by Tara Brown
I could’ve choked him. Instead, I climbed in the front seat, working hard at refraining from hugging Luce.
“Soooooo,” she grinned, “who had fun at basic?”
“Not me,” I admitted. “So bad. Worse than I remember.”
She hit me in the arm. “You need to toughen up, marshmallow.”
“Owww!” I rubbed my arm and pointed. “Drive.”
She chuckled. “Don’t get too excited. We’re a ten-hour drive from the house. Get comfy.”
I gave her a desperate look. “What?”
She nodded. “Gotta make sure we don’t leave a trail. It was this or Canada.”
I pinched the bridge of my nose the way Coop always did. “I don’t want to talk about it. Just drive.”
Ten hours in a car with Jack and Luce was similar to driving with my kids. Annoying music, drive-thru food, bickering about who was in what movie, and Jack kicking my seat an awful lot. I did my turn driving, tuning them both out. Finally, when I was about to bitch for the hundredth time, Luce pointed. “Right here.”
“Right?” I stared at the sign for the town and frowned. “Jamesville? Where are we?”
Luce shrugged. “Montana.”
“Oh my God.” I took the right, trying not to lose my mind. The town was tiny. Larger than a village but way smaller than a city. I couldn’t stop staring at the quaint little houses and shops we passed as I drove in. “How many people live here?”
“Eight thousand,” Jack answered nonchalantly.
“What the hell are we going to do here? We’ll stick out like a sore thumb.”
“No, we won’t.” Luce laughed. “You’re a stay-at-home mom. Coop, your brother, owns the new horse tack hut, and me and Jack are a married couple who own the computer store.”
“Where are my kids?”
Luce glanced at me. “They’re at the house you just bought. Your mom picked it out.”
“Great. Which way?”
“Go left at the end of this road. We all live on the same street.”
The landscape was beautiful, trees and mountains and rolling hills and God knew what else. It was stunning. But it was the mountainous version of Mayberry.
I turned left and headed into what seemed like farm country, driving away from the mountains. We were surrounded by hills, but they were still nice and big, giving the sense of being safe and enclosed. The trees weren't big, but they were beautiful and broke up the fields. Away from the mountains the sky was as far as you could see in every direction, not like Boston where the horizon was the ocean or small hills, trees, and buildings.
I drove until I saw her face.
They didn't have to tell me which house was mine.
My mom was standing on the porch of a beautiful country home, looking as anxious as I felt. I parked and jumped from the van, arms open wide. Mom ran to me, draping her arms around me. I trembled until the small fingers of Jules’ hand crept into the embrace. I spun, wrapping around my children. Jules pointed. “The house has an attic upstairs, Mom. It’s kind of creepy but I like it.” I held back my tears, not wanting to scare her since she seemed so casual about it all.
But Mitch clung to me. “You were gone so long.”
“I know,” I said. “I’m so sorry. I thought it would go faster.” His fingers dug in.
“It was just enough time to set up so it’s ready for you.” My mother pointed, sounding cheerful. “It’s exactly as you asked, a beautiful home where the kids can grow up with horses, bunnies, and dogs.”
I gave her a look to let her know she wasn't helping.
“Mom!” Mitch was plainly bummed. “I don’t want to live in Montana. This is the middle of nowhere.”
“I know,” I repeated, rubbing his head and seeing his father in his face. “Sweetie, this is better for us. I promise.” He gave me the same look I’d just given my mother.
Dropping to my knee, I reached for Jules. “How was your birthday?”
“It wasn’t the same without you, but Grandma gave the girls Monster High dolls and Madison Mitchell was so jealous. She said she’s going to give them out too at her birthday and her mother said it was excessive.”
My heart was broken but I laughed. “I’m sure she did.” I smiled earnestly at my kids. “Guys, our little family needs this. Uncle Coop, Aunty Luce, Uncle Jack, and us, and Grandma—we need this. A new start, where we don’t have to think about how sad we are about Daddy and how sad we are about everything else. This is our fresh start. Okay? Can you try for me?”
They both hesitated and then nodded. I pulled them in and hugged them again, kissing each cheek before I looked up at the huge white farmhouse. “How old is it?”
“It’s not.” Mom gave me an annoyed look. “It’s new. I know what you’re like about old houses. It’s three years old and built to appear old fashioned.”
“Wow.” I cringed. “They succeeded.”
“Oh, for heaven’s sake.” She groaned. “Come inside and see the place before you judge it. You are so like your father.”
I wrapped my arms around Mitch as Jules ran to catch up to my mom, bursting through the door. “Mom, come and see my room. I got all new stuff ‘cause of the fire.”
My heartbeat lessened with every step we took. This house could be a safe place for my mom and my kids. It wasn’t fancy like my house—my pile of ashes—but it was nice. The kitchen was much nicer than I had expected with granite counters and white country cabinets. It was old fashioned and modern meeting in the middle. The floors were maple and the trim was all wide crown molding. It was a nice home.
“Who bought this?” I glanced at my mom. “Did I buy it? Do I own it?”
“Yes.” She nodded. “You do but the records of who actually bought have been—altered.” She added awkwardly.
“Oh.” It was settling inside me, the idea that I was okay. I still imagined maybe a bomb would be dropped and we would all be dead, and I wouldn’t be able to do anything to stop the attack. It was an impotent feeling. I hated it.
Mom reached for my free hand. “Darling, you’ll get used to this. This house will become a home. We have state-of-the-art security.”
“Yeah.” I could have almost cried, especially when Mitch peered over at me. “I can’t believe we have nothing from our old house. I can’t believe it burned up.”
“I know, baby.” I didn’t have anything for him but a hug. “I can’t either. Seems like it's been such bad luck lately.”
He met my eyes skeptically but said nothing.
I finished checking out the immaculate first floor and climbed the stairs. It had four bedrooms up, and one of them had Jules in it, jumping up and down. The room was adorable with pink-and-white lace curtains and matching comforters. It was very girlie.
The bed was built into the wall to make it look like a tree house, with the closet below for extra storage. There was a second closet on the other side of the room. Jules climbed the wall ladder. “See, Mom? Look, it’s a tree-house bed.” Her face was split wide with joy. I almost cried, but I knew where I needed to cry and her bedroom wasn’t it. I nodded, holding back too much. “This is amazing. I’m so excited you love it. Grandma did such a good job picking out a house for us.”
Jules giggled. “I helped.”
“You did amazing too. Want to show me the way to my room?”
She climbed down quickly and raced down the hallway to the master suite. It was huge and no doubt already bugged. I contemplated the spots he would’ve put them. Damned Coop.
The bathroom was glorious with a huge soaker tub and everything I’d need to be happy if I were a regular mom with regular kids and regular problems. But I wasn't. And this wasn't Boston.
It was Montana?
I never saw that coming. I had to be honest with myself and admit I wasn’t happy and might not be for a long time. But gazing around, I wondered if maybe I could be.
Happy was safe kids. And my mom and Sissy.
The rest would have to work itself out. After
the tour, I walked down the hall to Mitch’s room. He was already on his bed with headphones on, playing Minecraft. He looked miserable.
“What's up?”
“Nothing.” He gave me a frown. “I have no one to play with. Jack erased all my other data. I have no friends or anything. He said 'cause you had to go back to work for the government, we have to say goodbye to our old life. You don’t even care about us, you just want to have your old job back.”
“Hey”—I knelt next to him—“that’s so not true. I care about you which is why we have to change things. And school starts in two days. You’ll have new friends, I promise you that.”
“Yeah.” He rolled his eyes. “Whatever.”
It was one of those moments where I wanted to smack him upside the head for giving me the eye-roll “whatever,” but I knew he was right. I had done this to him.
His father and I had been part of a life that never suited raising children, no matter how hard we wanted to justify it as a possibility.
“Did Grandma tell you I'm switching back to my CI name? The one I used when I was undercover.”
He snarled, “Anything to be rid of the memory of Dad, huh? You'd rather have a fake name than his?”
It stung that I was taking the blame for it all. I was the cold widow who didn’t give a shit about my husband being dead. “That’s not why. I'm back to work. Your father is gone and I have to have a job, Mitch. Evie Evans needs to be gone. You know the work we did. It was all top secret. And your dad’s pension won’t even pay rent on an apartment in Boston.”
“So.” He scowled. “I don’t care.”
“I love you.” I gripped his hand. “You need to remember that, okay? You and Jules.” I kissed his head, got up, and walked back to my room. The way he had pulled back, disgusted with my kiss, picked at me.
I shouted down the stairs, “Mom, I'm hitting the shower. Okay?”
“Sure, dear. I'm making muffins and cookies anyway.”
I smiled, desperate for the smell of her baking to fill the house and make it ours. When I got back into my bedroom, Ralph was chilling like a villain on my bed, purring and doing his laundry. I knelt at the bed, stroking his soft fur. “Hey, buddy.” He seemed to be of the opinion the new house wasn’t such a big deal. “At least you’re happy to see me.” He gave me a cat look, one that suggested he didn't care if I was there or not.
I turned and shuffled into my bathroom, stripping only when the door was closed. I climbed into the shower, sat on the floor with my legs pulled into me and let the water rain down on me. It couldn’t rain fast enough though, the tears flooding my eyes were blinding. I cried until I couldn’t because there was nothing left inside me.
5
It’s Steve! Nope, still not scary.
In a constant state of shock that we lived in friggin’ Montana, I waved as I drove past Mom mowing the grass. Our yard was more of a field. She was all kinds of excited about the lawn mower she could drive as if she was at a racetrack and not a yard at all. She even had a glass of chardonnay the first time she mowed it.
I drove to the elementary school and parked down a block, on the road. I grabbed my coffee and headed up the street to the park where I climbed into the gazebo and sat. It overlooked her window. I didn’t know how long I’d sat there staring at the schoolhouse, but when the lunch bell rang, my butt was completely numb. I pushed myself to my knees and watched as the kids ran out into the schoolyard. My heart fluttered until I saw her. Jules was alone, no kids running and playing with her, until a blonde girl walked up. She pointed at the monkey bars. Jules nodded and followed her. I sighed with relief. She had made a friend.
“Hey, champ. You want some more caffeine to add to the unimaginable amount you already have in there?”
There was no avoiding the smile when I heard his voice and turned to see something that almost gave me heart failure. My jaw dropped and a noise slipped out, not a good noise.
Seeing my face made him smile wide and cheeky.
Shit. “What are you wearing?” I was almost offended at how hot he was.
He glanced up at the cowboy hat on his head. “What? This? We're in Montana, Evie. These small towns are the same as the military—fit in or fuck off. You know, F-I-F-O. We talked about this.”
“Screw you.” I scowled. “And for your information, I Googled that and it's a food safety acronym for ‘first in, first out,’ not a military term.” My eyes wandered down him like a lazy river. The dark cowboy hat and the blue eyes combined with the stubble and those lips, gahhhh! He was sex on a stick.
Jesus, help me be strong.
But adding to the sexy cowboy theme, he wore a white tee shirt that hugged his chest and arms, arms I decided in that moment I wanted to bite. The belt buckle was the dirty icing on the ‘Evie can't have this’ cake. I felt like a raven staring at the shiny object, entranced by its location and size. The tight jeans were too much. I could see birthmarks and his religion in them.
Sighing, I snatched the coffee from his huge hand and peered back at my kid on the playground, praying I didn’t just orgasm from sexy-guy overload.
“What?”
“Nothing.” I shook my head. “Why are you all local yokel?”
He nudged me. “Evie, believe it or not, my parents have a ranch. I've always been a bit of a cowboy. Montana was my choice. I love it here. Big skies, rolling hills, farms, and simple people who are kind and will always help a neighbor out. Besides, I'm the new owner of the tack shop. I am the cowboy riding expert.”
"I thought you were from Hawaii." I avoided the cowboy comment.
"I was."
My face flushed with color as I realized I couldn’t contemplate him or where he was from while fighting the good fight and keeping my eyes to myself. His arms and jeans and that fucking belt buckle were in my peripheral.
Shit.
“You okay?” He started to laugh, “You’re being so weird!
“What?” My voice cracked. “No, uhm yeah. I’m just tired.”
A lady crossed the street in front of the school and made her way through the park gate. She started to laugh when she got closer. “Oh my goodness. I thought you all were some high schoolers.”
“Who? Us?” I chuckled and gave Coop a grin. “Not me.”
"Oh my god." He scoffed lightly at me but smiled at her. Even my heart melted when I saw his smile. She blushed as he walked to her. “Hi, I'm Jon Stapleford. We just moved here.”
I walked out of the gazebo, dusting myself off and trying to get blood flowing back into my legs. “I'm Evelyn Rolland. This is my brother—”
“Her”—Coop cut me off—“her brother's friend. How are you?” That wasn’t the story. He was supposed to be my brother.
She ignored me completely and giggled, becoming a forty-year-old schoolgirl as she twirled her hair and batted her eyes at Coop. “I'm the librarian across the road, Ms. Daniels, but you can call me Sarah.” She gave me a knowing look. “The high school kids skip out and come here and do things in the gazebo. The little kids see them—it's not good.”
“Oh.” I cringed. “Yeah, we were spying on my daughter. She’s over there on the monkey bars with the blonde.”
She glanced over, smiling. “Jules. Of course, sweet girl. Such a great athlete too. The gym teacher was telling everyone how amazing she is.”
“Oh yes.” I beamed, thinking about the major lack of things to do here. “Yes. She’s big on sports, always has been. She and her brother.”
Sheila stared at Coop for a couple of seconds longer and only backed away slowly when the bell rang. “Well, it was nice meeting y'all. Have a great day.”
“What are you doing?” I turned to Coop. “Brother's friend?”
“What?” He grinned. “I don't want to confuse finding you attractive with being my sister. See ya later.” He winked and stalked off, leaving me stunned and speechless.
Shit.
What did that even mean?
I left and stopped at the local co
ffee shop before driving over to Jack and Luce's to see the store. I carried in the tray of coffees I'd bought for us and sat them on the counter. The store was small but very cool and high tech. Luce beamed. “Hey, how's it going?”
“Great.” I cocked an eyebrow. “I mean, since the last time you were spying on me.”
“Dude.” She grabbed a coffee. “We're neighbors now. That is the polite way to greet someone.”
“Right.” I laughed. “I'm on my tenth cup of coffee today and doing great, Marcy. How are you?”
“Awesome.” She wrinkled her nose. “Fucking hate the name Marcy.”
“It’s not that bad.” Jack walked in with a smile, as always. “At least your name isn't Vince. I sound like I might be a plumber.” He took his coffee from the tray. It was the extra large. No one else drank that much coffee, not even me. That was saying something.
“So”—I glanced at her—”have you seen Coop?”
“Oh have I.” She winked. “Whew, those Wranglers never suited a human being more.”
“Right!” I scoffed. “And that buckle is obscene.”
“Perverts.” Jack wrinkled his nose and pointed at the back of the store. “He's in the back. He just got here. He can hear us.”
“Of course he is,” I added as the devil himself came around the corner. I fought my smile and turned to Jack. “What's the orders from all the various people in our lives?”
Jack smiled. “Well, the group, that shall not be named, is curious about the house fire. They’re not excited about that and think we need to cover our tracks and stay here on the down low for a while. They figure whoever is trying to kill Evie, and maybe all of us, will get more desperate and accidentally reveal themselves while searching. They suspect whomever James was working for that your dad and Servario didn't kill, put the hit out and will get sloppier and sloppier the longer they cannot find us. Even the Organization doesn't know where we are. I have a means to contact them but it's protected. We are fully off grid with plants waiting for the slip up to happen."