“Don't look at her,” Noor growled. “Answer me, how?” Noor repeated firmly, anger tipping over. He moved to the front of the bed, putting himself between Ember and Jedoriah.
As if breaking from a trance, Jedoriah blinked several times and shook his head. He looked into Noor's dark brown eyes.
“You know how,” Jedoriah said. “You saw me kill him.”
Noor pulled his knife in a blink and Ember’s tears ran cold. She stood up from the bed, and Noor angled to stay in front of her.
“I’m not going to hurt you,” Jedoriah said. He did not move from the opening of the room. His body was as still as ice.
“Why are you here?” Ember asked, hesitant. Was he going to blackmail them? She tasted tears on her lips.
“Because I need your help,” Jedoriah answered.
“Why would we help the murderer of our friend?” Noor asked.
“Because my pair was captured. The Dragon Matron has her, and if I did not kill Amir, her and my child would have been in danger.”
My child echoed in Ember's mind.
“I… I don’t understand. I have a sibling?” Ember whispered. There has never been an heir to the dragon throne with a sibling before.
“Do you know where Oma is keeping Karwyn?” Noor questioned more directly, already jumping into the problem.
“No, not Karwyn. The Queen is not my pair.” Jedoriah sat down on Ember’s vanity stool with a bouncing knee.
“But you are the head Knight,” Noor protested, not grasping the truth. There could be only three Knights, one for the queen, one for the Dragon Matron, and one for the Dragon Daughter. The pillar of lies that compelled Ember’s life unraveled one by one.
“The family secret is not that the Queen became fateless while she had a pair. She was fateless, pairless, and blessed…” His voice trailed as if it were the first time he was hearing of this as well.
“Explain,” Ember deadpanned. She dropped back onto the corner of her bed, unable to stand any longer. Noor kept his knife out but lowered his fighting stance.
“I’ve known Omanox all my life. I knew her as Omanox Dragon Daughter when I was five years old and she was just paired. She was thirty years old before she met her heart twin, older than any other Princess before her. She was forty when she had Karwyn. I served the family. First, doing favors for her around the castle while my mother ran the kitchens. Then, when I was old enough I was head of staff in Cruelindime palace for Omanox’s mother. When your great-grandmother died, I moved to this palace and served your grandfather as a gentlemen in waiting. Not a guard, but his helper. I was part of the family. I was trusted,” Jedoriah said with an air of wistfulness. He wanted to share this story.
“When your mother came back from the abduction… there was something wrong about her. The merfolk had done something to her, corrupted her somehow. We knew we had to protect her, she was under constant supervision. But as she sank into madness and her belly grew to house you…” He shook his head.
“Drastic measures were taken. To protect her and the kingdom, I was installed by Omanox as her pretend pair and as Knight of the realm, sworn to secrecy. I was divinely picked to rule with Omanox. Karwyn became Queen in name only.” His puffed chest shared the pride he felt in his actions.
“Don’t you see, Embrence? I was protecting you, your mother, and this kingdom. No one would have understood if they knew the truth. And when the Fateless spread, when we truly understood that all Fateless were without a fated pair like your mother... We knew we had to hide the truth further.”
“So you executed them, as many of them as you could find,” Noor whispered in horror. His sister flashed to mind.
“No, not executed,” he pleaded. "We gave them mercy,” Jedoriah insisted. "If your mother hadn't been Queen... I don't know," he didn't say what he thought, but Ember knew. They would have killed her too.
She pushed her horror away. She had to keep him talking.
“Then why let us stop the killings? Why ask me to support the community homes?” Ember asked.
“Because you are here now. You can help me rule as soon as we’ve killed your grandmother.”
He spoke it as if the idea were an easy favor.
"You want us to help you kill the Queen’s mother?” Noor questioned as the grip on his knife tightened. Hadn’t enough blood been shed already?
“More death. Lies and death.” Ember’s heart clamored, hands sweaty with the reality before her. She pulled herself completely into her bed and covered her body with soul-thread. The thoughts quieted again. Her grandmother and not-father were abductors and murderers and more death was to come.
“My pair, she needs us,” Jedoriah pleaded. “We can work something out. I had to do it, or it would have been my family.”
"Did you kill my moms?" Ember asked, looking at her hands.
"Indirectly, yes," he said without hesitation.
"How?"
"Guards under my orders tortured them for information. They weren't supposed to take it that far. I killed the guards that committed the act."
She felt no comfort in knowing the answer.
Noor pointed his dagger at Jedoriah, punctuating his words.
“I am head Knight now, you understand me? You will leave this room, and we will think about what you’ve said. Do not speak to us unless I seek you out. Understand?”
His reluctant assent was apparent as Jedoriah backed out of their room and closed the door behind him. Ember began to tremble, the adrenaline leaving her system now that they were alone again. She knew now why he pushed so hard to find her. Why her mothers were killed. He wanted out of his arrangement. He wanted his family safe. Anyone who got in his way was a byproduct, a justifiable byproduct. The death of her moms was part of his equation to find her. They were killed in his attempt to get out of the cage they too were trapped in.
She had never felt the blood on her hands as thickly as she did now. Waves of death, pain, and circumstance tumbled into her heart over and over again.
Noor held her in a heavy silence as she watched the sun rise again over her balcony.
Twenty-Four
Four Dead
“I’m here to say goodbye,” Ember whispered as she stared through the frosted window. The days would get colder now leading up to the night of the Mutrien ball.
Ember knew the subject of her confession could not hear her. She shivered, looking at the mother she never got to know. The mother that was taken from her before she was even born. She sat barefoot in the grass and soot, next to the purple flowers Wally had shown Ember on the day she decided to meet the resistance. Kariana's Tears. She picked them from the ground as if they were just wildflowers and not the rare dragon-born blooms.
The kingdom, the scribes - they parroted that it was the merfolk. The mysterious people she had never even seen who had mysteriously infected the future Queen and their kingdom. Ember no longer believed that. This was a punishment. It was a curse. As was everything else in their existence. They had fallen from Aaleia and Mutrien’s grace, and one day soon, the other kingdoms would come to claim the crown she did not even want.
“I understand now,” Ember said to the glass. “I know that my moms took me from you to save me. To save me from Oma,” her voice cracked at the name, “and from a false Knight.”
“They were scared for me, and for the kingdom, I suppose. They took care of me because you couldn't."
Warmth spread through her chest, filling a hole in her heart. Her moms weren't using her for a rebellion. They weren't venomous kidnappers. They were friends of a queen that had gone mad, a queen kept alone and isolated. They saved what part of her they could. Ember had all the pieces of the puzzle now, and they painted a picture as clear as day.
This royal family was rotting and her moms tried to save what innocence was left.
Ember watched as the Queen's guards came in closer to her, steering her away from a fountain. She gripped the flowers in her left palm, hands knuckling white.
Ember wrapped her own arms around her middle with black-gloved hands. She squeezed, and the tears began to come down again.
“Mother, so many people have died for me. How do I live with that? How did you accept this responsibility?” she whispered, curling tighter into herself.
All the Fateless that were murdered for her mother. All those that were killed so that it was easier and more convenient for the crown to keep up its lie. The people murdered to help find the heir. And a sickness that conveniently kept people preoccupied, eyes turned away from the slow siege of power at the palace. The fall from the gods-way. Despite everything that made their way of life possible, Ember had never considered herself very devout. The fating, blessing, the Fateless… It was what was. Were they being punished for the wall, for keeping their kingdom away from outsiders? Or were they cursed long before then? Would she ever be able to right these wrongs? Or would the pain of her family’s decisions haunt what little chance she’d have? Could she find the cure or the exact cause, and right at least this one wrong?
Karwyn stood and lifted her head up into the open sky. She smiled with her eyes closed, her face warmed by the sun.
“Not again,” one of her guards said, instinctually knowing what she was about to do. Karwyn giggled and ran, throwing herself between the two guards that weren't paying as much attention. She threw her hands up, flowers spraying everywhere. One comically landed on the taller guard, falling to the ground. They stumbled and tripped getting back up with dirt in their eyes and a pain in one's ankle.
The Queen ran, faster and more intentional than she’d ever seen her. The smile on her face was wider than Ember had ever seen it. Ember let go of her body, eyes focused on her mother weaving in and out of the trees. She filled in the blank spots of time in her head, for the Queen’s path was blocked from where Ember stood to watch. Ember felt the pure joy of Karwyn’s smile pierce her heart.
“I'll fly to you!” Karwyn yelled as she ran, circles growing wider and more determined, pushing away from the greenery and out to the path that circled this inner garden. The smile turned serious and then to rage as the running guards began to gain steam. Karwyn ran straight past the hidden door Ember herself had been using almost nightly.
Faster the Queen ran and Ember began to understand why the guards had dreaded this. She was practiced. Karwyn did this regularly. Her hands splayed out like wings.
Ember gasped and the pit of her stomach dropped.
“I will find you!” The Queen screamed as she threw her body outward in a leap. Her arms were spread wide in blind faith.
But the Queen’s fantasy was not true. She was not a dragon. She could not escape the grasp of this kingdom any more than Ember could. The Queen fell, dirt and rocks tumbling with her as she landed sprawled on the ground.
Ember turned away as the guards helped her mother stand again. She could not watch the dejection cross her face. A dragon soul, trapped in a human body, unable to fly.
Ember knew the feeling well.
Ember gripped Noor’s chest, her cheek leaning against his back as her horse jostled their movements. She had decided on a name for the horse-beast, after many weeks. He was now Carmain, and he seemed to take to the name well. Was it only weeks ago that Oma gifted him to her? All her life, she had no father, then a cruel one, and now she felt abandoned all over again. No relationship to mourn, but a potential one she didn’t even think she wanted plucked away. And a grandmother she had loved, now fell into a cruelty that felt so sudden that she had no idea how she would cope.
“Why don’t you come into the carriage, Fireheart?” Oma called from the curtained window of her anchoris-drawn carriage.
Ember turned to the other cheek, pushing away her bangs and staring instead to the wall. There was no family left for her here.
“She didn’t sleep well. I believe the fresh air would do her good,” Noor answered for her. His right hand held the reigns as his left covered her own on his chest. His fingers grazed over her pearl ring, cleaned and back on her hand. The ring would never be the same, just like her. She’d have to toughen up, to keep her feelings hidden again in front of the Dragon Matron, but she didn’t know how. How do you bring back up years of repression and years of hiding after feeling free?
Karwyn and Jedoriah left the castle gates. While Ember and Noor would lead one side of the kingdom with Omanox, Karwyn and Jedoriah would visit the other. They’d converge at the end of Ashkadance in Oma’s castle for the final ball of the year. Ember wondered if she’d get tired of all the balls, two a year for the rest of her life. That is, if she survived her family.
Her tutor, Ahnika, breezed past them on her horse. She appeared free and wild in a way Ember had never seen before. Her brown mare galloped around the party as it departed down the long drive of the castle. Her education would continue on this trip, Ahnika promising to take her to important sites of their history as they toured the provinces.
“Don't think you’ll escape your lessons!” Ahnika said as she galloped past.
But they seemed to forget that Ember knew each province well. She had lived in every one of them but the two castle capitals. She had been everywhere and seen everything. That is, everything except for where her birth mother was kept and where her pair had been raised -- The twin capitals, where the royal family lived. But all seven other provinces? They were as familiar to her as breathing. Ember found herself missing Cindrea. When they reached Cruelindime, she’d want to tell her everything. She may be the only female friend in her life now, if they didn’t find Hasley.
Their first stop on this kingdom-wide tour was, of course, their capital province and home of their castle, Azororion. The last time she had been into the city in the daytime was after her fating to Noor. The day she told him her birth mother was ill, and he bought her this ring. It was also the day he sent out the code word to join the resistance. Would Amir had died if he hadn’t? Karwyn and Jedoriah would be part of this first visit, then they’d separate to their opposite directions.
From there, they would visit Faymader and Judcree, the two closest provinces to the west. When they reached Cruelindime, where Oma’s castle lay, Ember would finally get to meet Noor’s parents. She ignored that fact, as traveling with a now-known manipulator and murderer turned her veins to ice. Noor seemed to thrive on these new challenges, even telling her that he hoped to uncover where Oma was keeping Jedoriah’s pair during this trip. Ember couldn't bear to think of it. She couldn't form words.
Oma's breath of deception had been so wide, Ember felt buried in it.
“Four other deaths,” a voice whispered beside her.
Ember startled from her thoughts, looking up to see Wally beside them. He spoke casually, to not draw attention, as if he were speaking of the weather. His voice was low, mindful of the other people both ahead and behind.
“Who?” Noor asked shortly. Ember could feel his fear.
“Two children, one Scribe, and a local merchant. No one we know,” he answered from the side of his mouth. His hair was shorter than yesterday, a fresh cut for the journey. The consolation did nothing to bury her pain.
In Amir’s death, Wally took his place as Captain. It had been a weird request, asking for her Captain to not do the tour with her, but they agreed. Noor was enough security, she said. Ember played the romance card, saying she didn't want to separate him from Zhieve. Ember glanced down at his new pin, recalling that introductory conversation with Amir. He had planned for this. Planned for his death. Now Zhieve’s pair was also a Captain of the guard. Two men with a sacred duty that kept them in harm’s way.
“They will be available to you if ever I am sick, help with shift changes, and would be my replacement if I were to die,” Amir had said that first full day in the castle. Always the protector, always prepared.
Ember closed her eyes at the mention of
children.
Her scales seemed to raise in the cold air, but thankfully she had worn her only dress that hid them today. The sleeves were fitted, long and grey, but as they would be riding - her skirts weren’t as full today. Instead, she wore thick coverings on her legs for warmth beneath them. It made straddling the horse easier too, she did not want to worry about her clothing as she mourned and simultaneously met her people. They deserved a true Queen. She feared meeting that standard.
“Jade and Jardano?” Ember asked quietly.
“Angry but unharmed,” he said. He reigned his horse back, its anxious hooves trying to move on.
“We begin then,” Noor responded.
“With what?” Ember asked behind his back. She gripped onto him harder, feeling the heartbeat beneath his chest.
“Our ascension,” he replied with a promise.
Their ride to the market center was longer than Ember remembered. The trip she had originally put her whole faith in felt more like a death march now. With each gallop of the horse, she imagined Hasley dead beside Amir with twin stab wounds.
As dark as the thoughts and feelings were, she felt safe in the arms of Noor. He was the only part of her that felt settled and calm while the storm of her life swirled around her as if in a sea mist.
As the sounds of people started to build, Ember reopened her eyes and peered over Noor’s shoulder. Crowds had gathered along the market, people streaming from each door as their precession grew closer. There were fewer people during their first trip, but that was a spontaneous outing. The people knew for days she would be coming.
As their eyes landed on her and Noor together, their voices climbed. Ember felt her heart tumble. It was as if it were her first day at the palace again, expectation and reverence overwhelming her senses.
Ember’s hand gripped Noor’s as he helped her off of Carmain. Her hands held his so tightly, he had to turn a wince into a smile as he detached from her grip. He instead cradled her with an arm over the shoulder. His white shirt was unbuttoned at the top. A single strand of gold circled close to his neck with one lone adornment, a crystalline fating bead. She was glad she had finally made it for him, ecstatic that the supplies came to the palace in time for one calming jewelry session before their trip.
Royalty Fantasy Boxset: Ember Dragon Daughter & Hasley Fateless (Fated Tales Series 1 & 1.5) (The Fated Tales Series: YA Royalty Fantasy) Page 20