“Well, honey, you’ve spent an awful lot of time with him these past few months. And boys don’t always get the hint. You have to be pretty straightforward with them,” she replied.
I groaned. “I guess you’re right. I should go talk to him. Is this enough carrots?”
She glanced at the few carrots I’d chopped and chuckled. “It’s a start. But you go ahead and I’ll finish up in here.”
“Thanks, Mama.” I wiped my hands on a dishtowel, tossed it onto the counter, and headed out the front door since my mother now had the back door blocked by supplies for the party. I didn’t even make it to the side of the house before I heard my name.
“Cora!” Rex called.
Oh, no. I turned to face him as he walked toward me. “Hey, Rex! Thanks for comin’!” I said, smiling to hide my anxiety. Surprisingly, my heart didn’t race when he wrapped his arms around my waist and embraced me. Of course I noticed how handsome he looked in his khaki shorts and light blue button-up shirt—sleeves rolled up to his elbows, top two buttons undone—and how rock-hard his body felt against mine. But my thoughts were too focused on the dreaded conversation with Landon to really appreciate these things.
“Sorry I’m a little early.” He smiled. “I noticed your dad outside, and I just couldn’t wait to see you again.”
I blushed and felt a small flutter in my heart at his words—found those butterflies. “I couldn’t wait to see you, either.” My blush deepened when I realized he still had his arms around the lowest part of my waist. Remembering Landon, I slowly and regretfully shrugged out of Rex’s hold.
“Come on out to the deck. I want you to meet a couple of people.”
“Sure thing,” he answered.
When I turned around, I spotted Landon at the front doorway. I met his gaze and stopped. We both stood frozen, his face rigid with anger.
Chapter Nine
After what felt like an eternity, I broke our stare and glanced at Rex, who was curiously observing the interaction. “Um, let’s go this way. You can meet Landon,” I mumbled, my stomach in nervous knots.
As we approached, Landon’s face relaxed a bit. “Hey, Cora, who’s your friend?” he asked. Despite his obvious efforts, the words came out through clenched teeth.
“Landon, this is Rex. He just moved in across the street. Rex, this is my friend Landon.”
“Pleasure to meet you,” Rex said, extending his hand.
Landon took the outstretched hand and shook with a little too much force. “Same here.”
“So how do you two know each other?” Rex asked.
“Um, well. We kinda…grew up together, and…ya know…” I trailed off, struggling to answer the question.
“Dated,” Landon spat, glaring at Rex. “We dated. And we’re still close.” The jealousy pouring out of him hit me with a million pounds of force. He was trying to claim his territory, and it bugged me. He broke up with me all that time ago. Sure, we were great friends, but what right did that give him to intimidate Rex?
I shot him a warning look. “Yeah, we’re very close friends,” I said, emphasizing the last word.
“Right,” Landon muttered. “Anyway, I was trying to find you, Cora. Your dad was wonderin’ if you have any other guests comin’. He needs to know how many burgers we should make.”
“Val, Kayla, and Troy. Mike may or may not show up. Make an extra one for him just in case,” I said coldly.
“Fine. I’ll let Jack know.” Without another word or so much as a glance at Rex, Landon was gone. I fumed internally at the name drop.
“I’m so sorry, Rex. I have no idea what that was all about. He’s usually a really nice guy.”
Rex chuckled softly. “I’d be pretty bitter, too, if I’d let you get away.”
I frowned, considering the possibility that Landon may not be angry with me, but that he might actually be angry with himself for letting me “get away,” as Rex put it. All harsh feelings toward him vanished as I considered the possible weight of his regret.
“Maybe that’s what it is. Anyway, let’s go out back,” I said.
“Sure.” Rex casually draped his arm around my shoulder, but instead of feeling giddy, I was annoyed. Was he trying to claim his territory now? This was getting to be way too much. I silently wished for Kayla and Val to arrive soon.
When they did finally show up half an hour later, with Mike and Troy in tow, I introduced them all to Rex and led them to the food.
“Um, hey, girls…you can come put your purses in my bedroom,” I said, trying to get them away from the guys so I could vent about my situation.
Val seemed to notice the anxiety in my expression, so she took mine and Kayla’s arms. “All right, let’s go.”
“Be right back,” Kayla called to Troy over her shoulder.
When we were safely in my room with the door closed, I flung myself down on the bed and heaved a sigh that sounded more like a groan.
“What’s wrong?” Val implored.
Kayla sat down beside me. “Seriously. You look like you’re about to explode.”
I sat up. “I am! So, long story short—” I paused, searching my brain for a starting point to this madness.
Val raised her eyebrows expectantly, waiting for the story. “Well…?”
“Okay, you both know about this thing with Rex. You both also know that Landon’s one of my best friends and has been for a really long time. Well…” I replayed the previous hour for them, not leaving anything out. Once every detail had been divulged, I huffed and lay all the way back on the bed again.
“Wow,” Kayla breathed.
Val grinned. “I told you! I knew it all along. Landon has the hots for you!”
“This is serious, Val,” I shrieked. “What am I gonna do?”
“Sorry,” she mumbled. “Well, how do you feel about him? It’s obvious how he feels. I mean, you can’t deny it now, Cora. He wouldn’t be so jealous if he didn’t love you.”
I bolted upright. “Love?” I blinked. “What are you talkin’ about? Nobody said a thing about love!”
“Okay, calm down,” Val said. “Geez, I wasn’t tryin’ to freak you out. I just know Landon’s in love with you. He always has been and probably always will be.”
“I don’t think so, Val. He’s just jealous because we’ve been spendin’ so much time together and now he has competition. Typical guy thing. I’m sure it has more to do with that than his actual feelings.”
Kayla piped in then. “No, Val’s right. He’s crazy about you. Everybody can see it…except you.”
I thought back to Landon’s pool party and the kiss we’d shared. It had been months and I still hadn’t told my friends. I debated about whether or not to spill the beans. There would be no arguing with them once they knew about that kiss.
I took a deep breath, twisting a loose string on my quilt and avoiding their eyes. “Okay, I have to tell y’all somethin’. I’ve been keepin’ this to myself for a really long time because I didn’t wanna face it.”
Kayla and Valerie glanced at each other and then stared expectantly at me. “What is it, Cora?” Kayla asked.
“Do y’all remember that pool party at Landon’s house, back in September?”
“When Lacy the witch showed up? Yeah, I remember,” Val muttered.
“What about it?” Kayla asked.
I quickly rushed through the whole story and then held my breath for their reactions.
Kayla’s eyes grew wide. “Seriously? You two kissed? I can’t believe you didn’t tell us!”
I stood and began pacing. “I didn’t tell anybody. I wanted to sort it out for myself first. And it was only that one time, so I figured it was better to just…not bring it up. We decided to forget it ever happened and not let it ruin our friendship.”
“No, Cora, you decided to forget it ever happened. Landon never forgot.”
“What? How do you know?” I questioned, eyeing Val suspiciously.
She touched my arm. “You might wanna sit down fo
r this.”
“What?”
“A couple of days ago, Landon and I were talkin’ after fourth period and I asked him how he felt about you.” She paused to study my reaction. “I’m sorry. I hope you don’t think I overstepped my boundaries or somethin’. But I just had to know. Y’all’ve been spendin’ so much time together, and I didn’t want you to miss out on somethin’ that could be great. So I just came right out and asked him.”
I wandered over to the chair in front of my vanity and sank down into it. “So…what—”
“He told me about the kiss,” Val gushed. “And then he told me he’s crazy in love with you. And has been forever.”
“What?” A flood of thoughts jumbled my mind, my heart skipping. I couldn’t even think straight. I didn’t know if I should be happy or angry. I just felt flustered. “Why didn’t you tell me?” I demanded.
“I’m so sorry, Cor! He swore me to secrecy. He was plannin’ on tellin’ you himself…today.”
My breath came out in a rush. “Today?” I whispered.
“Yeah…”
Kayla, who’d been listening quietly to Val’s revelation, suddenly shrieked with happiness. “Oh, my gosh! This is so great! I always knew you and Landon would get back together. He’s perfect for you, and you two make such a cute couple, and now y’all can go to prom together! You’ll have the perfect end to senior year, and then you’ll go off to college together and then eventually get ma—”
I cut Kayla short, shaking my head. “Stop! Don’t you dare finish that sentence! Nobody’s gettin’ back together.”
She bit her lip apologetically. “Maybe I got a little carried away.”
“Humph. A little?” I crossed my arms and stared at my two friends. “Will y’all please listen to me? Landon’s my friend. Nothin’ more. I’ll have to talk to him, but we won’t be gettin’ back together. We’ve been down that road and it obviously didn’t work. I’d rather have his friendship than risk losin’ it just so we can have an excuse to make out. I’m sure he’ll see my point of view. So, please, just drop it.”
“You won’t even consider this? Sleep on it?” Val pushed.
“No.”
Kayla’s shoulders slumped. “Well, in that case, you’d better get him alone so you can reject him in private…before he embarrasses himself any more today.”
Val glanced at Kayla and let out a deep, exaggerated breath. “Should we go get him for you? It’s probably better to have that conversation up here, where you won’t be interrupted.”
“Yeah, guess I might as well get it over with,” I answered, toying with a necklace strewn across my vanity. Those knots were in my stomach again. The girls left, and I stared at myself in the mirror, wondering how I’d let things get so messed up.
Moments later, a knock sounded on my bedroom door. Landon cracked open the door, peeking his head in. “Cora?”
I glanced up at him and bit my lip. “Hey, Landon.”
“The girls said you wanted to talk to me,” he said quietly. Then his words were coming out in a rush. “Look, I’m real sorry about the way I acted out there. You know, with that Rex kid. I didn’t mean to be such a jerk. It’s just that when I saw him hug you…well, I felt like the breath had been knocked outa me. I’ve been meanin’ to tell you somethin’ for a while now, and I don’t wanna put it off anymore. It’s important, and it’s all I think about these days—”
“Landon, please don’t say anything else.” I closed my eyes, sucked in a deep breath for courage, and opened them to stare at his sweet face. I exhaled slowly and began letting him down as gently as I could. “Listen, I know how you feel about me,” I began. “Val told me what you said to her. I’m real flattered, Landon, but I don’t think it’s actually love, ya know? I mean, we’ve been spendin’ a lot of time together and we’ve gotten to be pretty close again. The way we used to be, before we were a couple. I think, maybe, what you feel is more of a…I don’t know…territorial thing. It’s not really love, Landon.”
He stared at me, incredulous—perhaps too shocked to move. It felt like forever before he finally spoke. “I…can’t…believe you,” he said slowly. He shook his head, huffing. “You’re so stubborn, you know that? You’re the most stubborn girl I ever met. And how do you know what’s goin’ on in my head? Or my heart? What makes you so sure about how I feel?”
I cringed, hoping he wouldn’t let his temper get the best of him. The last thing I wanted to do was make him mad. “Please don’t get upset, Landon. I’m not tryin’ to hurt you or insult you. I just don’t want this to go on any longer…I’m afraid we’ll lose what we have. And I don’t want that. It’s too special.”
“I really wish you’d quit with that ‘we’ll lose what we have’ stuff. It’s a bad excuse. Why don’t you just come right out and say it? You’re not attracted to me.”
I winced. How could he think I wasn’t attracted to him after all we’d been through? “You couldn’t be more wrong!” I snapped. “If I wasn’t attracted to you, why would I have ever dated you? And why would I have let you kiss me at your pool party? I don’t make it a habit to go around kissin’ random guys, Landon.”
His anger vanished instantly, and he grinned. “So you are attracted to me. Then what’s the problem?” he asked nonchalantly.
I groaned. “You’re not listenin’ to me!”
“Yes, I am,” he replied. “But all I’m hearin’ are excuses, not reasons. Give me one good reason we shouldn’t be together. And don’t say because it’d ruin our friendship.”
“Well, I…”
“You?”
I jumped out of the chair I’d been sitting in and threw my hands up in the air. “I don’t know! Okay? Is that what you wanted to hear?”
He took a step toward me. “If that’s the truth, then, yeah, it’s exactly what I wanna hear.”
“I don’t know what the truth is. I just don’t think it’s a good idea for us to get back together. That’s it. End of discussion.”
He recoiled as if I’d slapped him across the face. “What are you so scared of?”
I rolled my eyes and took a few steps away from him. “I’m not scared of anything, Landon. I just don’t wanna talk about this anymore. Besides, Rex is out there waitin’ for me.”
“Oh, I see how it is. You’ve got a new guy showin’ you attention now, so you won’t even consider what I’m askin’.”
“Landon, come on. Don’t—”
“No,” he interrupted. “Look, Cora, this is how it’s gonna be. This thing—whatever we’ve been doin’—it’s gonna stop. From now on, it’s all or nothin’.”
My heart dropped to the floor. “What are you sayin’?”
“I’m sayin’ it’s him or me. We either do this all the way or not at all.”
I swallowed, holding back tears. “That’s pretty harsh, Landon.”
“No, what’s harsh is bein’ strung along for months, thinkin’ there’s hope when there’s really not. I gave you up to somebody else before, and I can’t go through that again. So tell me right now what it’s gonna be.”
My lips quivered, the lump in my throat throbbing with unshed tears. “I can’t…please don’t make me choose.”
He stared at me with a blank expression. “I guess that’s my answer,” he mumbled. Then he spun around and strode out of my bedroom—and my life.
Chapter Ten
The cool morning air whipped across my face as I jogged the remaining few feet back to my driveway. I slowed to a walk, taking in the sound of birds chirping and the scent of freshly cut grass. Although things weren’t completely right after the big fight with Landon—which was three weeks ago and we still hadn’t spoken—I was making an effort to live every day to the fullest. With only a month of high school left, I wanted to really appreciate every get-together with friends, every pep rally, every sleepover, and every date with Rex—especially prom.
The big night was exactly one week and one day away. Next Saturday I’d be spinning around the dance floo
r in a beautiful dress with Rex by my side.
Back inside the house, I stared at my prom dress while throwing on a pair of jeans and a tank top, while fixing my hair, while putting on makeup. Excitement bubbled up inside me every time I looked at that dress. It was a glittering bright-pink fabric, long and fitted with a halter neck and flowing out slightly at the bottom. The perfect dress for what I hoped would be the perfect night.
Prom was still on my mind when I pulled into my assigned parking space at school later that morning. I was contemplating whether to wear my hair up or down when a knock on my window startled me back to the present.
Val stood outside my car, glancing impatiently at her watch. “We’re gonna be late for homeroom! What in the world are you doin’ just sittin’ there?”
“Sorry, I was thinkin’ about prom and stuff,” I replied.
“Ugh, don’t remind me,” she grumbled. “If I don’t find a date soon—like today—I won’t even be goin’. And then I’ll have to return my dress!”
“You’re not gonna return your dress,” I assured her for the millionth time. “Somebody’ll ask you.” Personally, I couldn’t figure out why nobody had asked her yet. Valerie was a catch—gorgeous, funny, smart.
“Nope, afraid not.” She sighed. “I just have to face it: all the good guys are taken. It’s senior year. Most people are in relationships. I have no boyfriend, so…no prom date.”
It was true that Valerie wasn’t in a serious relationship, but she’d been on a lot of dates—guys were always asking her to go out with them. Unfortunately, most of those guys had gone on to find somebody they could call their girlfriend, however short-lived. Valerie simply wasn’t the exclusive-relationship type. She said having that kind of commitment in high school would only lead to disappointment. Which I now knew from first-hand experience.
We were silent as we walked through the parking lot, into the school, and down the hall toward class. Finally, I tried one more push. “Why don’t you just ask somebody? After all, it is the twenty-first century. Aren’t women allowed to make the first move these days?”
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