by Taj McCoy El
“They have a specialized class that lets them carry staggering amounts of weight. They’ll never be fast or be worth much in a fight but they’re worth more than their weight in gold. Quite literally.” she smiled at Malcipher bashfully. He had finally noticed that her teeth were pointed, and it made him feel like a piece of meat.
“They can carry as much as their muscles and bags of holding will allow. It’s the only class that lets you carry more than one bag. And even then, their bags have to be specially made. one to accept their magic that allows the crates to go into the bag. Two to bear the weight of what goes into them. Wizards have tried to replicate the feat for other classes and failed miserably. Not only that, the only way to retrieve something that big out of their bag is to use that same magic that got it into it in the first place. One of those bags would take a crane to lift when fully loaded.
“Taking them on carts or across suspension bridges is an issue though.” A small frown crossed her face. She stroked his arm, and the smile returned to her face.
“So, why’d you bring me here?” Malcipher was beginning to feel a bit wary, anxious, and also a bit irritated.
“It’s just around the corner. Let me show you my masterpiece.”
They walked in between another row of crates and turned a corner into a space about thirty feet wide that was empty of everything except for waist high pillars with levers on top of them and a row of cages containing humans. He wondered what the pillars were for.
As they got closer there was a circle with intricate runes and geometric shapes inside. The lines seemed to pulse with power. The power reminded him of High Alchemist Caltura’s lab.
“Beautiful, isn’t it?” She hugged his arm tightly as she positively bubbled over with enthusiasm.
“What is it?” he asked becoming even more wary.
“Let me show you. Harry, are you here?” she yelled into the darkness. A slim hooded figure slid into the light from a shadow and drifted over to them. His face was hidden by the shadow of his hood and flies buzzed around him. As he came closer Malcipher could smell the scent of sulfur waft off the man.
"I am not Harry. I am the Heretic, and it would do you good to remember that, Zhi'Zhu.”
Zhi'Zhu looked bored and rolled her eyes. “Anyway, Harry could you show our guest what this does?”
Harry or The Heretic sighed loud and deep, hinting this battle wasn’t one he was going to win. He grumbled as he walked away snapping his fingers in different directions. As he did figures appeared and began bustling about. Four of them stood at the pillars and began infusing then with glowing light. As their light dimmed, they were replaced with another who kept the glow going. By the time the third person had rotated out the sigils and runes on the floor were glowing brightly.
Two of the hooded figures pulled a man out of the cage. And dragged him screaming to the circle. They threw him past the glowing border and the man fell flat on his face.
“This man came looking for a friend of his who is now part of our cadre. Now he is about to find out what happened to his friend Hendricks who is a loyal and hardworking member of our den.”
The man continued to scream as the men at the pillars pulled one lever after the other. He was dragged to the center of the circle by forces unseen and lifted first to his toes, and then into the air struggling wildly. Arcs of bluish white light arced across the floor, the arcs getting higher with each spark of energy until they touched the man’s feet.
In a flash, like a circuit grounding, the energy began coruscating over the man’s body. He spasmed rigidly being held in place. Then he screamed.
The scream went on longer than any person should be able to scream for, rising in pitch and intensity until his eyes burst open and arcs of red energy shot to each pillar.
The men in control of the pillars pulled and raised more levers and the blue energy subsided. As it did the man blinked, and the flow of red energy stemmed. With one last final whimper he was dropped to the floor and all the energies disappeared.
“What did you do to him?” Malcipher asked only because it reminded him of what Caltura had done to him.
“We just wiped his mind of free will!” She jumped up and down on his arm excitedly.
Malcipher could only look on in shock as the hooded figures grabbed the man under his shoulders and dragged him towards where they stood. The man’s head lolled back and forth as they adjusted their grip on him. They stopped right in front of Zhi'Zhu.
She reached out and grabbed the near unconscious man’s face and lifted it. The eyes were pointed in two different directions and spun lazily. Zhizhu snapped her fingers in front of the man’s face and said, “Focus!”
The man’s eyes slowly began tracking together, and he focused on Zhi'Zhu.
“You will be loyal to me. Do you understand?”
The man nodded weakly.
“These men are my workers. Do as they say until I give you new orders.”
The man nodded weakly once again. The hooded figures dragged the man away his feet bounced on the stone floor surely scratching and bloodying them. He had no reaction to the pain whatsoever.
“Isn’t that brilliant?” She leaned heavily on Malcipher. She looked up biting her lip and staring into his eyes.
Malcipher was a bit torn since he understood that part of the process to make him so obedient was here in this room. It could be a key to his release. To him finding the key.
His body tensed, and he clenched his teeth in that rictus smile trying not to let the pain show. As the pain subsided, he said, “yes brilliant.”
✽✽✽
Mo woke to the pinging of notifications and someone pouring a buttload of peach flavored gorilla diarrhea down his throat. He struggled to fight back but hands held him steady. Hands held one wrist down but as he moved his other hand to his face all he saw was a charred stump just below his shoulder.
He stared at it in disbelief. That was until Treegan grabbed his shoulder and pushed it back down. The pain flared, and he screamed.
“Sorry Booms.” The sonorous words carried through the pain.
Someone smacked him, and he used the rage to focus on them
“Booms,” Bonkers yelled. “Stop ya struggling. We’re trying to put your arm back on!!!”
“What?” Mo grunted through the pain and rage.
“Just bear the pain boy-o you’ll be right as rain in a few minutes.”
Now what Mo thought was pain was just a prelude to what happened next. He floated in and out of consciousness. As he saw knives cut into his stump causing excruciating pain. At one point he saw someone cutting the burnt skin off his dismembered arm and pouring more of the foul-smelling potion on it.
Then they laid the arm next to the stump and Bonkers said, “This is gonna ‘urt!”
“More than—”
Mo had intended to say, “the cutting,” but the flash of pain that accompanied the slamming of the limb and stump back together made the cutting seem like a pale flash in the pan. Pins and needles the size of mac trucks drove themselves into the base of his skull, and they traveled down his arm and into his hand.
He only realized he was screaming when they poured something flavored with vanilla, wet dog hair, and rancid cheese into his mouth and forced him to swallow. He coughed and sputtered until someone held his nose and finished pouring it down.
His arm was on fire. It felt like ants made of magma were crawling over, around and through his bicep. He wanted to pull his arm in and cradle it against his body. But strong hands held him in place.
“Stop foighting ya fool twit or yer arm’ll be twisted round wrong.”
Mo forced himself to relax as the worst of the pain began subsiding.
“What is going on?” Mo huffed trying to catch his breath.
“Chook ate yer arm, ‘e did.” Bonkers wiped sweat off his forehead with one hand. The other held Mo’s arm firmly in place.
“Chook?
“That blasted rooster. Nipped it roi
ght off. Had to put it back on before the arm went totally dead or ye’d be a lefty for sure.”
“You could have let me die.”
“Oi’d never let one of me own pass on if oi had a choice in the matter.”
“Bonkers, I’m glad you think of me as one of your own, but I’m a paladin. Remember?
Bonkers opened his mouth and for once nothing came out. Small chuckles could be heard round the clearing. And Mo being through the worst of the pain chuckled as well.
“But seriously, next time let me die. That hurt way too much.”
“Oi’ve ‘ad both legs reattached so oi know what you mean.” He scratched his head.
“I’ll never forget you saving my life though.”
Treegan helped him sit up and bound his arm to his side in a sling. He looked into Mo’s eyes. “Let it stay there for a couple of hours. There’s a chance it still might fall off if you move it too much.”
“Thanks, Treegan.” Mo looked down at his arm and saw the burnt fabric of his clothes and still healing skin. He was covered in foul smelling liquids and rankled at the offensive odors. He swiveled his head around to where knockers were trying to figure out how to carry the humongous chicken.
“So, what happened? Did we win?”
“Sure enough, lad. Whoile you fed that monstrosity your arm, me an’ Treegan gave it a pounding. Then we found you… and then your arm.”
Mo couldn’t help but laugh. “What about the other rooster that Ziggs and Davemarth were fighting?”
As soon as Ziggs but markers on the thing Davemarth and the boys made it pay the proice.”
Mo sighed. “Good. So, the only thing left to do is turn in the chickens?”
“Looks like.”
Mo got himself up to a standing position with an assist from Treegan, looked over at all the knockers and yelled, “ARE YOU MEN?”
A few rallied with “YES!!!”
“ARE YOU BROTHERS?” he yelled louder this time.
All of them responded with raised fists and a yell of, “YES!!!”
“ARE YOU KNOCKERS?”
YES!!!
“THEN HURRY AND GET THAT CHICKEN TRUSSED AND BUSSED!!!”
Everyone in the clearing laughed raucously and patted each other on the back. Smiles went all around.
Bonkers was staring at Mo, a giant smile on his face and a few tears running down his cheeks. He nodded at mo. The nod held more than gratitude. He nodded the way men do when they’ve been victorious against insurmountable odds. and through blood and sweat, form a bond that is nigh unbreakable.
Mo smiled content and happy and nodded back.
Suddenly he was lifted onto Treegan’s shoulder and everyone gave a cheer. Treegan held him until it was time to carry the chicken back to the farm. Kwaad worked on the chicken and was satisfied to see that it would survive to see another day. With his approval they hoisted the chicken and made their way through the trees.
Ziggs floated over as they passed the torn-up earth from her battle with the cyclone chicken. Gun-num-nums was covered with dust and small dings but Ziggs sat with her cockpit open and her arms behind her head.
“How was your battle?” Mo asked.
“It was a breeeeeze.” she waggled her eyebrows.
Mo groaned.
“If you want to hear a really good pun ask me how my battle went.”
“I’m game. How was your battle, Booms?”
“It was disarming.”
“That’s horrible and not even a pun.”
“Read my damage notifications.” He suggested.
He watched her scroll through all the notifications, she stopped suddenly, and turned to stare at him.
Eyes wide she drawled, “Nooooooooo…..”
“Yup.” Mo smiled and looked ahead.
“Ouch!”
“Double, NO, make that quadruple ouch.”
“Wow!” she gave him a look of admiration.
“Funny thing is I barely remember that part. What I DO remember is them reattaching it.”
Ziggs’ face twisted in confusion and disbelief as she glanced at his face, and then his sling.
“They had to cut the burned skin away from the arm and my stump, and then they slammed them together and poured healing potion over it. And then they made me drink healing potions.” Mo shuddered at the memory. “But all in all, I have two hands again and I told Bonkers to let me die next time. It would be less painful than having to go through that again.”
“That bad, huh?”
“Sooooo bad.”
Knockers from the farm swarmed them and helped carry the chickens to the yard. Their procession was moving much faster when Mephi ran out to them.
“So, how’s the arm?”
“Attached again.”
“Ouch.”
“Yeah. So, you guys ready to turn in the quest?”
“Our first ever quest completion? I wonder what we’ll get?” Ziggs contemplated.
Mo turned to the skunk man. “So, Mephi after this do you want to hang around and meet my sister or go finish your quest. You can always come back if you want to.”
“I’ll wait. I just didn’t want to hang out with two good’fer nothing couch jockeys who would chafe my style day in and day out.” He laughed and Ziggs stuck her tongue out at the beastman. "I don’t know what the quest reward will be, but I feel that it’s already worth it.”
“Samesies.” Ziggs squealed.
"I already got what I wanted out of you guys, so I’ll be happy with whatever rewards we get.” Mo walked out ahead of them.
“And what did you want out of us,” Mephi asked skeptically
Mo stopped and turned around to face them bringing them both up short.
“A team.” Mo’s face was serious even though it was smiling.
“Booooooooo,” Ziggs yelled and scooted around him in a whirl of humming color.
“Yeah that was really corny.” Mephi put a hand on Mo’s shoulder and walked around his other side.
Mo fumed. “You guys SUUUUCK!!!!!”
Mephi and Ziggs heard him scream and just started laughed loudly. Mephi said in a loud voice, “He falls for it every time.”
"I know right…” He heard Ziggs through her speakers.
They both stopped and looked at him.
“Well, are you coming or what oh great armless leader?”
“Harmless without the H,” Ziggs snickered.
“Well, if I don’t, you guys will just fight each other so I guess you guys need me.”
“Need, he says.” Mephi’s face scowled indignantly.
“beep- boop- Nope!” Ziggs pivoted and floated away with Mephi walking next to her.
“Hey, wait up. I’m injured!” He raced after them.
They walked into the farmyard teasing each other, the birds laid out and knockers working on enclosures big enough to hold the last birds even though it was the middle of the night. They walked up to Driskel who stood with a smile on his face for once. He was flanked by Kwaad and his wife Engele who was also smiling for the first time Mo could remember.
Well, Booms, you sure have made an impression on me.” He spoke loud enough for all present to hear.” Not only you, but your whole team. I see now that sometimes a man needs to be given a chance and you found a way to let these men rise from their desperate situations on their own merits.
“Because of your labors I stand to make a tidy sum of money showing these chickens off to the world and that wouldn’t have been possible without the help of everyone here. So, I would like to raise the rewards I was to give you. You lot have more than earned it!”
Everyone in attendance cheered. And then Driskel continued.
“For each man instead of 3 gold, you will now receive 5 gold.”
The knockers exclaimed loudly. Someone in the back yelled, “Winner, winner, chicken dinner!” much to the delight of everyone present. It quieted down and Driskel continued.
“Instead of the 250 experience points I’m raising
it 700 experience points!!!”
More hoots and hollers were heard through the crowd as some the knockers leveled including Mo, Mephi, and Ziggs.
DING!!!
“Now we come to the biggest rewards of them all. Firstly, your reputation. Gents when I first met you, I thought, what bunch of devilishly ill-shorn villainous brigands and plunderers has this paladin brought to darken my doorstep? I honestly feared my life and the life of my family. But after you made an oath to the gods of Majesta I realized that you might just need a nudge in the right direction or just a chance to prove yourselves. And prove yourselves you did, and in spades.
"I wrote a letter to my brother earlier, and though the documents aren’t here yet. I am able to grant you, by the power of the High Council of Science and Peer Assemblage of Drahtspule a reputation reward, raising all your reputations to neutral.”
As the words left his mouth, a glow fell over the knockers and their appearances became a little less shabby. Their glares a little less dastardly and their posture a bit straighter. A hush fell over the knockers which only a few gasps escaped.
“This reputation comes with the warning that any old crimes being held against you are not being forgiven or absolved, but that the science council will help you to make amends if you turn yourselves in. This reputation was given in the hopes that you receive a fair chance at life and the hopes that you will better yourselves in the future.”
“Now, in the hopes of that happening, I would like your help. Or I should say, the knockers help in building a business for these chickens. Without your sweat equity, I would have nothing to show for it except busted chicken coops and an empty farmyard. So how would the knockers like ten percent of my profits and stake in the company?”
“It would mean hard work. And we have no idea what to expect from these birds but with your help I’m sure we can figure something out.”
We’d ‘ave to make our gang—ahem our team a bit more official to make that happen, but yer not afraid of some ’ard work are ya, boys?”
The knockers cheered loudly and tossed caps into the air.
“In that case, oi think you’ve got yourself a deal.” Bonkers and Driskel shook hands, and a glow washed over them as the deal was struck.