With Everything I Am

Home > Romance > With Everything I Am > Page 36
With Everything I Am Page 36

by Kristen Ashley


  Arranging the woolly throw over her, he murmured in a tone filled with regret, “I’ve work to do, little one.” He framed her face with his hands and touched his mouth to hers. “We’ll finish in a bit.” Shafts of tawny sliced through the blue of his eyes before he whispered, “There’re a few things I want you to do to me in that chair.”

  Sonia felt the throb pulse between her legs and she also heard the soft moan that caught in her throat.

  The gold took over the blue when he growled with approval, “In heat.”

  Then he kissed her, harder, longer and wetter before he let her go and went back to his desk.

  Once Sonia emerged from her pretend world of enchanted castles and fairytale kings you met in your dreams, she realized that she’d been in Scotland for three days.

  She didn’t intend to go to Scotland at all but she’d been there three days, met people she liked and fell in love with the village and the woods.

  She didn’t intend to have sex with Callum again but they’d had sex six times, not passable sex, not good sex, but (as usual) fantastic sex.

  But she did intend to get a few things straight which was the only thing she didn’t do.

  And she had to find the courage to do it, and soon. Or she was going to be doing things to Callum in his chair, things her mind was making up on its own, things that were making that throb beat between her legs and her breasts swell. Things that, the very thought of them, when Callum wasn’t even looking at her or speaking to her, were deeply affecting her.

  And she was, she decided, in serious, serious trouble.

  So deep was Sonia in her thoughts, when she heard the front door open, miles away (well, not exactly, just two floors of winding stairs and a long hall, but still), she didn’t even think to stop from looking toward the door.

  She thought about it when Callum said her name.

  Her body tensed but she looked toward him.

  He was studying her closely again, eyes narrowed, brows drawn.

  His ominous look.

  Finally, he asked, “Did you hear that?”

  Oh good goodness.

  She’d forgotten to hide her gift. Her father told her never, never to forget.

  She tried to cover. “Hear what?”

  Callum answered instantly, “Regan and Ryon arriving.”

  She stared at him.

  She knew it was Regan and Ryon too, she could hear their voices and they were getting closer.

  How did he –?

  He interrupted her thoughts, “Answer me, Sonia, did you hear that?”

  She didn’t have time to think about him hearing the arrival of his family. She still had to cover.

  “Ryon and Regan are here?” she asked, tossing the throw aside and standing.

  “You didn’t hear it?” he returned as he, too, stood and started toward her.

  She considered running.

  Instead, she lied, “No.” Then she cocked her head and went on lying, “Oh. I hear them now.”

  Anyone would, they were coming up the stairs.

  Callum stopped in front of her and looked down at her. “If you didn’t hear them, why did you turn your head the minute the front door opened?”

  “You can hear the front door open from all the way up here?” she asked immediately, shocked and extremely interested in this news at the same time still hiding her secret.

  “I can,” he replied tersely, stepping closer, making her tilt her head back to look at him and feeling the heat from his body then he finished with, “And so can you.”

  Her eyes flew wide, her mouth opened to deny it and Regan came through the door.

  “Cal! Sonny! It’s so good to be home!” she cried, rushing in, her face wreathed with smiles.

  Ryon was following her, his eyes were on both Sonia and Callum and they were wary like he felt the tense air.

  Callum turned to face his mother.

  “I hate that plane ride. It’s so long and you’re so pent up. There’s nowhere to roam,” Regan declared while placing her hand on Callum’s bicep, giving his cheek a kiss and then giving Sonia a hug.

  After Regan moved away, Sonia tried to step away from her mate.

  His arm slid around her shoulders.

  Sonia stopped moving.

  Callum tucked her into his side.

  “But I’m home now!” Regan announced gleefully before turning to Sonia. “And I want to know how you’re getting on, Sonny, but the very first thing I’m going to do is change my clothes and take a walk. Then I’m going to ask Drogan to light a fire in the knitting room and you’re going to tell me everything. Oh, I do hope Callum took you to the village. They have the best bakery in the world and I’m French so that’s saying something!” She grinned, looked between them and teased, “Then, I suppose, I’ll let Cal have you back for dinner.”

  “I’m glad you’re home, Regan,” Sonia smiled at her mother-in-law then turned her smile to Ryon. “And you too Ryon. Glad to see you safe.”

  “It’s good to be safe, Sonny,” Ryon smiled back.

  “Oh!” Regan cried suddenly. Sonia jumped and looked to see her mother-in-law was digging in her purse. “Things were… well, we didn’t get much time and I was just so happy everyone was okay and then I was worried about getting Sonny ready.” She pulled her wallet out of her purse and zipped it open. “So, I forgot, but…” Her arm extended toward Callum and she announced, “Here!”

  The wedding band Sonia gave to Callum was gleaming between her thumb and forefinger.

  Sonia stared at it and felt every muscle in her body grow so rigid, she feared if she moved she’d break into a million pieces.

  She watched as, casually, Callum reached out and took the band from his mother, murmuring his thanks. And, just as casually, he reached across Sonia’s rigid body and slid it on the finger that was curled around her shoulder.

  They said that people had their limits, their breaking points.

  That was Sonia’s.

  Something came over her. Something she’d never felt in her life. Something she didn’t understand, for a moment.

  Then she realized it was fury. It was a fury so mammoth, she could think of nothing else but it.

  She looked up at Callum not noticing the air in the room had gone dense as all of its inhabitants sensed her rage.

  “I need a word,” she declared before yanking out of his arm and practically running to their bedroom.

  In the seconds before Callum followed her in and shut the door, Sonia realized that the time had come.

  She was going to do this.

  Now.

  She lifted her hand out, palm up and demanded, “Give me my ring.”

  Callum was watching her carefully, arms crossed on his chest as he asked, “Sorry?”

  She wriggled her fingers. “My ring. Give it to me.”

  He wasn’t watching her carefully anymore. He realized what she was talking about and his jaw clenched.

  Then he asked, “Why?”

  “It doesn’t mean anything to you. And, when I bought it, I wasn’t certain it meant anything to me.” She watched the muscle leap warningly in his jaw at these words but she was too enraged to care. “But then it did. It meant something. And it isn’t right, if it means something to the giver, for the receiver to wear it if it means nothing to them.”

  He paused for a moment before he spoke.

  Then he said in a tone that was as much of a threat as the muscle jerking in his jaw, “Can I ask why in the fuck you think it means nothing to me?”

  Sonia ignored his tone too.

  She dropped her hand and snapped, “It doesn’t matter how I know, I just know. Now give me my ring!”

  She watched his body grow taut before he stated, “You’ve got about two seconds, baby doll, to tell me what the fuck you’re on about.”

  Something broke inside her and the pain was excruciating.

  Because of that she leaned forward and hissed, “Don’t call me baby doll.”

  And the
second the words were out of her mouth, she saw it, clear as if she was an inch away.

  His eyes instantly turned golden.

  And he started toward her.

  Sonia was alert enough to retreat.

  “Two seconds are up,” he growled as he stalked her.

  She was still throwing caution to the wind in the frightening face of his mirrored fury. She might have been alert enough to retreat but she was definitely not going to back down.

  “I didn’t know your kind existed,” she threw at him. “But you knew about humans. You knew what wedding rings were.”

  “And?” he clipped.

  She stopped retreating, braced and shouted, “So I had an excuse when I started to take off my claiming chain! I didn’t know what it was!” She jabbed her finger at him as he stilled his progress and stared at her. “But you knew what a wedding ring was and you took it off just the same!”

  His head jerked slightly, his face cleared of his fury and he murmured, “Honey.”

  “Don’t call me that either,” Sonia snapped. “This charade is over. You don’t like blondes? Great. Fine. Whatever. Consider your duty served, Callum. In public, if your people want me, I’ll be their queen. My parents wanted that. It’s my destiny. Even I feel it, though I don’t want to. But in private, it’s over. I’m done. If you aren’t okay with that, that’s good too. I’ll just go home.”

  Sonia thought that was pretty good. However, when she focused on Callum and not what she was saying she saw he was grinning.

  Yes, grinning.

  He was such an arrogant bastard!

  Then he asked calmly, “What makes you say I don’t like blondes?”

  Sonia gaped at him.

  Was he mad?

  “That crazy woman said it before you sequestered her!” Sonia cried.

  He started toward her again, not stalking in the same way but definitely still stalking.

  “Baby doll,” he said with humor threading his tone, “She’s crazy.”

  Sonia started retreating again in exactly the same way as before.

  “Do you like blondes?” she queried with a bite in her tone.

  “No,” he replied honestly. Her shoulders hit tapestry and she was forced to halt at the same time she gasped at his effrontery before he finished, “Or, I should say, not until recently.”

  He got close and she tried, quickly, to move to the side to escape him.

  This failed.

  With no effort at all, his arm shot out, hooked around her waist and he pulled her in front of him, took a step forward and she was back against the tapestries, pinned there by his tall frame.

  Sonia decided she’d fight her way out of it. Not physically, she wasn’t stupid or, at least, not that stupid.

  Verbally.

  “You sequestered her,” Sonia accused.

  “I did,” he replied, gazing down at her patiently, one arm around her, the other hand coming up to curl around her neck.

  Sonia tried to yank her neck away.

  This failed too.

  She quit trying and went on, “That was cruel.”

  His eyebrows shot up. “Sequestering Mona?”

  “No,” she shot back. “Everything you did to Mona.”

  “Sonia, you don’t know what you’re talking about.” She opened her mouth to speak but his hand at her neck moved to her jaw and his thumb pressed against her lips. “But if you’d calm down a second, I’ll explain.”

  She jerked her face from his hand and then snapped, “I don’t want an explanation. You’re right, I don’t know what sequestered means. But I know you humiliated her in front of a room full of men. Then you forced her to go somewhere she didn’t want to go and she barely got a word in edgewise. There is no explanation for that.”

  Callum watched her speak with curiosity then he muttered, “Bloody hell, Ryon was right. Baby doll, have you been holding onto this for a whole fucking month?”

  “Has it only been a month?” Sonia retorted sarcastically. “It’s felt like years.”

  He studied her a moment still with that strange curiosity then he remarked musingly, “I thought this would be annoying but it isn’t. You’re pretty all the time, little one, but you’re spectacular when you’re pissed off.”

  Sonia growled and shoved at the massive wall of his chest.

  He rocked back a few inches but recovered quickly and returned to his previous position.

  “All right, Sonia, you obviously need to talk, we’ll talk,” he offered but it looked like he was fighting a smile. “Tell me what’s on your mind. All of it.”

  She stared at him in astonishment.

  He was enjoying this!

  Her vision covered with a film of red.

  She’d never been so incensed and she didn’t care that he could snap her like a twig. She shoved him again, harder this time, but he just rocked back and then came forward yet again.

  So she went back to her earlier strategy.

  “I don’t want to talk!” she yelled in his face, “There’s nothing you can say about how you treated Mona. About me being here without you even asking me if I wanted to move, wanted to leave my business, my friends, my home. There’s nothing you can say about coming back from… wherever, whisking me away, just like that, without even saying hello! There’s nothing you can say about me not having any of my clothes here, about you taking over everything, every move I make, everything I wear, everything I eat. There’s nothing you can say to explain all… things… you!”

  He was still fighting a smile when he commented, “There’s a lot there, baby doll.”

  “Stop calling me baby doll!” she shrieked.

  She barely got out the word “doll” when he bent, put a shoulder to her belly and hefted her up. She kicked out her legs and beat at his back with her fists but he didn’t notice or didn’t care. He strode nonchalantly to the bed and tossed her on it.

  Sonia instantly rolled, got up on all fours and started crawling but his hands seized her ankles and he pulled her knees out from under her, dragging her across the bed and rolling her to her back.

  She growled and went at him.

  In no time at all, he was on top of her and had her wrists pinned over her head.

  “We’ll play later, Sonia,” he informed her, his face suddenly serious but it was studiously so, as if he was being serious for her benefit but still found the situation amusing. “Now we’re going to talk.”

  Sonia gaped at him, mouth open and everything.

  He thought she wanted to play?

  He was mad.

  “We’ll start with Desdemona,” he announced and she bucked under him but his hands tightened on her wrists and he gave her a warning shake before he demanded, “Pay attention.”

  She stilled and glared at him.

  “There’s a lot of history with Mona I won’t get into,” he started to explain.

  “I gathered that,” Sonia snapped acidly.

  He watched her still obviously trying to fight back his humor. “You’ve got nothing to be jealous of, little one.”

  “I’m not jealous!” she screeched.

  He shook his head, ignored her screech and continued, “Being sequestered is not a bad thing. Your people do it as well when someone is not right and they need help. Mona, as you could tell, is not right.”

  “She just has a thing for you,” Sonia retorted.

  “Yes, she does but it’s more than that,” he returned smoothly. “She’s in a far better place than she deserves to be. For what she did, or, more to the point didn’t do, she should have been punished. Instead she’s amongst people who will try to help her sort out her head.”

  Sonia’s eyes narrowed on him and she asked scornfully, “She should have been punished just because she’s got the hots for you?”

  His painstakingly serious expression changed to genuinely serious.

  In fact, deadly serious. So deadly, one look at it made Sonia hold her breath.

  “No, Sonia,” he stated slowly
. “She should have been punished for what her inattention to her responsibilities caused. She should have been punished because what she didn’t do meant hundreds of warriors died. Hundreds on both sides. She should have been punished because what she didn’t do means I’ve spent the last three days writing letters to mates and mothers explaining that their lovers and sons died brave. Died honorably. Even though every word is fucking futile because nothing I say will ease their anguish.”

  At his words, and the depth of feeling with which he spoke them, the fight left Sonia. She felt her body relaxing under his as she felt her heart slide into her throat and tears start to prick the backs of her eyes.

  He’d been writing a lot. She saw him doing it.

  Callum had been handwriting letters to grieving mates and mothers.

  She couldn’t imagine writing hundreds of letters like that. She wouldn’t know what to say. The task was so atrocious she couldn’t ever imagine having the strength to bear it.

  But Callum did. He did it at the same time he grinned at her or took her to the village or walked with her through the snow, never once letting on that this heavy weight was bearing on his broad shoulders.

  For the first time since she met him the burden of his responsibility as king to his people struck her and it felt like she’d been seared by lightning.

  It came out of her mouth before she could stop it. It came out softly, gently, even lovingly as the tears welled in her eyes and slid out the sides.

  “My handsome wolf.”

  The instant she whispered those three words, his hands released her wrists and his forehead dropped to hers.

  Freed, her arms wrapped around him tight.

  He rolled to his side, taking her with him and curling his arms around her to hold her close.

  She realized then she was another one of his burdens. A mate he didn’t exactly want but he had all the same and it was his duty to do right by her.

  And he was attempting to do his duty, not only to his people but to her. His moments of kingliness were a part of him, ingrained. It was who he was.

  The rest of it, his tenderness and humor, was him doing the best he could with a difficult situation.

  Her destiny had brought her to him to be his queen, his people’s queen and she had a duty as well, to him, to his people. It was an awesome responsibility but it was also an honor no one but no one of her kind would have.

 

‹ Prev