A feeling of loss washes through me as, one by one, his connections to my body leave me. My fists tighten in his tunic as he attempts to take a step back, my eyes still closed, willing him not to leave. “Please, don’t,” I plead with him.
Baler’s hands softly trail up my arms, coming to rest on my cheeks again. “Grace, look at me, please.” Slowly I comply, opening my eyes to meet his greenish-grey ones. Concern and understanding swirl behind his eyes.
“Grace, I’m not going anywhere, I promise you that. I know it’s hard to believe but I have known I was yours since the moment I met you. You were writhing on the ground having just arrived here. When I covered you with a blanket and laid my hands on you, I felt this pull to you, immediately. Then when you settled back into my legs, it hit me like lightning. I knew you were it. You were the one I had waited for, first in life and then in death. In my 1,082 years of life, I have never felt for another the way I feel for you.”
Brushing his lips along mine, he sealed that statement with a kiss. It wasn’t the rushed, hungry kiss like before. It was soft and gentle. One meant to transfer the meaning of his words and cement them into my soul.
My fingers slowly untangle from Baler’s tunic, and my hands glide up his back and hook over his shoulders. I cling to him like a baby koala, just holding him while I take everything he’s offering. When he pulls back this time, I don’t feel the loss as keenly as before.
He offers me one more quick kiss and smiles before he steps back. “Okay, Grace. It’s time to get you ready. Put on your dress and remember, no metal.”
He turns to walk out, but I stop him with a hand on his arm. “Stay. Please. I… I just.” I take a deep breath and pull my jumbled thoughts together before trying to convey to him my fears. “I’m scared. I’m scared that I’ll lose the tiny connection I found to my wolf. More than that, I’m scared this is a dream. That this, between us, isn’t real. I don’t want to be away from you.” The last line is delivered in a whisper as my eyes meet the floor.
Baler turns to face me, but I can’t meet his eyes. I’m flooded with embarrassment and maybe even a bit of shame at my weakness. But he just places a finger under my chin, lifting it until my eyes meet his. His face is stern and brokers no argument. “I will tell you this one more time, Grace, and only one more time. So, listen and hear me. You have nothing to fear with me. I. Am. Not. Going. Anywhere.” Each word is clipped and spoken with clear understanding. There is no mistaking what he says. He means the words coming from his lips. He’s not going to leave, this isn’t a dream. He’s real, he’s here, and he’s mine.
“Now. I am going to stand here and face the entrance. You are going to go get changed. When you are ready, we will exit together. Understood?” I don’t speak but rather nod my head in agreement. He places a gentle kiss on my forehead and releases my chin. “Good. Now go get ready. You know the Gods do not like to be kept waiting.”
When he turns around, I take in the sight of broad shoulders, a strong lean back, tapering down to a tight ass hidden inside his deep brown leather breeches. Damn. How had I not checked that out before? He has an exceptionally fine ass. Shaking myself out of my appreciative trance, I turn and quickly undress. I slip into the silk dress which cascades down my body in a single flowing garment. The bodice crosses across the front and flows over my shoulders, hanging down my back in waves. A simple tie at the waist pulls it tight showing off my hourglass figure. I take a little time to admire myself in the reflective glow of the water. I’ve never been one for dresses, but this makes me feel almost shy.
“Wow.” I spin quickly to find Baler looking at me with hunger building in his eyes. “You look amazing, Grace.”
“Thank you,” I whisper back.
“I almost do not want to take you out there, but rather keep you here to myself. Alas, you need to go. Come on.” He takes my hand and together, just as he said, we exit the bathing room.
My heart is hammering in my chest. My nerves getting the better of me. Baler squeezes my hand, a reassuring presence at my side. I look up at the sharp angle of his jaw, his straight posture, and strong shoulders. I know with him at my side, I can do this. I have to do this. I have to get her back.
I want to mate this man and find my other mates, Killian, and the twins. I can’t believe I never recognized the pull for what it was. That they never felt it. I met Killian for the first time years ago, he had to be about twenty years old at the time. Why didn’t his wolf recognize me as his mate then? Nor the twins after their eighteenth birthday. None of this makes any sense. I just hope they will accept me when they find out who I am to them.
I squeeze Baler’s hand in return and walk with my head high and shoulders square, up to the altar. Ready to break this damn curse and claim what is rightfully mine.
Baler
I kissed her. My little valkyrie. The woman who stole my heart with a whimper. I kissed her.
I cannot believe this is true. I have a mate in Grace. Something I deemed impossible, never to happen after death. While human mating is not the same as a shifter’s mating, it is still symbolic and just as binding and passionate. When she started to tell me who I was to her, how her wolf had claimed me as her mate, I could not stop the desire that built inside of me. I had to bend down and seal my lips to hers. To taste her and show her how much those simple words affected me. I had wanted to do that since I first laid eyes on her over two months ago.
The girl was stunning and strong, albeit bullheaded at times, but that is all a part of her charm. She is mine though. Mine, yet destined to leave this place. Something I cannot do. Why must the Gods be so cruel as to finally grant me something I have longed for, for so long, only to rip it away from me.
I catch Odin’s eye when we exit the bathing room, his flick to our joined hands and a smile crinkles the corner of his mouth. He is pleased. Does that mean he has a plan to fix this? Can he give me a way to stay with her? I will have to speak with him later on the matter, right now though, this is about Grace and helping her become whole.
Grace
"Slide up on the altar, Grace." Fenrir directs me up on the altar. To say my nerves weren't firing off audibly in my ears, like those little poppers you throw at the ground on the Fourth of July and New Year’s, would be a lie. My knees are knocking together so hard, causing each step to waver. My hands are shaky, sweaty messes as I try, and fail, to grip the side of the altar to steady myself.
Warm hands slide around my waist from behind me as a solid chest presses into my back. The sweet masculine scent that can only belong to one man fills me to my toes, calming my racing heart and frantic nerves. Baler. His lips meet my ear, and my eyes drift shut at the comfort his presence gives me. "You do not have to do this if you are not ready. You can wait."
Can I really? No.
All my nervous energy fades at the thought of not freeing my wolf, replaced by the need for vengeance. The thought of having been chained and locked away for twenty years terrifies, distresses, and infuriates me. I wouldn't survive that, and I will not force her to endure it a moment longer. I will free her.
"I have to do this. I have to free her," I declare. Locking my knees and spine straight, I stand tall and gather every ounce of strength, determination, and will-power I have.
"There's my warrior," Baler whispers before placing a kiss just behind the lobe of my ear, causing a shiver to race down my spine. My nerves spark for a completely different reason this time. Baler's tightening grip on my waist tells me that he felt my reaction, and he likes it. Clearing his throat and reigning in his own reactions, he says, "Alright, up with you." Then he lifts me up and places me on the altar in front of us.
"You're not leaving, are you?" I ask him as he drops his hands from my waist.
"Not a chance, Little Valkyrie,” he says with a smile. A sigh escapes me, with the reassurance he'll be here through this with me. I can lean on that thought, and his strength.
Finding Fenrir and Odin watching our exchange, I nod to them
with an expression that I can only hope conveys the fearlessness I do not feel. "I'm ready."
Fenrir steps up to my right side. "Lie back, Grace. Try to remain calm," he directs me as he gently presses down on my shoulder, guiding my body to lie back. "You will feel a slight burn in the beginning that will start in your abdomen. Gradually, that burn will start to intensify into a stabbing sensation. That sensation will transform into the worst pain you have ever felt, magnified tenfold. We will try to shield you from it as much as possible. However, we cannot shield you from it all." The look on his face holds concern and empathy for what he's about to inflict on me.
"Do you have any questions?" Odin asks as he comes to stand on my other side, across from Fenrir.
Unable to speak for fear that I'll talk myself out of this, I just shake my head.
"In that case then, Fenrir, let us proceed."
Odin places one hand on the crown of my head, and the other on my upper abdomen as Fenrir places his left hand spanning my collarbone, and his right on my lower abdomen. My breathing picks up as my nerves run rampant, and I try to remain calm.
"You can do this, Grace." I hear Baler to my right. Though he’s out of my peripheral vision, I can feel his presence surrounding me. I can do this. I can do this. I remind myself, like a mantra, I repeat it over and over again in my head as I consciously relax each muscle, starting at my toes. Wiggling my toes, I focus on each one, untangling the muscles. Melting into the altar underneath me. I can do this. I can do this. My legs get heavy as each muscle goes slack.
"That's it, Grace. Breathe and relax," Baler encourages.
As my abdominal muscles relax, I feel Odin and Fenrir press in a little deeper, grounding me. My back, chest and shoulders begin to relax. Down each arm, my muscles uncoil one at a time and my limbs sink into the altar.
With my body completely relaxed now, I can hear Odin and Fenrir chanting something in a language I have never heard. Warmth begins to spread from where their hands touch my body, flooding me from my head to the tips of my fingers and toes. Filling me with magic that feels like a caress of their hands.
Gradually the heat builds inside me, it's not bad at first. It’s actually rather relaxing, like sinking into a warm bath of sweet vanilla bubbles. Until it's not. The heat turns boiling as my muscles, tendons, and skin feel as though they’re blistering and splitting apart. I've felt this before, after I died and was reborn here. If this was all it took to break the curse, why didn't it break when I died the first time? Why do I have to go through this again?
No. I can't do this. Stop. Stop. Oh Gods, please stop. My mouth opens on a silent scream as the searing pain morphs into a feeling of being ripped apart from the inside out. Every bone feels like it's being shattered, ground into dust.
Boiling tears leak from my overheated eyes as the pain becomes unbearable, and the sound of breaking bones echoes in my head. Stop. Stop. Stop.
Fenrir's hands press down on my abdomen and chest, holding me as my body begins to thrash under his grip. Pained and terrified howling echoes through my mind. Fenrir and Odin's chanting never stops. Even as a deep scream escapes me when an agonizing wave of extreme pain floods my system, so intense it causes my locked limbs to fly out, sending a burst of energy soaring through the room.
“You have people you care about in your life. Do you not? Find her or they will pay for your incompetence!” Alastair stands behind father’s old mahogany desk that mother gifted him a year after he took over as Alpha, screaming at the phone on his desk.
“I told you already. I haven’t seen this girl you’re looking for. Maybe if you gave me more to go on than just some picture from ten years ago, I might have better luck finding her,” a frantic, deep male voice echoes from the speaker.
Alastair lets out a huff of frustration as he grips the back of the high-back leather chair. “Her name is Riley. The last I heard, she was working at some shifter bar,” he states in a cool tone with more control than his body exudes. “If you want to be able to locate her on that lead, you will need to do so, soon. From what I have heard, she changes employers as quickly as she does sex partners.”
“What exactly is it you want me to do once I locate this girl? I will not hurt her, Alastair.”
An evil smirk grows on his face as he replies, “Oh, you’ll hurt her. Just not in the physical sense of the word. However, for now, all I’d like for you to do is watch her and report back to me on her movements.”
“Whatever.”
Dead air hangs for a long moment before Alastair calls out, “Wilder?” A look of contempt and fury spread over his posture. “Wilder? Answer me.”
A dial tone resounds through the open space and Alastair roars his ire, “You better not cross me, if you know what’s good for you, Boy.”
“Grace.” My name echoes through Alastair’s office. Vibrating off the stone walls. It’s faint and muffled, as though the one who spoke it was in distress. A hand or gag hindering their speech.
“Grace, come back to me, Love.”
The worry and plea that resounds through that voice penetrates something deep within my soul. I know that voice.
Mate. A voice, no more than a whisper, sounds in the back of my mind.
“Mate,” I repeat to myself.
“Come on, Little Valkyrie. You have to fight. You have to come back to me, now. I just found you, Grace. I am not ready to let you go already.”
Recognition dawns, and I remember, clear as the morning sun on a cloudless day. Baler. Looking around the room, I try to spot the man that has taken a piece of me and now owns it. A piece of my heart. Nothing.
“Baler, where are you?” I cry out.
Warmth envelopes my body from a source I can’t see.
I glance back at Alastair one last time, a war in my head over if I should stay. I need more information. I need to know what he’s planning. Who is this Wilder guy? Why is Alastair using him to spy on Riley?
As I go to take a step towards the desk, a tugging in the center of my chest halts my movement. “Come on, Grace. Please.”
A shockwave of lightning courses through my body, arresting the air from my lungs and everything turns blindingly white.
Baler
Fear, unlike anything I have ever felt in my one thousand years of life, grips my heart in a vice. Grace is lying prone on the altar; unmoving, pale, and silent. Not even the sounds of breath leaving her body is audible. Only just moments ago, she was howling in agonizing pain as every bone in her body contorted in and out of transformation. After what has felt like a lifetime of unbearable torment, a blinding energy tears its way from her body, sending me flying into the nearest unyielding wall.
Silence rings through the room after, and my heart begins to hammer behind my aching rib cage as I watch Grace’s body suddenly still. Groaning, I crawl my way back to my knees, leaning against the stone wall for support.
Odin’s hands on her head and abdomen begin to glow a radiant white as Fenrir shakes his head slowly. A look of disbelief and grief marring his normally stoic face.
“No,” I rasp. “No… no… no.” Jumping up the rest of the way on unsteady legs, I stumble my way to the imposing altar.
Pushing Fenrir to the side, I fall to my knees at Grace’s side. With his glowing hands still on her, never breaking contact, Odin pulls my attention to him. “Baler, call to her. Guide her back from the dreamscape she landed in. If you do not, she may not be able to find her way out in her weakened state.”
I do not fully understand what he means by that. However, I do understand the threat of losing Grace looming over me. So, I will not argue, but just do as he says. I will do anything if it means keeping Grace here with me. I pick up her hand that lies hanging from the altar. The warmth I normally associate with Grace’s presence is gone now. Her tiny hand is pale and deathly cold between my much larger ones.
Placing a kiss on her knuckle, I plead with her, “Grace.” My voice, raspy and hoarse from trying to hold back the emotions threaten
ing to consume me.
“Grace, come back to me, Love.” A crack forms in the walls around my heart, my past breaking free at the fear of losing anyone else. A fear that never truly leaves someone.
Placing her hand over my heart, I cup it there with one hand and place my other on her cheek. “Come on, Little Valkyrie. You have to fight. You have to come back to me, now.” Leaning in so my lips just brush her ear, I whisper, “I just found you, Grace. I am not ready to let you go already.”
A shiver works its way through Grace. “There she is,” Odin declares. “Keep going, Baler. You almost have her.”
Standing on shaky legs, I lean over Grace’s body and cradle her face in my hands. I kiss her lips before resting my forehead on hers and whisper, “Come on, Grace. Please.” The last word a begging plea. Every ounce of fear and passion I feel towards this tiny slip of a woman poured into that one word.
Passion I had kept under lock and key since she came barreling into my afterlife. Fear that I may now lose her.
A current like lightning rushes through me and into Grace, causing her back to arch and throw me off balance. I stumble back into Fenrir, who thankfully catches me before I am able to regain my balance.
Grace gasps in a lung full of air and slumps back into the altar. “What was that?” I ask.
Odin gently removes his hands from her body. He’s sweaty and looking much older than he ever has before. “She is going to be all right now,” he rasps. “Well done, Baler. Your bond pulled her back.”
My what? Shocked by Odin’s descriptions of what that was, I stand there unmoving and breathless.
Fenrir shuffles up beside Odin, taking hold of his elbow to guide him down the stairs. “Why don’t you take her into the bathing room? Soak in the pool with her. The warmth of the water will help bring her back and ease the soreness of the transitions from her body. The minerals will also help to ease the pain from you as well. That hit into the wall was not gentle by any means,” he suggests, nodding to the wall behind me.
Death's Gift: Norse Blessed Book One Page 5