But what about him? Was he staying because of the needs of three people, regardless of his own preference? No, he answered honestly. The warmth of this family group gave him something he hadn’t known he’d missed until now. He loved the sharing, the confusion, even the squabbles. Somehow he’d tolerate the restrictions on his sex life. Somehow.
* * *
Without discussing the need to do so, Zach and Diana concentrated with even more fervor on their work and chores around the house. On the morning following the incident with Jenny, Laurie cornered her classmate and delivered her rebuttal. In the days that followed, the Thatcher dinner table became the scene for regular updates on the tentative rebuilding of Jenny and Laurie’s friendship. Within a week Laurie appeared with a big smile, obviously bursting with good new.
“You’ll never guess what Jenny’s having,” she said with a grin of triumph.
“Here comes the Jenny report,” Allison droned, winking at Zach.
“Be nice or I won’t tell. And you’ll shrivel up and die of curiosity. Then you won’t be able to go, either.”
“Go where?” Allison’s expression became animated.
“Well…” Laurie paused for effect. “Jenny said today that she’s having—”
Laurie’s announcement was cut short by a sudden crash and the sound of loud barking and squawking from the backyard.
“Mozart!” cried Allison, leaping up from her chair.
“Chopin!” Laurie echoed, racing after her sister.
Zach exchanged a look of alarm with Diana and followed the girls out the back door. The yard was strewn with enough frizzled feathers to stuff a good-sized pillow, and more were rapidly accumulating as the chickens alternately escaped and were pounced upon by Beethoven. The birds ran in crazed circles, while the cocker spaniel barked joyfully at finally getting to play with the creatures that until now had lived frustratingly out of reach. The chicken coop lay on its side, the door sprung open by the impact of its fall.
“Beethoven, no!” Allison lunged for the dog and managed to wrap her arms around his squirming body. “Bad dog!”
Laurie chased one chicken, while Zach and Diana tried to corner the other. Any progress the girls had made in taming the birds was lost as they fluttered and dodged away from the hands that reached for them.
“Al, take Beethoven into the house and bring us two bath towels,” Zach directed. “Don’t get pecked, Diana.”
“Chopin’s gone completely nutso!” Laurie wailed, making another grab for her pet.
“Wait, Laurie,” Zach said. “Okay, here comes Al with the towels. You take one, and I’ll take the other. Diana, you and Al herd them in our direction, and when they’re within reach, we’ll each throw towels over their bodies and pick them up.”
“Okay,” Diana agreed, circling behind the squawking chickens. “I don’t know if I’ll be much good at this.”
“Just remember how Lassie did it in those old movies on TV, Mom,” Allison suggested, creeping cautiously around in the other direction.
“Do I have to bark?” Diana said, and Allison giggled.
After several attempts they managed to blanket the chickens with the towels and carry the birds back to their cage. The door was refastened and the coop righted.
“That was a great trick,” Allison said. “I thought you didn’t know anything about chickens, Zach.”
“I don’t,” he admitted. “One of my friends had a parrot, and that’s how he caught it.”
“I’m going to wring Beethoven’s neck,” Laurie said.
Zach studied the chicken coop. “Don’t blame Beethoven. The supports for the cage weren’t strong enough.”
“Sure they were,” Allison defended them both. “We did a super job.”
“I’m afraid not.” He sighed. “Look, you two may as well know something I’ve already confessed to your mother. I’m not very accomplished as a handyman.”
Allison and Laurie exchanged glances, and then Laurie spoke. “We know that.”
“You do?” He faced Diana. “You told them?”
“No, I didn’t.”
“Mom didn’t have to tell us,” Allison said. “We figured it out.” She shrugged. “But we don’t care.”
“You don’t?” He stared at them incredulously. “But if I’m not any good as a handyman, what use am I around here?”
Allison scraped the toe of her sneaker across the grass then glanced at him shyly. “We just like you. You’re fun. I mean, Laurie and I aren’t really of any use, either, but I know Mom likes having us around. It’s the same thing.”
“No, it’s not,” he argued. “Your mother loves you. You’re her children. I’m…” He trailed off in confusion and appealed silently to Diana for help. She just smiled mysteriously. He glanced again at the girls, and a funny lump rose in his throat. “Thanks, kids,” he said gruffly and opened his arms.
Allison and Laurie ran to him and hugged him enthusiastically. Over the tops of their heads he looked at Diana, and the glow on her face reached something deep in his soul. If the girls hadn’t been there, he would have wrapped his arms around her and kissed her senseless. He couldn’t have prevented himself.
“Well,” he said, releasing the girls, “what was the great announcement you had, Laurie?”
“Oh! I almost forgot. Jenny’s invited both me and Allison to a slumber party this Friday night. Isn’t that neat?”
Eight
Diana gulped. “That’s—that’s wonderful,” she said, sneaking a glance in Zach’s direction. He looked as if he’d been struck by lightning. They’d never considered the possibility that both girls might be gone overnight. Diana racked her brain for a similar circumstance and decided this hadn’t ever happened before. Laurie’s friends hadn’t included Allison or vice versa.
Allison gazed at her sister in disbelief. “Jenny wants me to come?”
“Sure. Besides, I asked her if you could.”
Allison’s mouth dropped open. “You did?”
“Why not?”
“Uh, I dunno,” Allison hedged, obviously afraid she might ruin the entire miracle.
“So then you’re coming, right? That is, if Mom says we can go. Can we, Mom?”
Diana’s mind whirled. “Next weekend? Let me see. I don’t think we have any plans.”
“Of course we don’t have any plans,” Laurie said. “I mean, we don’t exactly have an active social life.”
Diana smiled in an attempt to hide her distraction. “True.” After the first flurry of invitations following Jim’s death, the calls came less and less frequently. She and the girls kept to themselves. She occasionally had lunch with some of the wives of the couples she and Jim had known, but that was about it.
“So we can go?” Laurie persisted.
“Yes, you can.” Diana didn’t dare look at Zach as a mixture of excitement and fear coursed through her. How would she handle this unexpected turn of events? Could she handle it?
“Wow! That’s freaky!” Allison exclaimed, racing for the house. “Come on, Laurie,” she called over her shoulder. “What’s Jenny’s number? We have to tell her right away we’ll be there.”
“I’ll dial it,” Laurie answered, running to catch up with her sister.
“Are we supposed to take sleeping bags or will a pillow be enough?” Allison’s excited voice grew dimmer as the girls disappeared into the house. “I hope everybody brings music, and then we can…” The sound of her animated chatter faded away, leaving Diana and Zach alone in a deep well of silence.
Zach cleared his throat. “Allison sure is happy about being included.”
Diana stared at the screen door that had banged shut behind the two girls. “Yes.”
“Diana.” His voice compelled her to turn and face him. “I’m not made of steel, and neither are you. How in hell will we—”
“We just will, that’s all,” she interrupted, not wanting to hear their dilemma stated out loud.
“You’re going to stay in your room,
and I’ll stay in mine, for the entire night? Diana, I have enough trouble keeping my hands off you when the girls are here. My God, sometimes I imagine I can hear you breathing down there below me, and I think of that thin nightgown you wear and that ripe body underneath—” He clenched his fists. “The girls are the only reason I’ve held back. If I know they’re gone…” His blue eyes blazed with frustration.
“We can’t sleep together, Zach, and chance ruining everything,” she said, her shoulders tense.
“Or gaining everything,” he said. “Is this slumber party a gift to us? The girls would never have to suspect what had gone on while they were away.”
“No.” She shook her head, her voice surprisingly steady. “The risks are too great.”
They stood in silence, their gazes locked, until he finally glanced away. “I know.” He sighed. “But a guy can dream.” He turned and walked into the house.
“So can a woman,” she whispered.
* * *
With each day that brought them closer to Friday, Diana’s inner conflict grew. She didn’t think Zach would appear in her bedroom, but if he did, if he touched her even once, she feared that she’d be consumed by the passion that gripped her as surely as it did him. He wasn’t the only one who listened for breathing in the night.
Still, she couldn’t rid herself of the belief that one night of lovemaking, even if they could keep it secret from the girls, would be dangerous and volatile. A sexual union with Zach had the power to upset the delicate fabric of the relationships in the house. She was afraid to risk it. Perhaps she’d simply lock herself in her bedroom.
On Friday afternoon she heard Laurie and Allison bustling in the front door, and she waited for them to burst into the kitchen to look for her. Instead they headed immediately upstairs, murmuring intently.
She smiled to herself as she finished scrubbing the sink and dried her hands in preparation for her first music student. But her heart wrenched a little. The girls had been so absorbed in each other that neither of them had bothered to greet her. She welcomed the new sisterly closeness, but she couldn’t escape the uneasy feeling that soon they wouldn’t need her at all.
As she set up the music stands for the Bad News Brass, she considered for the first time the shape of her days once Allison and Laurie left home. In less than six years they both might be living in college dorms or sharing apartments with friends. And she would be…alone in this big house.
“Mom?” Laurie stood at the foot of the stairs. “Could you come here for a minute?”
Diana crossed the room. “Can’t you find the other overnight case?”
“No, it’s not that. We found both cases. It’s Al. She’s got the cramps.”
“Allison?”
“Had to happen sometime,” Laurie said with a little smile. “I was about this age, if you remember.”
“But Allison’s still so…” She clutched the newel post. Her baby? Her last baby?
“I think you’d better talk to her, Mom. She’s furious.”
At that news Diana’s initial shock gave way to amusement. “I bet she is. Right before the big slumber party. It is rotten luck.” She started up the stairs. “Is she in her room?”
“Uh-huh. I gave her the necessities, and I told her to take aspirin. The cramps will probably be gone by tonight, but she’s still complaining that life’s unfair.”
Diana mounted the stairs and walked down the hall to Allison’s room. She tapped on the door. “It’s Mom.”
“Door’s open.”
Allison lay on her bed curled into a ball with her face toward the wall. Diana stepped over the books and clothes littering the floor and sat on the edge of the unmade bed. “Laurie tells me you’re not entirely happy with the turn of events.”
“Who would be?” Allison continued to stare at the wall.
“In some families they throw a party when this happens. After all, today is very important to you. You’re growing up.” She stroked Allison’s bright hair and felt a lump rising in her throat. Allison would become a beautiful woman, probably marry some terrific guy and have her own children, but she would never again be Diana’s little girl.
“Phooey on growing up,” Allison mumbled. “I only wanted to get my hair cut. Try out some of Laurie’s makeup. I didn’t want this.”
“Well, Allison,” Diana said with a smile in her voice, “some things can’t be controlled in this world, and you’ve just discovered one of them. Besides, now you’ll really fit in with Laurie’s friends. I remember last year they had a big contest to see who would be first.”
“They did? That’s dumb.”
She put her hand on her daughter’s hunched shoulder. “Allison, it’s not so bad,” she said softly. “You’re very lucky to be a woman. Women can have children. And if you do, I hope he or she brings you as much joy as you’ve brought me.”
Allison lay very still and then in one wild motion she flopped over and threw herself into her mother’s arms and held on tight. “I love you, Mom.”
“I love you, too, honey.” Diana rested her cheek against Allison’s hair and prayed for the strength not to cry.
“I just don’t feel ready to grow up.”
“I know. But everything doesn’t have to change. You’re still allowed to watch cartoons on Saturday morning and play Monopoly until you drop.”
She glanced up, a mischievous gleam in her blue eyes. “And tease Laurie?”
Diana laughed. “I assume from that crack that you’re feeling better.”
“Yeah. Thanks.” Allison smiled and wriggled out of her mother’s arms. “Think I’ll practice my drums until it’s time to go.”
“And I think I’ll close your door.” Diana rose and walked out of the room. An energetic beat followed her down the hall, and she knew Allison had decided to accept her fate with typical bouncy optimism. She smiled. Allison’s sunny outlook on life did bring joy to the house. But Allison wouldn’t always live here.
For the next half hour Allison’s drum practice, Laurie’s radio and the Bad News Brass filled the air with noise. For the first time Diana realized how much she cherished the racket and how empty her life would be without it. Before, she’d been so immersed in raising the girls that she’d taken one year at a time, like a hurdler in a race. Today, unexpectedly, the finish line had appeared on the horizon.
One of these days she’d be middle-aged, a quiet music teacher living alone in an old house in a respectable community. She’d fix Sunday dinner for her daughters and their families. She’d work on charity drives. She’d—
“Excuse me, boys,” she blurted out, right in the middle of a measure. “I’ll be back in a second.” She raced into her bedroom while three pairs of eyes peered after her.
She flipped on her bedroom light and studied herself in the dresser mirror. Tiny lines that had definite ambitions to become crow’s feet spread faintly from the outer corners of the silvery eyes Zach had praised so much. She parted her hair, the dark curls that supposedly drove him crazy. There, just above her right temple, she found it. A gray hair.
Fumbling in a drawer for tweezers, she yanked the gray hair out by the root. “I’m not ready for this,” she mumbled to her reflection, then made a face as she realized Allison had said the same thing to her. And what had been her wise and wonderful reply? Some things can’t be controlled in this world, and you’ve just discovered one of them.
“Bull,” she muttered and returned to finish the boys’ lesson.
Later, as she drove home from Jenny’s house, she reached automatically to switch off the girls’ rock station. Her hand stopped halfway to the knob before returning to the steering wheel. The music had a pounding beat and a suggestive lyric sung by a deep male voice. She wondered what Zach would think of the song. Zach. He hadn’t come home by the time she’d left with the girls. Would he be there now?
He wasn’t, and her crazy rock-music mood deflated immediately. Perhaps he’d decided to make life easier for both of them and had fou
nd other quarters for the night. She couldn’t blame him for wanting to avoid the situation entirely.
The house was achingly quiet, and she tuned the aging stereo in the living room to the same rock station she’d heard in the car. Twisting the volume knob upward, she tried a few tentative dance steps. Jim had been strictly a ballroom-type dancer, and once she’d met him she’d given up the wild sensuous movements of the more modern steps. But she hadn’t forgotten them.
The skirt of her lavender-print dress swirled around her knees as she swung her hips in time to the beat and clapped her hands. “I’ll show you middle-aged,” she announced to the blaring stereo as her movements became more abandoned. “You can keep your charity drives, too,” she cried, whirling around the room. “And I may not be home for Sunday dinner!” The music stopped, and the jovial voice of a disc jockey advertised a special at a fast-food restaurant.
Breathing rapidly, she walked to the stereo and turned down the volume. She straightened, pushed the damp hair away from her face and smiled to herself. She felt better. Thirsty from all the exertion, but better. She started toward the kitchen for a drink of water and froze. Zach was leaning against the door frame, his arms crossed over his chest.
“How—long have—have you…” she stammered.
“Long enough to know I’ll have to fix my own Sunday dinner.”
“I’m so embarrassed.”
“Why? You’re a good dancer.”
“I used to be, when I was younger.”
He looked up at the ceiling. “Here we go again.” He pitched his voice into a quavering near-falsetto. “Fetch my cane, sonny.”
She put her hands on her hips. “Go ahead. Make fun of me. I bet you can’t imagine what it’s like to find your first gray hair or the first stage of wrinkles.”
“Not true. The barber told me last week that I have lots of gray hair, but it doesn’t show much in blondes. My family is prone to early gray. And all that California sun has taken its toll, in case you hadn’t noticed. The clock ticks for me, too, Diana.”
“I hadn’t noticed. To me you look young and vibrant. Gray? Really?”
“Want to see?” He took a step forward, and their aloneness suddenly imprinted itself forcibly on her.
The Fix-It Man Page 10