He checked his legs carefully and then began focusing on his eyes. Merritt entered the ring holding a sizeable medical box, and both men concentrated on the horse. I saw a trailer back into the alley, and Tennyson got out of the truck. My heart was beating wildly as I stood with my hand over my mouth in shock. The horse finally rose, and everyone began to cheer until it drunkenly staggered and needed assistance getting into the trailer. Amylia was beyond consoling, and Royal was talking as he held her tiny face in his hands.
She had the opportunity to ride again with her other horse, but she declined and headed off to be with Georgia. I felt like some bad omen had settled on the family, and I grew terrified for Tennyson. I made my way to the family box, and Miriam saw me first. She nodded to the security guard to let me through and came over to hug me tightly. "Is Amylia okay?" I asked.
"We knew Georgia was sick, but she refused to believe it. I'm afraid she will have a hard time accepting this," Miriam said with her tears.
“So, he wasn’t hurt?” I asked. Miriam shook her head and then turned to show Bethany I was there. I smiled at her and said, “Royal looks great.”
"He's as stubborn as a mule. He is determined to be with Tennyson at finals," she snarled.
“Isn’t it coming up soon?” I asked.
“Six weeks,” she sighed.
Katherine smiled at me, and I nodded kindly, but I refused even to acknowledge Cherry. The event picked up, and when Miriam asked me to join them, I politely declined. She took my hand and pulled me to the steps and behind the chutes.
“Miriam,” I said with a panic, “I don’t want to see Tennyson.”
She stopped walking and turned to look at me. “Oh, I thought….”
“I mean, I do want to see him, but not before he rides. I don’t want him to lose his focus or anything.”
“What the hell,” Royal yelled loudly, and my heart almost exploded in my chest. I looked up slowly to see he was alone and I let my smile form.
“I liked you better when you couldn’t speak,” I laughed.
“Worst months of my life,” he teased. I reached out and hugged him, so grateful he was still on this earth breathing. He spoke into my ear as he held me in his massive arms. “You did quite a number on him.”
“Tell me the truth, should I leave?”
“Depends on why you’re here,” he said honestly.
I tried to come up with all kinds of answers, and each one partially correct, but the only thing I could say was, "I just needed to see him."
“He’s with Amylia, do you want me to take you to him?” he asked.
“Will it mess up his head for his event?”
"Who cares, he's messed up most of the time anyway," Royal said, with a shake of his head.
"I thought he was focused, I mean he's winning and not getting hurt." I couldn't image Tennyson thinking about anything but winning, but he did come to see me perform.
“Yeah, he’s focused, just not for the right reasons. He’s lost his love for the sport and is using it to drown his sorrows. I think it will help when I come back, but now he’s proven he can do it alone and there isn’t much left to prove.”
I knew what he was talking about; I was receiving rave reviews on Broadway, but once I proved I could do it, the passion left. I was just a lonely singer in a vast city, playing a part night after night.
“Take me to Tenn,” I said, and held out my hand.
He led me toward the trailers, and I saw Georgia lying on a bed of hay, with Amylia resting against her neck sobbing. Morgan had various instruments hooked up to the horse, but the mood told me there was nothing they could do.
Royal pointed toward another corral, and I saw Tennyson standing with his back to me, rubbing Man-o-war's head. I walked up slowly and said, "Has he come out of the closet yet?"
Tennyson's hand froze, and he didn't even attempt to turn around. He stood perfectly still, and I began biting my lip as I tried to decide what to say. I noticed how his shoulders started to shake and I pulled my hands against my body to stop from touching him.
“Do you want me to leave?” I finally asked in a tortured whisper. He shook his head back and forth, and I had no idea why he wouldn't look at me or talk to me. I walked over to the railing to look at his face and was shocked to see tears. He turned his head, so I couldn't see him so emotional. “You came to my show?” I asked softly.
He nodded and said, “Yeah.”
"I would have loved to have seen you," I admitted and knew I needed to be clearer, so I added. "I needed to see you, Tenn."
He grabbed me around the waist and pulled me into his chest as he folded his body around mine. It was familiar, and I cried out from the feeling it produced in me. I tightened my arms around him and held him as tightly as I could as he did the same. It was hard to breathe, but I didn't care. I would gladly give up oxygen to be in his arms.
"I was standing here wishing for you, and you're here," he said into my neck. His horse nudged him, and he raised his hand to push him away. "Get your own mare," Tennyson teased.
"Did you just call me a horse?" I asked as I tried to pull away.
Tennyson quickly tightened his arms and said, “Just stand here, don’t speak, just stand.”
I laughed, and he kissed my neck, causing the laughter to turn into moans. I ran my fingernails up and down his back, and he pushed me into the railing to bring our bodies even closer. "I think you have a bull to ride," I reminded him.
"I'll be back in eight seconds," he said but remained to hold me tightly.
"I'll go sit with your family and wait for you, okay?"
He finally pulled back and ran his thumbs over my cheeks and stared into my eyes. “Can you stay the night?” he asked softly.
“Do you want me to hang out with you at the dance?” I smiled.
"No, I want you to make love to me in my bed," he said with a serious expression. My heart went into overdrive, and my knees went weak. I was happier at this moment then I had been in the past three months.
I nodded and said earnestly, “Don’t get hurt.”
“It’s not my first rodeo,” he said, with a genuine grin I remembered.
I headed back inside and passed poor Amylia, so brokenhearted over a sick horse when she had a horse worth over two-hundred grand just waiting for her. I felt foolish for thinking cowboys and cowgirls abused their animals. The bond between them was tighter than I ever imagined.
I joined Miriam in the box and took Merritt's seat. She reached over and took my hand to hold in her own, and I felt loved. Royal returned after a while, and he sat close to the chute to watch every detail of the bull riding.
“Does he have a good draw?” I asked Royal.
“Yeah, descent, it’s a slinger, but he usually blows-up and comes to this side.”
“If you don’t want to tell me, just say so,” I laughed, and Royal turned to look at me.
“Sorry, the bull will try to hit Tennyson with his head when he buckles down in the chute. He knows to watch for it. It is also known for running from the chute and coming to this side to buck. We should get a pretty good look at the action, so cowboy up, Jules.”
"Thanks," I said, and tried to prepare myself mentally; at least it was what I thought Royal was telling me to do.
Russell rode before Tennyson, and I was surprised how much more significant he looked up closely. His arms were bulging with muscle, and his hair was braided down to the middle of his back. He had boyish features and smiled and laughed the entire time in the chute.
Royal watched everything the kid did with fascination. The gate opened, and the bull began bucking immediately. When he went into a spin, Russell seemed to lose his center of gravity and leaned severely but remained on the bull. Royal smiled widely and seemed to relax a bit. Russell's score was only 80, and everyone complained about it being too high.
When Tennyson climbed onto the chute, I began biting my manicured nails. Morgan wasn't there, and I realized it didn't matter since Royal w
asn't able to do anything if Tennyson got in trouble. I inhaled when the gate opened, and the bull hit the barrier before heading to the side rails. Tennyson immediately pulled his feet up and grabbed the rails to get off the beast.
"What happened," I asked.
Royal leaned over to speak to his brother who was only a few feet from him on the rails. “Shit you’re slow, go away hand if he’s coming for the fence.”
"I didn't know if they called the foul," Tennyson barked.
“You didn’t feel the gate hit you in the ass?” Royal asked.
"I didn't hear the horn, you fuc…. Hi, mom," Tennyson called out with a grin and then jumped down from the railing.
“Hi, baby,” she called down to him, and we all laughed.
“I don’t understand,” I said to anyone willing to explain.
Miriam volunteered and said, “The bull hit the gate, interfering with the cowboy’s ability to ride, so he gets a re-ride.”
We waited until the end of the first go-round for Tennyson to get his re-ride. The bull tossed his head as soon as he lowered his weight and I laughed when Tennyson swatted the bull’s massive head with his bare hand, but Royal was not amused. "Cut the shit, and cowboy up," he yelled and turned to his mother in anger. "He's going to do that sometime when the chute opens, and it will cost him."
I chuckled, and Royal gave me a questioning look. "I mean, come on, Royal, he's the All-Around cowboy, do you think he would touch the bull with his free hand without thinking?"
He looked back at his brother in the chute and said, "He makes me nervous sometimes."
I realized how nerve-wracking it was for Royal to watch his brother ride. He wanted him to be perfect, so he wouldn't get hurt, and playing around with the bull made Royal nervous that Tennyson's head wasn't in the game.
The gate opened, and the bull ran into the ring and began bucking hard. I saw the strain on Tennyson's body as he was tossed in all directions, jerking on his arm. When the horn sounded, I watched him pull the rope with his free hand, and the entire thing fell to the ground as Tennyson jumped off the bull.
It turned and lowered its head causing Tenn to run for the railing and a bullfighter to intercept the bull's path. I realized I was gripping Miriam's arm harshly and instantly apologized. Tennyson walked over to pick up his rope and looked at Royal.
“Mid-eighties,” Royal yelled, and Tennyson nodded in agreement.
A score of 86 flashed on the board, and everyone cheered.
I stared at Tennyson as he walked from the arena, his hat low on his head and chaps riding low on his hips. His feet made a noise with each step due to his spurs, and I realized he was right last spring when he told me I would want him badly after watching him ride. The next go-round could not be over fast enough.
Chapter 15
Tennyson and Russell were only apart by one point going into the final go-round the next day. Tennyson didn't seem too stressed and was checking on Amylia when I found him. Miriam walked up to hug her distraught daughter, and I remained back to give them some time alone. Tennyson talked to Morgan for a few moments and then nodded for me to join him as he headed to his trailer.
I purposefully stayed behind him to watch him walk, and he glanced back at me knowingly. I laughed and reached out to swat him, but he spun around and grabbed my arm. "Don't treat me like a piece of meat," he teased.
"Don't act as if you hate it," I challenged him.
“Want to try them on?” he asked.
“Try what on?”
“My chaps,” he said, and smiled at my expression.
I moved in close, so I could speak without anyone hearing me and said, “You have no idea how badly I want you right now.”
“Not half as much as I want you, but I think we should talk first,” he said with a worried look. He opened his trailer door and waited for me to enter.
“You better be joking, I am panting right now and not able to focus on conversation,” I admitted to him.
“Are you here just for sex?” he asked me outright.
I stuttered a bit and felt my face redden. “I didn’t come here only for that,” I said, as I looked at the floor.
He remained quiet for a moment and then admitted, "I came to your show because I wanted to see you succeed in your dream. Is that why you came here?"
I could tell he was trying to understand why I was here, so he would know how to respond. But, I wasn’t even sure why I was here; I just knew I needed to come. I looked at his face, so full of hope, and it bolstered me. “You called my father,” I said nervously.
He took a deep breath and babbled, "Yeah, I jumped the gun. I loved having you at my home, and I assumed you loved it, too. I'm sorry."
"I came because I miss you, and you make me happy. I love you, Tenn, I don't know if I can give up my dreams for you."
His eyes shot open wide, and he said, "I never asked you to give up your dreams."
"I know because we never got that far. Our lives pull us in different directions, and they are never going to mesh."
“Yet, here you are,” he pointed out, and I smiled at him.
“Yes, here I am.”
“My life is pulling me in the direction of a shower, do you think you might be able to join me in that direction?” he said with a sexy grin.
“I think you are going to need a lot of help with that shower, so I better give you a hand,” I smiled.
“Just a hand?” he frowned.
I shrugged at him and said, “We’ll start with a hand and see what happens.”
He began heading to the shower when a knock sounded on his trailer door. He opened it to see Royal excitedly jumping up and down. “You’ve got to come see what I have,” he said with joy.
“Give me an hour,” Tennyson said and tossed his head toward me.
“This can’t wait an hour. You have to come now.”
“I smell like shit, Royal.”
“You always smell like shit, come on,” Royal demanded.
Tennyson looked at me with frustration, and I stepped forward to intercede. "Tenn, jump in a quick shower, and I will meet you at Royal's trailer."
“Life sucks,” Tennyson yelled at me as I headed off with Royal.
“So, what is so important you have to cockblock me?” I asked. “
“I have the video of a lifetime,” he laughed loudly, and I froze in my steps. I couldn’t imagine seeing Tennyson with another woman and felt the blood draining from my face. Royal kept walking and looked back to see if I was coming. He instantly understood my hesitation and said, “It’s not of Tennyson trying to tame the one-eyed monster, don’t worry.”
The relief was overwhelming, and his statement made me laugh. "You are a sick man, Royal Weller," I said, as I caught up to him.
We entered the trailer, and Morgan and Merritt were sitting in front of a computer. I knew it had to be big to pull them away from Amylia's problem. I looked at the screen nervously, but all I could see was someone riding a bull. Royal got everyone a beer, and it was less than five minutes later when Tennyson walked in.
“I hope you washed your balls,” Royal teased.
"I figured you would lick ‘em clean later," Tennyson said to his brother, and Royal turned to me.
“He was talking to you, not me,” I told Royal, making everyone laugh.
"Feast your eyes on a freaking miracle," Royal said to Tennyson and pointed at the computer.
Tennyson looked at the screen, then back at Royal, and then again at the screen. "Where did you get that?" he asked. I thought I heard his voice shaking and I still had no idea what we were looking at on the monitor.
"Some asswipe loaded it. I downloaded immediately and got it all but about the last two minutes. They took it off quickly," Royal said, with his whole body moving in joy.
"What is it?" I asked, and Tennyson turned to look at me, but he eyes never made it to my face. He drew back to the screen.
"Did you see that?" Tennyson yelled moving closer.
“You can counter that by where you plant your spurs,” Morgan added.
I was effectively ignored and finally left the trailer to find Miriam to see if she knew what was going on. I eventually ended up back in Tennyson’s trailer. I picked up the clothes he had quickly dropped on the bathroom floor.
His dresser drawers were still open from pulling clean clothes so quickly, so I refolded some things and put them back. I saw a box in the top drawer and took it out to look inside. I gasped at the sight of a large diamond ring. I stared at it in shock and then quickly placed it back in the drawer.
I left his room and went back to the central area of the trailer as I tried to calm down. I was laying on the couch trying to think when Bethany walked in. "Have you seen Royal?" she asked.
“He was in your trailer with all the guys,” I told her.
“Well, it’s empty now,” she sighed.
“Do you know what’s going on, Bethany? They were all watching a video of some bull ride.”
"I don't have a clue, I wonder where they went," she said and began to leave.
“Can I ask you some questions?” I said, bringing her back into the trailer. She sat down across from me and waited for me to talk. “How did you meet Royal?” I asked.
"I was dating a friend of Royal's, and one night the guy got drunk and beat me up. Royal showed up at my door and told me he would never hurt me and if I would give him a chance he would love me forever. I've never been away from him since."
“Do you feel like you gave up your dreams to marry him?”
“Marrying him was my dream,” she said in her no-nonsense way.
“Do you like living at the ranch?” I asked her.
"Royal is a different person at home. He is calm and relaxed as if the world can't touch him. It is the only place on earth I would raise my child."
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