by Taj McCoy El
“Jeeshies Bonkers. Why do you have to keep doing that?” Mo held his heart and took a deep breath.
“Peepers and plates mate. Peepers and plates.”
“Alright, fine. But why only me?”
“Well, the box can tell when we’re about so it’s no use sneaking up on it. Also, there is a definite lack of facial expressions to make it a good toime. And Mephi? We scared him a few toimes, Gorblimey oi’m still regrowing moy nose hairs. Now everyone feels that’s not quoite a great oidear, if youse catch moy drift.” He fanned a hand in front of his nose.
“Now let’s get out of this muck and moire and find some clean water.”
“No complaints on that.” Mo clapped him on the back and Bonkers' hand jerked toward his knife but before it could reach it froze clenching into a strained fist.
“See, oi told’ya this was easy.”
Mo nodded in congratulations. “Good Job Bonkers'. These men have chosen a strong leader.”
Quickly turning to hide the blush that was creeping up his neck Bonkers looked off into the distance and burst out in a sob. he hastily wiped his nose clean with his sleeve and stared away from Mo.
“Bonkers?”
“Is’nuffin.” A loud sniff was the only punctuation.
“O-okay, then. I’m headed back.
Bonkers waved him off. “Oi’ll catch you up.”
Mo turned and gave the leader of the knockers his space.
Leadership always weighs heavy. And In the last few days we’ve opened doors they thought long lost. I might leak in a situation like that myself. He imagined the barest glimmer of hope getting into their lives and taking root.
And now it’s blossoming.
He walked back to the dry side of the creek and saw Mephi washing his fur thoroughly.
“What’s up, Meph?”
This mud is so fine it’s gotten into my undercoat. Makes it hard to get all the little pieces out. It’s like sand in your underwear.”
“Ouch.”
“Yeah! So, where’s trashbot?”
"I don’t…” Mo looked around for Ziggs and didn’t see them.
"I don’t know either.”
They both sprang to their feet.
“Shaz, more mud.” Mephi groaned.
“Let’s go.” Mo dashed calling for his compatriot off to where the last place he had seen them. When they arrived, there was nothing to see except muddy marsh stirred up by the battle.
“Ziggs!!!” He yelled.
“Ziggs!!!” Mephi echoed from right over his shoulder.
“Minimap says they’re right here.”
Mo went to stand of bamboo-like reeds and cut a few sturdy ones and threw one to Mephi.
“Probe the ground.”
They stabbed the ground with the thick reeds and found a hard spot about the size of Ziggs and started digging. Mo found a corner and banged on it and yelled.
Ziggs: what?
“How come you didn’t tell us you were stuck?”
Ziggs: Because I was ashamed.
Ziggs: I wanted to fix it myself. But then I couldn’t.
“What’s that got to do with anything?”
Ziggs: you guys are so good and I made you mad earlier and you keep calling me trashbot.
“Well, what else are we supposed to call you, brick?”
“Knock it off Meph. Ziggs sounds stuck in a rut, no pun intended.” He motioned to Ziggs’ prone and muddy form. “Let’s try to figure this out.”
He turned back to the downed bot. “So, what’s going on, Ziggs? And why can’t you talk?”
Ziggs: I can talk.
Ziggs: I just don’t want to.
“So, we should leave you here?” Mo Barked angrily.
“That’s my vote,” Mephi added frankly.
Mo shot Mephi a look that warned of imminent physical danger.
“What? You’re the one that said Darwin always takes his cut.”
Mo could only growl and bit off his retort.
“Ziggs we're gonna get you dug out will that help?”
Ziggs: Yes
“Okay, Hold on.”
“When you say we’re gonna dig, you didn’t mean me, did ya?”
The look on Mo's face made Mephi chuckle. But then a stench wafted across Mo's nose and changed that look in short order.
“Gods that is rancid!” Mo popped his mask into places and took a deep breath.
“Leveled it up. Now, I’m ready to dig—and willing.”
They finally freed Ziggs from the mud. It would seem to anyone else that they had used the mud to cover themselves. At Ziggs’ request, they pushed them into some fresh-ish water. They brushed most of the grime from Ziggs' surface. And lay it back on a stand of reeds.
Ziggs: Okay look away and I can fix the rest.
“Why can’t we look?”
“Yeah, trashbot. Are yer insides made of meat slushie?”
Ziggs: You’ll go blind
“Blind?”
“Ziggs he already is. Let’s get this show on the road. Chickens are waiting.”
Mephi and Mo turned their backs to Ziggs and waited. There was the sound of seals being broken and pressures equalizing. A cloud of vapor rolled across the surface of the water by their thighs.
“So, Ziggs you never told Booms what was wrong with us. I think now is the perfect time.”
There was no response just the sound of metal pinging and banging.
“So, you’re gonna play the silent type. I might just have to turn around.” Mephi threatened to turn around.
Ziggs: No! Don’t.
“Fine, fine…” Mephi began rubbing his stomach and making a deep mmm sounds. “Man, breakfast really did a job on my stomach this morning.”
“What are you talking about now?” Mo asked.
“Do you smell popcorn?”
With an involuntary sniff, Mo learned the meaning of the word vile. His salivary glands ran, and his stomach turned. He leaned over and heaved—nothing.
“Dead bodies in warm moist places!!!” a tiny voice heaved in revulsion. “Is that what you normally smell like?” a small voice raged from behind them.
Mephi just chuckled while Mo turned to see where the voice had come from. Standing on top of Ziggs was literally a pixie dressed as a tinker. A leather apron and tool belt hung from the decidedly feminine frame. Pink hair stood out in a shock from her goggles that were being used as a headband. A cute nose with amber freckles lay on pearly skin that was glowing slightly through smudges of oil and dirt. Her bare glowing arms were toned and stood out against the dirty shirt and pants she was wearing.
“Heya…” She waved with her gloved hands. “beep-boop?” She then looked at her feet shyly.
“Ziggs?” Mo squatted down next to the robot and peered at the fairy-like figure.
“Yah.” Her voice sounded like a three-year-old on helium and tinkling bells.
“So, this is what’s been going on?”
“Yah.” she said shyly, grinding her toe into the metal surface.
"I don’t get it,” Mo said flustered.
“Told you he was blind.” Mephi just shook his head. “Let me break it down for ya, Booms. Ziggs didn’t want you to know that she’s a girl because she’s afraid you might not want to play with her.”
“Is that a thing?”
“Sometimes,” Ziggs responded. “Guys can be pretty rough on girls sometimes. In playgrounds, they pull ponytails. In video games, well, they do worse.”
“Point taken. But what made you think I would be like that?”
“Well, after I trolled you guys so hard in the beginning, I couldn’t stop. I was all, ‘lookit me I’m one of the guys.’ but I felt really bad when I realized you guys weren’t just playing for fun. And then Mephi figured it out and held it over my head and I didn’t know how much you guys communicate. What if he knew that you didn’t like playing with girls? But I liked playing with you and didn’t want to stop. So, I just kept beeping and booping, afraid to tell th
e truth and let you know. And now here we are.”
“That’s stupid.”
Ziggs turned indignant her wings flaring out and buzzing “Why?” she said crossly.
“No, not the touchy-feely stuff you said.” Mo tried to fan any icky feelings away. “The fact that people don’t want to game with girls. Stupid.”
“Yeah, that is stupid.” she stared up at Mo. Mo stared back until he realized he was staring back, and then quickly turned to stare at anything else.
When the heat started rising in his face he quickly asked, “So… uh… are you going to fix this so we can get out of the water?”
“Oh yeah. Gimme one second.” She flew to the underside of her bot and pulled out a wrench. She quickly undid two nuts and a circular plate slid away revealing a pipe. Next to it, she opened a hatch and pulled out a hose that she could’ve crawled through if she’d wanted to. It unfurled, and she struggled handed it to mo.
“Put this in the water and don’t dip it into the sediment. ‘Kay?”
“Sure.” Mo held it in the water as she flew up to what Mo had always considered Ziggs’ eye. She placed her hand on it and it hissed and separated into plates as it folded outward forming a cockpit in a blossom of metal. She climbed in and hollered.
“Let me know when the water runs clear.”
You got it.”
Ziggs’ bot body sucked up the water. Soon, thick, brown splats of mud were being ejected out of its tailpipe with the sound of too many tacos in an echoey bathroom. And then a steady stream of brown water erupted and ran until it came through mostly the same color as the marsh water.
“You’re good Ziggs.” Mo said over the sound of the pumps.
“Pull the pipe out of the water, yah?
“Done.”
The sound of the pumps ceased and water began draining out of the tailpipe and pooling in the hose that Mo was hanging at waist height.” Ziggs flew back out and saw the hose in Mo's hands.
“You can drop that now,” she said absentmindedly while she activated a switch that slowly reeled in the hose. Mo did as asked with a splash. She slammed the hatch over the hose shut and fastened the cover back on once the drainage stopped.
“Time to start this baby up.”
She climbed into the cockpit and threw a few switches. Her bot shuddered with loud clankings and screeches of metal on metal like an old diesel engine being brought back to life.
“C’mon baby. Momma loves ya!!!”
The bot sputtered and the screeching turned into a whine that made Mephi and Mo cover their ears. It rose in pitch and went from audible into higher frequencies. Mo let his ears go but Mephi was still holding them.
“Harmonics lock in 3-2-1…” Mo heard Ziggs yell.
Lights began coruscating through Ziggs’ circuits as it shook and vibrated. The box righted itself and stood floating with Ziggs in her cockpit like a cuckoo perched on a clock.
“So, wait if you’re Ziggs then what is this?”
“This beautiful piece of machinery is my pixie-frame.”
“That’s not a pixie frame?” Mephi joined in.
“Not yet but that is just a technicality. As soon as I get more build points it’s on.”
“So, you’re gonna take this and turn it into a mecha?”
“That’s my plan. So, you better be nice to me.”
“Yes, ma’am!” Mo saluted with a giggle.
Like seriously, who doesn’t want a mecha on their side.
“What do you call that hunk of junk?”
“That hunk of junk is my baby, and if you insult it, I will be forced to destroy you down to a molecular level with extreme prejudice.”
Mephi just leaned in and said, “Smell something?”
Ziggs squeaked and rapidly pushed buttons while holding her breath. Her cockpit slid in and the mechanical voice said, “No! I smell nothing!!!”
Mo just shook his head.
“So, Ziggs, what do you call this pixie frame?
“This is my Gunny Num Nums.”
“Gummy what what??”
“Its name is Gun-num-num”
“Gun-num-num?”
“Exactly! He’s my precious widdle gunny-num-nums.” a mix of colors spread through the circuitry. “That’s right you’re a good boy, yes you are!!!”
“So, wait. It can understand you?” Mo inquired.
"I sure hope so. I raised it that way. It gives him a little more autonomy and he’s such a good boy.”
The happy colors flashed through again.
“So, you’re saying that you’re piloting a living mecha.”
“That’s close enough to the truth for now. But we should get going, don’tcha think.”
“Right kiddies back to the quest.” Mephi clapped his hands bringing them back to reality.
“Chickens.” Mo groaned.
“beep-boop and all of that.”
They slogged back to the far bank and found Davemarth waiting for them.
“Bonkers said they’re moving ahead and to catch up?” He spit into the water and stared off into the distance.
“Great we went from leaders to laggers in no time flat,” Mephi complained and tried to submerge himself fully.
“Your leadership was okay, but Bonkers is better at it,” Davemarth said flatly.
“You don’t bother with tact at all do you?”
“Does that have something to do with your thin skin?” Davemarth’s hand went his dagger.
Mo thought about it for a second because Davemarth could probably hurt him and probably didn’t realize his hand was on his knife. He came up with the only answer to deescalate the situation.
“Probably.” He turned to his team and called out, “Let’s get rid of this mud and move out.”
✽✽✽
After watching Grax almost kill himself with the whip and the subsequent laughter Margaret got her chance to embarrass herself. Mayah was more helpful with her instruction as she hadn’t instructed Grax at all. First of all, because it was funnier that way. Second of all, because he didn’t ask and Mayah thought he would learn quicker if she just let him, do what he do.
They found out that Margaret used to do rhythmic gymnastics floor routines with the ribbon and picked it up extremely quick. Especially compared to Grax who was engraving stilettos with a disgruntled look rising every time he saw Margaret fluidly flailing the whip around. Mayah was watching in-between making Club Lights by the dozens.
They are lights and weesp beaters. Best of both worlds.
She carved some trough-shaped pieces of wood with the delivery parcel runes as well and wedged the crystals into the notch. The idea was giving the crystals some heft so that they were thrown easier.
It’s hard to get any range with a crumpled piece of paper.
It was nearing two o’clock, and they were about to dive into Shadow’s Sheer Shine City.
“Hey, guys should we wait outside of the gates and test weapons or just go for it?”
"I vote test. If we rush it and bungle the whole thing I’ll be pissed,” Grax growled.
“What about you, Mags?”
“Discretion is the better part of valor, or so I’m told.”
“Well, that’s a unanimous vote for waiting outside of the gate and fighting our way in. If our new toys work, we should be good to go. We will, however, need to retrieve arrows and stilettos if we can. We didn’t produce as much as I’d like. But I hope it’ll get us through.”
She handed about ten club lights to each of them along with some Light (W) grenades
“The club lights will work as weapons in close quarters so keep them handy.” Mayah passed the lights out. “Margaret you should keep the whip and I’ll use the torch enchantment on happiness for our first round and make any adjustments from there.
“Grax how do you want to go?”
"I was thinking since my swords probably won’t be much good how about I make a few club lights with stilettos on the end like dual short spears?”
> “We have the time to do that.” Mayah nodded.
“Will these count as my gift?”
“Do you want them to?”
“No.”
“Then stop asking.”
Margaret looked back and forth between Mayah and Grax as they had another one of their staring matches. Mayah broke eye contact first.
Now let’s get these last-minute preparations done. Grax you craft them, and I’ll enchant them. Try and make a few of them so that we can have a couple. I’ve got one last thing I want to try. I’m surprised I haven’t tried it sooner.”
“Tried what, dear?”
“That sounds like something is gonna blow up. I’m going to sit over there.” Grax motioned off into the distance. The rötten followed him.
“Traitors.” Mayah pouted a bit.
The rötten chittered and disappeared into the grass.
“It’s not gonna explode but now I won’t make one for you. Margaret, can I get 4 of your arrows?”
“Sure.”
Mayah gave her crew one last look and said “Okay engrave’em if you’ve got’em. We leave at a quarter after three.”
✽✽✽
Malcipher strode towards the walls of Drahtspule enjoying the scenery that he would most likely be called on to destroy one day. Beside him walked Halsh. The man was unnaturally quiet. His footsteps didn’t make a noise, neither did his clothing in the warm breeze that rustled them. He was so quiet that Malcipher was startled when Halsh spoke.
“Lieutenant, I don’t mean to dig into things that aren’t my business, but could you clue me into what we’re doing here so I don’t kill the wrong people?”
“Is that your only concern? That you may kill potential allies?”
Halsh stuttered a step but kept quiet.
“Well, I guess that would be an unfavorable turn of events. We are here to meet up with an ally, and then proceed to destroy the shamans and their nature magic. So, unless someone truly threatens us, then keep your blades sheathed. We need to move without suspicion. Drawing the attention of the city guard would be…” Malcipher paused looking for the right word, “Suboptimal.”