A few minutes later, there was a knock on the stall door. “Cora? Can I come in?” Valerie asked.
I took a deep breath and dried my eyes. With shaky hands, I unlatched the lock and cracked open the door. Val leaned in to hug me. “I’d ask how you’re holdin’ up, but I guess that’s a dumb question.”
I heaved a sigh. “I can’t believe him. I’m not over it yet? How could he even say that? It happened yesterday! He’s such a jerk.”
“Jerk’s an understatement. He’s the biggest creep in this school, and probably in the world,” Val blurted in agreement.
I smiled a little. I could always count on her to say just what I needed to hear.
“Was that a smile?” she teased. “You ready to take on the cafeteria now?”
“I guess. Just let me touch up my face. I can’t even imagine what I look like right now.”
“Well, you look fine, but sure, make yourself even more beautiful.”
“I’ll just be a minute. Wait for me?”
“Okay.”
I squeezed past her and went to stand in front of the full-length mirror on the back wall of the restroom. I was right about my appearance. Mascara ran down my cheeks and white spots marked where tears had washed away my foundation. Sighing, I pulled a makeup bag out of my purse and contemplated washing my face and starting over, but there were only twenty minutes left of lunch and I was starving. A small touch up would have to do.
Once I’d concealed any signs of a breakdown, Valerie and I headed toward the salad line. Jeff glanced up at me as we passed his newly claimed spot. I met his eyes for a split second, debating. I had a choice: I could be weak and look away, embarrassed, or I could be strong.
I decided weak wouldn’t do, so I shot him my most devastatingly fake smile.
Valerie let out a short laugh. “Ya know, I’m really proud of you,” she remarked.
“Ha. Why?” I asked, rolling my eyes. “I totally lost it earlier and made a complete idiot out of myself.”
She stopped walking and turned to face me, wide-eyed. “What? No way! You stood up for yourself, Cora. That took guts. And you got Jeff to give us the table! Trust me, nobody thinks you’re an idiot. I’ve already heard people talkin’ about how stupid he was to mess around on you with Lacy. Everybody thinks he’s the idiot.”
“Really? When’d you hear that? Who said it?”
“I overheard some guys at the table next to us. Right after you went to the bathroom.”
That made me nervous. It was one thing for people to think I was crazy for making such a scene—that I could deal with. But I did not want people to pity me.
I sighed for the hundredth time that day. There was nothing I could do about it; the damage was done. I’d just have to figure out some way to get past this. Some way to keep people from pitying me any more than they already did.
Valerie broke through my thoughts as we filled our plates with not-so-fresh salad. “You okay?”
“Huh? Oh, yeah. I’m fine.” I focused on the food in front of us and tried to relax my face.
“Are you sure? You look kinda strained.” She frowned.
“Really, Val, I’m fine. I was just thinkin’.”
“Wanna talk about it?” she offered.
“Actually, not right now. Sorry, I don’t mean to sound rude or anything. I just can’t stand to even think about all this anymore. Can we talk about somethin’ else?”
“Sure.” Silence enveloped us for a minute while we both tried to think of something else—anything else—to discuss that didn’t involve Jeff. Prom and homecoming were out of the question as conversation topics, as was cheerleading since he was the star football player and Lacy was on the squad with us. I cringed at that thought.
How was I supposed to move on from this? Everything about my “normal” life involved one or both of them. Everywhere I looked, they were there. How could I act peppy at the games while watching him score touchdowns? Especially when Lacy would be standing right behind me, cheering him on?
Landon had to say my name twice before I heard him. I’d been so wrapped up in my thoughts that I didn’t even notice we’d made it back to the table. Valerie was already sitting down, but I just stood frozen in front of my seat. Thoughts—worries—ambushed me. All the things I had yet to realize came crashing down on me at once.
“You all right? Need me to take your tray?” Landon’s voice was filled with concern. He glanced at my food, then back at me, obviously confused.
“Oh…no. Sorry. I was just…in a daze. What were you sayin’?” I put my tray on the table and plopped down on the round bench seat.
“I was just askin’ what you’re doin’ Friday night. I’m havin’ a pool party. Ya know, one last shindig before my parents close the pool for the season. Thought you might wanna get out and have some fun. Whatchya think?”
“Um, well…Friday I was gonna—But I guess that won’t happen now…” I won’t be going to that concert with Jeff. Not now, not ever. I shook my head in an attempt to clear all thoughts of Jeff. “Sure. ‘Course I’ll come, Landon. Thanks for the invite.”
He grinned. “Anytime.”
Chapter Four
The next few days passed slowly, painfully. By Friday, I could hardly stand it—the charade of friendly talk, fake smiles, pretending nothing was wrong when, in reality, the world as I knew it was over. Thankfully, Lacy had skipped the remaining cheerleading practices that week, for whatever reason. I couldn’t imagine her being ashamed of anything, so it took me by surprise when she didn’t show. I secretly hoped she had quit the squad.
I’d completely forgotten about the pool party at Landon’s until school was over Friday. Valerie and I were walking to our cars when Landon caught up with us. “Hey! Y’all are still comin’ tonight, right?” he asked.
“Tonight?” I blinked in confusion. Quickly searching my brain, I tried to remember. “Oh, yeah, of course. Wouldn’t miss it.” I smiled, attempting to hide the misery already building in my stomach. I was definitely not looking forward to more acting, more fake fun. This would be especially hard because I wouldn’t be able to hide behind a lecture or busy work like I could at school. I’d be forced to interact with people, to “have fun.”
“Cool. Wouldn’t be the same without ya.” he answered, grinning from ear to ear. I couldn’t help but return the gesture. I gave him a genuine smile, one of the very few I’d managed since the incident with Jeff.
“We’ll see ya there, Landon,” I said.
He leaned down and quickly kissed my cheek, causing me to take a surprised step back. He laughed. “See ya, Cor. Later, Val.” Then he jogged to his jeep and hopped in. I caught a glimpse of his face as he drove out of the parking lot. He was still smiling.
“Wow, he’s real excited about his party tonight,” I commented.
Valerie laughed. “Sure, now he is.”
“Don’t start that again, Val!”
“Okay, okay. I won’t say another word. We’ll just see…” she trailed off mischievously.
I narrowed my eyes at her. “Do you know somethin’ I don’t?”
“Nope. Just curious to see how things turn out tonight. Ya know, people always couple up at these parties.”
“Well, not me. I haven’t ‘coupled up’ with anybody besides Jeff in two years.” I grimaced. “I’m so not ready to jump back on that bandwagon.”
I was grateful when the conversation finally took a different turn as we talked about what to wear that night. Swimsuits and cover-ups, or real clothes and then change into swimsuits? We decided on the second option before going our separate ways.
“Okay, so I’ll pick you up at five?” Val asked.
“Yeah, sounds good. See ya then.”
As I got ready in my bedroom that afternoon, I couldn’t stop thinking about Landon. Butterflies did summersaults in my stomach as I considered what Valerie had said. Was Landon expecting something to happen between us at this party? I shook my head. There was no way he would even think
that. He was too much of a gentleman to move in on me so quickly after I ended things with Jeff. Besides, no matter what Valerie believed, I knew Landon only thought of me as a friend. He’d said so himself.
Convinced Valerie was reading way too much into Landon’s actions, I checked my reflection one last time. The bright pink sundress I’d picked out for the occasion emphasized my tanned skin, and I’d spent an hour hot-rolling my hair and perfecting my makeup. I needed to look as polished as possible at this party. I needed to prove to everybody that I was fine—that I was more than fine—and a good appearance was the start.
“Cora, honey, Valerie’s here!” Mama called from the living room.
“Comin’, Mama!” I grabbed my bag and skipped down the steps.
“Hey, Val! Ready to go?”
“Ready when you are. Wow, you look great! I feel like a bum.” She laughed as her eyes drifted from my dress to her cut-off shorts.
“No way. You look awesome!” I replied truthfully. Her long, shapely legs looked amazing in the shorts, and the light blue tank top she wore worked perfectly with her blonde hair and sea-blue eyes.
“You both look beautiful,” Mama interjected. “Now be careful tonight. What time will you be home, Cora?”
“Um, probably about eleven.” I shrugged.
“That’s fine. Just no later than twelve, okay?”
“Sure, Mama,” I leaned in to kiss her cheek. “See ya later.”
“Have fun, girls!” We were already out the door before she finished the sentence.
“Kayla called and asked for a ride. Troy’s got a stomach bug or somethin’. Is it cool if we stop by her place?” Valerie asked as we settled into the car.
“Yeah, definitely. The more, the merrier. Especially if it means more moral support.” I cringed at the thought of walking into a house full of whispers and pitying eyes.
“Don’t worry, Cora. It’ll be fine. I’ll stick by you the whole night if you want. I won’t even get punch without your permission.”
I chuckled. “Thanks, Val. You’re the best.”
“I know.” She shot me a sideways glance, a mischievous look in her eyes. “Of course, you may not want me to stick around…you know, with Landon bein’ there and stuff.” She winked.
“Did you really just wink at me?” I let out an exasperated breath. “Listen, not a word about that mess tonight, okay? Seriously. I don’t want Landon to overhear your crazy talk and think I like him or somethin’. I really don’t need any more drama right now.”
“Okay, okay. Not a word,” The grin on her face contradicted her promise.
“I mean it, Val!”
“All right, I swear.” She crossed her heart in a gesture meant to show sincerity.
A quick ten minutes later, we picked up Kayla and then headed to Landon’s. It was definitely easier making an entrance with two friends than it would have been walking in alone. It didn’t hurt that we were immediately approached by Landon.
“Hey, y’all! Thanks for comin’.” He grinned his crooked smile and gave each of us a hug. “Food’s that way,” he said, pointing toward the kitchen. “But nobody’s in the pool yet. Y’all wanna get the fun started?”
“Actually, I’m pretty hungry. Mind if we eat first?” In all honesty, I wasn’t ready to change into my swimsuit just yet. I needed to make at least one round through the crowd or all the time I’d spent getting dolled up would be wasted.
“Sure, that’s cool. Right this way, ladies.” He led us into the kitchen, where we each filled a plate with barbeque sandwiches and potato salad.
“This looks great,” I remarked.
“Thanks. My mom actually did all of it this afternoon before she and my dad left for their date.”
“They have a date?” Kayla asked. “That’s so sweet!”
“Yeah. Or gross.” He shuddered to emphasize his point, and we all laughed. “Guess I’ll let you gorgeous women eat in peace. Think I heard somebody jump in the pool. Hurry up or you’ll miss all the fun!” Landon’s voice trailed off as he jogged through the living room and opened the sliding door that led out to the pool deck.
Kayla turned toward me, her eyebrows drawn. “He’s such a cutie, and so sweet. What happened between y’all? You’re perfect for each other! Why didn’t it last?”
I shrugged. “I don’t really know. Guess we just figured out we’re better as friends. And then…well, then Jeff asked me out.”
Kayla’s freckled face crumpled. “Oh, no. I’m so sorry, Cora! I know Jeff’s the last person you wanna talk about tonight.”
“It’s fine, Kay,” I said. “He is the last person I wanna talk about, but it’s okay. I know you didn’t mean to bring it up. Don’t worry about it.”
We finished our food and decided to mingle, strolling through the kitchen and into the living room. We talked and laughed with some girls from the cheerleading squad, then moved on to chat with Landon’s baseball buddies.
Kayla made polite conversation with everyone, but it was obvious she wasn’t as comfortable with the crowd as Valerie and me. A short time later, though, some of Kayla’s friends from the Beta Club arrived, and she seemed to loosen up while we talked to them.
The three of us socialized a while longer, sticking together like glue and enjoying the loud music that pounded in our ears and thudded under our feet. After about an hour, the house became empty.
“Guess everybody’s outside now,” Kayla commented.
“Yeah, so what do y’all think? Should we get in our swimsuits and join the party?” Valerie nearly bounced in excitement. She was like a puppy waiting for a treat.
I laughed. “Sure. Guess I’ve made good enough use out of this dress for one night.” Surprisingly, I’d been having a good time. Jeff had been pushed to the back of my mind and I was able to focus on my friends. I felt happier and more relaxed than I had all week, possibly because I saw only friendly faces, or maybe because I was comfortable—safe, even—at Landon’s house.
We made our way to Landon’s bedroom at the back of the house to change our clothes. I retrieved three beach towels from the linen closet, and we headed toward the sounds of splashing.
As we approached the living room exit leading out to the deck, I noticed that Landon’s parents had renovated the entire outside area since I’d last seen it. Past the French doors was a large hourglass-shaped in-ground pool, encircled by several lounge chairs of varying hues of blue and green. Tiki torches had been placed strategically at each corner of the deck, and the deck’s wooden rails were strung with colorful lights all the way around.
As we stepped outside, I watched Landon throw a girl into the pool. A twinge pierced my stomach. Strange, I thought. Was I jealous of that?
With a slight shake of my head, I quickly dismissed the feeling. Most likely, I just felt possessive of Landon because we were becoming close friends again. I was getting used to being the center of his attention at school, which I selfishly enjoyed now that I was no longer the center of Jeff’s.
Kayla nudged me. “Cora, are you okay? I’m sure they’re just friends,” she said, turning her head full of short, curly brown hair toward the pool.
“Who?”
“You know who,” she said. “You don’t look too happy about the situation goin’ on in the pool right now.” As Kayla spoke, Landon and the girl whose name I didn’t know—she must not have been a senior—splashed and flirted in front of us.
Val chimed in after she noticed my expression. “Seriously, you’re shootin’ darts at her through your eyes.”
Oh, no, I thought. Am I really that obvious?
“Come on, y’all. How many times do I have to say it? Landon and I are just friends. We’ve been friends almost our whole lives. I was just caught off guard. Didn’t know he was seein’ anybody.”
Valerie grinned. “He’s not.”
I glanced at Kayla, then Val. “What’re you talkin’ about? How do you know?” My gaze drifted back to the action in the pool. “They look pretty friend
ly to me.”
“They really do,” Kayla added. “How do you know they’re not together?”
Val bit her bottom lip. “Um…because I…um, well, I know her,” she stammered.
Valerie was acting really strange, but I didn’t get a chance to quiz her before Landon noticed us and climbed out of the pool.
“Hey! Y’all gettin’ in?” he asked.
“Of course!” Val tossed her towel on a lounge chair nearby and jumped into the water. Watching her with curious eyes, I had a strong feeling she knew something I didn’t. I turned to Kayla, who was looking at me, questioning.
“You go ahead,” I commented. “I’ll get in after a while.”
“All right,” she answered, inching into the pool one ladder rung at a time.
Landon and I were the only ones left on the deck. “You looked great tonight, by the way,” he remarked. “Before, I mean. In that dress.” His face turned red. “Not that you don’t look good now, too. I just…well, you know.”
I blushed, glancing down at my now bikini-clad body. “Thanks.”
“So, don’t wanna get wet?” he asked, nudging my arm.
“Um, not yet. I kinda just wanna relax for a minute.”
“Cool. Let’s sit, then.” He plopped down sideways on the closest lounge chair and patted the spot next to him. I flung my towel where Val and Kayla had put theirs and went to sit next to Landon.
“Havin’ a good time?” He draped his arm over my shoulder, waiting for an answer.
“Yeah, actually I am.” I smiled and poked him. “Thanks to you.”
He cocked his head to the side. “What’d I do?”
“Well, you invited me, first of all. Then you made sure I felt welcome and comfortable as soon as I got here. It’s been really great to just let go and have fun. Forget about everything that’s happened. And you made it all possible.”
He grinned and ruffled my hair. “No problem. What’re friends for, right?”
Every word Valerie had said about Landon still having feelings for me shot straight out the window at that moment. “Right,” I replied, debating for a second whether or not I should ask my next question. Curiosity got the best of me. “By the way, who’s the girl you’re with? I’m sure she’s wonderin’ why you’re sittin’ up here with me.” I forced a laugh.
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