by Stead, Nick
A sudden thirst gripped me, or perhaps it was merely the need to cleanse my mouth of the unwholesome taste left by Mel’s blood, plus the bile I’d brought up. I had to punch a hole in the ice to get at the fluid my body now craved, the water freezing as my paw smashed through, but I was rewarded with perhaps the most refreshing drink of my entire life. Water had never tasted so pure, my tongue lapping it up until the salty, coppery taste went away. I felt better, but only a little.
Snow still fell but some of the cloud cover was thinning. Moonlight shone through the veil, as if it was determined to make one last stand before it sunk beneath the horizon and the sun took its place. It was just strong enough to show my reflection in the circle of water I’d created, and I looked into the face of the monster I had become.
There was no hint of the boy I had been there, all human features gone. I saw only the wolf looking back at me, its head no different to the creatures I’d always loved, its pelt bearing the same markings as its mortal cousins. In full wolf form I could have passed for any timber wolf.
There was nothing natural about my body from the neck down. The fur still bore the patterns of a timber wolf, but my shape remained stuck in that twisted mix of human and animal, and where before there had been awe for such hybrid forms, now it looked nothing short of hideous.
The monster looked back at me with sad, empty eyes, lost in despair. Then something changed. Despair turned to hunger, and a flash of teeth revealed the other half of my personality.
With an angry roar, I swiped at the water, spraying it out across the ice. The reflection was driven away and I turned my back before it reappeared, wishing I could do the same to the wolf. But the moon was breaking free of the clouds and its light was growing stronger. The wolf wanted to hunt again, and no matter how I wrestled to keep control, it was just too strong. Someone else was going to die.
I was too hungry to bother completing the transformation. The scent of blood was blowing to me on the wind, calling me to hunt. I obeyed, following the trail at a run without giving it a second thought.
My nose guided me to a piece of glass, a set of bloody paw prints leading away from it. I sniffed the prints and picked up the scent of a young bitch. From the size of them it looked like she was big enough to provide the proper meal my belly ached for, but she was no stray. Another set of prints ran beside hers – her human master. Seeing that only made me hungrier. Perhaps I’d kill them both.
I broke into another run, catching up with them with ease. The scent of her blood was strong in my nostrils now, marking the dog as my first victim. And she never stood a chance, limping in the snow while I bounded across on all fours, full of a grace and agility she’d had bred out of her. But it looked like she did sense me coming, her head turning this way and that with a sudden uneasiness. She seemed to catch my scent a moment later – she gave a yelp and started to strain against her master’s chain, but the human would not release his grip on her lead. By the time he turned around it was too late, I was leaping through the air and onto his pet.
I landed on my target and instantly felt a boot connect with my side, knocking me off balance and causing me to roll off. Snarling, I rose and swiped at him like a cat, knocking him to the ground. He was lucky his thick winter coat protected him from the worst of the blow, my claws slashing through the clothing but only lightly scratching the skin beneath.
The dog found new courage with the threat to her master and attacked, biting deep into my arm. With another roar, I threw her off and she landed awkwardly on the ground, whining in terror. Her lead snapped and her owner was voicing his own anger now, though his words were lost in the bloodlust, my senses focused entirely on my prey. With one mighty leap, I was ripping into her abdomen and tasting her organs with savage delight, while she twitched and whimpered, still alive but not for long.
I was so hungry, I devoured the carcass in less than a minute. The man had picked himself up but he made no move to stop me, too shocked to do anything it seemed. I rose from my meal and snarled at him, but the coming of dawn saved him from a similar fate.
I left him standing there with the broken lead in his hand, staring stupidly, and entered a nearby alley as the sun forced me to become human again, unaware I was casting a shadow for him to watch. Too late, I realised my error, just as the human regained control…
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Guilty
I panted and shivered in the cold, tasting the fresh blood in my mouth. And my hunger pangs had lessened. I’d killed again as I’d known I would.
There was barely time to process this information before the sound of voices hit me. Humans! Panic gripped me as I scanned my surroundings and saw I was in a narrow alley with a high wall at one end: trapped if I’d been mortal. I realised it was just one voice – a man standing near the entrance to the alley, either on the phone or talking to himself. A moment later he was peering into the shadows, eyes scanning for something. Did he know I was in here?
I shrank back against the wall, praying he hadn’t seen my face. More anger at the wolf boiled up. What mess had it got me into now?
“Hi, yes, I’d like to report an animal attack please.”
So he probably did know I was here. Fuck.
“Let’s just say I think it’s the man-eater that’s been running loose. It killed me dog and then went into an alley and I’ve not seen it come out. Please send someone, quick!”
And then nothing – silence, save for his rapid heartbeat and his wheezing. He seemed surprisingly calm for someone who’d just lost a beloved pet, but I supposed he might still be in shock, or perhaps the dog hadn’t been that close to his heart after all.
I looked back at the wall and knew I would have to climb it if I was going to escape, but only after I’d satisfied my curiosity. That had to be the police he’d been speaking to and I wondered what they would do when they heard the man’s description of me; whether one of the Slayers within the police force might come out to deal with it and give me a valuable insight into how they worked. Anything to help me survive, and through me, my family.
I hopped from one foot to the other while I waited, hoping it wouldn’t be long. My toes were already numb and the rest of me wouldn’t be far behind. It almost made me miss my fur. Almost.
A policewoman came to investigate. I was amazed at the speed she got to us, but I supposed a sighting of the man-eating rogue wolf would be a high priority.
“So tell us again what happened, sir,” she said.
“I was out walking me dog and we were just going down this street when she started acting pretty strange. She was, I dunno, uneasy, afraid of something. It was a struggle to keep hold of the lead – the pissin’ thing was slipping through me fingers. I couldn’t understand what had spooked her so damn much so I turned round too and this bloody great big wolf was coming towards us. At least, I thought it was a wolf. Anyway, the damned thing pounced and pinned her to the ground and that’s when I decided it was the beast that’s been attacking the town, killing all them people.
“Well I wasn’t just gonna stand there and let it eat me dog so I went to kick it. And then I realised it wasn’t a wolf. I didn’t know what the hell it was at that point. I mean, it was wolfish, but everything was happening too fast for me to get a close enough look.”
He went on to describe the attack and I could only be grateful the wolf had picked his dog and not him.
“It stripped her to the bone and turned to look at me. I stood holding her lead like a fucking idiot, too shocked by what had happened to do anything. Then the sun came up and it walked off into that alley,” he said, pointing. “And here’s where it gets weird. ’Cause I got a clear view of it, see. And I swear to God this is true. It was half man, half wolf!”
“Hang on, you’re saying you were attacked by a werewolf?” the policewoman asked, full of disbelief.
“Yes!” he insisted, and gave her a more detailed description. “I swear I’m not making this up. And it gets even weirder. I could
n’t see it after it went in there, but I could see its shadow and I watched it change shape, and this wasn’t no trick of the light. It went from being that thing to some regular guy! Maybe even a kid ’cause the shadow was pretty small for an adult, but it could just have been the way the sun was shining. Anyway, the alley is a dead end and I ain’t seen it come out.”
“Seriously, a werewolf?” Her disbelief had turned to irritation, and she seemed to be struggling to keep her personal feelings from interfering with her job. “What kind of sick joke is this? You told us you’d found the man-eater. Now if you’re done wasting police time, we could be out searching for the real killer.”
“The bastard son of a bitch killed me dog! Look, the remains are over there. Isn’t that enough evidence for you? And look at the footprints in the snow, and me coat! Can’t you see the claw marks?”
“Clearly something attacked you and your dog but I refuse to believe it was a werewolf, not even if you had some real proof. And the prints are already filling in with snow – it’s impossible to tell what they came from now. They look like regular animal prints to me, could be from a large dog. The loss of your pet is regrettable but I assure you we are doing everything we can to track down the animal, whatever it may turn out to be.” Her voice held no hint of emotion at that last statement, least of all sympathy for the dog.
“You could at least check the alley.”
With a sigh, she came into the shadows. I’d already climbed over the wall at this point, and I stood on the other side, still listening.
“There’s nothing here,” she called out. The guy swore under his breath.
The officer left after that, but I heard a man approach the dog owner. I hadn’t been the only one listening in on their conversation.
“Hey, mate, they may not have believed you, but I do. I’ve seen these things and what they can do. If you say it was a werewolf, I believe you. I’ve seen them take lives before too. You wouldn’t believe how many they can kill in a single night. But they’re not invincible; I’ve killed a few of these things myself. There aren’t many left now. In fact, I don’t know about any others except for this one – it might even be the last.”
I got the impression the dogwalker was eyeing this new man with suspicion.
“And how the fuck do you know so much about them?”
“I’m part of a group dedicated to destroying evil. I can offer you a place with us if you’re interested, and I can teach you more about these things. Together we can hunt it down and kill it if that’s what you want.”
The dogwalker seemed to think for a moment. “I dunno. I could quite happily carry on without having to face that bastard again. Hunting it doesn’t seem like the best of ideas.”
“It’s safer than being on your own, trust me. Werewolves aren’t dumb beasts like in some of the movies out there; the best of them can keep their human intelligence when they shift, even under the full moon. You’ve seen it and it’ll probably come for you next time to protect itself. It knows we’re hunting it, you see.”
The dogwalker probably paled. “For real? They’re intelligent enough to target someone like that?”
“Oh yes. So what do you say, will you come with me?”
There was a pause, and the dogwalker’s voice was heavy when he answered. “It doesn’t look like I have much of a fucking choice, does it?”
Back in the safety of my room, I looked at my bloodstained body, thinking how it was a good job it was a quiet Sunday morning. I really wanted to wash, but first I had to take care of the blood spatters from moving the corpse.
They were only specks, and the walls were dark blue which helped to make them less obvious. I had to run my hands over the paint to find all of them, each one dried into a hard crust which needed a good scrub to remove. A few of the stains refused to budge at all. Luckily I had no shortage of gothic posters to cover them up with, but that was only a short term fix – I was going to have to try and paint over them all later.
That done, I crept into the bathroom and into the shower, once again grateful of the warm water running over my body, washing away the crimson stains. The last I would ever physically see of Melissa White drained down the plughole, along with the remnants of the unnamed dog. But the horrific images rattling around my skull were not going anywhere, and I still felt dirty afterwards.
No sooner had I stepped out of the shower and dried myself than Mum burst through the door, her face panic stricken.
“Mel’s missing!”
Inwardly I cursed. They had to find out sometime, but I was hoping it wouldn’t be for a few more hours yet. I didn’t know if I was ready to face my family, especially Amy and the tears she would no doubt shed. Not that it really made any difference in the end. It was going to take a lot longer than a few hours to come to terms with what I’d done and to learn to live with it. If I could live with it.
I dressed and still felt no better for the clothes helping to make me look more human. My bed looked inviting, part of me wanting to climb up and hide under the blanket for the rest of the day. But that would only heighten people’s suspicions so I forced myself to go down to the lounge, where my family waited on the sofa.
Mum glanced at me as I traipsed in, worried and full of guilt. After all, she’d been responsible for Mel that night. How could she face the girl’s parents after what had happened?
Amy was in tears as I’d guessed she would be, probably fearing the worst. Only Dad looked his usual surly self, though surely the bastard felt something too.
“We’ve called the police already,” he said. “They’re sending someone straight over to investigate.”
Nodding, I sat with them and felt my own guilt grow even heavier. I’d brought this on them. How could I be the rock Mum and Amy needed when my core was in pieces? My outer shell was also crumbling and keeping up any pretence at strength was looking impossible. Especially when it came to Mel’s parents. I didn’t want to think about having to face them, knowing our grief would be a mere shadow of what they were going through.
Facing the police was equally as unappealing. I didn’t know if I could keep it together long enough to give them a convincing alibi, yet I had to for my family’s sake. Mum and Amy were already suffering enough because of me. Discovering my dark secret would probably finish them, and I wouldn’t let that happen.
My arm snaked around my sister’s shaking shoulders. I knew the part they expected me to play, but the protection and comfort I had to offer was false, and it only left me feeling more nauseous.
It wasn’t long before the police came and went. They questioned us and looked for any signs Mel had simply run away of her own free will, but her parents had already confirmed it was out of character. There’d been no food taken from our fridge or money stolen from my parents either, plus all her belongings were still lying where she’d left them in Amy’s room. Once that was ruled out, they searched the place for evidence of foul play, and found none. Either I’d done a better job at cleaning up after the wolf than I’d thought, or their search wasn’t particularly thorough at this stage. They did take fingerprints though. And as soon as they matched them, they’d know no one else had been in the house except for the five of us, and then they’d be back to question us some more.
We’d all given them an alibi, though I wasn’t sure they’d believed mine. Was I being paranoid? Or did I see a flicker of suspicion in the police officer’s eyes? Either way, it was too late to do anything more to hide my guilt.
A search party was sent out but they also found nothing, even with the help of dogs. It was easy to imagine my scent driving the animals wild with panic, and so the grave went undiscovered.
Somehow we got through the next few days. Guilt hung over the household, subduing us all. It even got to Dad in the end, manifesting in that terrible temper of his, while Amy remained tearful, often breaking down without warning. God knows what they thought had happened. No struggle, no break in, so Mel couldn’t have been kidnapped. Maybe the
y’d decided she must have run away after all but then, why would she leave all her belongings?
The police were just as puzzled. The search was becoming more desperate, Mel’s prospects growing bleaker by the day. If she had been kidnapped time was running out, but if she had somehow ended up out on the streets, alone and at the mercy of the elements and ‘the rogue wolf’, I think the police knew she was dead already. And the worst was yet to come.
Mel’s parents made an appeal some time after she had first been declared missing, broadcast on the local news one night. I could only watch in horror as they held each other, pleading through their tears for anyone who might know something to come forward. My stomach heaved at the sight and I wanted to run upstairs, but I couldn’t seem to tear my eyes from the screen. The sound of Amy venturing down from her room saved me, Dad changing the channel before she could see it and burst into fresh tears.
At least my family could find some brief respite when they went to bed. My nights remained sleepless and tormented. The appeal only made me fight harder against the tiredness and the waiting nightmares, and I’d even taken to cutting myself when I had to. Amy had her teddy bears and beanie babies to cuddle up with for comfort. I had my swiss army knife.
How long had it been since I’d had a proper night’s sleep? Too long. My eyelids were drooping for what seemed the hundredth time. I gripped the little knife and sliced into my forearm, the pain as sharp as the blade that caused it. My eyelids snapped open. Something happened at a cellular level as I called on the transformation, causing the wound to knit together without the need to bring on any noticeable changes. My eyelids started to droop again. So tired. I just wanted to give into it, just once. Eyes closed, it felt good. No! The knife came up once more, too late. My arm fell back over the side of the bed, the blade slipping from my fingers. And sleep washed over me.