Zio swallowed a growl. It was wrong. All of it. Devan didn’t feel like a liar, but he wasn’t pack. Whatever he said and everything about the exchange made Zio’s skin crawl. See? Definitely the booze.
The meeting moved on. Surveillance footage was reviewed, and plans were drawn up to flank the enemy’s recon crew and take them out.
“We move tonight,” Varian said. “Zio’s unit will lead; Gale’s will back them up.”
“Where do you want me?” Devan asked.
“Somewhere behind,” Varian said. “I don’t think they’ll target you, but I can’t risk losing another healer with my entire elite squad deployed.”
Devan nodded his ascent. “Works for me, but before then, I need to scout your countryside. Gather some supplies.”
Varian’s gaze flickered to Zio and back again. “Did you not find what you need in Emma’s room and her clinic?”
“Powers are individual to each healer,” Devan said. “Emma used many tinctures and fruits of her native forests, but I have no connection to many of them, so they won’t work for me.”
“Sounds wacky,” Bomber muttered.
Devan laughed. “Forest magic can be that way if you don’t understand it.”
“Where do you need to go?” Varian asked.
“Everywhere.” Devan drew a map towards him and traced his finger along the wooded areas that surrounded the township and beyond. “I need herbs and ferns. Tree sap and heathers.”
Varian leaned forward. “How long will it take you?”
“A few hours if I know where to look, less if I can shift to cover more ground.”
“I can’t allow that.”
“You said I was free to roam.”
“You are, but in your human form . . . for now. There’s much tension in the air, at the moment, among wolves and humans, and I haven’t had enough time to warn all folk of your presence.”
It made sense, but Zio couldn’t imagine his wolf ever living with such restriction. He waited for Devan to argue his case, to fight for whatever beast lurked within the man, but it didn’t happen.
Devan sat back in his seat. “As you wish. Perhaps a wolf could accompany me then?”
“Of course. Zio knows the land the best. He’ll take you.”
Zio sighed. Super.
Zio brought Varian’s car round to the front of the house and tapped his fingers on the steering wheel, waiting for Devan to emerge. In another life, he might’ve found it funny that he’d somehow become a taxi driver for a Shadow Clan healer, but there was nothing funny about the prospect of spending the rest of the day cooped up with a scent that drove him insane. Or with a man who hadn’t met Zio’s gaze the entire time they’d sat next to each other.
Fuck. It’s gonna be a long day.
And an even longer night, if the plans they’d drawn up in the meeting came together. Zio ran through them over and over, calculating risks, weighing them against the advantage they could gain by destroying the southern pack’s recon unit. The enemy would find replacements soon enough, but maybe it would buy enough time to retake some much-needed territory.
The passenger door opened. Despite the supercharged energy running through Zio, he jumped a mile and glared at Devan. “Don’t fucking sneak up on me.”
Devan raised an eyebrow. “I didn’t. Perhaps you’re not as alert as you think you are.”
He spoke mildly, and Zio wanted to punch him. But a wave of scent hit him before he could clench his fist, and fighting quickly became the last thing on his mind.
Zio swallowed hard. “Whatever. Get in.”
Devan slid into the passenger seat and shut the door behind him. The potency of his scent increased tenfold, and any hope that Zio may’ve harboured that he could handle being alone with Devan like this evaporated as though it had never been there at all.
He shivered.
Devan finally looked at him. “Everything okay?”
Not trusting himself to speak, Zio nodded and started the car. He pulled onto the road that would take them out of the military compound and through the township—a place Devan must’ve explored already if the stocked fridge was anything to go by.
Case in point, they passed the supermarket that sold Zio’s favourite pizzas. Despite every nerve being tensed to breaking point, his stomach betrayed him and growled like a malfunctioning tractor.
Devan chuckled quietly. “Why don’t you just eat? Or are you some kind of masochist?”
It was an accusation that had been thrown at him before, and he couldn’t deny that he was starving. Besides, stopping for food would give him a break from Devan’s scent— Seriously? You’ve been in the car five minutes.
Zio pulled over anyway. “Do you want anything?”
“Nope.”
“Fine.” Zio got out of the car and slammed the door loud enough for a human family to turn and stare at him. He stared back until they uncomfortably looked away, then jogged into the shop.
The supermarket sold hot pizzas from a counter by the checkouts. Zio bought a whole large pizza and ate three slices on his way back to the car.
He offered the box to Devan. “Sure you don’t want some?”
“No thanks. I don’t eat mushrooms.”
“What?”
Devan shrugged. “I killed someone with them once. It’s a thing.”
“Did you kill them on purpose?”
“No.”
“Wasn’t your fault then.” Zio dropped the box on the backseat. “Don’t be a weirdo about shit you can’t change.”
“That a life lesson, Zio?”
“Who the fuck knows.”
Certainly not Zio. He restarted the car and resumed their journey as the food worked its way into his system, soothing the scratchy sensation in his gut. His muscles relaxed, and his grip on the steering wheel loosened. He forgot himself and took a deep breath, but far from agitating him, Devan’s scent calmed him even further, and for the first time in weeks, he felt as though he could finally sleep.
Shame he was driving.
“Feel better?” Devan’s voice was soft, barely a murmur.
Zio wanted to be irritated, but it wouldn’t come. He nodded and took the turning that would lead them away from suburbia and into the countryside. “Yeah.”
Devan didn’t answer, and a silence settled over them as Varian’s powerful car ate up the miles. Zio leaned back in his seat and tried to keep his eyes to himself. Failed, naturally, but much like the squad meeting, Devan seemed oblivious to his attention. It was as though he’d drawn a line in the sand, and Zio couldn’t reach him until he crossed it.
The desire for something Zio couldn’t decipher hit him in slow, rolling waves, strong enough to shake the peace he’d found just moments ago but gentle enough to keep him upright. He bit his lip, drawing blood, as always.
Devan sighed and laid a hand on Zio’s thigh. “Don’t think so hard.”
His touch was electric. Warmth spread through Zio like a smouldering wildfire and the cut on his lip closed over, the blood he’d tasted on his tongue gone. “The fuck? Did you just . . . heal me?”
“Not on purpose.” Devan kept his gaze on the increasingly green landscape. “Sometimes my gift escapes me before I can catch it, not that I’d imagine I did much your body wouldn’t have done for itself. Wolves have unique healing powers, the fastest and most comprehensive of all supernatural beings.”
“Even vampires?”
“Vampires are harder to hurt in the first place.”
“I don’t like vampires.”
Devan grinned, and in the soft sunlight, his face seemed to glow. “They probably don’t like you much either.”
Zio laughed. Couldn’t help it. “Nah, probably not. Oh hey, we’re almost there. See that railway bridge at the top of the hill?”
“Yeah?”
“There’s a nature park on the other side. It’s protected, so humans don’t go there with their kids and dogs, churning up all the plants. We run there as a pack sometimes. At
least, we used to when there were more of us.”
“You’ve lost many?”
Zio pulled into a lay-by and turned the engine off. “Too many to count.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Why? You didn’t kill them.”
“No, but I can feel how much it hurts you that someone else did. You feel responsible.”
“Fucking mind reader, are you? Like Varian?”
Devan shook his head. “It’s not like that. If I’ve healed someone, I’m often connected to them for a while after. It’s a kind of empathy, I guess.”
“Yeah, well, knock it off. I don’t want you all up in my feelings.”
Another chuckle softened the air between them. Devan opened the car door and his hand—the one Zio had forgotten about—slid from Zio’s thigh, taking with it the zen-like bliss that had allowed Zio to think clearly. “Suit yourself, brother.”
Chapter Nine
Devan swung through the trees, gathering leaves and twigs he could grind into powder. On the ground below, he sensed Zio’s gaze on him, but replenishing his supplies of healing aids took precedence over the strange energy between them. Claiming resources from the earth was a sacred ritual, especially if they one day helped Devan protect Zio from more pain.
Hands full, he dropped to the ground and deposited his bounty in the small bag Zio held. “I need to find some Plymouth pear trees.”
“Not round here. They only grow in the south—in Plymouth, funnily enough, and a few places near Cornwall.”
“Okay then . . . what about whitebeam?”
“In the wild? I’ve only seen them in human gardens.”
Devan glanced around. “I can do without both if you can find me a really old yew tree.”
“Yew trees are poisonous.”
“I can make them safe.”
Zio took Devan at his word and scaled a nearby oak tree to look out over the land. “There’s some a few miles away, but we’re running out of time. I can get there and back if I shift.”
Envy warred with Devan’s desire to have everything he needed safely in his possession as quickly as possible. I need to run. But he couldn’t. He’d been forbidden by his wolf alpha. Letting Zio go in his place was his only option. “I only need a handful of foliage. Don’t carry it in your mouth, though. It’s not safe until I’ve mixed it with other things. Here, take the bag.”
Devan emptied the bag onto the forest floor as Zio ripped his T-shirt over his head and unbuttoned his jeans. The unmistakable scent of bare skin bombarded Devan, taking him back, unbidden, to the club. His pulse quickened, and heat pooled in his groin. He counted seedpods and leaves. Recounted them. But it was no good. There was nothing on earth that could overcome the effect Zio’s scent seemed to have on him.
“What’s up with you?” Zio’s jeans hit the ground. “You look like a human having a stroke.”
Devan closed his eyes and held out the bag. “Go. Please.”
Zio took the bag, and energy shimmered around them as he morphed into his wolf form. His pleasure-pain at shifting was so palpable, Devan could taste it, and he didn’t open his eyes until he was sure Zio had gone.
Alone in the forest, Devan gathered Zio’s clothes and folded them into a neat pile, noting, as he had in the club, that Zio didn’t care for underwear. In an effort to dissuade himself from pressing his sensitive nose to the soft cotton of Zio’s T-shirt or, worse, his jeans, Devan abandoned the clothes and paced the woodland Zio had brought him to. It smelt deeply of the northern pack, especially Zio’s unit. Their scent was everywhere, while Gale’s unit appeared to stick to the paths.
Devan pondered the significance. There was no denying the differences between the two units and their betas. Zio’s crew were as closed off and suspicious as him. Gale’s unit had taken Varian’s orders to make him feel welcome to heart. How does that work on the battlefield? Devan imagined it was complicated, and he didn’t envy Varian’s job. Not least because Dash had been right when he’d said Varian’s pack was special. That their existence meant something to the world. How could anyone manage that when their main occupation right now was war?
That’s why you’re here. To keep them alive.
Devan’s gaze fell on the pile of twigs, roots, and leaves, and though he knew the magic they possessed, they suddenly didn’t seem anywhere near enough. He delved deep into his healer’s soul and searched for his own power, the strength that he’d given Zio an unintentional taste of earlier. For many years, Devan had walked the earth confident in his ability to heal any wound he truly wanted to, but what if he couldn’t? What if after everything, he was the weak link?
A wolf rushed into the clearing before he found an answer, Devan’s fabric bag hanging around its neck. The beast was dark and rangy, like Zio in his human form, and its black coat shone like silk. Devan reached out to touch it, to feel the inky fur against his own skin, but the wolf blurred in the late winter sunshine, and before he could blink, Zio stood before him, bag in hand and completely and utterly naked.
Zio’s bones shortened and clicked back into place. He stretched his neck and dangled the bag of yew foliage in front of Devan. “Do you want this or not?”
Devan closed his fingers around the bag but made no move to take it. His gaze burnt through Zio’s skin, sizzling his nerves, and Zio’s breath caught in his throat.
“Stop looking at me like that.”
Devan licked his lips. “Like what?”
“Like you want to eat me.”
Devan blinked, and a rough chuckle escaped him. “You’re ridiculous.”
“Not on purpose.”
“Uh-huh.” Devan took the bag and stepped back.
Zio stepped forward before he could catch himself. Devan raised a wry brow, but Zio couldn’t bring himself to care. His base instincts outran his brain, and the need to touch Devan was abruptly overwhelming. He took another step, closing the distance between them until they were an inch apart.
Devan was shorter than him, slimmer, but his body, frustratingly hidden by clothes, was lithe and powerful. Zio pondered what his shifter form could be. Agile and beautiful, he’d moved through the trees with a grace that told Zio he was no wolf, but he’d known that already. When the time came for them to choose, Shadow Clan rarely took the form of a wolf. Most of them were big cats, like their leaders, but that hardly narrowed it down.
“You wanna stop looking at me like that?”
Devan’s voice was low, barely a whisper, and laced with enough of a growl to snap Zio out of his daze. Zio clenched his fists to keep his hands at his sides. “I’m not looking at you like anything.”
“Yes, you are, and it’s not fair if you’re going to rip my head off every time I glance your way.”
“Last time I checked, your head was on your shoulders.”
Glorious fucking shoulders. Zio still couldn’t believe Devan was smaller than him. In the club, he’d seemed huge, his presence so imposing Zio had submitted to him the moment they’d found each other, lured by his scent and powerless to resist the desire to devour every part of Devan he’d been coordinated enough to touch. Warm skin, strong jaw, hard chest. Zio’s head swam, and frustration erupted, spilling out of him with a furious growl. “Fuck! How does this not affect you? I’m losing my mind.”
He whirled away, intent on shifting and making a run for it until he was far enough away to regain his composure, but Devan caught him. His grip on Zio’s wrist was firm, but the hold on a deeper part of Zio was absolute. “Wait.”
Zio closed his eyes, impatience, panic, and utter bewilderment battling for dominance in his fucked-up soul. “Why?”
Devan didn’t answer with words. He put his hands on Zio’s shoulders and turned him around, pinning him in place. “Trust me, this is affecting me. More than you’ll ever know.”
“I want to know.”
“No, you don’t. You don’t want me here at all.”
“That’s—” But the argument died on Zio’s lips. Devan was right—
he didn’t want him here. He wished he’d never come, that they’d never met, so he could go back to the long days and nights when grief and revenge were the only things on his mind. Emotions he understood. Pain he could take a hundred times more than the bone-deep ache in his chest. “I don’t know what to do.”
A breeze shook the forest. Zio harnessed himself to the earth and felt the ground shake as desperation ripped through him. A nearby tree splintered.
Devan sucked in a breath. “The gods was that?”
“It’s you driving me crazy.” Zio snapped his eyes open. “What are you doing to me? Why do you have this . . . thing over me?”
Devan growled again. “What makes you think it’s so one-sided? That this is what I want?”
The ache in Zio’s chest increased tenfold. “If you don’t want me, let me go.”
“I can’t.”
“Why not?”
“For the same reason you can’t push me away.”
Zio had been lost for weeks, adrift on a tide he couldn’t contain, but the impact of Devan’s words was so great he swayed on his feet, kept upright only by Devan’s unwavering grip on his shoulders. “I don’t understand.”
“You don’t need to. We just need to ignore it until it goes away.”
Zio frowned. “Until what goes away?”
“You really don’t know?”
Zio shook his head, and a helplessness crept into Devan’s intense gaze. He opened his mouth. Shut it again.
Then he sighed. “This would be a hell of a lot easier if you weren’t naked.”
Zio glanced down at himself, unsurprised to see he was hard. On the rare occasions shifting wasn’t accompanied by violence or a desperate need to escape the world, it always left him horny. And Devan had already proved the effect he had on Zio’s cock.
He shuddered as another gust of wind rattled through the clearing. His skin burnt where Devan touched him, but it was nothing compared with the need thrumming in his groin. The heat. The desire. The pure power that flowed between them. Gods, I want him.
The certainty of the thought should’ve shocked Zio. Repulsed him. But as need took over his every thought, he felt nothing but overwhelming desperation to feel Devan’s skin against his.
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