by Ivy Smoak
"So that's it. She's just scared of the movie."
"I guess. I don't know why she's projecting the snake on me though."
"We're all worried about you, Penny. Kids are smart. They can pick up on stuff like that."
"Yeah, I know." I ran my fingers through Scarlett's hair. "James worries all the time about being a bad father. Yet, I'm the one terrifying our daughter."
"Penny, you're a great mom. Right up there with Hailey and my own mother."
I smiled. "Thanks, Tyler. It's late, I should probably get us to bed." I scooted off the side of the bed.
"You can spend the night if you want," he said. "The bed is certainly big enough."
I laughed. "I appreciate the offer, but we paid for a perfectly good room down the hall." I leaned over the bed to reach for Scarlett.
"Do you want me to carry her for you?"
"No, I've got her." I lifted her up into my arms.
She moaned lightly in her sleep.
"Thanks for tonight, Tyler. It was just what I needed."
"Any time, Penny." He yawned and switched off the television. "Goodnight."
"Goodnight." I walked out into the hall. This time I had no trouble finding my keycard. I carried Scarlett into our hotel room and switched on the lights so I wouldn't trip on the way to the bed.
But that made Scarlett open her eyes. She looked around for a moment, slightly disoriented.
"Can't we sleep in Axel's room?" she said. "It's slumber party."
I laid her down in the bed. "We're going to sleep in here tonight." I pushed her bangs off her forehead and pulled the covers up around her.
"But, Mommy, I'm scared."
"There's nothing to be scared of." I leaned over and kissed her forehead.
"I miss Daddy. The snake never comes when Daddy is here."
I swallowed hard. "Scar, there is no snake. Didn't Daddy tell you that earlier today?"
"No, he said you were scared of him and that I shouldn't talk about him coming anymore. But I'm scared of him too."
She blinked up at me in the most innocent way. But the words she said weren't innocent. They were haunting.
What was I supposed to say in response to her words? I took a deep breath and grabbed her hand. "Baby girl, there are no snake monsters. And there's nothing coming for us. Now, I'm going to go get ready for bed. And then we can have snuggles, okay?"
She let go of my hand and gripped the top of the sheets in her fists. "Okay, Mommy. But we could sleep with Uncle Tyler. Or Uncle Rob. Or Uncle Matt. Or Uncle Mason..."
"Scar, I can take care of us. There's absolutely nothing to worry about."
She pressed her lips together, like she was considering the possibility. "Can you look under the bed?"
I smiled. "Of course." I slowly got down on my hands and knees and looked under the bed. "Nothing there," I said and got back to my feet. "I'll be right back." I kissed her forehead and made my way over to my suitcase.
I almost started crying when I opened it up. There was one of James' t-shirts sitting on the top of the rest of the items, with a note. I picked up the slip of paper.
My beautiful wife,
In case you can't sleep without feeling close to me. I'll be back before you know it. Call me when you wake up. I miss you already.
Love always,
James
I quickly got ready for bed and then pulled his shirt over my head. James' cologne immediately surrounded me. It calmed me better than anything else in the world.
But a clicking noise disrupted any calming effect the shirt had. "Scar?" I opened up the bathroom door and walked out when there was no response. "Scar?" I turned toward the bed and froze when she wasn't lying where I had left her. "Scarlett?!" I glanced around the room, but it was completely empty.
"Scarlett!" Fear gripped my heart as I ran to the door. Oh God. Oh God. I ran out into the hall and stared at my daughter wreaking havoc on a whole floor of The Plaza Hotel.
Scarlett was at the opposite end of the hall, banging on a door. "Uncle Mason!" she screamed at the top of her lungs.
"Scar, what are you doing?" I hissed.
She turned toward me. But then immediately ran to another door, farther away from me. "Uncle Tyler!" she yelled and banged on the door.
"Scarlett, stop it." I started walking toward her. "You're going to wake up everyone on the floor." Ow. Not right now, baby boy. I stopped and placed my hand on the wall. A searing pain hit my chest right after another kick in the ribs. I closed my eyes for a second.
"Uncle Matt!" Scarlett screamed as she banged on another door.
"Scarlett Hunter, stop that right now," I said sternly and opened my eyes. "Come over here."
She just ran to another door. "Uncle Rooooob!"
Damn it, Scar. I put my hand on the center of my chest and pushed myself off the wall. Ow. I knew she had scared me. That's why my chest hurt. It's just in my head.
Scarlett started banging on another door.
"Scar, please stop. Please stop for Mommy." She hadn't listened to my demand. Maybe she'd listen to me begging.
Matt walked out of one of the rooms she had banged on earlier, wearing nothing but a pair of boxers.
"Uncle Matt!" Scarlett said and ran over to him. She jumped into his arms as he leaned down to talk to her.
I slowly hobbled over to them. "Scar, you can't run off like that. We just talked about this the other day. What were you thinking?"
"It's okay," Matt said. "I got her."
"And what if it hadn't been you? What if it had been some stranger that just snatched her up?"
"But it was me." He said it slowly.
I knew he was trying to calm me, but I didn't think anything could calm me down. "You promised you wouldn't leave without a grown-up, Scarlett. Get over here, right now."
"I said I wouldn't leave the house," Scarlett said and hugged Matt's torso even tighter. "We're not in our house, Mommy."
For God's sake. When had my daughter become a smart ass?
"And we need Uncle Matt to sleep with us," she said before I could respond.
Matt laughed.
"We don't need anyone else, Scar. I told you I'd take care of you."
"Yes we do!" she yelled. "Because the snake is going to get you and you can't stop it. And then I'll be alone. We need Uncle Matt. We'll sleep in his room tonight." Scarlett pointed to his door.
"Actually, kiddo, you can't go in there right this second." He awkwardly ran his hand through his hair.
Not only had we most likely awakened half the floor, we had interrupted Matt in the middle of whatever normal single people did at weddings. Which was clearly sex. There was no doubt in my mind that he had a naked woman lying on his bed, waiting for him to return.
"Come on, Scar. We're going back to our room. I'm so sorry, Matt."
She gripped Matt even tighter and turned to face him. "But the snake is going to kill my mommy."
My chest hurt. And I thought someone had kidnapped my daughter. And I missed James. And I was seven months pregnant with a son who wouldn't stop kicking me. And I didn't want to die. God, I didn't want to even think about death. It was like her words had pushed me over the tipping point. I couldn't even help it. I burst into tears.
"Mommy?" Scarlett said.
I turned away. "Can you just...can you hold her for a second, Matt?" I tried to wipe away my tears as fast as possible. I tried so hard to be strong in front of Scarlett. I never, ever wanted her to see me cry. And I had just ruined everything. Now she'd know that I wasn't invincible. But clearly she already knew that if she thought a snake would be the end of me. Fuck, stop crying.
"Mommy?" she said again.
I tried to take a deep breath. Ow.
"Let's get you girls back to your room," Matt said and put his hand in mine.
I should have pulled my hand out of his. I should have been able to tell Scarlett no and get her back into our room on my own. But my chest still hurt. My stomach still hurt. Everything just h
urt. And Matt's hand was comforting. The fact that Scarlett was comforted by him was also a huge plus.
"But you'll stay the night?" Scarlett asked as he walked us down the hall.
"Yeah, sure," he said.
I knew he just said it to calm her down. But the thought of Matt coming into my room in nothing but boxers made me cringe. James was jealous enough as it was. This wasn't going to help. I wiped away the remaining tears on my cheeks. "I can take her now," I said when we reached our door.
"No!" she yelled at the top of her lungs. "I want Uncle Matt."
She was a little terror. When had she become impossible for me to handle alone? I guess daddy's girls wreaked havoc whenever their fathers weren't around.
"It's fine," Matt said. "Key?" He nodded to the door.
Shit. I hadn't grabbed the key when I had run out looking for her. I reached out and turned the handle, but it was locked. "It's in the room." I leaned my back against the door. Why me?
"You're going to sit with your Mom while I go get another room key, okay, Scar?" he said.
"No," she replied and hugged him even tighter.
He gave me a tight-lipped smile.
"I'll go get it," I said.
"No you're..." his voice trailed off. "You're only wearing a shirt."
I completely forgot that I was inappropriately dressed. Normally James' t-shirts covered me pretty well, but with my pregnant stomach they barely covered my panties. I awkwardly tugged on the hem of the shirt. "But you're just wearing boxers."
He laughed. "It won't be my first time making a scene in a hotel lobby." He adjusted Scarlett on his hip. "We'll be right back." He winked at me and made his way to the elevator.
Scarlett didn't yell to stay with me. Or cry for being taken away. She clung to him like she loved him more than anyone else in the world. As they disappeared onto the elevator, I let my back slide down the door, until my butt hit the hallway carpet. And I cried. I cried and I couldn't seem to stop.
Chapter 26
Sunday
"Do you want to talk about it?" Matt asked.
I opened my eyes and looked up at him. "Where is Scarlett?"
"With Rob and Daphne. She seemed perfectly content in his arms. Wasn't anything special about me except that I was a man, I guess."
I laughed. "Well whatever it was, she wanted you more than she wanted me."
"Do you want to talk about it?" he asked again.
"Not really."
"I got your keycard." He put his hand out for me and helped me get to my feet.
"Thank you. Is the little monster that used to be my daughter spending the rest of the night with Rob and Daphne?"
"Yup. It's just us." He put my keycard in the door and pushed it open for me.
I stared at him apprehensively. "Thank you for coming to my rescue tonight with Scar. And for getting my key. I really appreciate it. But it's the middle of the night. And you're practically naked." I gestured to the chiseled abs staring back at me.
"So are you."
I tugged on the bottom of my shirt again. "Goodnight, Matt," I said.
He crossed his arms as he leaned against the doorjamb. "Look, it's true, I think you're beautiful. And sweet and kind."
"Matt..."
"Let me finish," he said with a laugh. "I like pushing your buttons because you get all flustered." He smiled. "Sure, if you were single, I would have tried to sleep with you years ago. But I promise I'm not trying to steal you away from James. I just like messing with you."
Rob used to say something similar to me. Like he enjoyed seeing me blush or something. "Am I really so fun to mess with?"
"Absolutely. So will you let your guard down for two seconds and tell me why your daughter is insisting that a snake is going to murder you in your sleep?"
"Is that what she said to you?"
"Something along those lines."
"God." I walked past him into the room. "She just saw a scary movie. It's nothing."
"So the tears..."
"What would you do if your kid wouldn't stop talking about your impending death? How am I supposed to comfort her when I don't..." I let my voice trail off. "I'm too young to die." My eyes started to get watery again.
"There it is." He opened his arms like he wanted to hug me.
"I'm not hugging you when you're only wearing boxers."
He lifted up his arm and sniffed his armpit. "What? I smell fine, I swear."
"Matt."
"I just told you I didn't love you. What's the big deal? All our friends can screw themselves. You know I love you, but just as a friend. Come on." He gestured to his chest. When I didn't move, he sighed. "If the pregnant stomach wasn't enough to remind me that you're off limits, the hickey James left you with would be."
I put my hand on the side of my neck. I had forgotten that James' kisses had probably left a mark.
"Or the fact that I heard you two fucking in that restroom a few hours ago and you very much enjoying it. Or that he threatened to kill me if I hit on you."
"He did not." My words were meaningless. I had seen James pull Matt off the dance floor. Of course he had threatened him. I didn't doubt it for a second.
Matt shrugged. "Regardless, I'm not hitting on you. I'm being a good friend. You know that, Penny." He gave me the signature Caldwell smile.
"Fine. I'll take that hug now." I didn't care that it was inappropriate to be hugging Matt in his boxers. I didn't care that James would probably be upset. Because right now, I just needed a hug.
He laughed and wrapped his arms around me.
And for just a second, I didn't feel so alone. Was that really what was bothering me? Did I feel abandoned? I tried to shake away the thought. Scarlett loved me. She was just scared. And James would be back soon enough.
"You're not going to die, Penny. I'm sure James has you going to the best doctors."
I didn't respond. "You should probably get back to your room."
"There's no rush. Tiffany already fell asleep. Or was her name Stephanie?"
I laughed. "You're ridiculous."
"It was definitely Tiffany. Actually, I was thinking about it and maybe I should give that online dating thing a try."
"Really?"
He released me from his hug. "Yeah. Maybe you could help me sign up to one of those sites?"
"Um...yes!"
"I'm glad you're smiling, but I don't mean right this second. Why are you so excited about this anyway?"
"I met James when I was young. I know people who did the whole online dating thing, but I never experienced it. I think it'll be fun."
"Maybe for you. You won't have to go on the dates."
"Right. I just get to catfish a bunch of people for you."
"What? No. I meant you could help me set up a profile. Not respond to people. I don't want you to pretend to be me."
"We'll see."
He shook his head.
"And what about Tiffany? You don't want to date her?"
He shrugged. "I want a woman who cries when I leave. Not snores and rolls over."
"Someone needy? Got it."
"Not needy, Penny. Just someone who needs me."
"I get that."
"But I probably should get back to the snorer. If you're good?"
"I'm good."
He smiled. "Night, Penny."
"Hey, Matt?"
He turned around before he reached the door.
"All that stuff you said about James. About why I chose him. And that I didn't know what he was like before I met him..."
"I was joking." He smiled. "Just wanted to see how flustered I could get you."
"Oh. Right."
He laughed. "You know where my room is if you need anything else."
"Mhm. Goodnight, Matt." I watched the door close behind him. I turned and looked at the bed. Despite my brain telling me not to, I got down on my hands and knees and looked under it. I shook my head. There are no snakes in The Plaza Hotel. I climbed into bed and turned the light o
ff. But instead of closing my eyes, I just stared at the ceiling. James wouldn't land for another several hours. I bit the inside of my lip. A voicemail would be a nice thing to land to, though. Besides, I really just needed to hear his voice. I grabbed my phone off the nightstand and clicked on James' name. His voicemail switched on automatically.
"You've reached James. Leave your name and number, and I'll get back to you as soon as I can."
I smiled at the sound of his voice. "Hey, James," I said after the beep. "I know you're probably a hundred miles from home by now. And you can't answer your phone until you land. I think I can actually feel the distance. Is that crazy?" I laughed. It sounded sad in the empty room. I rolled onto my side and stared at the empty spot beside me. "I can't fall asleep because the bed is too empty without you. Try to finish up and get back to us as fast as you can, okay? I miss you. Scar misses you. Liam misses you." I put my hand on my stomach and smiled. "And we can't wait to see you when you get back. I love you." Suddenly I thought I might cry. I was desperate for his touch. We had only been apart for a few hours. How could I feel his absence so completely? I cleared my throat. "I just wanted to warn you that I'll probably sleep on your side of the bed when I get home tomorrow night. Thanks for leaving the shirt, but I feel like your scent has already disappeared." I laughed, but it sounded forced. "Have a safe trip, James. I'll see you in a few days." I hung up before my tears could start falling.
Chapter 27
Sunday
"Looks like you two had fun last night," I said as I sat down at the table where Jen and Ian were seated.
Jen put her hand on her forehead. "Ugh. It feels like a dump truck ran over my face."
Ian laughed.
"Don't laugh at me," she said and put her head on his shoulder. "You're not allowed to laugh at your fiancée. It's like...a rule."
He kissed her forehead. "Noted. Do you want me to get you some water or something?"
She sighed and lifted her head. "No, I've got it. If I don't move I'm going to fall asleep." She slowly stood up. "Be right back. Don't talk about me when I'm gone," she said and pointed back and forth between Ian and me.
"We won't," I said and started to pick at my eggs. I wasn't planning on talking about her. But I was planning on bringing up something she didn't want me to. As soon as she was out of earshot, I set down my fork. "Are you really moving back to New York?"