The Moments Between

by Natalie Banks

  My heart sank, the slamming door echoing in my mind.

  Well aware this was completely my fault.

  He didn’t do anything wrong.

  I was just so angry.

  At myself.

  At everything.

  The tears started to fall, and when they did, they didn’t stop for an hour. I cried for Teddy, I cried for Ben, I cried for the boys, and I cried for myself.

  June 3rd was only two weeks away.

  The dream that was unfolding right in front of my very eyes, and I was incapable of stopping it.

  I yelled up at the night sky, at God or whoever was listening.

  “How dare YOU!” I screamed.

  My words echoed in the night. No one answered me. Not that I expected anyone to.

  I sat under the string lights alone and looked at the untouched glasses of wine. Guilt swiftly coursed through me. He was only trying to help…

  I heard the backdoor click open, and soon after footsteps followed.

  Ben came over and pulled his chair closer to mine. He reached out, grabbing both of my hands in his. He pulled them up to his mouth and kissed them.

  “I’m sorry I lost my temper, Claire.” His eyes were sincere.

  “No…Ben, it’s me…it’s my fault. I shouldn’t have said those things. They weren’t true…you’re a good man…” My words were cut off by my sobs.

  “God, Claire…what’s going on? Please…let me help you.” The strain in his voice distinct.

  I couldn’t tell him. Even now, I couldn’t tell him the truth.

  “I’m just tired…I think…I haven’t been sleeping well, for some reason…”

  He looked at me for a moment and then reached in and hugged me.

  “It’s okay. Let’s get you inside, so you can get some rest…” He lifted me up by my arm and we walked together inside.

  He stayed close to me in the bed throughout the whole night. His way of trying to provide comfort. I knew he didn’t quite believe my lack of sleep as the answer to all of this, but he chose to let it be…and I actually slept through the night without waking once.

  The next morning Ben got up and made coffee. I stayed in bed, not wanting to get up. My body craved more sleep, and my mind craved more escape.

  He appeared in the doorway holding my favorite mug. A chunky blue and white, glazed, hand-made mug that we had bought on our honeymoon in Rio.

  It was our honeymoon destination by happenstance. His mom had won a trip for two to Brazil, in a raffle, and had gifted it to us for our wedding.

  It included a full week at a five-star resort right on the beach in Copacabana with our own private veranda. We spent the days on the beach, basking in the South American sun and splashing in the crystal blue waters of the ocean. Our nights were spent dancing to live Brazilian music in the streets. The beat of the music, coursing through our bodies.

  We purchased the mug on our last full day in Rio. After perusing a small marketplace for souvenirs, we met an elderly woman who was selling her handmade pottery out the back of an old rusted pickup truck. She didn’t have any teeth, nor did she speak English, but her kindness transcended language.

  On our way back to the hotel, we purchased a bottle of spiced rum, sharing it that night out of that very mug. We made love on the beach, under the stars, then stayed up talking until dawn. One of the best nights of my life.

  As he handed me the warm mug of coffee, I wondered if he had chosen it specifically as another way to reconnect with me.

  I sat up and smiled weakly.

  “Thank you…” I offered.

  He smiled softly. “Listen, I have an idea. Why don’t we get your mom or your sister to watch the boys this weekend, and let’s go on a little trip together. Get you out of the house?”

  I looked back at him, not responding. His face so full of hope and expectancy.

  It was impossible to say no. Not to mention, a change of scenery might do me some good.

  “Yeah.” I nodded. “I’m sure my mom could do it.”

  He let out a sigh of relief. “Well, it’s settled then. I am taking the whole weekend off and making plans for us! Pack your bags, little missy!”

  He kissed my forehead and headed downstairs to take the boys to school.

  I knew this was more of him trying to make things better. The only way he knew how. I loved him for that. I just wished I could appreciate this moment, but the knowledge of June 3rd being one day closer filled me with trickling terror.

  I had only one thing going in my favor.

  He didn’t take the train. He’s never taken the train.

  I repeated the mantra to myself…he can’t be killed on a train that he doesn’t take.

  Maybe fate really did have things wrong after all.

  Chapter 15

  I woke up early on Saturday morning to glaring sunshine. I grabbed an overnight bag and began packing. I threw in a green, strappy, summer dress and a pair of white shorts and a gauzy purple top with bell sleeves, along with a pair of comfortable sandals. They seemed to be appropriate choices for the locale.

  Ben had chosen New Bern, a beautiful and romantic waterfront city near the coast, for our weekend getaway. As I packed, I could feel myself relaxing. The distraction was good for me. Maybe Ben was right, after all. I needed a break.

  Soon after I was packed, we loaded the boys in the car and drove them to my mom’s house. They were so excited because they didn’t spend many nights at Gammy’s house. I only hoped that they wouldn’t be too much for her to handle. It had been a long time since she had to care for children for an entire weekend.

  She came out the front door when we pulled up, meeting us on the walkway.

  “Boys!! I missed your faces!” she called out.

  They ran and hugged her, almost knocking her down. I looked over at Ben, and I could see he had the same concern I did.

  “Boys, take it easy on Gammy, now,” he laughed, but I knew by his tone that he meant business. The boys did too. They both looked back at him and nodded.

  After a quick hug and kiss goodbye, the boys ran inside to where Gammy had promised there would be chocolate chip muffins waiting for them.

  Mom came up and hugged me. “Honey, have a great time. Don’t worry about us. The boys will be fine.”

  As I looked at her, I noticed she was wearing makeup. She hadn’t worn makeup in years…and she was smiling. Something else I hadn’t seen in years, either. It was strange behavior, but I took it as a good sign.

  Mom seemed confident about the boys staying, so I let my worry go. Figuring she was probably glad to have the company.

  I kissed her cheek and we were off to New Bern.

  As soon as we pulled into the city limits, I was caught up in the magic of New Bern.

  As the afternoon sun filled the sky, I gazed out at the picturesque streets lined with Spanish moss draped trees and fragrant flowering bushes. Breathtaking historic homes lined the sidewalks of the charming city. My face pressed close to the window as we drove past Georgian style houses, Victorian and Colonial homes, and Neoclassical style mansions with their towering columns, all with wide and inviting lawns.

  We finally came to a stop in front of a Victorian Style home with white scalloped shingle siding. There were wide double porches, ornate with intricate wood trimmings. A large tower with a pointed roof stood on the right side of the house. The architecture was exquisite. Taking my breath.

  I looked over at Ben with wide eyes, hoping this was the inn we were staying at.

  It was.

  We got out of the car, and with luggage in hand, walked past a wooden sign hung on a stake and squeaking as it swayed in the wind.

  It read The Theodore House: 1885.

  Ben led me down the inviting walkway lined with petunias and straight up onto a broad wraparound porch. Ei
ght large, black rockers sat along the span of the porch with potted flowers on stands sporadically placed around them. Overflowing green ferns hung from the porch eaves. The sound of bird songs surrounded the property and mixed with piano music that seeped lightly out of an outdoor speaker.

  Ben opened the front door and we stepped inside the open foyer.

  We were greeted by an older woman.

  “Hello and welcome to The Theodore House! My name is Edda and I am the overseer of the property.” She was beautiful, her silver hair twisted up in a bun. She spoke with the most distinguished southern accent I had ever heard, reminding me of Gone with the Wind.

  Ben stood beside her while she did our paperwork, and I wandered off into the parlor, a large room just to the right of the foyer. I walked inside past several couches centered around a large fireplace. I ran my hand along the edge of an antique Steinway piano. A grandfather clock stood against the wall, ticking softly. Two tables flanked the clock, each with a small Tiffany lamp. The room was filled with the same music I had heard on the porch. I imagined the coziness of cuddling up by the fire in here with a hot cup of tea.

  After Ben got us checked in, an older gentleman, who introduced himself as Frank, led us up the curved wooden staircase to the wide hallway of the second floor.

  We walked past rooms with gold-plated signs on them. Each the name of a tree. We passed The Oak Room, The Maple Room, and The Magnolia, before he opened the door to The Dogwood Room.

  The door swung open, giving us a view in to the splendor. As we stepped inside, Ben tipped Frank five dollars and closed the door.

  I scanned the room, taking it all in.

  There was a large canopy bed covered in luxurious linens and a fireplace with an intricate hand-carved mantle. Two French leather chairs sat in the corner with a marble topped table situated between them and a bottle of complimentary wine on top. I stepped over to the large window on the far wall and saw it overlooked a brick-tiled courtyard garden filled with flowers, several benches, and a flowing fountain in the middle.

  I left the window and went to explore the large bathroom, my shoes echoing across the white marble floor. The centerpiece of the bathroom was a porcelain clawfoot tub with a glistening British telephone style faucet.

  I came out the bathroom, smiling. Ben smiled back, knowing he had done well.

  “Do you like it?” he asked, though he already knew the answer.

  “I couldn’t be happier, Ben. This is exactly what I needed,” I answered, as his eyes twinkled with the joy of success.

  After we unpacked, we walked to Middle Street to explore New Bern’s downtown, situated on the sparkling Neuse and Trent Rivers. We strolled the city streets, hand in hand, popping into any shop that sparked our interest. A breeze blew around us, encircling us, smelling of fresh river water. After a few hours we stopped grab dinner at a quaint corner café just off the main strip.

  When we walked out, we found the afternoon had fully slipped away. The evening consumed us, as a light wind blew soft and sweet. We walked hand in hand down the sidewalk back to the inn, passing by porch lights putting off a warm and inviting glow, and homes with open windows, with the chatter of families drifting out.

  I walked closer to Ben, the sky above us colored in an inky plum and filled with dazzling starlight. Ben stopped mid-step and took me in his arms, kissing me under a streetlight as a palmetto leaves rustled in the trees around us.

  When we got back in the room, Ben lit the gas fireplace for ambiance and opened the bottle of wine.

  “Don’t you think we’ve had enough?” I laughed, still feeling a little buzz from the beer.

  “A little more won’t hurt,” he said as he poured us both a generous glass.

  With my wine glass in hand, I wandered to the bathroom and exclaimed, “I feel like a bath,” as I eyeballed the magnificent tub.

  Ben followed in behind me, turned on the water and lowered the lights. The bathroom filled with the roaring sound of the water as it filled the tub. Foggy steam rose up and fogged the mirror as I dropped my clothes to the floor.

  Ben watched me intently, leaning against the sink, admiring the view.

  I stuck one foot into the water slowly, letting out a small scream from the shock of the hot water, then followed it with my other foot. Once inside the tub, I lowered myself slowly until I sank all the way down into the deep basin. The hot water enveloping me.

  Ben came over and handed me my glass of wine, taking a seat on the edge of the tub. He dipped his hand in and let the drips of warm water run down his fingers onto my chest and over my breasts. His eyes shimmering in the low light.

  “You want to get in?” I offered.

  “I’d rather you get out,” Ben answered as he ran his fingertips across my jawline down my neck to my collarbone.

  “I will, in a few minutes…let me finish my wine and I will be right there.” Enjoying the power that I had over him. Making him wait.

  He leaned over and kissed me, slipping his warm tongue in my mouth. I could taste the wine in his mouth, and I kissed him back. He slipped his hand down into the water and put his fingers inside of me. I groaned as delicious feelings ignited.

  He pulled his hand back out of the water and splashed me.

  “You better hurry up with this bath, young lady!”

  “But, wait, you’re stopping already?” Wondering, who had the power now?

  “Oh, that was just a sneak peek of what’s to come after your bath,” he said as he winked at me.

  He went out into the bedroom and closed the bathroom door behind him.

  I sunk down deeper in the water, all the way up to my chin. Enraptured.

  It felt so good to be here. To just relax.

  Nothing on my mind except getting out and going to where my sexy husband was waiting for me.

  I finished the last sips of my wine and got out of the tub. Feeling rather tipsy, I slipped on one of Ben’s t-shirts without panties and opened the bathroom door.

  Once I stepped out, I was met with the sound of light snoring. Ben’s empty glass on the night table.

  I sighed and crawled into bed beside him, thankful to have this weekend with Ben. With no anxiety. No fear. Just the two of us here. Safe from Charlotte and the dream.

  Before I could count to ten, the fluffy pillows and comforter engulfed me, and I fell into a deep sleep.

  When morning came, I tossed and turned, caught in a dream about the old man next door.

  I ran as he chased me through endless mazes of tall green hedges. Running faster and faster, but he was always there, right behind me.

  Stumbling, falling, trying to escape. Meeting dead end after dead end. Endless green swirled around me. Suffocating me.

  My strength dwindling as I was caught in another dead end. I turned…and he was there, his crystal blue eyes ablaze.

  Right before he grabbed me, I jolted awake.

  With eyes still closed, I reached desperately for Ben in the bed and found only empty space.

  Just as the panic began, I heard a sound I didn’t recognize.

  Loud lurching and groaning.

  My eyes flew open, looking around in bewilderment.

  Disoriented.

  Suddenly it came into focus. The Theodore House Inn.

  The menacing sounds were coming from Ben’s shower as water rushed in old pipes.

  All at once, relief flooded me, and I let out a long exhale.

  I was safe.

  Ben was safe.

  And nothing here could hurt us.

  Before long, the shower turned off, and Ben came out with a towel wrapped around his waist. The sight of him reminded me of last night and instantly stirred me. Water was still running down his face as he searched for the clothes to wear.

  Still dripping, he came over to the bed and gave me a long kiss.
/>   “Good morning sunshine.” His eyes had a spark in them. “You ready for our day?”

  We had a full day of activities planned, otherwise I would’ve pulled him straight into the bed with me, and from the look in his eyes, I was sure he was thinking the same thing.

  I got up and put on the dress I had brought with me and applied a little bit of makeup. I tucked my blonde hair, already lighter from the spring sunshine, behind my ears and came out of the bathroom.

  As soon as Ben saw me, he smiled.

  “Let’s go beautiful.” He took my hand and led me to the door.

  We emerged from our room and instantly heard the sounds of morning and of the other guests downstairs.

  Edda met us at the bottom of the stairs and led us out onto the veranda, where a live harpist played her melodies. We sat at a small garden table sipping on mimosas and nibbling on fresh pastries. Ben and I sat together, our fingers entwined across the table. Butterflies flitted and flew around us, dancing with the music.

  I looked at Ben and playfully said, “You know you passed out on me last night…”

  “Oh, well I guess I owe you then?” He had a laugh in his voice. “Maybe even owe you double…” He winked at me and we both laughed out loud. A few people turned toward our laughter. I felt my face redden even though I knew they had no idea what we had been talking about.

  Our first activity of the day was a historic tour of New Bern. We arrived at the tour depot about five minutes early. A small crowd gathered by the parked trolley, so we joined them. Not long after, the tour guide came around the corner smiling, wearing a white shirt, red tie, and black pants. His greeting lively and energetic. His part well-rehearsed, and he was ready to entertain and regale us with stories of the past.

  As we rode around the city, the guide told us stories about many of the historic homes and places we passed. He even told tales about some that were haunted. I shivered, remembering the old man with crystal blue eyes, and scooted closer to Ben.

  The last stop was The Christ Episcopal Church. We climbed out of the trolley and stood under large overhanging trees with draping Spanish moss, staring up at the magnificent brick structure. The church was built in a Gothic Revival style with enormous stained-glass windows. Ben and I walked together inside and gazed at the stunning interior of the church. We lingered long after the rest of tourists had exited.