by Abby Green
‘My apartment in London, it’s private.’
Where she’d gone with him the night they’d made love. A penthouse apartment at the top of a glittering exclusive building. The last place she should go with him, but suddenly the lure of seeing him again, however briefly, was too seductive.
‘Okay.’
He stepped back and put out a hand for her to precede him to his car. He spoke with the other driver, who left. Sophy got into the SUV.
The journey into town was taken in silence, apart from a couple of phone calls Apollo made. Presumably to do with work. She wondered about Krisakis, how the resort was shaping up. A place she’d never see again.
They pulled up outside Apollo’s apartment building and Sophy recognised it. It was bitter-sweet to have her memory back.
The driver opened her door and Sophy got out. Apollo was already standing on the pavement. Tall and gorgeous. Drawing appreciative glances from passers-by. Men and women.
Before, Sophy would have looked at Apollo and compared herself as someone who would fade into the background but she knew she had to stop taking on that role. The one she’d played with Sasha, allowing Sasha to be the noticeable one.
She was never going to set the world alight but she could own her own space in a way she had never done before.
She walked ahead of Apollo into the building, through the door opened by the doorman. She could remember being here the first time, feeling so awed and excited. Tingling all over. Nervous. She felt as if she’d grown an age since that wide-eyed girl.
Virgin.
The lift took a few seconds and then they were stepping out into the grandeur that Sophy remembered. Lots of glass and plush carpets. Oriental rugs. Massive paintings on the walls. Sleek coffee tables with hardback tomes showing beautiful pictures of Greece and house interiors.
Of course, it had been dark outside the first time she’d been here and now it was bright daylight. And, in fairness, she’d only been interested in looking at one thing. Apollo.
He turned to her now. He’d already shrugged off his jacket and was loosening his tie. ‘Can I get you tea, or coffee?’
Sophy held her bag in front of her. ‘Just some water, please.’
He disappeared and came back a few minutes later holding a glass of water for her and a small cup of coffee for himself. He gestured around them. ‘Please, make yourself comfortable.’
Sophy put down her bag and walked over to one of the windows, which took in the lush green gardens of Kensington Palace nearby. Truly this was a billionaire’s address.
He said from behind her in a slightly gruff voice, ‘You remind me of the night we met.’
Sophy fought to keep the blush down. She turned around. ‘That’s because I was wearing these same clothes. Pretty much.’ The same clothes she’d put on with shaking hands and with tears blurring her vision after Apollo had summarily dismissed her. For being a virgin.
‘How are you doing?’
Sophy’s hand gripped the glass. ‘I’m okay. I’m starting a new job as a receptionist in a central dentist’s office in a couple of weeks.’
Apollo’s blood thrummed with heat. A heat that hadn’t cooled in Sophy’s absence, much to his sense of frustration and a kind of futility.
‘Apollo…what is it you want?’
He might have smiled at that loaded question, but it would be a bleak smile. He put the coffee cup down. ‘I need to be sure…there are no consequences? After that night?’
His gaze dropped to her waist and he couldn’t help but imagine it thickening and growing with his child. Before he could control it, that awfully familiar sense of yearning caught at his guts. No. Not what he was here for. Never that. Not even now.
Sophy blinked. He was so terrified of the thought of a baby that he’d come all the way here to check…again? She read his body language and something inside her curled up. Yes. He was that terrified.
She got out, ‘No. I’ve had my period since I returned to London. I told you it would be okay.’
There was no discernible expression on Apollo’s face and Sophy was almost sorry now that she hadn’t had another answer. To crack that facade.
‘Okay…that’s good, then.’
Except he sounded almost…disappointed. Sophy shook herself mentally. She was dreaming. She put down the glass in her hand and straightened up again. ‘Was that it, Apollo? Because I really should be going now.’
She walked towards him and Apollo caught her hand as she was about to pass him. ‘Wait.’
She stopped. She was so close she could smell his distinctive scent and she had to battle the memories threatening to overwhelm her. For a bleak moment she almost wished she could lose her memory again.
‘Look at me, Sophy.’
Sophy really didn’t want to look at Apollo. She was too full of volatile emotions. He’d only come to make sure she wasn’t pregnant. But he wasn’t letting her hand go. Reluctantly, Sophy looked up. Her pulse quickened in helpless answer to what she saw in his eyes. Desire.
He said, ‘I still want you.’
A sense of desperation and anger that he still had an effect on her made her say, ‘Well, I don’t want you.’
She tried to pull her hand away but he held on tighter. He tugged her towards him, shaking his head. ‘Don’t lie, Sophy. Sasha was the liar, not you.’
‘How do you know? You barely know me.’
‘Don’t I? I got to know you when you were your most genuine self. With no memory to inform you, you couldn’t be anyone but yourself.’
She had never thought of it like that. She was so close their bodies were almost touching. Apollo finally let her hand go. She could have stepped back now but his scent was winding around her, keeping her there like invisible silken bindings.
He brought a hand to her jaw, cupping it. She wanted to turn her face into it, purr like a kitten. She could feel her will to resist Apollo draining away. She’d missed him.
So when he tipped her face up and lowered his head, she let him prove her words wrong. The kiss started out chaste, a touch to the lips, before coming back, firmer, more insistent. Encouraging her to open up to him. After a moment of hesitation she did, unable not to. Apollo swept inside and then she was lost, drowning in a whirlpool of memories and desires she’d tried to ignore and bury in the past month.
She could feel his hands roving over her back, cupping her buttocks. Just before she lost herself entirely, she pulled back, mouth throbbing. ‘Apollo…what are we doing… It’s over… You never wanted to see me again.’
‘This isn’t over.’
She pushed herself out of his arms, immediately feeling bereft. She shook her head. ‘What are you saying?’
‘Why does this have to end when we both still want each other?’
For a wild moment Sophy’s heart soared. ‘How would that work?’
He said, ‘You could move in here, if you like. You said you’re working in central London. I’ll be in London regularly over the coming months as I’ve got a project starting up and I need to be on hand.’
Her heart dipped. ‘You mean…this is just a temporary thing.’
‘Well, for as long as we want each other.’
Her disappointment was so acute that Sophy nearly doubled over. Nothing had changed. He was just looking for an extension of their affair.
Sophy turned and walked back over to the window, not wanting Apollo to see the effect of his words on her. She spoke to the glass. ‘So what you’re talking about is essentially making me your mistress?’
Apollo looked at Sophy’s slender back. He still had the taste of her on his tongue. The feel of her body under his hands.
‘You can call it what you like, I’m talking about continuing this relationship.’
She turned around. ‘But just the physical side of it. And once that’s fizz
led out then we get on with our lives?’
Frustration bit into Apollo. ‘Can you walk away from what’s between us?’
She came closer and to his shock he saw moisture in her eyes. It was like a punch to the gut.
She said, ‘No, I can’t walk away. But I’ll have to. You see, I want more than that, Apollo. Much more. And, unlike you, I’m not prepared to settle for less.’
Panic gripped Apollo. He felt like he was slipping down a cliff-edge with nothing to hold onto. He said, ‘How much do you want?’
She looked at him, an expression of shock and then disgust crossing her face. ‘No. I’m not talking about money. I’m talking about love. Family. Emotions. All the things you don’t want.’
As if money could buy a woman like Sophy. He felt ashamed. A great yawning chasm was opening inside Apollo—the place where he’d almost lost himself after Achilles had died. When he’d felt so terrified and alone. Abandoned. Sophy was looking at him with those huge eyes, asking him to step into that place.
He shook his head, stepped back. ‘I’ve told you, I can’t give you that.’
Sophy felt her heart crack. ‘Can’t…or won’t?’
She wasn’t expecting an answer, so she stepped around Apollo and walked towards the corridor leading to the elevator to take her back down to reality.
But she couldn’t go without telling him… She turned back and he was looking after her, jaw tight.
She said, ‘I love you, Apollo. I fell for you the night we met. I’m so sorry for what my sister put you through, but I’m glad that her actions brought us together because I might never have seen you again.’
She turned and walked out, hoping stupidly that she’d hear her voice or feel his hand on her arm. But there was nothing. She got into the elevator and the doors closed. It descended. She got out and walked forward and out of the building like an automaton.
She went down into the nearest tube station and followed the crowd through the turnstile, not even sure where she was going. She was numb. But she welcomed the numbness, which was protecting her from incredible pain.
You could have stayed…become his mistress.
She shut the voice out. It would have killed her in the end.
She walked towards the signs for the Bakerloo Line, which would take her back to south London. At the top of the escalator, though, she heard a call.
‘Sophy!’
No. It was her stupid mind playing tricks. She was about to step onto the escalator and it came again, urgent.
‘Sophy, wait. Please!’
She heard a girl near her say, ‘I’ll be Sophy if he wants. He’s gorgeous.’
Sophy turned around. Apollo was standing on the other side of the turnstiles with his hands braced on the sides—as if ready to vault over. Sophy walked towards him, trying not to let a flame of hope spring to life.
He looked wild. She could feel the electric pull between them, even here.
She came closer. ‘I won’t be your mistress, Apollo. I’m not mistress material.’
He said, ‘I don’t want you to be my mistress, Sophy…just come back over here, please?’
Sophy was aware of a crowd gathering. People whispering. Slowly, she walked over to the exit turnstiles and came back through. Apollo had tracked her progress from the other side, his eyes never leaving hers. He was waiting for her. Big, solid.
Sophy knew if he asked her again she wouldn’t have the strength to say no. She knew she was weak enough to clutch at any more time he would give her to be with him.
She stopped in front of him and he put his hands on her arms. ‘I’m sorry,’ he said.
‘For what?’
‘For disrespecting you. And for the ten seconds too long that it took me to remove my head from my—’
A public announcement blared at that moment, blocking out Apollo’s words, but Sophy could guess what he’d said.
She was too full of trepidation to let the bubble of euphoria she felt rise up inside her. ‘What are you saying, Apollo?’
‘I’m saying that it’s too late. Any hope I might have had of protecting myself against the pain of losing you—letting you go in Athens, trying to make you my temporary lover—is well and truly shattered. Because I would prefer to spend one more perfect day with you, if that’s all we have, than a lifetime of regret because I was too much of a coward to admit my fears and open my heart.’
Sophy heard someone sigh near them, but Apollo filled her vision. And her rapidly swelling heart. ‘Are you saying…?’
‘That I love you. Deeply, irrevocably. Infinitely. I fell for you the moment you looked at me for the first time but I didn’t know it at the time. All I knew was that I had to have you.’
He tugged her towards him. ‘Please…don’t walk away from me. Give me a chance.’
Sophy shook her head. Suddenly she was the one who was scared. She whispered, ‘I can’t do this, Apollo. It’ll kill me if you’re just saying this to get me back in your bed.’
He kissed her then. In the middle of the concourse of one of London’s busiest Tube stations. A deep kiss, full of remorse and pain and…love. A promise.
They broke apart and Apollo looked at her. They were oblivious to the crowd that had formed around them, phones raised.
‘All I can do is ask you to trust me. I do want more. You’ve made me want more, and I’ve denied it to myself, or tried to, but I can’t any longer. I want you, Sophy, and I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you give me a chance to prove that to you?’
A voice nearby said loudly, ‘If you won’t, love, I will!’
A giggle of pure emotion burst up from Sophy’s belly. Along with hope…a hope that she couldn’t push back down. She smiled a wobbly smile. ‘One chance.’
His eyes burned like dark emeralds. He took her hand and raised it to his lips. ‘One chance is all I need.’ He took her hand and led her back up, out of the dark underground and into the light. The sunlight made everything shimmer. It felt like a benediction. A new start. And Sophy took a deep breath and let herself trust.
Sophy looked out over the sight of the city waking up to a brand-new day under a pink dawn. She was wrapped in a voluminous robe and her body felt pleasantly lethargic and sated. She’d left a sleeping Apollo on the bed, his brow smooth in sleep.
She was still trying to absorb what had happened and she couldn’t help but feel slightly fearful that it had all been a dream. Or had she projected her love onto Apollo so much that she’d heard what she’d wanted to—and he hadn’t actually made those declarations…
‘Here you are.’
She tensed against his inevitable effect on her, but it was useless when his arms slid around her waist and he brought his body flush with hers. He said into her ear, ‘When I woke up just now, and I was alone in the bed, I thought I’d dreamed it all up. That you were gone.’
Sophy turned around in Apollo’s arms and looked up at him. ‘I was just afraid of the same thing, that I’d imagined it all…that you hadn’t said—’
‘That I love you?’
She nodded her head, biting her lip.
‘Well, I did. And I do. I love you, Sophy Jones. And if it’s all right with you, I’d like us to marry as soon as possible.’
Her heart skipped a beat. ‘Was that a proposal?’
He looked worried. ‘I can make it more romantic if you like…’
She shook her head and smiled. ‘No, that’ll do just fine. And, yes, I accept your proposal.’
But then she sobered again. Apollo tipped her chin up. ‘What is it?’
She put her hands on his bare chest. He’d pulled on sweats but she had to not let his physicality distract her.
‘What I said about a family… I meant that. I do want a family. Children. When you reminded me that we hadn’t used protection…for a moment, even t
hough it would have been the wrong thing, I wanted there to be a baby.’
He cupped her face. ‘I told myself I didn’t want there to be a baby and that’s why I was so concerned about consequences, but actually I think deep down I was hoping that you might have got pregnant. I had to come to terms with the thought of a baby when I thought Sasha was pregnant and what surprised me was how much I wanted it. In spite of everything I’d been telling myself for years. Except, in that situation, I compartmentalised the baby very separately from its mother.’
‘But now…with you… I want it all too. The baby, you. Us, together. Making a life. It scared me for so long, the thought of losing someone I love, so I blocked it out. That’s why I was so harsh with you after we slept together that first night. I knew you’d got to me more than any other woman ever had. So I used your virginity as an excuse to get you to leave. But I never forgot about you…and I think eventually the memory of you would have driven me so mad that I would have come to find you.
‘But then your sister turned up…and I was relieved I hadn’t had to be the one to make a move. Until I realised I no longer wanted you. And then Sasha dropped her bombshell. I told myself I was glad I didn’t desire you, because then it meant what we’d shared couldn’t have been as amazing as I remembered…but then that all got blown out of the water…’
Sophy looked at him, finally believing and trusting. But he said, ‘Need more convincing?’
She nodded and started moving her hands down to his waist. His body hardened against hers. ‘Maybe a little more…just to make sure we’re on the same page.’
Apollo scooped her up and carried her back into the bedroom and put her down on her feet by the bed. He undid the belt of the robe and tugged it off her body. His green gaze glittered with barely banked heat as it swept up and down her body. He muttered, ‘I will never get tired of looking at you, little flame. Or wanting you.’
He kissed her then and she arched into him, pouring all of her love into the kiss. His sweats got discarded and they landed on the bed in a tangle of limbs. When Apollo was poised to enter her, Sophy put her hands on his hips. He wasn’t wearing protection. She said huskily, ‘Are you sure…it’s not too soon?’