Without thought of consequence I remove my earbuds, stand up, and make my way over to the alluring siren of serendipity. I sit in the empty seat in front of her and do something I never thought I would ever have the constitution to do—I start a conversation with a complete stranger.
“Hey, sorry to bother you but can I ask you about that book you’re reading?”
“Oh, yeah, sure. It’s an autobiography of a politician.”
“Oh, neat. Which one?”
“Max Montblanc. You know him?”
“Yeah, that’s the guy that’s gonna be running for PM, right? I didn’t know he wrote a book.”
“Right. Well, it actually hasn’t been released yet. I have an advance copy for work.”
“Cool, what do you do?”
“I write for the Herald. I’m supposed to have a review of it ready to go before the actual release.”
“Oh, the Herald! Very cool. So, is it any good or what? Any first impressions?”
“Well . . . can you keep a secret?”
“Sure I can.”
“Okay, well, it’s going to get a really bad review from me.”
“Oh . . . It’s pretty bad, is it?”
“Well it’s actually really well-written, which is kind of surprising.”
“So why a bad review then?”
“Because Montblanc is evil. He’s bad for this country. It’s not a coincidence that this book is getting released right before a federal election campaign starts. He’s probably hoping that this book is going to be good publicity for him, but I’m not going to give him any help.”
“Ohhh.”
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to get all political on you there.”
“No, that’s okay. So, you’ve probably read and reviewed a tonne of books, huh?”
“Quite a few, yeah. They got me on a pretty rigorous schedule there but I enjoy it.”
“So can I ask for your honest, professional opinion on something?”
“Yeah, okay.”
“It’s about an idea I had for a book. But for real, you have to tell me what you really think, don’t pull any punches.”
“Okay, hit me with it.”
“Alright . . . So, what would you think about a book where a man is recruited to ghostwrite the memoirs of another man, like a famous and powerful man.”
“Is that it?”
“That’s it. The whole book is just about the one guy writing the book for the other guy.”
“Sounds pretty awful to be honest.”
“Yeah, you’re probably right. Nobody would ever want to read something like that.”
Panegyric Page 21