Authentic Gravitas

by Rebecca Newton

  Be prepared to be a target of your colleagues’ influence, rather than simply focusing on influencing them. If you are truly sharing ownership of the goal, make sure you have clearly allocated roles and responsibilities. This will help guide the process for who takes the lead and influences whom at various stages and decisions along the way. Regardless of the allocation, be first to reallocate praise for successes and first to take responsibility for failures. If you see others giving credit to you and not your partner(s), or highlighting their failings at no cost to you, direct some praise to them or shoulder some of the responsibility for those failings.

  Make sure you’re building real time to collaborate into your schedules and give your efforts the space and energy they need to be successful. It’s easier to build this time in at the beginning, when we’re excited about where the collaboration could go. But rarely is it our only responsibility. We can get caught up in other tasks that require our time, but the potential of collaboration can only be realized if we continue to (psychologically and practically) commit to it.

  See if you really are “close enough to fight”—in a good way, that is—going beyond the niceties and being prepared to be honest and challenge one another. Our uncertainty about others’ intentions can hold us back from really opening up. Think about the people you’re working alongside. Do you know their intentions? If you’re not sure, it’s worth asking them—just go in prepared to share yours, too (probably first).

  Ultimately, for collaboration, we need trust. If we are committed to building genuine trust, then we need to follow through with the behaviors outlined above to ensure it’s mutual, based on a strong understanding, and grounded in an ongoing commitment. Remember that for mutual trust, one person has to take the first step—be prepared to take it.

  CONCLUSION

  THE AUTHENTIC GRAVITAS JOURNEY

  The Myth of the Gravitas Gift would have us believe that some people are “naturals” when it comes to having other people take them seriously. These people seem to carry the most weight, regardless of hierarchy, and effortlessly command respect from those around them. But in reality, they have most likely worked very hard at developing skills and behaviors that allow them to credibly have a positive impact and add significant value. As a result, their contributions are in line with their values and are taken seriously, engendering feelings of respect and trust in others.

  The Myth of Confidence would have us believe that people with gravitas wake up feeling confident every single day. They don’t—or at least, not every day. And certainly, as they continue to step into new opportunities and take on new challenges, their confidence wavers just like everyone else’s. We all want confidence, but courage precedes it. Don’t wait to feel confident; clarify your goals for impact and commit to courage, connection, and curiosity. As you do so, regularly seeking feedback and continuing to adapt, you minimize the gap between your intention and your impact. The Myth of Charisma would whisper, if we let it, that we just don’t have what it takes—I’m not enough. But we know that authentic gravitas isn’t reserved for people with a certain personality. You can have gravitas and still be you.

  There are so many areas about who stands out and why yet to be explored with future research. Let’s take a final look at the truths about authentic gravitas, as we know them so far:

  It’s more about courage than it is about confidence. Courage precedes confidence.

  It’s about leading—taking ownership of and responsibility for a situation to influence and facilitate others to achieve collective goals. It’s not about waiting for a position of leadership.

  It’s more about a commitment to developing skills than it is about natural style. It’s not something you’re born with, and there’s no fixed personal characteristic requirement for gravitas.

  It’s not about being serious and self-important. It’s about being taken seriously and considered important—being valued—because you’re making a valuable contribution.

  It’s as much about inquiry as it is about advocacy. It’s not being the loudest voice in the room that counts. It is about clearly and persuasively explaining your thinking, offering insights, and not shying away from expressing your point of view. It’s about having conviction without being dogmatic. Equally, your understanding of the situation and others’ motivations and perspectives matters. Curiosity counts. The people who stand out in the crowd are those who move toward the crowd, not those who focus on standing apart from it.

  It’s about credibility with a commitment to learning and increasing knowledge, as well as how you use that knowledge, but also remembering that knowledge alone is not enough. Inspiring people live inspired.

  Anyone can authentically have gravitas. Being authentic isn’t about staying the same, defaulting to “natural,” unintentional habits. It’s about adapting and growing to increasingly act in ways that align clear intention with actual impact. Authenticity requires agility.

  Rather than being an invincible superhero, gravitas demands vulnerability, discipline, and humility. It requires vulnerability to get feedback about ways in which your impact may not line up with your intention, discipline to keep trying out and sticking with new behaviors to achieve the impact you’re after, and humility to accept that two or more heads really are better than one. People with authentic gravitas are collaborators, not independent heroes.

  We want to add great value, but habits and busyness can get in the way. My hope is that as you’ve come with me on this gravitas journey, some of the ideas and practical steps have stood out and been useful to you. Most of all, I hope that you intentionally and courageously implement those practices in the midst of the pressures and realities of daily organizational life, and that when you reflect on the question, Did I add the most value that I could today? your answer will be increasingly and authentically yes.

  ACKNOWLEDGMENTS

  I’m thankful to be surrounded by outstanding people who make a positive, significant difference to my life. They have made an incredible contribution to my personal and professional journey.

  First, I’m grateful to my clients. While I have changed names and some details, the accounts in this book are all based on the experiences of real people. Thank you for inviting me into your worlds and sharing your stories. We often believe that our challenges are unique to us and our strengths are commonplace. By being vulnerable and open with what you find hard, you help us see that our challenges are largely shared, and it is our strengths that are unique. By having the courage to try out new things, you have paved the way for others to discover strategies and behaviors that may equip them. My sincere thanks to the research participants for sharing your time, insights, and experiences. Thank you to my many colleagues and friends passionate about leadership and professional development for your wisdom, ideas, and relentless encouragment, and to the researchers globally whose dedicated work has informed the ideas in this book.

  I have the wonderful opportunity to wear both a practitioner and an academic hat. It has been twenty years since I first walked into the London School of Economics and Political Science, and I still learn something new every day. Thank you to all those in the Department of Management with whom I have the privilege of working. My particular thanks to Paul Willman, Saul Estrin, Jackie Coyle-Shapiro, Connson Locke, and Joanne Hay for welcoming me into the Department of Management, and to Sandy Pepper and Emma Soane, who have guided me so wisely for many years, who encouraged me to write, and who demonstrate authentic gravitas every day. Thank you also to my LSE students—I am inspired by your energy and determination to make a significant difference in your world. During my time at Harvard University, I was amazed by the generosity of so many incredible people, particularly Jeff Polzer, the late J. Richard Hackman, and Paul R. Lawrence. Thank you for your welcome, and your input and challenges to my ideas.

  To my in
credible team at CoachAdviser, thank you for being on this book journey with me, and for allowing it to take such a central place in our working life. Particular thanks to Tia Aitken, Kimberley Rayman, and especially Patrycja Sowa—for helping me navigate the vast research literature and for your enthusiasm for this project, which at times surpassed my own. I’m also thankful to the executive education teams at LSE, the University of Cambridge Møller Centre, and Duke Corporate Education, who have invited me to facilitate development programs with some of the world’s largest, industry-leading organizations. These opportunities enabled me to partner with and learn from the very best, and to explore what is most useful to global organizations in preparing leaders for the future.

  This book was a thought in my mind for many years, but it only came to life because of my incredible literary agent, Giles Anderson. Thank you for seeing the potential in, and for your commitment to, both this book and me. Your advice and guidance have been invaluable. To the teams at TarcherPerigee and Orion, thank you for your excitement about my book and your superb direction. Particular thanks to my excellent editor, Joanna Ng—I am so grateful for your advice, patience, and encouragement from beginning to end. Thank you to the teams at Forbes, particularly Fred Allen, and at Harvard Business Review for giving me the opportunity to share and test my ideas. In particular, thanks to Sarah Green-Carmichael at HBR. Your writing and editorial skills are exceptional, your insights always spot-on, and I have learned so much from you.

  I have many friends who are also my most trusted advisers and mentors—thank you all for your fierce belief in me. Particular thanks to Elsbeth Johnson, Meghan Oates-Zalesky, Lea Waldron, Vicky Rough, Flip and Susan Flippen, James Prior, Ana Loback, Melanie Backe-Hansen, Rosalie Audoin, and Sal Dennis—I have navigated the opportunities and challenges of this professional adventure much better thanks to you. I am extremely grateful to Paul Brewerton, who has been my closest mentor for nearly twenty years, and whose detailed critique made this book better. I am thankful to Gary and Cathy Clarke for encouraging me to always “look up,” and to Kris and Kalleigh Mikkelson, who show me what it is to lead with authenticity every day.

  Finally, thanks to all who walked this book journey with me—you know who you are, my “besties.” Apparently, there are some people in the world who would say, “It can’t be done. You’re crazy,” to a mum of two, signing a book deal while eight months pregnant with her third child and launching a new business. I’m glad I don’t know them. Thank you to my dear friends who tell me I can when I feel like I can’t. My faith and my friends are two of the biggest parts of who I am, making me feel like my version of “normal” is actually exciting, meaningful, and fun. And to my incredible family—thank you to the Newton-Darbys for your wise counsel and everyday fun; to the van Dijk family for your encouragement; and to my parents, Ray and Lesley Newton, for telling me all my life that I could do anything (and practically enabling me through being the best grandparents in the world). Above all, I am so grateful for the unwavering love, patience, and support of my husband, Stephan, and our three little munchkins, Saskia, Sam, and Amélie—you are my rock, my reason, and my smile. Thank you.

  NOTES

  CHAPTER 1: THE MYTHS OF GRAVITAS

  1. Definition of gravitas from the Cambridge Advanced Learner’s Dictionary & Thesaurus, https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/gravitas.

  2. Definition of gravitas from the English Oxford Living Dictionary, https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/gravitas.

  3. T. Brosch and D. Sander, “Neurocognitive Mechanisms Underlying Value-Based Decision-Making: From Core Values to Economic Value,” Frontiers in Human Neuroscience 7 (2013): 398. Definitions of value from the Oxford Dictionary of English, https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/value (accessed December 13, 2018).

  4. Adapted from R. Newton, “What Kind of Leader Do You Want to Be?” Harvard Business Review, January 26, 2015, https://hbr.org/2015/01/what-kind-of-leader-do-you-want-to-be.

  5. M.E. Palanski, K.L. Cullen, W.A. Gentry, and C.M. Nichols, “Virtuous Leadership: Exploring the Effects of Leaders’ Courage and Behavioral Integrity on Leader Performance and Image,” Journal of Business Ethics 132, no. 2 (2015): 297–310.

  6. J. Ménard and L. Brunet, “Authenticity and Well-Being in the Workplace: A Mediation Model,” Journal of Managerial Psychology 26, no. 4 (2011): 331–346.

  7. U.B. Metin, T.W. Taris, M.C.W. Peeters, I. Van Beek, and R. van den Bosch, “Authenticity at Work: A Job-Demands Resources Perspective,” Journal of Managerial Psychology 31, no. 2 (2016): 483–499.

  8. A.M. Wood, A.P. Linley, J. Maltby, M. Baliousis, and S. Joseph, “The Authentic Personality: A Theoretical and Empirical Conceptualization and the Development of the Authenticity Scale,” Journal of Counseling Psychology 55, no. 3 (2008): 385–399.

  9. M.M. Koerner, “Courage as Identity Work: Accounts of Workplace Courage,” Academy of Management Journal 57, no. 1 (2014): 63–93.

  10. C.R. Rate, J.A. Clarke, D.R. Lindsay, and R.J. Sternberg, “Implicit Theories of Courage,” Journal of Positive Psychology 2, no. 2 (2007): 80–98.

  11. C.R. Woodard and C.L.S. Pury, “The Construct of Courage: Categorization and Measurement,” Consulting Psychology Journal: Practice and Research 59, no. 2 (2007): 135–147.

  12. D. van Dierendonck and I. Nuijten, “The Servant Leadership Survey: Development and Validation of a Multidimensional Measure,” Journal of Business and Psychology 26, no. 3 (2011): 249–267. The authors describe the theory of servant leadership, first introduced by Greenleaf (1997), as ethical and people-centered, including a moral component with emphasis on the needs of followers. The idea of service is embedded in the leader–follower relationship, whereby leaders have a genuine concern for followers.

  13. J.J. Sosik, W.A. Gentry, and J.U. Chun, “The Value of Virtue in the Upper Echelons: A Multisource Examination of Executive Character Strengths and Performance,” Leadership Quarterly 23, no. 3 (2012): 367–382.

  14. A. Bandura, Self-Efficacy: The Exercise of Control (New York: W. H. Freeman and Company, 1997).

  15. R.M. Tipton and E.L. Worthington, “The Measurement of Generalized Self-Efficacy: A Study of Construct Validity,” Journal of Personality Assessment 48, no. 5 (1984): 545–548.

  16. B. Amos and R.J. Klimoski, “Courage: Making Teamwork Work Well,” Group and Organization Management 39, no. 1 (2014): 110–128.

  17. L.E. Sekerka, R.P. Bagozzi, and R. Charnigo, “Facing Ethical Challenges in the Workplace: Conceptualizing and Measuring Professional Moral Courage,” Journal of Business Ethics 89, no. 4 (2009): 565–579. Even when looking at courageous efforts as having trait-like qualities, which are relatively stable over time, researchers argue that these features of one’s personal character can be developed in most people.

  18. D. Putman, “Philosophical Roots of the Concept of Courage,” in The Psychology of Courage: Modern Research on an Ancient Virtue, eds. C.L.S. Pury and S.J. Lopez (Washington, DC: American Psychological Association, 2010), 9–22.

  19. W.I. Miller, The Mystery of Courage (Cambridge, MA: Harvard University Press, 2002).

  20. R. Reed, If I Could Tell You Just One Thing . . . (Edinburgh: Canongate Books, 2016).

  21. M.E. Palanski et al., “Virtuous Leadership.”

  22. T. Thompson, P. Foreman, and F. Martin, “Imposter Fears and Perfectionistic Concern over Mistakes,” Personality and Individual Differences 29, no. 4 (2000): 629–647.

  23. D. Malhotra and F. Lumineau, “Trust and Collaboration in the Aftermath of Conflict: The Effects of Contract Structure,” Academy of Management Journal 54, no. 5 (2011): 981–998.

  CHAPTER 2: CONNECTION OVER CHARISMA

  1. “The World’s 100 Most Powerful Women (2010),” Forbes, https://www.forbes.com/lists/2010/11/power-women_2010.html.

  2. Adapted from R. Newton. “What Kind of Leader Do You Want to Be?”

  3. J.S
. Lerner, Y. Li, P. Valdesolo, and K. Kassam, “Emotions and Decision Making,” Annual Review of Psychology 66 (2015): 799–823.

  4. M. Seo and L.F. Barrett, “Being Emotional During Decision Making—Good or Bad? An Empirical Investigation,” Academy of Management Journal 50, no. 4 (2007): 923–940.

  5. B. Seymour and R. Dolan, “Emotion, Decision-Making, and the Amygdala,” Neuron 58, no. 5 (2008): 662–671.

  6. The first definition is from the English Oxford Living Dictionaries: Oxford University Press, https://en.oxforddictionaries.com/definition/charisma (accessed December 13, 2018). The second is from the Cambridge Advanced Learner’s Dictionary & Thesaurus: Cambridge University Press, https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/charisma (accessed December 13, 2018). Italics added.

  7. S. Plous, The Psychology of Judgment and Decision-Making (New York: McGraw-Hill, Inc., 1993).

  8. P.R. Wheeler and V. Arunachalam, “The Effects of Decision Aid Design on the Information Search Strategies and Confirmation Bias of Tax Professionals,” Behavioral Research in Accounting 20, no. 1 (2008): 131–145. Although confirmation bias is typically regarded as occurring in non-expert decision-makers, various studies such as this one show us that professionals do exhibit confirmation bias.