Aiden snorts beside me and rolls over, dragging his arm with him. I watch his chest rise and fall and feel my own heart squeeze.
I feel more at home here with him than I do in New York, going to my corporate job and telling myself that I’m doing something good.
Walking through the woods feels good. Learning about the plants and animals that live here feels good. Building a community garden and getting to know the people of Lang Creek feels good. Going to work and seeing the mobilization of excavators, dump trucks, chipper trucks, and huge loads of materials does not feel good.
The day after tomorrow is Monday, and I have to go back to work. The site offices are ready and most of the preliminary team is here, so the official start of construction is in less than 48 hours. That thought used to fill me with excitement. It’s my first big job! It’s the first job where I’ve been leading the environmental team. Now, the thought of starting construction only fills me with dread. Aiden snorts beside me again, as if he can feel the turmoil in my heart.
I can’t take it anymore. I’m driving myself crazy, lying here thinking about these things. I slide out of bed and shiver as the cold morning air in the cabin hits my body. I grab the closest piece of clothing – one of Aiden’s shirts, and I slip into it. It goes all the way down to my knees and I wrap it around me. I take a moment to inhale the smell of his shirt, smiling as I look back at his sleeping body. He brought in my crutches, and I grab one of them to lean against as I hop out of the room.
I hobble to the living room and see the dying embers of last night’s fire in the wood stove. I open the glass door and poke at the embers, sticking another log on top of them with some old newspaper. I watch as the paper catches fire and the new log starts to burn. I stand and watch the log burn, feeling the warmth of the fire seep through to my bones.
I turn toward the small kitchen and see a coffee maker. It looks well-used, and it only takes me a few moments to find the coffee and put a pot on. Soon, the smell of fresh coffee is filling the small cabin. I lean against the counter and look around the room.
This is where Aiden has lived for who-knows-how-many years. Two small rooms with an outdoor shower. One sofa, one wood-burning stove, and a small kitchen.
This is the exact opposite of my luxury apartment in New York. The coffee machine gurgles behind me for a couple more minutes until I take out a mug and pour myself a cup. I bring the cup up to my nose and inhale the fresh scent of coffee, closing my eyes to enjoy this simple pleasure.
“You’re up early,” Aiden’s gravelly voice makes me jump. I open my eyes and see him emerging from the bedroom. His eyes scan the room, taking in the new fire and the fresh pot of coffee. “I’m used to waking up alone, but I was hoping to wake up next to you.”
A smile drifts onto my face as he takes a step closer to me. He leans down and places a soft kiss on my lips. When he stands up, his eyes are soft and he runs his finger along my cheek.
“I made coffee,” I say, nodding to the pot. Aiden smiles and nods.
“Not used to having a woman around,” he says with a grin.
“Don’t get any ideas,” I respond, elbowing him in the ribs. “I’m a career woman, remember?”
“A career woman who’s wearing my shirt and looks incredibly sexy standing in my kitchen,” he growls. He leans over to kiss me again and all the worries from this morning evaporate. With Aiden next to me, all I feel is peace and contentment, and that familiar spark between my legs.
24
Aiden
I wrap my arms around Maddy and hold her tight against me. Ever since I found her in the woods, I don’t want to let her out of my sight. I hardly know the woman, but I’m drawn to her in a way that I’ve never felt before. I pull away and kiss her one more time, lifting her up so she’s sitting on the kitchen counter in front of me. She makes the sexiest little giggle as I lift her up, and she wraps her arms around my neck.
“How’s the ankle this morning?” I ask.
She shrugs. “It’s fine. Better. Still might be a couple days before I can walk right.” She grins at me. “But that might have something to do with last night as well.”
A growl passes through my chest and I bring my lips to hers again. Her lips taste like the sweetest strawberries, and every time I look at her, I just want to press them to mine. She slips her tongue into my mouth and I groan, pressing my body against hers. I wrap my arms around her waist and slide her forward until she’s on the edge of the countertop. She melts into me, kissing me harder and tangling her fingers into my hair. I groan as my cock starts to pulse between my legs. Anytime she’s near, I can hardly control myself.
I pull away from her and run my finger along her jaw. “What’s bothering you?” I whisper.
Her face contorts and she looks away. Her eyes get a distant look in them and her brows knit together. She shakes her head slightly and takes a deep breath.
“I feel like I don’t know myself anymore. I’ve spent so much time trying to make my own way.” She pauses and looks back at me. “My father owns a company, and it was always expected that I’d go and work for him. Pursuing environmental engineering was a big deal. It’s been my entire identity since I was a teenager. I’ve always been the tree-hugging daughter of the oil and gas tycoon.”
I try to keep my face steady as she takes another deep, raking breath. She looks at me again and shakes her head.
“Ever since I’ve come here…” She pauses, putting her hand on my chest. “Ever since I saw you speak at that town hall meeting, everything seems like it’s crumbling down. I don’t know who I am anymore. Dad is sick, and I don’t know if I’m doing the right thing, and – ”
Maddy’s voice breaks and her face scrunches as she brings her hands up to hide it. I stroke her arm, opening my mouth to speak but not knowing what to say.
“Maddy…” I say slowly. She drops her hand and shakes her head.
“This is embarrassing. I’m sorry. I hardly even know you. I don’t know why I’m telling you all this.” She lifts her face up to mine and I see the pain in her eyes. I want to ask her about her dad, ask her about her life, but she shakes her head.
“I went up the mountain to try to figure all this out. I’ve been going into work and doing all the things I’ve done for years, but suddenly it feels fake. I was walking, looking at these forests and thinking I’m making a mistake.”
I nod, feeling my heart grow in my chest as she speaks. I thought she was one of them, one of those corporate vampires that just feed off small towns like Lang Creek. But the look on her face – it’s so genuine. She gets it. She gets the power of the mountains and she understands how precious they are.
Maddy takes another deep breath and lifts her eyes up to me. Her eyebrows draw together. “Do you hate me? Do you hate me for being one of them?”
I shake my head. “I don’t think I could hate you. Even the fact that you’re thinking all these things makes me think more of you than I can say.”
She nods slowly and I see tears gathering in her eyes. I want to comfort her. I want to tell her that it’s okay, but what can I say? On Monday she’ll go back to her job and the hotel will be built. In a few months, she’ll leave. I’ve only known her a couple weeks; I can’t ask her to change her whole life just because she’s spent a bit of time walking in the woods. I move my hand up and down her thigh and clear my throat.
“What’s wrong with your dad?” I ask. She flicks her eyes up to me and then back down. She shakes her head from side to side.
“He’s sick.”
There’s a finality to her words, and I can tell she doesn’t want to talk about it. My chest feels heavy and I open my mouth. I want to tell her about my dad, about how he raised us and how he died, but the words won’t come out. Mara McCoy’s face flashes through my mind and the black anger in my heart starts to grow.
I look back at Maddy and wrap my hands around her waist, giving her a gentle squeeze.
“You just have to figure out what you bel
ieve in,” I say. “And follow that.”
A tear rolls down her cheek and I worry that I’ve said the wrong thing. It was a stupid thing to say anyway, it’s just a platitude that doesn’t mean anything. I open my mouth again but she speaks first.
“What if what I believe in is exactly the opposite of what I’m doing? Even if I walk away, the hotel will still be built. They’ll get someone else to do the paperwork I do and the corporation will still make their money. And plus, if I walk away then my career is finished. Everything I’ve worked for years to build will be gone.” She takes a deep breath and rises a bit straighter, brushing her eyes and forcing a smile.
“I’m sorry. You want some coffee?”
I nod my head, ignoring the lump in my throat. She hops down from the counter and hobbles to the coffee machine. She pours me a mug of coffee and grabs her own and I can tell from her face that our conversation is over. Our fingers brush against each other when she hands me the mug, and her eyes linger on mine for a moment. The depth of her pain is obvious to me and all I want to do is make it go away.
She hops toward me and puts a hand on my shoulder. She kisses my cheek and pulls away, smiling gently at me.
“Thank you for saving me,” she says with a smile. “And for listening to my quarter-life crisis.”
I chuckle and press my lips to hers. She tastes like coffee, and I open my mouth to kiss her deeper. When I pull away, I tuck her hair behind her ear and smile at her.
“I’d listen to you all day long,” I say. I nod to the fire. “Let’s sit over there. We can watch the sun come up from the couch. It’s what I’ve done every morning for the past ten years,” I admit. She smiles.
“I’d love to.”
25
Madeline
I hobble into the site office on my crutches and get exactly the greeting I’ve been expecting. A healthy mix of concern and laughter erupts as I walk in. I nod and smile and roll my eyes. Barry comes up to my desk and nods at my ankle.
“Everything okay?”
“Just a bit of a sprain. Should be okay in a couple days,” I respond. He nods again and I take a deep breath. Usually I feel completely at ease around Barry, but these days it feels tense. I think he can sense my reluctance on the project.
“Have you finished those applications we spoke about last week? For the sports complex on the north side of the hotel?”
I gulp and shake my head. “Not yet, sorry Barry. I’ll have them done by the end of the day.”
Barry’s face sours and I know he isn’t happy with me. He nods curtly and gets up again, heading toward his desk. The site offices are small and simple, just a few portables in the woods. I have one steel-toed boot on my good leg, and I slide my bright high-vis vest on over my jacket.
I glance around the office at the engineers, surveyors, project managers, and I wonder if any of them feel the way I do. Do any of them think what we’re doing is wrong? Do any of them see the beauty of the mountains and forests and animals around us?
I turn to see one of the engineers laughing with a construction supervisor and the sound grates on my ears. It doesn’t seem like anyone cares. They love driving the big machines and cutting down trees. They like digging holes and pouring concrete.
They like destroying these pristine, virgin forests that the people of Lang Creek have called home for generations.
I shake my head. I can’t think like that. My coworkers aren’t bad people. I’m not a bad person. Before I came to Lang Creek, I worked on countless projects that would have had the same impact on the environment, or worse. I never gave it a second thought.
Cecilia drops a mug of coffee on my desk and smiles at me. “You alright? You look a little worse for wear today. I didn’t see you at the community garden yesterday.”
That’s because I was busy having sex with Aiden all weekend.
“Just the ankle,” I respond. “Took it easy this weekend.”
Cecilia nods. She searches my face again and frowns. “Are you okay?”
I nod, maybe a bit too vigorously. “I’m fine. Thanks for the coffee. I should probably get cracking on this application for the sports complex, Barry didn’t seem too happy that it was late.”
Cecilia nods and stares at my face for a few moments longer. She finally leaves my desk and I turn back to my computer, letting out a long sigh.
Ever since this project started, it’s been harder and harder to fake my way along. I just don’t have the drive or the belief that we’re doing the right thing, and it makes it almost impossible to do my job.
I shift in my seat and my ankle throbs. I wince. It’s like a constant physical reminder of the weight on my shoulders. Maybe spraining my ankle was a sign that I shouldn’t be here.
The application for the sports complex is started, and I get to work completing it. I work diligently, trying to minimize the impact the complex will have on the surrounding areas. I make sure to include extra environmental controls and extra barricades for the public in the diagrams for the application. I classify the development more strictly than we’d first discussed. I glance up at Barry, knowing the additions will cost the company thousands once they’re approved by the Department.
At least if I’m here, working for this company, I can do my best to minimize our impact.
The day goes by and I finish the application, with all the extra controls. I send it over to Barry and use my crutches to walk over to his desk.
“That application is done now, so I’ll send it through whenever you’ve approved it.”
“Just send it, Maddy. I’ve worked with you long enough to trust your work.”
My chest squeezes as I think of all the additions I’ve made. It’s a drop in the bucket for the company, but it still feels wrong to deceive Barry. I hobble back to my desk and send the application through to submit it. I let out a big sigh and lean back in my chair.
My head is a mess. I don’t know what the right thing to do is. I’m still working for this construction company, so I’m still complicit in the destruction of the forest. Now I’m not doing my job well, because I’m costing my own company thousands in extra environmental controls.
Maybe I should just quit. If I quit, then someone else will take over and at least I won’t have it on my conscience. Just as the thought crosses my mind, a text comes through on my phone. It’s Aiden, and I unlock my phone to see a photo of the mountains from the viewpoint where he took me the first day.
I stare at the photo and my heart squeezes in my chest. If I quit, then I have to go back to New York. There’s nothing for me here, but I’m not yet ready to leave Aiden. I feel drawn to him in a way that I’ve never felt drawn to a man before.
If I quit, I’m being true to myself but I’m giving up my chance to be with this complex, understanding, gentle, strong, beautiful man. I’ll be leaving right as we’re starting to get to know each other.
I send a quick text back, asking to meet him tonight. I can’t imagine sleeping on my own again, not after spending the weekend in his arms. When I got back to the hotel this morning, Margaret McCoy gave me a loaded look. I know if I’m away for more than a few nights she’ll start asking questions, but right now I can’t be bothered to care.
I want to see Aiden. With my career such a head wreck, the construction of the hotel so conflicting, and with my dad sick, Aiden is the only thing that feels right anymore. When I’m with him, it feels like things might work out.
My shoulders relax and a smile drifts across my face when he answers my text.
Obviously I want to meet up tonight. Pick you up at the hotel at 7.
My heart jumps in my chest and I smile a bit wider. Even with everything else falling to pieces around me, Aiden is my anchor in the storm. I know that he’s a good person, and maybe if I spend time with him, I’ll figure out how to make sense of everything.
26
Aiden
This time when I drive my father’s old truck into town, I don’t feel nervous. I drive strai
ght to the McCoy hotel and I don’t care who sees me. It doesn’t matter who says what, who talks about me, what they say. It doesn’t matter that Mara McCoy ripped my family apart and her family stole our livelihood. None of that matters, because a beautiful woman called Madeline Croft wants to see me.
When I’m with her, all the pain that I’ve clung on to seems to ease. I actually want to spend time with her, to be in the company of another human. All day today, all I could think about was her laugh, and the way her nose scrunches when she thinks something’s funny. When she’s laughing really hard, she doesn’t make any noise at all.
I pull up outside the hotel and jump out as Maddy emerges from the front door, kicking the door open with a crutch and making her way toward me. She’s wearing tight jeans and a shirt with a light sweater over it, and she looks amazing. She could wear anything and she’d look incredible. When I woke up and saw her in my shirt on Saturday morning, I thought it was the sexiest thing I’d ever seen.
We hardly say a word to each other as I help her into the truck. I see some movement in the hotel window, and I smile to myself. That’ll be Margaret McCoy, keeping an eye on everything that’s going on. By the end of the night, everyone will know that Maddy got into my truck.
I jump in behind the steering wheel and look at Maddy. “You know that you’ll be the talk of the town, right? Are you sure you want to be seen with me?”
Maddy grins and my cock starts to pulse. “I’m sure,” she says. “Maybe they’ll fire me and it’ll solve all my problems.”
“Except the hotel being built,” I say. Her face falls and I immediately regret my words.
“True,” she says, shifting her gaze to look out the window. I grimace and start driving the truck. I take a deep breath and try again. I’m not used to speaking to anyone, let alone a beautiful woman who wants to spend time with me.
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