“Hey, hey! Stop that.” While Conner tried to gently discourage his little friend, Lily’s goat jumped onto his back. “Oof.”
Lily rolled over and giggled, staring up at him as if he hung the moon for her.
I would, if I could afford the moon.
Their yoga instructor tried giving the goats quiet commands, but the animals ignored her.
“Quiet, please,” Pepper whispered. “You’re disturbing my inner peace.”
“Ditto,” Natalie said. Her goat was tucked up on her back like a cat waiting to see if someone was going to pour her some cream.
Lily rolled her eyes. Sprawled on her purple yoga mat, she was the happiest he’d ever seen her. He stared a little too long, committing the moment to memory.
Lily’s goat nibbled the hair at his nape, right above that kink in his neck.
“Oh, no.” He wasn’t goat feed. Conner got to his knees, sending Lily’s goat to the ground. Not that it stumbled. He pulled his T-shirt free from Marty and then stood, helping Lily to her bare feet. He didn’t let go of her hand. “Come on. We’re disrupting their session.”
Lily allowed herself to be led away, whispering, “That was totally worth the bruises those tiny hooves are going to leave on my back.”
“Ditto.” Conner chuckled once more. Wait until he told his mother.
The spa walls were a soft blue. The hallway was edged with tropical plants and filled with soft music. If he’d had on his boots, they would have rung on the white marble, destroying everyone’s Zen.
“Excuse me.” The concierge flagged them down at the end of the hall. “You’re a little early for your mud bath, but we have two openings.”
“Sweet.” Lily lunged ahead like this was a good thing.
“No.” Conner shook his head, digging in his heels and trying to free his hand.
“Ignore Conner.” For someone with grip issues, Lily wasn’t letting go. “He’s a mud-bath virgin. Nerves, you know.”
“It’s not nerves.” Conner ignored the concierge laughing at his expense. “Cowboys don’t do fancy mud baths. We sit in the river if we want to get dirty.”
“You don’t know what you’re missing. Your skin is going to be as smooth as a baby’s bottom.” She clapped her other hand on his wrist and stared up at him with an inviting smile.
If it had been anyone but Big E’s granddaughter and any invitation but to a mud bath...
Conner shook his head. “Cowboys aren’t supposed to—”
“Shhh.” Lily pressed her fingers against his lips.
They both stilled. Her touch was warm, just as inviting as that look she’d given him earlier. If things had been different... If the Rocking H was in better straits...
I’d be holding her right now, kissing her right now, thinking beyond tomorrow.
“Come this way,” the concierge said.
Lily’s hand dropped from his mouth.
Conner let her lead him to the mud room. The way she made him feel inside, darned if he wouldn’t let her lead him anywhere.
The concierge took them to a room with two tubs of mud and a flimsy peach-colored curtain hanging in between. Floor-to-ceiling windows faced the mountains. Anyone who walked by on the grass outside could look in. Not that Conner noticed any foot traffic. But he wasn’t a window display.
“There’s a robe for each of you to put on after you change.” Their attendant gestured toward a small alcove where two thin blue robes hung from hooks. “I’ll knock in a few minutes with a female associate to help you into the bath.” He left them alone.
Conner should have been focusing on Lily. But the room smelled like rotten eggs, and the tubs looked as if someone had stirred them with a baseball bat since the last person had sat in them and made mud pies.
“Is this sanitary?” Conner was having second thoughts, not about kissing Lily, but about their wager.
Lily went to the alcove and pulled another thin curtain across. “The woman who checked us in this morning said they add fresh mud and water from the mineral springs for every client.”
“So you say.” Conner turned his back because he could see her silhouette through the thin curtain. “I suppose we’re all going to smell like this when we get back in the motor home.”
“Cut to the chase, Conner.”
He gulped. “I’m gonna assume they don’t provide us with bathing suits for this bath.”
“Correct.” The sound of Lily disrobing from the other side of the curtain was alarming. In fact, it sounded the same alarms that had gone off the other day when he’d unbuttoned her wedding dress. “I’m going down to my—”
“Cowboys aren’t cut out for spa days.” Especially commando cowboys.
“You are such a coward,” she teased. “My Coward Cowboy.”
He preferred Commando Cowboy, not that he was going to tell her that. “This mud thing. It’s overstepping personal boundaries.”
She yanked the curtain aside, causing him to turn and look. She held her chin high as she tightened the sash of her robe. “You and I are way past most personal boundaries.”
Conner smiled. She was right. Pretty, too. And so far above his pay grade.
“Go on.” Walking toward him, Lily pointed a thumb toward the alcove. “Get in there and strip.”
He couldn’t have moved if his pants were on fire. Lily came to a stop in front of him. If she was wearing anything beneath that thin robe, he couldn’t tell.
Lily tugged at the hem of his shirt. “They’ll be here soon to help us in the tubs.”
His hands had somehow managed to find her hips. His gaze couldn’t be removed from hers. He didn’t care about attendants. If they knocked, he’d tell them to go away. He’d tell them to never come back.
Conner bent to kiss Lily in a slow move designed to allow her plenty of time to stop him.
She didn’t stop him. Her eyes drifted closed and she sighed.
This is trouble, son. You better git.
Conner tensed. Straightened. He let her go and ran a hand through his hair without ever touching his lips to hers.
How did Big E’s voice get in my head?
Did it matter? Disaster avoided. No kiss had been made.
Conner mumbled an apology and escaped to the alcove, yanking the curtain across. The smart thing to do was to exit.
Conner had never been smart. He stripped down and put on the paper-thin blue robe.
The attendants knocked and entered just as he tied his sash.
Conner came out of the alcove and sneaked a glance at Lily. She hadn’t said a word since he’d almost blown his double bonus. She stared out the windows, fingers tangled in the collar of her robe, dark blond hair spread across her shoulders.
The mud-bath personnel wrapped their hair in stretchy towels and applied mud to their faces. Then they gave them instructions regarding how to enter the bath without scalding themselves in the hot mud, standing nearby in case an assist was needed.
The key to successfully avoiding mud burns was to lower oneself inch by inch. Conner took his position on the other side of the curtain from Lily. He should have been worried about the voyeurs in the room. He was more concerned with Lily. This would probably be his last chance for a private conversation to explain why he couldn’t kiss her before they all climbed back into the motor home.
“Wowzer.” The sucking sounds from the other side of the curtain indicated Lily was taking the plunge. “These are some hot springs.” She heaved a sigh. “Okay, cowboy, get in so we can peel back the curtain and have a discussion without a barrier between us.”
Without barriers? He needed those barriers.
Conner lowered himself into the tub, sinking down and stretching his legs slowly. “Whew, doggy. You ain’t kidding. That’s hot.”
An attendant drew the curtain that separated their tubs aside,
and then they were left alone.
Their eyes met.
She was in the mud bath up to her neck. She had a twisty towel around her hair. Mud covered her slender neck and her face.
“You look hideous.” And that summed up his technique with the ladies.
“Right back at you, cowboy.” Lily tilted her head back and smiled. “Now, this is my path to inner peace. A nice hot bath and a gorgeous view.”
Conner nodded. Much as he’d like to sit back and relax, he had to clear the air. “About what almost happened earlier...”
“If you apologize for something that didn’t happen, I’m going to get out of this tub and leave you here.”
Conner’s mouth went dry.
“I’m guessing my runaway-bride status is why you didn’t kiss me. I know I shouldn’t feel anything for another man so soon,” Lily continued quietly. “But I do, despite the fact that I was supposed to be married by now. And because of that, I feel like there should be penance and Hail Marys.”
“Are you Catholic?”
“No.” She turned her face toward him. “But they get all the good guilt resources.”
He chuckled and then remembered he had little to laugh about. “I shouldn’t admit that I like you, too, Lily. As a Blackwell employee, I can’t cross that line.” No matter how much he wished things were different.
“There’s a right time for everything, I suppose,” Lily said, voice filled with regret. He nodded solemnly.
“Change of subject. I’m proud of you for doing goat yoga and getting into the tub, Conner. What an adventure, right?”
She was the adventure, not that he could say that.
“City experiences. Go figure,” he said instead. Just wait until he told Tyler Blackwell about how people paid to sit in mud. Ty was always looking for ways to make the guest ranch experience unique.
“And it’s not over yet. When we’re done here, we get to shower.” The tease had returned to her voice.
“We?” How much was he going to be tested today? He tried to wiggle his toes, barely moving beneath the thick, hot mud.
“I’ll shower first,” Lily told him. “And alone to save your tender sensibilities. Now enjoy the view.”
How could he when all he could think of was Lily getting out of the tub...?
CHAPTER TEN
IDAHO WAS FULL of bad-decision bars.
But Pepper had done her homework when she and Big E had planned this trip. She wanted to go to Rustlers, which was the kind of place you entered at your own risk, especially if your vaccinations weren’t up-to-date.
Rustlers had once been a place where Idaho Falls locals had come to belt out off-key karaoke and let their hair down. Now that the tourists had discovered Rustlers, it no longer lived up to its reputation as a place to show one’s wilder side. But it was still talked about enough that there was cachet in putting it on a road trip.
Conner and Lily hadn’t talked any more about the almost-kiss or the intimacy of taking mud baths together. Truth be told, despite Conner reinforcing the boundary between them, it felt like the line had been smudged. Maybe it was because Conner’s neck was no longer kinked, and despite soaking in mud, his skin had never felt so clean. Rustlers was nothing like a spa—not as clean, not as open, not as quiet—which might have explained why he wasn’t looking forward to their visit.
Lily edged toward Conner as they entered, looking anxious. “Have you been here before?”
“Once or twice. Back when there were nightly brawls.” Those were the days when he hadn’t known when to pick a fight and when to walk away.
Pepper and Natalie made their way to the bar. They were styled to attract attention, having spent hours getting ready for the evening’s festivities.
“We should stay with them.” Lily made to follow.
Conner steered her toward a booth on the side instead. It’d been built on a raised platform so diners could eat and look out over the dance floor, pool tables and bar. “We’ll see them and all the action from here.”
“We don’t fit in here. We should go.” Lily still looked nervous, but she also looked lovely. Pepper had brushed her hair and braided it from the base of her neck. The bride-to-be had also worked her makeup magic. Lily looked as sophisticated and polished as any city girl, although Conner preferred her natural beauty.
“Big E wanted me to let the ladies have their fun. We won’t stay long.” Conner ordered two bottles of beer, a basket of curly fries and a postcard from the waitress.
“Beer on tap is cheaper,” Lily pointed out, ever the penny-pincher, practically shouting to be heard over the rising chorus of a classic rock anthem.
Conner nodded toward a large man in a leather vest a few feet away. “See that guy over there? He’s got a lipstick stain on his beer glass.” And Conner hadn’t seen him with anyone, much less anyone wearing lipstick. The glasses weren’t clean.
Lily shuddered. “Bottled beverages it is.”
The dance floor was packed. Pepper and Natalie each held a canned hard seltzer and grooved together on the periphery of the dance floor like middle school wallflowers, which they’d never be. Several cowboys checked them out. Conner hoped they’d be intimidated by his young charges. A group of leather-vested men and women who looked like they belonged to a motorcycle gang overflowed from a table near the stage. Patrons on the dance floor shifted to give them some room.
Conner kept one eye on Pepper and Natalie, and one on Lily, wishing he could just concentrate on the woman sitting across from him. Their time together was coming to a close. Irrationally, he didn’t want it to end. Tomorrow they’d be in Falcon Creek.
The music changed to a quieter slow song, making conversation more intimate and less of a shouting match.
Lily’s gaze collided with Conner’s and then fell away. “Pepper is such a sweetheart. I’m going to tell her the truth in the morning, regardless of what Big E wants.”
“You can tell her in forty-five minutes when we’re back in the motor home.”
Lily frowned. “Admitting I lied needs the clear light of day.”
“You’re wrong. The sooner the truth comes out, the better.” Not that Conner wanted Lily to know the truth about that double bonus he’d been promised. He got to his feet, stepped off the platform and held his hand out to Lily. “Come on. Slow dances were made for confessions, and confessions are good for the soul.” Or at least, the souls of those who weren’t in desperate need of cash. “You can practice what you’re going to say on me.”
Lily swiveled in her seat, set her feet on the platform, but her hand hesitated above his. “I shouldn’t be dancing. Or having fun. I just left a man at the altar.”
“Technically, he never stood on the altar.” Conner took Lily’s small hand. When they were together, it was easy to forget all the reasons they shouldn’t be. “Dance with me, Lily.”
She didn’t move, not back into the booth and not forward into his arms.
Conner drew her hand toward his chest and the ball of emotions spinning there, trying to break free. “Sometimes you have to go with your gut, even if others might raise their eyebrows. Even if what you choose to do goes against the norm.” Or your boss’s wishes. “Sometimes you have to honor your feelings because they don’t fit into a polite box. But following those feelings makes you feel more like yourself.”
His hold on her hand tightened, because being with Lily made Conner feel all kinds of emotions he’d kept locked away since his accident—guilt, tenderness, duty, joy. “Let’s forget about social norms and what people might say. Let’s dance, Lily. Just you and me.” Because they’d be in Falcon Creek tomorrow and go their separate ways. He’d have to pretend he didn’t want any excuse to talk to her, or to steady her when life threw her a curveball. He’d have to pack away his curiosity regarding what she wasn’t wearing in a mud bath and how it would feel to kiss her, s
tuffing his feelings back inside his chest, where they belonged, because feelings got in the way of responsibilities. Always.
Blue eyes luminous, Lily got to her feet. “Is it wrong that you understand me so well?”
“No.” Not until real life intruded. Conner led her to the dance floor, silently cursing the fact that the slow song was half-over. And then he was facing Lily and drawing her into his arms.
She came to him with tender certainty, as if she, too, knew this was a moment where time stood still and lines that shouldn’t be crossed could be breached.
Bodies jostled them closer and toward the darkest corner of the dance floor, where shadows beckoned lovers. A stroke of a hand down a slender back. A gentle brush of cheek to cheek. A kiss that lingered. None of it would be seen if he crossed that blurred line in the shadows. Did he dare seize the moment and risk a kiss that could lead nowhere but to sleepless nights and endless what-might-have-beens? Fate had never been kind to him before.
He kissed her anyway.
Big E wouldn’t be happy. This wasn’t the old man’s idea of delivering his granddaughter safely to the Blackwell Ranch while giving her time and space to air her concerns. He’d point out that Conner hadn’t been thinking.
Her father wouldn’t be happy. He’d claim there was a buffer period after a breakup, a time when hearts shouldn’t find love anew. He’d point out that Lily hadn’t been thinking.
There was no more thinking, though, because Lily was kissing him back.
There was just a slow country song and a couple deepening a kiss in the shadows.
His fingers tangled in her long, silky braid, loosening the loops. Lily’s lips were soft, as soft as her skin. She smelled of the mineral massage lotion at the spa. And her kiss... It was like he imagined skydiving was. He was pumped from adrenaline, breathless from the rush, heart pounding with hope that this moment would go on forever.
But just as quickly as it had begun, the kiss ended.
Reality intruded. Someone jolted them apart.
Lily’s eyes widened. Her lips trembled. “Oh... I...I’m sorry. I...I thought I could do this.” She bolted.
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