by Logan Jacobs
“Oh, boy.” I rolled my eyes and looked back at my daughter. “Dare I ask what he’s doing?”
“He’s re-enacting your victory against the orcs,” Marella explained. “The one where you brought back all the long-legged women with you and killed all the wargs.”
Well, now I had to see this.
“You guys make yourselves comfortable,” I said to the Coonag women as Marella and I headed toward Arrick.
As we got closer, my ears were assaulted by what could only be described as the cracking voice of a boy going through puberty. It was like the kid had eaten an entire bag of peanuts, which were then constantly getting lodged inside his throat and cutting off his voice as he talked.
That said, he was totally into the performance.
“And that’s when my father sliced off the head of the Warg and painted the sands of the beach with his blood!” Arrick called out as he made a slashing motion with a nonexistent sword. “Take that, you evil bastard! And that! And also this! Haaaa!”
“Hey, now!” Careen warned. “What did your mother tell you about saying that word?”
“I’m sorry,” Arrick apologized as he looked downward like a kicked puppy and frowned. “I just got carried away with Dad’s story.”
“It’s alright, kiddo,” I chuckled as I walked up to the group. “I don’t think it’s humanly possible for me to have a child who isn’t constantly swearing. I’m pretty sure it’s written into our DNA. I loved the show, though.”
“Daddy!” The boy’s eyes went wide as he saw us, and then he pushed through the crowd and threw his arms around my leg.
My other three children greeted me at the same time, so I gave each of them a pat on their heads as they grabbed onto my leg like a bunch of koala bears.
“Gods, you guys have gotten big.” I grinned as I ruffled the tufts of red hair on my twin girls.
Lizzie and Amaria were now about the size of kindergarteners, but their bodies were still growing into their green scales, which hung off their torsos loosely like a shirt two sizes too big. Their blue eyes were wide and bright as they hugged me, and it warmed my heart to the core to see Sela in their features.
Oshuna, my child with Careen, was on my other leg. The tan, orange-eyed girl was slightly younger than her twin siblings, but she was still growing faster than any human child I’d ever seen.
Careen watched the scene with pure bliss plastered on her burgundy-scaled face, and I couldn’t help but let my heart swell with pride that I had so many people in my life who cared about me.
Just then, the most aromatic, sweet smell hit my nostrils, and it was monsoon season in my mouth.
A bunch of the dragonkin women strutted out of the kitchen with platters in their hands. They began to distribute the individual plates to everyone in the room, and my kids got really excited for the prospect of dinner.
“That smells yummy!” Oshuna licked her lips. “Mommy? Can I have two plates?”
“You most certainly may not!” Careen chuckled. “I know you’re a growing girl, dear, but Blaclaws are a scarce resource.”
Oshuna hung her head, kicked the sandy ground in frustration, and then stomped back over to her mother.
“There you are,” Sela suddenly called out from behind me, and then the dragonkin woman ran over and scooped up Lizzie and Amaria. “There are my babies!”
“Momma!” they both exclaimed with glee as the warrior woman lifted them up into the air.
Even though Sela was about as battle-hardened as they come, she practically melted when she was in the presence of our beautiful twin daughters. Pure joy spread across her face as she threw the girls up into the air and caught them, and her usual stoicness melted like snow in the spring.
Finally, after a few tosses, she set the girls down onto the ground and took their hands.
“Come now, girls,” the green-eyed woman announced. “Dinner is about to begin.”
“You should probably go take your place by your mother, too, Arrick.” I nodded up toward Nerissa.
“Do I have to?” the boy sighed. “I’ve already spent a lot of time with her while you were gone.”
“Arrick Whitfield,” I warned. “You know the drill. You’re a prince, which means you’ll be the leader of these people someday. Which also means you have to put on the theatrics for your people, and they love seeing their future ruler up on that dais, dining with his mother and father.”
“So, are you coming, too, then?” Arrick questioned.
“Not today,” I explained. “Unfortunately, your father is in diplomat mode right now. Next time, I’ll definitely be up there, though.”
“Alright, alright,” the young boy conceded, and then he turned and ran away to the front of the courtyard.
“I’m really glad I don’t have to worry about all that royal stuff,” Marella confessed. “I’ll stick to soothsaying any day.”
“And you’re a damn fine soothsayer, if I do say so myself,” Jonas’ soft voice observed as he walked over. “So fine, in fact, that your mother wants you to meet our new Coonag friends.”
Marella waved goodbye to me happily, and then she followed the old sage over to where her mother was sitting.
I looked around for a bit to see if there was anywhere I could pop a squat, somewhere that would allow me to try and bridge the gap between the three different species…
As if the gods themselves had read my mind, I eventually saw an opening at one of the tables at the far end of the courtyard. Lezan, Trin, and Nadir sat across from the dragonkin twins Zarya and Darya, as well as Ainsley and Theora.
So, I sauntered over to the wooden table, pulled out the handmade straw seat, and plopped down.
“I hope you don’t mind,” I announced as I scooted in closer. “It looked like you guys needed some company.”
All of the women at the table smiled in response, and a few of them even looked down bashfully.
“It would be an honor, my king.” Darya smiled, and I gave her golden body a once-over.
“I didn’t mean to interrupt,” I reassured the ladies. “What were you guys talking about?”
“We were just talking about our homes,” Lezan explained as she ran her fingers through her black-and-white hair.
“This is our home now, Lezan,” Nadir reminded her friend in a hushed whisper.
Lezan gave Nadir the side-eyes, but Trin quickly interjected.
“Our old home,” the gray-haired raccoon woman corrected. “Lezan, Nadir, and I were all telling these nice women about the island we came from, about its scenery and the way we lived in underground tunnels and hollowed-out trees.”
“It’s fascinating,” Ainsley admitted, and the deer-woman’s azure eyes glinted with intrigue. “Did living underground protect you from the orcs and the wargs? Because we had to constantly move around to avoid detection, mostly because the wargs’ sense of smell was so powerful.”
“I’m afraid we never really encountered any wargs.” Nadir frowned. “Are you saying there are evil creatures out there that are even more deadly than the orcs? Ones that are their allies?”
“Not really ‘allies,’” I explained to the racoon woman. “The wargs are like slaves to the orcs, beaten and tortured into doing whatever fucked-up things their masters want them to do.”
“They’re dreadful.” Theora, the pale, black-haired deer-woman shuddered. “They have long, gangly arms and pointed snouts with large ears and razor-sharp teeth. They can run almost as fast as we can…”
“It’s strange they never set these ‘wargs’ on us,” Lezan observed as she narrowed her black eyes. “If these creatures are as deadly and wild as you claim, then I would have figured we’d have encountered them by now.”
“You’re right,” Nadir pondered aloud. “Why wouldn’t they send these creatures out to every single island to do their dirty work? It’d save them a lot of hassle.”
“Wargs are primal creatures,” I theorized, “but they aren’t that bright. If I had to guess, it�
��s because the orcs viewed Ainsley and Theora’s people as less of a threat, and they didn’t want to waste any of their best resources on you guys.”
“We were pacifists when Ben first met us,” Ainsley clarified. “We refused to even fight back against our attackers, let alone kill them.”
“So, the orcs let their wild, ravenous beasts loose to hunt on your island,” Lezan noted. “No risk, no loss.”
“It’s a shame they didn’t try it with us.” Nadir’s gray eyes lit up with macabre excitement. “The Coonag people would have torn them to shreds! I hope to one day encounter one of these ‘wargs,’ just to see if they’re more challenging than those orc simpletons we’re used to dealing with.”
As we chatted, the dragonkin servants wandered over to our table and began to set the plates down before us. On each one was the body of a crustaceous animal about the size of a pineapple, with a dark blue shell that shone like it was made out of sapphire, as well as a pile of potatoes.
Upon closer inspection, I saw the animal had five stubby, fat legs that ran along each side of its oval body, which itself came to a circular, apple-sized face. There were dead, dark eyes on each side of the creature’s head, as well as a few tendrils that stuck out of the top of its noggin and drooped around the sides. From what I could see, the only mouth it had was a tiny, bristle-filled pinhole. It’s back was covered with short spines, and out of its shoulders jutted a set of large, crab-like claws.
This was definitely a Blaclaw.
Even though its appearance was alien, the smell took me back to the days when I was posted just off the east coast. Every now and again, me and the other Guardsmen would dock in Maryland or Maine or Massachusetts and then head into town for a cheap, high-quality seafood dinner. The Blaclaw looked like some sort of lobster-crab hybrid, and it certainly smelled just like those buttery, sweet meals we indulged in.
“How does one eat these?” Theora questioned as she picked up the creature by its back legs. “This shell looks like it would destroy our insides.”
“It would,” Darya chuckled. “That’s why we pull the meat out and then toss the shells back into the ocean.”
“Whoaaaaa.” I raised an eyebrow. “Don’t just chuck them away like they’re garbage. If these things are anything like the crustaceans of my world, they can be used to make good fertilizer.”
“Really?” Ainsley mused as she wrinkled her button nose. “Shells?”
“They’re organic,” I reminded the blonde deer woman. “Which means they’ll decompose just like bones or coconut husks. And, more importantly, a lot of times sea shells have this carbohydrate in them that acts as a natural bug repellant. Now, I don’t know about you guys, but I think that’s something we really, reaaaaallllly need in our compost pile. That water dragon shit might be great fertilizer, but it seems to attract every single bug in a hundred-mile radius.”
The women all giggled at my joke, and then we dug in.
I showed Theora and Ainsley how to shell the Blaclaw by flipping it over and breaking off each leg one at a time. Then I took out my pink stone dagger, sliced its belly open down the middle, and pried back its underside like I was opening a set of double doors.
The inside of the Blaclaw was packed with puffy, nearly-translucent white meat, and my mouth watered as I reached for a morsel. It practically flaked off in my hands, so I quickly stuffed it into my mouth and took in the deliciousness that came with the crustacean.
The meat of the Blaclaw melted in my mouth, and it had a faint, buttery and salty taste to it. I didn’t know how Hali had prepared the dish, but I could see why this thing was a delicacy to the dragonkin women.
Once we’d made our way through the main body of the creature, I showed the deer women how to use their dagger to pop open each of the legs and then harvest the remaining meat from inside.
However, the Coonag women took a completely different approach to their meal. Nadir wrapped both her hands around the Blaclaw’s bottom half, lifted the whole thing up to her mouth, and then sunk her teeth into its head with a loud crunch. She let out a soft growl as she pulled it back and tore the head free from its body, and then the Coonag leader spat the head into the sandy ground like it was nothing. Next, I watched with a mix of horror and awe as she placed her lips against the freshly-made hole and inhaled it like it was a crayfish. Then, when all was said and done, Nadir leaned back and patted her lean belly with smug satisfaction.
Lezan, on the other hand, did something different. The Coonag with the dual-colored hair tore off each leg of the Blaclaw, held it in front of her like a piece of corn on the cob, and then crunched into it with her razor-sharp teeth. Once the shell had been penetrated, she would suck out the meat and throw it down onto the plate.
Last but not least, Trin went all in on the crustacean. She picked up the creature, bit into its head, and swallowed the whole bite, shell and all.
“Um, should you really be eating the shell?” Theora asked with a raised finger.
Trin just shrugged. “You should see the things we eat back home. Coonag stomachs are blessed by the gods, as if they’re made of pure stone. I don’t think there’s a thing in the world that could actually upset our bellies.”
We continued on with our meal as we chatted about our past lives, our histories with the orcs, and what our homes looked like. Soon, the Coonag, the dragonkin, and the deer women were laughing and socializing as if they’d known each other for years.
Eventually, we finished our Blaclaws and potatoes, and the servers brought out a few coconut shell bowls filled with fruit. We wolfed down our dessert quickly, and then Queen Nerissa stood to make an announcement.
“We thank Oshun today for this bountiful feast, as well as for allowing our king to return to us safely,” her voice boomed out across the courtyard. “Thanks to Draco Rex, we now have new allies in this fight against our invaders, allies who will teach us their ways and make us stronger as a people. Three cheers for Ben, our king!”
The people around the courtyard erupted into chants of “Draco Rex!” and I couldn’t help but grin from ear to ear. My people loved me, and I loved them back.
Even though it didn’t seem so great at the time, me being summoned through that ocean wormhole was the best thing that had ever happened to me.
Once the cheering died down, the servers cleared away our plates. I told them about using the shells in the compost pile, so they agreed to save all of the Blaclaw remains and have them taken immediately to become fertilizer.
Afterwards, we partied long into the night. We danced, drank, and told stories until the sun began to set, at which point we set off down the path and retired to our huts and rooms in the palace.
Normally, Talise, Mira, and I slept in the palace, but tonight we didn’t want to leave our new guests alone on the beach. They might have been a tribe of fierce warrior women, but they had no idea where they were going or what sorts of creatures awaited them out in the ocean and jungle.
Most of the Coonag women paired off in the empty huts, but Jira ended up shacking up with Mira, Talise, and me.
The four of us were out the instant we landed in our beds, and the next thing I remembered was waking up to the sound of rustling outside our dwelling.
My eyes shot open as my hand instinctively reached out for my seaglass sword, but it wasn’t there. The belt with my weapon was hanging on one of the hooks in Talise’s hut, far enough away that I didn’t know if I could get to it in time before somebody broke in and attacked us.
Then again, there had been no alarms. If this was an orc attack, the twins or Sela would have seen them coming and alerted us long ago.
Jira slept softly on the grass mat we’d brought for her the night before, and her eyes were glued shut as soft, nearly silent whimpers escaped her mouth. The woman’s bushy black tail was flicking back and forth, and I chuckled at the thought of her having an intense dream.
Mira and Talise were still both curled up, asleep against my body. So, I slowly slid ou
t of bed and took great care to make sure I didn’t wake anybody.
I was hoping this was just a false alarm, but, even if it wasn’t, maybe I could kill the fucker and then get back to bed without anyone even noticing I was gone.
So, I tossed on the belt with my weapons and then slunk out onto the beach. I kept my hand on the hilt of my sword the whole time, just in case some orc or warg bastard decided to jump me.
However, when I got outside, all I found was the voluptuous figure of Lezan. Her ringed tail was puffed out and on edge as she crept toward the edge of the village, but she froze in place when she realized she wasn’t alone. The Coonag woman glanced back over her shoulder and then let out a sigh of relief.
“What are you doing up so early?” I rubbed my eyes as I sheathed my sword and walked over to meet her. “The sun is barely even up yet.”
Even though the Coonag were notoriously early risers, this was premature even for them.
“I’m--I’m sorry.” Lezan shook her head, and her long multicolored bangs flopped like a shaggy dog’s fur. “I didn’t mean to wake you up. I just wanted to stretch my legs a bit, and maybe go on a hunt.”
A wave of fear shot across my body.
“Lezan,” I began, “you don’t know these jungles like I do. There are some really, really dangerous creatures in there. Going hunting alone, in the morning, when nobody knows you’re even gone, is not a good idea.”
“I can handle myself, Ben!” the woman snapped at me, but she instantly recoiled with regret. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to--I just wanted to… I’m sorry.”
“Hey.” I looked into Lezan’s dark eyes as I placed my hand onto her bare shoulder. “What’s going on? Are you alright?”
The look on the Coonag’s face answered “no.” Her petite nose wrinkled as tears filled her dark eyes, and her bottom lip quivered intensely.
“I--It just feels like too much,” Lezan sighed. “But I’ll get over it. I always do. There’s no need to bother you with my stupid problems.”