with Taylor.

  It pissed me off. It was ridiculous for me to be angry at someone for turning me on in a way my dead girlfriend never had, but I was. I rolled down my window and let the chilly night air ease my temper and cool my overheated skin.

  I inhaled deeply. None of this mattered. What Taylor needed right now was a friend. And I wasn’t even sure she’d let me be that, let alone have more than friendship.

  Pulling up my gravel drive, I saw the darkened windows of an empty home. Was this how it would always be? Empty and dark?

  I switched off the engine and hopped down from the cab to make my way up my front porch steps. “Pull up a rocker, would ya?” The voice had me going for my gun on instinct. But I relaxed when my brain processed that it was my grandmother.

  “What in the world are you doing sitting here alone in the dark? And how in the hell did you get here?”

  “Oh, relax. I’m just enjoying looking at the night sky. And I took one of the golf carts.”

  I let out an exasperated sigh. “Grandma, you know you’re not supposed to be driving anymore. Do Mom and Dad even know you’re gone?”

  “Golf carts don’t count,” Grandma huffed.

  I took that to mean that my parents had no idea she wasn’t asleep in her bed at that moment. I sank into the rocker next to her. “So, what was so important you had to drag your ass out of bed and come all the way over here?”

  She shook her head. “I won’t have you sassing me, young man.”

  “Sorry, Grandma. Please, tell me what’s wrong.”

  “That’s better.” My grandmother was quiet for a few beats with only the noise of the rocker against the wood-planked porch and the night insects breaking the silence. “I’m worried about Taylor.”

  I stiffened, pausing the motion of my rocker. “Why?”

  “She’s grieving,” my grandmother said, pain in her voice.

  “How do you know that?” I hadn’t shared a word of what Austin had told me with anyone, not even my family.

  “I’ve been around the block a time or two. I know what grief looks like.”

  I reached out, taking my grandmother’s papery hand in my own. She would know. She’d lost a child at a young age, and a husband in her prime. She knew grief better than most. “I’m sorry, Gran.”

  “Thank you, hon. But this isn’t about me. I just hurt for her.”

  I tipped my rocker back and forth, staring out at the dark fields in front of me. “Her mom died a few months ago.”

  My grandma’s face crumpled. “Poor thing.”

  “And her dad is a fucking loser who abandoned her.” I sucked in a harsh breath, the cool night air burning my lungs. “She has almost no one.”

  “I was worried about that.” Gran paused again. “Someone needs to be there for that girl.” She eyed me meaningfully. “Knock down some of those walls. If she doesn’t let someone in, and soon, those barriers will petrify, and nothing and no one will get through.”

  My stomach tightened. “I don’t know if I’m the right—”

  “Of course, you are,” my grandmother said, the words forceful and resolute. Her tone softened. “I know you have your own weight to carry, but that’s exactly why you are the perfect person to get through those walls Taylor’s put up.”

  I listened to the blades of the rocker as they made contact with the wood planks below. “She’s most likely leaving in a year. Her friends want her to move back to LA. It’s taken me weeks to get her to share even one thing with me. I’m not sure there’s enough time.”

  Gran squeezed my hand. “No one knows what the future will hold, Walker. Just be her friend. Don’t let her push you away. Be there when the breakdown happens so you can help turn it into a breakthrough.”

  Be her friend. I could do that. I just needed to dull this simmering attraction. As we were aro
und each other longer, it would surely begin to fade. I just had to ignore it until then. “All right, Gran. I’ll do my best.”

  “I know you will.” She smiled, her white teeth shining in the moonlight.

  My phone buzzed in my pocket. Pulling it out, I grimaced at the screen.

  Caitlin: I’m sorry I overreacted. Please answer my calls. We can work this out. We are so good together.

  I typed out a reply.

  Me: I don’t think there’s anything left to talk about. You’ll find the right guy. It just isn’t me.

  I silenced my phone and shoved it back into my pocket. I couldn’t deal with Caitlin tonight on top of everything else.

  Grandma eyed me curiously. “Everything okay?”

  “Yup. Come on. I’ll drive you home.”

  “I wish you’d just let me take the golf cart.”

  “I’m a cop. I’d have to arrest you for driving without a license.”

  “Who knew I’d raise a grandson that would turn out to be a narc.”

  All I could do was chuckle.

  16

  Taylor

  A horn sounded from my driveway, and I slid my lip gloss into my clutch. Ready to go. I grabbed my keys off the hook by the door and headed out.

  Jensen let out a wolf whistle through her rolled-down window. “Girl, you look hot! Ready to meet some of the local talent?”

  I grinned as I opened the SUV’s door and hopped inside. “You know it.”

  Jensen executed a flawless three-point turn, saying, “I’m driving us there but leaving my car. Bryce said he’d drive us home.”

  “Bryce, huh?” I knew there was love brewing there.

  Jensen’s cheeks pinked. “We’re dating. God, it still feels weird to say that. It’s pretty new. I haven’t introduced him to Noah as a boyfriend or anything.”

  “He’s definitely sweet on you.” Warmth filled my chest. I was happy that Jensen had someone who made her blush at the mention of his name. “This also means I get my pick of all the guys tonight. You really are the perfect wing-woman.”