by Karly Lane
Before they could stumble off to bed, there was still the header to blow down and clean. Griff could understand how easy it was after a long day to leave it to the next morning, but—as Ollie had found out the hard way—with so much else on your mind, it was easy to overlook the cleaning the next day too, when all you wanted to do was get started. They couldn’t risk a fire. So as much as he would like to crash into bed, he couldn’t just yet.
‘So you and Liv, huh?’ Linc said after a long drink from his can.
‘Yeah.’ Memories of the night before flashed through his mind and he stared down at the dirt between his boots. He’d felt like crap when she’d left. He’d gone to bed and sworn as he stared up at the ceiling. Everything in him had screamed to get up and go to her, but he’d needed some time to deal with his emotions.
‘Trouble in paradise already?’ his brother asked, obviously picking up on his mood.
‘Nah,’ Griff started, but then shook his head. ‘Buggered if I know.’
‘What’s going on?’
‘We’ve just got a few issues to sort out.’
‘These issues wouldn’t have anything to do with what happened at Christmas, would they?’
Griff glanced up quickly at that and saw Linc’s concerned frown. ‘Why would you say that?’
Linc shrugged one shoulder, before taking another sip of beer. ‘Cash got the feeling that Olivia was a little uncomfortable last night at dinner.’
‘She had a few reservations,’ Griff admitted reluctantly, ‘about how things would be when I saw Cash again. I tried to tell her everything was fine,’ he said, shaking his head. ‘I don’t know what else I can do to make her believe me.’
‘Maybe Cash could talk to her?’
Griff shook his head quickly, ‘Nah, I think that would only add fuel to the fire. She said she believes me, but I don’t know … there’s just something … I can’t put my finger on it.’ Griff swore and gave a long sigh. ‘Guess she’ll just have to make up her own mind. I don’t know what else I can do.’
‘The only advice I can give you is don’t let things brew. Get that shit out in the open and fix it. Ignoring it never ends well.’
‘Wow,’ Griff said, leaning back against the header. ‘Who would have guessed that out of all of us, you’d be the one offering words of relationship wisdom.’
‘Almost seems unfair that I ended up with all the looks and the brains. You really missed out, huh,’ Linc said with mock sympathy.
‘You keep telling yourself that, old man,’ Griff chuckled, before sobering. ‘I’m really happy for you, for both of you, about the baby,’ he said, looking his brother in the eye. ‘I think it’s awesome.’
Linc looked surprised by the shift in their banter, and Griff noticed a flash of uncertainty cross his face. ‘I just hope I don’t stuff it up … the whole dad thing, you know?’
‘You won’t. You’ll be a great dad.’ And he meant it. His throat felt uncommonly tight and he quickly swallowed past the unexpected emotion. ‘I mean, unless the poor little bugger ends up with your looks … then there could be a problem.’
He laughed as his brother muttered an unsavoury curse at him, and he found himself feeling somehow lighter, as though a weight had begun to lift from his shoulders. Maybe they were going to be okay after all. ‘Come on, let’s get this finished so we can get to bed.’ They downed the remainder of their beer, crumpling the cans and tossing them into the large bin nearby, before getting back to work.
Part of him wanted to head over to Olivia’s and hash it out now, get to the bottom of everything and put their relationship back on track. He already missed the way things had been, but he knew emotions always ran high when you were tired and he’d risk making things worse if he went over there in this condition. With any luck, they’d knock over the remainder of this harvest within the next few days and then life could get back to normal for a while … at least until the next round of harvesting started.
‘Okay, spill,’ Ollie said two days later as Olivia finished up an oil change on the farm ute and wiped her hands on a rag.
‘Spill what?’ she asked, frowning at her brother.
‘Whatever the hell is going on with you.’
‘Nothing’s going on.’
‘Bull. You’ve been finding any job you can think of to do around the place and you’ve turned down two invitations from Hadley.’
‘What are you, my social secretary?’
‘Apparently, since I’m now handling your phone calls when no one can reach you.’
‘I didn’t ask you to,’ she said, tossing the cloth on the bench as she walked from the machinery shed.
‘I get why you’d be giving Griff the cold shoulder—kinda,’ he amended, ‘but what’s Hadley done to piss you off?’
‘Nothing,’ she said with a little more force than the question warranted. ‘I just don’t feel like going out.’
‘That bit I’d believe, but turning down shopping? And doing an oil change … voluntarily? Yeah, nah.’ He shook his head. ‘Not buying that for a second.’
‘Suit yourself,’ she shrugged.
‘Liv, come on. Something’s really wrong and I’m worried about you.’
Why did he have to play the concerned twin card, damn him? ‘I’m fine. Seriously,’ she assured him. ‘I’ve just …’ She let out a frustrated breath.
‘What?’
‘Just got a lot on my mind at the moment. It’s nothing to worry about.’
‘Is it Griff?’
‘No,’ and it wasn’t. She hadn’t even thought much about that whole issue since the dinner the other night. She could only deal with one crisis at a time.
‘Did you and Hadley have a fight?’
‘No, it’s nothing like that,’ she said, opening the back screen door. ‘Just drop it, Ollie. I can’t talk about it.’ She kicked herself as soon as the words were out. Damn it! Why had she said that—now he would be really concerned.
‘Yes, you can,’ he said, stepping in her path as she headed down the hall towards her bedroom. ‘Tell me what’s going on.’
‘Look, I have to make a decision about something and I don’t know what … to do,’ she said as a wave of helplessness washed over her. She’d hardly slept since the dinner—two nights of broken sleep. Guilt was eating her alive every time she picked up the phone and heard Hadley’s voice. Her gut was screaming to tell her, but she knew her friend was still feeling miserable, and her refusal to go shopping or out for drinks probably hadn’t helped.
‘Hadley sounded really worried, Liv. She thinks she’s done something to upset you. What’s going on?’
Olivia started to shake her head but made the mistake of looking up and caught the concern in her brother’s eyes. It was too much for her tired mind to cope with and she felt tears well and spill down her cheeks. ‘Ollie, I don’t know what to do,’ she said before her brother pulled her close and hugged her tightly.
‘Come on, sit down and tell me. We’ll figure it out, whatever it is.’
She hadn’t planned on telling anyone, but the moment she opened her mouth everything tumbled out—the whole sorry tale of Harmony and Mitch, and Hadley’s miscarriage. When she’d finished she looked up and saw his jaw clenched tightly and a fierce look on his usually gentle face.
‘I’ll kill him,’ he said quietly. Had he yelled it, Olivia would have brushed it off as bravado, but the quiet, calm way he spoke scared her. She actually believed if Mitch was in this room right now, her brother would, in fact, kill him.
‘Ollie, you can’t say anything. Hadley can’t know right now.’
‘Are you crazy? Of course she has to know, Liv.’
‘Didn’t you hear what I said? She’s just lost a baby, Ol, and you want to tell her that her husband and sister are having an affair as well?’ She shook her head firmly. ‘I won’t do it to her. Not yet. She needs time to grieve and recover.’
She saw the strain around her brother’s mouth loosen slightly as her words sank in
, but there was still a worrying glint of fury in his eyes.
‘I know how you feel, trust me. I was ready to storm in there and beat the guy senseless with a shovel, but then I remembered Hadley’s face when she was telling me about the baby and I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t make a huge scene and put her through all that then and there.’
‘We can’t just sit here and let it go.’
‘Well, we can’t very well confront Mitch and Harmony about it either, without creating a massive drama. Hadley would know something was wrong—besides, Harmony’s gone back to Griffith and Mitch has been called away with work. He left last night. Oh God, this is going to rip the whole family apart, Ollie. What a mess.’
Ollie looked as devastated as she was feeling. ‘Why have you been giving Hadley the brush-off?’
‘Because I can’t look her in the eye, Ollie. You know how badly I suck at lying—she’s going to see right through me. And I feel like absolute crap knowing what I know and not telling her.’
They fell silent for a while, Ollie processing everything he’d just learned and Olivia wallowing in her guilt.
‘I understand why you don’t want to tell her,’ Ollie said eventually. ‘I think it’s not doing her any favours keeping it a secret, though. I can see this blowing up in our faces if we don’t let her know the truth.’
‘We will tell her, I promise,’ Olivia said, holding her brother’s troubled gaze. ‘Just give me a few more days to work out how.’
‘Well, avoiding her isn’t helping. She needs her best friend right now, more than ever. You’re going to have to suck it up and be there for her.’
Olivia swallowed and nodded. ‘I know. I will,’ she promised. No matter how bad she felt, she’d find a way to put on a front. ‘I’ll call her now and tell her I’ve changed my mind about going out and we’ll meet her in at the pub tonight.’
‘We? No. I’m not going.’
‘You have to, Ollie,’ Olivia pleaded. ‘I can’t do this on my own. Please?’
Ollie briefly shut his eyes and swore, before opening them and sending his sister a solemn look. ‘I’ll do it as long as you promise to tell her.’
‘I promise I will. Soon.’
‘I’m serious, Liv. If you don’t tell her, I will. She has to know, and it’s better to hear it from us than to find out some other way.’
He was right, she knew that, but it didn’t help how crappy she was feeling at the prospect. The last thing she wanted to do was hurt her best friend, and it seemed that’s exactly what she was going to have to do.
Twenty-three
‘Are you sure you want to come here?’ Olivia asked Hadley as they walked towards the pub. ‘We could go somewhere less … well, Rankins Springs,’ she said, eyeing the crowd she could see through the open doors. She loved her little town, but there would be no privacy here; everyone would want to chat with Hadley and she wasn’t sure her friend was up to such public socialising.
‘This is exactly where I need to be, Liv. I need to get away from home and work and all the other places where people know me.’
‘Ah, Hads,’ Olivia said hesitantly, ‘everyone here knows you.’
‘Yeah, but they know me,’ she said, then gave a sad smile. ‘It’s different here, everyone knows me as Hadley Callahan, Bob and Lavinia’s daughter. In the city, I’m Hadley Callahan, the girl from TV. I just want to forget about that part for a while and be me again.’
It made sense. While she wasn’t famous like Hadley, Olivia did understand getting back to your roots. Whenever she’d come home for a visit, it’d always warm her to go to something like carols by candlelight or drinks at the pub because it was like she’d never left home. This community always welcomed back its own with open arms.
They were greeted by a few familiar faces as they made their way to the bar, stopping to chat as they went. They paid for their drinks and found a table in their usual spot, and Olivia saw Hadley relax as she spent a few moments letting her gaze touch on all the familiar fittings and photos around the pub. ‘It doesn’t change in here,’ she said quietly.
Olivia gave the room a quick glance and nodded her agreement.
‘I like that it doesn’t change.’
There was something sad in Hadley’s voice and Olivia suspected there was more going on with her friend than her recent loss. ‘Is everything okay, Hads?’
Hadley opened her mouth to answer, but before she could the seat beside her was pulled out and Griffin folded his large frame into the chair. ‘You made it,’ Hadley said, and Olivia noticed she avoided looking at her.
That sneaky … her thoughts trailed off as she caught Griffin’s eye and felt a flurry of nerves. She’d hated the way they’d left things.
There was a movement beside her as Ollie took the other seat at their table. ‘Sorry, I’m late. Had to fix a busted hose on the tractor,’ Ollie said, holding Hadley’s glance briefly before dropping his gaze and shifting in his seat.
Olivia caught his eye and sent him a look she was pretty sure he could translate—knock it off! He was supposed to be the buffer to keep things normal and he was acting weird.
‘I’m starving. How about we order something to eat?’ she said, jumping in quickly.
‘Sounds good,’ Ollie said, getting up. ‘I’ll go grab some menus.’ He disappeared before anyone had a chance to agree.
‘Is it just me, or does Ollie seem … I don’t know, nervous or something?’ Hadley asked, eyeing his back as he weaved through the tables.
‘Seems normal to me,’ Griff said and Olivia held his level gaze for a moment.
‘I think I’ll just go to the ladies,’ Hadley said, standing up. ‘No, you stay here with Griff, I won’t be long,’ she said when Olivia made to get up too.
‘I’ll never understand the need for women to go to the toilet in pairs.’ Griff shook his head as he reached across to lift his glass.
‘Safety in numbers,’ she said lightly.
‘What do you actually do in there?’ he asked.
‘I’d tell you, but then I’d have to kill you,’ she said haughtily.
She saw his brief grin and her pulse skidded a little. She missed him.
‘We need to talk,’ he said quietly.
‘You said pretty much everything the other night, if I remember correctly,’ she said lightly, unable to look at him. ‘You said you couldn’t live like that.’
‘I was upset, Liv.’
‘I know,’ she said calmly. ‘But I can’t do more than tell you that I know this thing with Cash isn’t an issue any more.’
‘It never was,’ he said, leaning closer.
‘Fine,’ she said. ‘I was being a jealous idiot, okay? Happy?’
‘I’m not happy. I’m miserable. I miss you,’ he said, sliding back in his chair, his shoulders slumping. ‘I just want it to go back to the way it was.’
‘I—’ She’d been about to tell him she missed him too, but Ollie chose that moment to return and pass out the menus.
Olivia was fairly certain anyone who didn’t know the four of them would assume this was a first double date, the way the conversation was so stilted and full of awkward silences. By nine-thirty, thankfully, Hadley decided to call it a night.
They walked outside after farewelling everyone they knew on the way through the pub, and the warm night air felt oddly refreshing.
As they reached Ollie’s car, Griff said, ‘Mate, do me a favour, take Hads home for me, will ya? Your sister and I need to sort a few things out.’
Olivia was too surprised to protest. She stared at her brother and best friend accusingly as they agreed without a blink of an eye, making Olivia suspect this had been prearranged.
‘I’ll call you tomorrow.’ Hadley gave her a hug, then slid into Ollie’s ute and shut the door, leaving her standing on the footpath alone with Griffin.
‘Was this really necessary?’ Olivia asked, shutting the door as she got into his car.
‘Would you have come willingly?’ he shot
back, turning the key in the ignition.
They both knew the answer to that—probably not.
Olivia stared out the window, watching the shadows pass by in the darkness. The gentle hum of the tyres on the road provided a soothing backdrop, and the soft music playing on the radio eased the need for conversation. When they arrived back at her house, Olivia tossed her bag on the kitchen bench and kicked off her heels.
‘Coffee?’ she asked, not looking at him as she reached for the cups.
‘No. I don’t want coffee,’ he said, leaning over and taking the cups from her hand and putting them on the bench behind her. She could feel the warmth of his body pressing gently against her. He felt so good and smelled so tempting. He leaned closer and moved his lips against the side of her neck. She closed her eyes against the torment. He wasn’t playing fair at all. How did she stand a chance of remaining indifferent against this?
‘This doesn’t solve anything, you know,’ she said, trying to sound stern, but failing.
‘It solves a few things actually,’ he corrected her, moving his hands up her sides.
He had a point; it did solve the lonely ache she’d had since their fight.
After a few feeble attempts to remind him that this didn’t fix the underlying problem, Olivia gave up. She’d just wait till they got this out of their system and then they’d be able to be reasonable.
Griff knew he’d missed Olivia, but until that first kiss, he hadn’t realised just how deeply it went. He couldn’t do casual—he knew that as soon as his lips touched hers. ‘We need to talk about this, Liv,’ he said, hating to break the fragile peace they’d found—that brief moment when all was perfect.
‘We did talk about it. Do we have to go over it all again?’
‘No, not about that, I mean about us. Where this thing is going.’ He felt her tense a little, but he refused to back away from it. ‘It’s important, Liv.’