While she watched Matthew play, she realized he was good at everything. Everyone liked him, and she couldn’t find one flaw in him. Her mind drifted to Elijah. In a way, it was a blessing that he was living far away. It would be painful to see him married to someone else and living in the same community. In time, she might not even think about him at all.
She noticed someone walking over to her. It was Nathanial, Matthew’s cousin. It was odd that they were cousins and yet they were so different. He sat down next to her without being asked.
“Matthew tells me you’re going on a buggy ride with him tonight, Lily.”
“That’s correct.” She stared at him, knowing he was going to make some snide remark about his cousin.
“You shouldn’t lead him on, you know. He’ll only get hurt when you end up choosing me.”
Maybe he was joking, but Lily was in no mood for jokes or small talk. “That’s where you’re wrong because I’m not gonna choose you.”
He gave an exaggerated gasp and put his large hand over his heart. “You’re killing me.”
When he pulled a funny face, she couldn’t help but laugh.
“Stop it. I’m going on a buggy ride with Matthew and there’s nothing you can do about it.”
He shook his head. “I thought you were more sensible than that.”
“Where did you get the idea that I was ever sensible? Anyway, I gave you a chance once and that’s all you deserve.”
He laughed.
She ignored him and kept watching Matthew, although she could feel that Nathanial was still staring at her. He needed to be put firmly in his place. “Matthew’s quite handsome, don’t you think?”
“Jah, very.”
That wasn’t the response she was expecting. “You really think so?”
“Of course. It runs in the family genes.”
She shook her head. He always had a quick answer. “You would say that.”
“Only because it’s true.”
Taking her eyes off Matthew and his game for a moment, she stared at Nathanial. “Are you saying that you’re handsome?”
His mouth gaped open. “I would never say anything like that. You just said it.”
“Nee, I didn’t. Clean out your ears. I said Matthew was.”
“Same thing. You think my cousin’s handsome, then you must think that I am because I’m much better looking.”
“It seems as though you are trying to ruin your cousin’s buggy ride with me. Don’t you have any shame?”
“Nee.” He leaned closer. “And I never stop until I get what I want.”
“You’re dreadful.”
“Denke. I’ll take that as a compliment. Better to have some reaction from you than no reaction at all.”
Lily shook her head at him, but she couldn’t help smiling. It was never boring to be around Nathanial. And she hated to be bored.
“You should leave a message with your cousins for Matthew, that you’ve gone home with me, or rather, that I have taken you home. You could say you don’t feel well.”
“Ah, that would be a lie, though, because I feel fine.”
“You’re missing the point, Lily. We could get out of here right now and go somewhere exciting. I only came so I could see you. At least come and have a drink with me somewhere.”
She gave a laugh and for a split second his idea was appealing until Matthew approached them wiping his face with a towel.
“You weren’t watching me, Lily,” Matthew said.
“I was watching you most of the time until your cousin deliberately distracted me.”
Matthew threw his towel over Nathanial’s face. “The best thing you can do with Nathanial is to ignore him.”
Nathanial grabbed the towel and flicked it back at Matthew, who managed to duck out of the way.
Lily giggled at their clowning around.
Matthew took the towel back and sat down on the other side of Lily. “I apologize for my cousin if he’s been harassing you.”
“That’s not very nice, cuz.” ‘Cuz,’ short for cousin, was what they called each other.
Matthew laughed, leaned over and flicked the towel at Nathanial behind Lily’s back.
“Ow, that got me.”
“It was supposed to,” Matthew said, laughing. “I hope he’s not trying to stop you going out with me later tonight.”
“Jah, he was. He said I’d have more fun going with him.”
Matthew frowned at Nathanial.
Nathanial said, “I told Lily she should give a real man a chance.”
Matthew looked around about him. “Where is this real man that you speak of? I can’t see him anywhere.”
Nathanial stretched out his arms. “I’m right here.”
“I’m going on that buggy ride with Matthew.” Lily made the statement while looking straight ahead.
“Denke, Lily. You heard it straight from Lily’s lips, Nathanial. Sorry to disappoint you.”
Nathanial sighed. “You can’t blame a man for trying.” He stood up. “Well, I’ll leave the two of you by yourselves and see if I can’t squeeze into one of the teams.”
“You do that, cuz,” Matthew agreed.
When Nathanial walked away, Matthew leaned in close to Lily. “I’m sorry about that, Lily. He has trouble knowing when he’s overstepping the line. Feel free to tell him to leave you alone next time, or come and get me.”
“I didn’t want to be rude.”
“You wouldn’t be with people like Nathanial. That’s what they understand.”
“Are you going to play another game?”
“I might, but there are enough people here so I can sit down for a while.”
Lily looked back at the games. There were four nets set up. Three games were ongoing and Nathanial was now amongst the last group sorting themselves into two teams.
“You should have a game, Lily.” He nodded over toward where the teams were playing.
“I’m not very coordinated. It would be a disaster.”
Matthew chuckled. “It would be fun to watch.”
Lily pouted. “You’re supposed to be on my side.”
“I’ll always be on your side.” Matthew moved closer to her until their shoulders touched.
Lily looked over at the field again. “Look, Willow’s having a game.”
“That’s not a good idea because of her sore shoulder.”
“She says she’s better. Do you think I should stop her?”
“Nee, let her play and have some fun.”
Lily nodded. “Okay.”
“It’s not a serious game, so I don’t think she’ll get knocked down.”
“I hope not, otherwise I’ll be in trouble from Aunt Nerida. And she might never talk to Mamm again.”
“I don’t think there’s a chance of that happening.”
Lily didn’t say anything to him but he should’ve been aware that Nerida and her mother hadn’t been close for years. They would only speak to each other when they had to.
Lily and Matthew sat there the whole game and watched Willow. It was the same game that Nathanial was playing in but they were on different teams.
“She’s playing quite well for someone of her build and with a sore shoulder.”
“I didn’t know she could play that well.”
Chapter 19
The cousins had been taken back to Lily’s home and now Lily’s date with Matthew had begun.
She was nervous as the horse traveled back down their narrow dirt-packed driveway. She didn’t know why she was so nervous because she saw him every day. Was it a mistake agreeing to go out with him? If things went wrong, she’d still have to see him every day at the markets.
A part of her wanted him to turn around now and she’d explain that they could only ever be friends, but her mother’s words about giving him a chance rang in her ears. Perhaps after tonight, she might feel differently toward him.
“Do you know where we’re going?”
He looked over at her and laugh
ed. “No, not really. I just figured we’d see where the night took us.”
“It looks like the night’s taking us near the Glicks’ farm.”
“I thought I’d take you around some of the old winding roads out the back of their property. Unless you’d like to head into town where there are bright lights. We could go and have a cup of coffee somewhere.”
“No, let’s see how these roads look at night. I like driving at night.”
He looked over at her. “Do you?”
“Jah, I like the fresh cool air and … I don’t know. It’s kind of exciting.”
Matthew laughed at her. “You always look for the fun in things.”
“I used to, but now Daisy has gone things are different.”
“You’ve become sad, have you?”
She looked at Matthew’s smiling face and knew he wouldn’t understand what it was like having the person you’ve lived with every day for over twenty years suddenly being taken from you. “Things are different now.”
“I know. I know it must be hard for you to be without Daisy.”
“I don’t know that anyone can understand it without being a twin themselves. We’re identical twins, which means we’re nearly the same person. We’re two halves of a whole.” Lily just hoped that Daisy remembered that—wherever she was.
Keeping his eyes on the road, Matthew rubbed his chin. “Something tells me your mind is elsewhere tonight.”
“Nee, it’s not.”
He gave her a quick look. “Do you want to do this another night?”
She did, but what would her mother say if she got back to the house so early? “I’m okay.”
“Let’s do it another night when you feel like it. I honestly don’t think that tonight’s the right time.”
“Okay. We’ll do this another night. I guess I’m feeling out of sorts and in a strange mood. I’m sorry, Matthew.”
He slowed down, and then turned the buggy around. “Don’t worry about it. It’s best that we leave this for another time.”
“Denke, Matthew.” She sat in uncomfortable silence as the horse trotted back to her house.
When he stopped the buggy at her house, things were even more awkward.
“Here we are,” he said.
“Would you like to come in for a cup of hot chocolate? I know Mamm and Dat would like it if you did.”
He smiled at her. “And you?”
“Jah, of course I would like it. I didn’t mean that they were the only ones who would want you to come inside.”
He shook his head. “Nee, Lily. You go and have an early night. I’ll see you tomorrow.”
“Okay.” She jumped down from the buggy and headed to her house while he turned his buggy around. Once she got to the door, she waved to him as his horse walked down the driveway.
When Lily walked inside, she was pleased that her mother wasn’t waiting there to find out what had happened. All Lily wanted to do was get into bed. She had hoped that spending time with another man would take her mind off Elijah, but it hadn’t worked. If anything, it had brought home how much she and Elijah were suited. It had been a mistake to go on a buggy ride with Matthew and she hoped it hadn’t ruined their friendship.
* * *
Lily was shaken awake the next morning. She looked at her mother through half-opened eyes. “Why are you waking me so early?”
“It’s not early. It’s time to wake up. If you don’t wake up now, you’ll be late for work and you know how Mrs. Walker hates it when you’re late.”
She sat up in bed. “I’m awake.”
Her mother laughed. “Only just.”
“I don’t want to be late.”
“How did things go with Matthew last night?”
And there it was. The question that Lily knew she would have to answer sooner or later. “I won’t be going out with him again. Anyway, we see each other every day at work. We really had nothing to talk about.”
Her mother leaned over and kissed her forehead. “You’ll figure things out.”
“I hope so.” She didn’t talk about Elijah. Her mother wouldn’t understand.
As Lily got ready for work, she knew she could never marry someone unless she was in love with them—and just as much in love with them as she’d been in love with Elijah.
Besides, how would it be fair on the man she married if she wasn’t really in love with him? Everyone deserved to have someone who loved them. She shook her head in an effort to get rid of the images of Elijah that kept jumping into her mind.
Chapter 20
Lily arrived at work feeling awkward about seeing Matthew after their disastrous buggy ride the night before. At least she had explored the idea that they might make a good match. Her mother had to be grateful for that.
Throughout the day, Matthew was polite but he kept his distance. Neither of them mentioned the night before. Matthew had to know that things were never going to work out between them.
When she was getting into her buggy to go home that afternoon, she saw Nathanial jogging toward her.
“Wait up,” he called out, waving her down.
She got out of her buggy to see what he wanted.
“How did your buggy ride go with Matthew?”
“Didn’t your cousin tell you?”
“We don’t talk about everything.”
“That’s good to know.”
“If you haven’t made any long-term commitments to him, I would like you to come out with me,” Nathanial said.
“We already did that, remember?”
“That was some time ago. Come on, just give me another chance.”
“Why, have you changed?”
“I’m always changing and growing and becoming a better person.”
When she stopped and stared at him, she could see that he wasn’t joking. To make that comment he had to have known he needed changing. She seriously considered another date with him. Things with Matthew hadn’t worked out so what better things did she have to do with Elijah gone?
“Maybe I will, but it won’t be any time soon.”
“What about this Saturday afternoon? I’m working in the morning but I could swing past your place after that and then we could go somewhere.”
Lily shook her head. “I don’t know.”
“What’s to stop you?”
She bit her lip. “Nothing, I guess.”
“It’s done then.” He clapped his hands, causing her to jump with fright. “I’ll collect you after work on Saturday. I can’t give you an exact time. It’ll be sometime between twelve and one.” He turned around to walk away.
“I haven’t said that I will go with you,” she called after him.
“I won’t take no for an answer. And if I have to come in and speak to your parents and tell them how I’ve changed, I will.”
“I don’t think that will be necessary.” Lily remembered that her parents were taking the cousins back to Nerida’s on Saturday.
“I’ll see you then.”
* * *
Somehow, Nathanial always managed to make Lily laugh. She liked his bright and breezy carefree manner, whereas Matthew was quieter and although he was funny sometimes, he was generally serious-minded. But was Nathanial a man she could trust? He’d always treated her respectfully and politely and that was why she’d begun to doubt what Daisy had said about him.
If Matthew had deserved a chance, it seemed only fair to give Nathanial one. After all, she’d liked him before Elijah had come along. She only hoped Matthew wouldn’t be upset that she had agreed to go out with Nathanial.
* * *
The time eventually came when Nerida had recovered enough to have her daughters at home.
“Are you sure you don’t want to come with us when I take the girls back home, Lily?” Nancy asked.
“Nee, you go. I’ll stay home and do a few things. I might go out a bit later on myself.”
“Okay. We’ll be gone for a few hours.”
Nancy wondered why her daught
er seemed so keen to stay home alone. Perhaps she was upset and would feel better when she’d had time to think things through.
Nancy got the two cousins organized with a bag of clothes and they all piled into the buggy that Hezekiah had just readied and had waiting for them by the front door.
“Are you going to miss us, Aunt Nancy?” Willow asked.
“Of course we are going to miss you. You’ve both been so good. You can come back and stay at any time.”
“Will you tell Mamm we’ve been really good?” Willow asked.
Hezekiah chuckled. “We’ll be certain to do that, but I don’t think your mother would be concerned that you weren’t on your best behavior.”
“We’re not always good at home,” Willow said.
“I think you’re good enough,” Nancy said, thinking of how dreadful the twins could be sometimes.
Nerida’s place was close, only fifteen minutes by buggy.
John opened the door when Nancy knocked at the front door of Nerida’s house. Nancy was impressed that the two girls, Willow and Violet, stayed politely behind her rather than rushing past her like her daughters would’ve.
“Come in,” John said with a big smile. He opened his arms to his daughters as Nancy walked past him. He gave his daughters a big hug. Once they were through the door, Hezekiah walked inside.
Nancy then followed John and the girls into the living room. Nerida was on the couch with her leg elevated.
“Can you get around yet, Nerida?”
She pointed to a cane on the other side of the room. “I’ve got a stick to help me walk, but it’s still quite painful.”
“I can keep the girls for longer if you want me to.”
“Nee, they should be fine. They can help with things in the house.”
“Now I can go back to work,” John said with a laugh.
“He’s been a good nurse.”
“I did my best. I don’t know that I’m cut out for it.”
“We could’ve looked after you, Mamm,” Violet said.
“Well, you can look after me now. I didn’t want to burden either of you with all my pain.”
John laughed. “But it was all right to burden me with that?”
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