by Rona Halsall
Dean swallowed, his face screwed up in anger. ‘Our daughter, used in some sick plan? Is that what you’re saying?’
She nodded, and he glanced away, eyes focused on the wall behind her. She could almost see his thoughts whirring and decided to give him time to process what she’d just said.
‘It’s my fault,’ he said, eventually. ‘I caused the accident.’ He glanced at her, blinking back tears. ‘What you’ve just told me about sweets being doctored, it makes sense. The whole thing had been puzzling me and I was trying to talk it through with Kate when we were on the motorway but she was being so horrible about you and I said she wasn’t being fair and then we got into this big row and Mia was screaming and I didn’t see the car in front pulling in until it was too late.’ He paused for breath, his voice cracking when he continued. ‘I swerved at the last minute, lost control and we went down the embankment.’ His face crumpled and his shoulders shook. ‘It’s all my fault.’
There was nothing Becca could say.
‘And you’re wrong. Me and Kate… we’re not together.’
40
Becca scanned his face for signs that he was lying, but all she could see was regret deepening the grooves at the side of his mouth.
He sighed. ‘Worst decision of my life. I said I’d give her a lift to London because I had to go and visit a client anyway. She said she’d keep an eye on Mia for me if I helped her find an apartment. She had a few lined up to view. It was a win-win for both of us.’
She narrowed her eyes. ‘I don’t think Kate saw it like that. I think she probably saw it as the beginning of something.’ Her hand went to her pocket and she pulled out the earring. ‘I found this next to our bed. Dad seemed to think it’s Kate’s.’
He ran his tongue round his lips, his gaze dipping. ‘I’ve no idea how that got there.’
She huffed, satisfied now that she’d been right. ‘Oh, I think you do.’ She leant towards him. ‘Don’t you think it’s time to stop playing games?’
She watched the blush colour his cheeks. ‘Okay, okay.’ He sighed. ‘You’re right. She came round to see how I was doing. We got drunk and started talking about old times and…’
‘Yeah, like that’s an excuse,’ Becca hissed. ‘I know the history between you two. Dad said your relationship was on–off. “Volatile” I think was the word he used.’ She could hardly speak through her anger. ‘It would have been good to know about that before we got married. How come I never knew you two had even been an item? Why didn’t you tell me?’
He still couldn’t meet her eye, and when he finally spoke, his voice was so quiet she could hardly hear him. ‘I didn’t want you to think I was marrying you just because you were pregnant.’
‘But you were,’ she said, the truth obvious to her now. ‘That’s exactly what you were doing, wasn’t it?’
He stroked Mia’s hair. ‘It’s complicated. I wanted to do the right thing.’ He blew out a long breath, clearly struggling to admit the truth. ‘I desperately wanted a family. Kate had never been keen – that’s what our fights were about. That’s why I ended it with her. I was ready to settle down; she wasn’t.’
There was a familiarity about his story that struck Becca hard. Isn’t that just the same as me and Connor? One wanted to settle; the other wasn’t ready. The question was what to do about those unresolved feelings. All she’d done was talk to Connor, whereas Dean had broken the bond of trust by sleeping with Kate.
‘Our relationship was never about me, was it? It was always about having a baby.’ She shook her head. ‘You never really loved me. That’s the truth, isn’t it? It’s always been Kate.’
‘Of course I loved you. Honestly, Becca, you’ve got to believe me. But… well, me and Kate…’ He pressed his lips together, obviously debating with himself how much to say.
Loved. Past tense. The hurt stabbed through her heart. ‘You might as well be honest with me now, Dean. Don’t pretend there’s nothing going on.’
He looked at her then. ‘You want the truth? You and me, well, we don’t have a great deal in common any more, do we?’ He glanced down at his sleeping daughter. ‘We have Mia, but over the last year, I’ve come to see that’s not enough. I’m sorry, Becca. I really thought we could make it work, but…’
He blinked, adjusting Mia’s position on his knee.
‘A year?’ Her voice was louder than necessary, but she couldn’t contain her fury. ‘You and Kate have been seeing each other for a year?’
‘I don’t know,’ he mumbled. ‘It may be that long.’
Her jaw clamped shut. This was not the place to let loose with the rage that was burning her throat. Mia had been upset enough, and she wasn’t going to disturb her peace. This was, however, an opportunity to take control.
When she finally spoke, her words were crystal-clear, her demeanour ice-cold. ‘So, this is what’s going to happen. I’m taking my daughter and going home to our house. You can’t look after her with a broken hand, and I’m sure you want to stay with Kate, given you’re the one who put her here.’ She handed him the keys to Frank’s car. ‘You can tell that scheming father of mine that I don’t want to see him again. We are over. Done. And after this, we’ll see what the authorities have to say about access.’
She picked up her things and gathered Mia from Dean’s arms without any resistance. His shoulders were hunched, his head hung low, but she couldn’t feel sorry for him, not when their life together had been built on a lie. When he’d almost destroyed her.
Bastard, bastard, bastard. It was the only thought in her head as she found her way to the reception area.
She checked Google Maps on the iPad and headed out of the hospital towards New Street station. She’d get a train home. Mia liked trains; she’d be excited rather than scared once she woke up and understood what was happening. The station was two miles or so. Forty minutes to walk. She hitched the dead weight of her daughter a little higher and told herself it didn’t matter how tired she was – she could do it. If that was what it took to make her way to freedom, she could definitely do it.
And then what? the voice in her head asked.
She had to get away from her toxic family. Start again.
But what about the safeguarding team? They’d never let her be with Mia. She had to get to the police. Give them the evidence. Then they’d have to believe her.
‘Becca! Becca!’
She turned at the sound of her name, astounded to see Ruth running towards her from the direction of the hospital. ‘Thank goodness I caught you.’ Ruth was blowing hard after her dash to catch up and she put a hand on her chest, taking a minute to get her breath.
Becca stared at her, thoroughly confused by her sudden appearance.
‘Frank called and told me about Kate’s accident,’ Ruth said, still breathless. ‘He sounded in a bad way, so upset. And when he said Mia had been in the car too, well, wild horses wouldn’t have stopped me from coming. I had to make sure my little girl was okay, and Frank said he’d like me to come because you’d disappeared, and he hadn’t a clue what was going on.’
‘Wow, that’s above and beyond the call of duty. I didn’t know you two were so close.’
Ruth’s brow crinkled. ‘I had to make sure Mia was all right. Poor mite must have been terrified.’ She put a hand out to stroke Mia’s cheek, but Becca moved away before she could touch her. If Ruth was in Frank’s corner, could she be involved in some way?
Ruth’s face fell, and she seemed genuinely distressed by Becca’s action. Guilt poked at Becca’s heart as their eyes met. She’d always relied on Ruth, had trusted her completely with Mia. Can I trust her now? She wasn’t sure and held Mia a little tighter, as if Ruth was going to snatch her from her arms.
‘Kids are amazingly resilient, aren’t they?’ Becca said and kissed her daughter’s head, glad she was asleep – if she’d been awake, she would have wanted a cuddle with Ruth, and then things could have become very difficult. They definitely had a strong bond, and when Mia wante
d something, she could be incredibly determined.
Ruth didn’t reply, her mind fixed on her own agenda and her eyes fixed on Mia. ‘Frank was asking for you. I’ve been searching all over the place, then Dean turned up in the ICU and said you might have left.’ Ruth frowned, disapproval written all over her face. ‘I can’t believe you’re walking out on your poor dad and sister.’
Becca’s jaw clenched, hating the way she was being judged. ‘You really don’t know who you’re dealing with, Ruth. It’s Kate and Dad who’ve been poisoning Mia. I’ve got evidence. I can’t speak to him. Not now.’
Ruth gasped, her hands flying to her mouth. ‘No. I don’t believe it.’
Becca turned to walk away, but Ruth grabbed her arm.
‘You can’t just throw that at me and not explain.’ She softened her voice. ‘Come back inside. Let’s go and get a drink in the warm and you can tell me. Perhaps I can help.’
Becca wrenched her arm from Ruth’s grasp, but the tussle had disturbed Mia, whose eyes flickered open, and as soon as she spotted Ruth, Becca knew that her choices were limited to one. The chance of a quick escape had gone.
Doesn’t matter, she reassured herself. The trains wouldn’t be running yet. And maybe Ruth could help. Reluctantly, she followed her inside, Mia wriggling to get down and give Ruth a hug. They walked with the little girl between them, each holding her hand. For a moment, Becca imagined a different version of reality, where instead of Ruth walking beside her, it was her mum, and they’d been able to enjoy her child together. It reminded her that, in terms of support, Ruth was all she had, and she obviously loved Mia with all her heart. She wouldn’t harm Mia, would she?
It was impossible to know what or who to believe. Watch and listen, she cautioned herself. Then she could decide. But being on permanent high alert was exhausting, and after a day that refused to end, she was tired to the bone.
Back in the café, Ruth bustled around getting coffee from the machine and a drink for Mia. Becca observed as she interacted with her daughter, noticed the gentle patience.
‘I want those sweets,’ Mia said, pointing to some jelly bears.
‘No, I’m sorry, I’m not buying those. Remember what I keep telling you? Sweets are bad for your teeth? I will never buy you sweets, so there really is no point asking.’
‘Please,’ Mia wheedled. ‘Dandad gives me them.’
Becca’s eyes widened as her daughter confirmed what had only been suspicion up to now. But who would believe a three-year-old child? She couldn’t be counted on as a reliable witness.
‘How about these cheesy biscuits,’ Ruth said, already putting the money in the machine and pressing the buttons. ‘You like those, don’t you?’
Mia clapped her hands as the machine whirred and the packet was magically delivered to her. She held it up for Becca to see like she’d won a prize, and Becca gave her the thumbs up as she came running back.
Something else about the exchange lodged in Becca’s brain. Ruth’s insistence on something savoury, the refusal to buy sweets. In her heart, she couldn’t believe Ruth would harm Mia. And looking back, there’d been no problems with her daughter’s health while she’d been in Ruth’s care.
I’ve got to trust somebody.
When Ruth came back to the table, and Mia was busy feeding her biscuits to her toy unicorn before popping them into her own mouth, Becca told Ruth everything she knew, her voice a frantic whisper as if she couldn’t rid herself of the words fast enough.
Ruth’s expression hardened as she listened, and she punctuated Becca’s narrative with little intakes of breath and tuts, completely focused on what she was saying.
‘Well, he’s not getting away with it,’ she said when Becca had finished, her face flushed with anger, clearly horrified by what she’d just heard. She pulled her phone from her bag.
Becca frowned, a surge of panic wiping out her weariness and putting her on alert again. ‘Wait… what are you doing?’
‘I’m calling the police.’
Becca’s breath caught in her throat. ‘No, you can’t. Please. I don’t actually have any proper evidence. It’s all circumstantial and could be explained away.’ Her fear at the consequences was making her heart race. ‘It could even be made to point the blame back at me, and that would make everything a whole lot worse.’ Her thoughts galloped on towards the inevitable consequences, her breath coming faster, as if she was running. ‘They’ll find out about the safeguarding order and take Mia off me. Then social services will be crawling all over us and I might never get her back.’
Ruth stopped what she was doing and leant across the table, patted Becca’s arm. ‘That’s not going to happen,’ she said, firmly. ‘Mia is not going back to your husband. He’s in no fit state with a broken hand, is he? I know they won’t let you have her until they’ve followed their investigation through to the end. But I can take care of her while all this gets sorted out. I am her childminder after all, and my house is geared towards young children. Perfectly safe.’ She nodded as if confirming it to herself. ‘Continuity of care, that’s what they’ll be after.’
The seconds ticked by as Ruth googled the number for the local police on her phone. Becca’s heart was doing palpitations again and her hand went to her chest. Had she made a terrible misjudgement? Was she about to lose everything?
‘Nobody would notice if you came to stay with me as well,’ Ruth said, flapping an impatient hand, and Becca knew then that she’d got it right. Ruth was on her side. Her only ally. Her shoulders sagged with relief as Ruth carried on talking. ‘Details. These are details we can sort out.’
Ruth leant across the table, speaking in a conspiratorial whisper. ‘The thing is, I’m a witness. I saw Frank giving Mia sweets.’
Becca’s mouth fell open. She had a witness, a proper adult witness, and that was exactly what she needed.
‘That’s right,’ Ruth continued. ‘I saw him. He sort of did it on the sly. I don’t think he knew I spotted what he was up to. Obviously, I didn’t approve because I don’t ever give the children sweets. But he’s her grandad and I don’t know him that well, so I thought you must have said it was okay.’
Becca let out the biggest sigh, her heart dancing a strange jig as she watched Ruth make the call to the police.
It’s going to be okay, she told herself, hardly able to believe this might be the end of her troubles. She pulled Mia on to her knee, holding her child close.
Epilogue
Exactly one year after the accident and Frank’s subsequent arrest, Becca woke feeling excited. She could hear the murmur of voices out on the veranda – Mia chattering and Connor answering, laughing at something she’d said. They were staying with his mum, Jackie, who ran a bed and breakfast not far from Connor’s property outside Darwin. She’d insisted they stay with her, even though it was the middle of the dry season and she was busy with visitors. Connor was basically camping on his plot of land while he slowly built his house, which was definitely still a work in progress and not yet fit for guests. Jackie had been a wonderful hostess, warm and friendly and completely smitten with Mia, making the whole trip so much easier than she’d thought it might be.
Becca had a quick shower and got dressed in her T-shirt and shorts, a warm breeze filtering through the house, silky soft against her skin. The guest house, like many in the area, was built of wood and perched on stilts, designed to catch a breeze and stay cool in the humid conditions. It was basically a block of bedrooms in the middle, with a wide, covered veranda on four sides providing the living space. It was set in verdant gardens with all manner of wildlife scampering around and fluttering in the canopy. Mia was bewitched by the place, especially the colourful birds and butterflies, and Becca thought she’d have trouble when it was time to go home.
‘G’day, mate,’ Connor said as she appeared at the breakfast table, a greeting that always made her feel warm and fuzzy because it was true – they were definitely mates. She sat down and took the glass of orange juice he’d poured f
or her. ‘Mia says she wants to go and see the crocodiles today.’
Becca looked over at her daughter, who was flipping through a picture book full of Australian wildlife, her favourite book of the moment. ‘Really?’
‘I thought we could go to Kakadu National Park.’
It was a place Becca had yearned to see, teeming with wildlife, but getting Mia there could be an issue. ‘That’s quite a drive, isn’t it? You’ve seen what she’s like in the hire car.’ She’d made the decision to have her own transport while they were in Australia, just in case things got awkward and she wanted to strike out on her own. Even a year after the accident, Mia still hated getting in the car, and Becca had tried to keep their adventures local as much as possible to prevent unnecessary upset.
He grinned at her. ‘She says she’d like to go in the truck.’ Connor had a massive four-by-four vehicle that would get him through any sort of terrain, and Becca supposed it didn’t really seem like a car when you were in there. More like a tractor and definitely safe. ‘I said I’d have to ask because little girls aren’t normally allowed in trucks but she says she’s a big girl so it will be okay.’
She smiled. He always knew how to tip situations on their head to get the better of Mia’s contrary nature. ‘Well, I’m definitely up for it. We’ve only got another few days, so it’ll be good to make the most of it.’
The excitement dimmed in his eyes and he pulled a face. ‘I hate this talk about you going.’ He reached across the table and held her hand. ‘These three weeks have gone in a flash, haven’t they? I can’t tell you how much I’ve loved having you both here.’
She swallowed and studied the garden, not trusting her voice.
Her reason for coming to Australia had been very specific, and although they hadn’t talked about it, she knew they were both in the same situation. Having been in touch with him again, and having talked to him for a year now over video chats, she had to know how she really felt – and that could only be confirmed face to face. Had it been true love, or had it been a wonderful interlude that she was now romanticising and should be relegated to the past?