by Burgy, P. J.
She was unprepared for the sudden embrace she received from a complete stranger, one of the flock descending on her with open arms.
“Welcome, welcome,” The woman said. She was older than Kara, taller, her hair short and brown. The woman hugged her a bit too tightly, oblivious to Kara's attempts to pry her off.
“Ah, thanks,” Kara said. The woman released her.
When another Purger moved in looking to greet her with arms wide open, she backed off and scurried down the hall, glancing back once. Elijah blew out his candle and turned after her. She waited for him to catch up and the two reconvened in the dining hall.
“Kara, what happened?” Elijah asked her.
“Your brother wanted me to know that he hates me, that’s what happened,” she replied, and then sighed. “Don’t worry about it. Go back to them.”
“They don’t need me right now,” he said. “Did you want to talk? We can go somewhere quiet.”
“Nothing to talk about. It’s okay, Eli. It really is.”
“They’re going to start cooking dinner soon. Did you want to grab a plate with me and sit in the greenhouse? It’s very peaceful there.” He kept looking back the way they’d come, frowning as the sound of voices grew closer. “Please?”
“Yeah. We can do that," she said.
“Good, good.” He smiled, and then visibly relaxed.
“Go tend to your flock, Eli.” She smirked and then walked off toward her room, leaving the hall. She knew he was watching her, and when she turned back, and he waved, she waved back. Then, she went to get a shower, her skin feeling prickly and uncomfortable after her encounter with Simon.
Elijah and Kara had walked upstairs together, holding their plates of food, talking idly of the people in Salvation and their sudden compulsion to hug and kiss Kara. She laughed as they stepped into the greenhouse, eager to eat her scrambled eggs, bread, and pork. They sat together on the floor near the left corner so that they could look through the glass wall and ceiling before them, the buildings in various states of decay visible in all directions. The sky would be growing dark soon, but the sun was still shining bright enough to raise a sweat on her skin while they sat and ate together.
“My brother is not perfect, but I love him all the same,” Elijah said after finishing a bite. He offered her a sad smile. “Where I have learned to look for the good in the world, Simon sees only the worst. He won’t let himself see anything else, just the evil he seeks to purge.”
“Did you ever consider that he might be, ah, mental?”
He tilted his head. “Mental? You mean crazy?”
“Yeah.” She nodded and then shoveled eggs into her mouth.
“He isn’t crazy, no. But he’s very passionate. It can look the same sometimes.” He stared down at his plate of meat and potatoes. “He takes things further than I would. He hates. It’s natural to hate, I’m not saying I’ve never felt it, but Simon lets it take control of him. We all have our flaws. Considering what he’s been through, I can’t blame him for it. Pain changes us.”
“What happened to him, to make him like that?”
“The thing same that happened to me, I suppose,” he replied.
She put her plate on the floor. “Well, what happened?”
“We saw a demon eating our sister,” he answered. “My father killed the demon and then buried her. We had to bury our sister, Hannah. Simon and I were ten years old at the time. We left that house, and father began his great work, began growing his congregation.”
“I’m so sorry.”
“Simon was never the same after that. Neither was I, but he changed in a way that I did not,” Elijah told her. “I never stopped loving my brother, even when I doubted that his actions were based in our faith. That is why father has been so hard on Simon. It is one thing to take pride in your work, but it is another thing entirely to enjoy it with malice in your heart. I hate to speak ill of my brother. I was afraid that he’d hurt you, and I, I felt myself want to hurt him.”
“I was okay. I was glad to see you, but I was okay.” She placed a hand on Elijah’s thick forearm and gave him a squeeze. When he placed his other hand on top of hers, she allowed their fingers to loosely intertwine. “I have two brothers at home. Not brothers by blood. We were all adopted by one man. Saved and taken in. My older brother, he’s a mess. I know how it is to love someone but want to punch them repeatedly in the face.”
He laughed.
“Are you happy here, Eli?”
“Am I happy?”
“Yeah. Is this where you want to be?”
“Of course. This is my home. These are my people. My family.” He studied the view of the city outside, on the other side of the glass. “Without them, I am nothing.”
“You’re something with or without other people, Eli," she said. “It’s what you make of yourself that matters, not who you’re tied to.”
“Tied to?” He smiled at her. “You talk about relationships like they’re chains, Kara.”
“Maybe they are.”
“Perhaps you just need to find the right person to chain yourself to.” He chuckled. “Someone you wouldn’t mind being stuck with.”
“I thought I had.” She watched the sky. “We were going to run off together. Steal the rover. Go live on the road. That dream died pretty hard.”
“What happened?”
“His father died and he took over their fort," she said. “And, well, after that, he and I just sort of kept going like we had a future, even though he'd already squashed that. I wasn't going to settle down, and he wasn't going to walk away from his... responsibilities. Then, a few days ago, everyone at that fort disappeared. That’s why I’m here, remember? Looking for them. Looking for him...”
“Oh.” He cleared his throat.
Her gaze drifted to her lap. “His name is Ash. We were so different, we really were. Honestly, you kind of remind me of him.”
“How so?”
“He was... kind. Trusting.” She paused. “Overly idealistic and a little naive.”
“Is that how you see me?”
She shook her head. “I don't mean it in a bad way. I just meant that the world hasn't ruined you yet. Despite everything you've seen, you still find goodness out there, and in people, somehow. You have hope. It keeps you going. I like that about you.”
“And you think that the world has ruined you, Kara?” he asked.
“I don't know. I mean, I still have hope.”
He exhaled softly. “Then maybe we're more alike than you think.”
“And that’s why I need to leave Salvation, Eli.” She turned to look at him, her fingers gripping his. “I have to go look for them. Russell is the only one who can help me, if the Wailers took them. The smart Wailers. This Meredith and her people. Russell is like them. And he knows the city.”
“You know I wish I could help you, Kara.” He clenched his jaw after he spoke. He looked to her, eyes silently imploring Kara. “On the third day, just agree to join us. It'll be a few weeks of initiation, but then, maybe we can go out and-”
“They'll be dead by then for certain.” She shook her head.
“Look, I'll be out tonight on our rounds. We go out in force, move through a block together. Let me see if I can convince father to let me take a squad of ten out to see if there's any sign of your friends. How about that?” he asked her.
“You would do that for me?”
He nodded. “I would. No question.”
“Do you all go out at night?” she asked.
“Most of us do,” he answered. “We rotate. Well, not me. Not father or Simon. I don't get the luxury of a night off very often. Though, lately, I've been thinking of requesting one.”
“A night with me, eh?” She smirked at him.
“Oh, stop.” He grinned, looking to the window. “I didn't mean it like that.”
“It's okay if you did.”
He rolled his eyes, shaking his head, amused but tired. “You love another. I would never…”<
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She shrugged, giving his shoulder a push. “I'm joking.”
“I like you, Kara," he said. “I know we just met, but I do.”
“I like you too, Eli.”
“I hope I find something for you tonight,” he whispered, and Kara turned to see him scanning her face with his eyes. His tone had changed. He wasn't smiling anymore. She saw his Adam's apple move as he swallowed, his lips parted. “I know that even if you join us, you'll leave the moment you can. And I'll make sure you get away, Kara. I promise you that. When the time comes, I won't let anyone stop you. I know you don't want to be here. I know you're just waiting it out. I understand.”
“Thank you, Eli.” Kara moved in and kissed him before he could react. Her lips pressed against his, and she felt his mouth open, trying to speak. He failed, and then awkwardly returned the kiss. She pulled back and saw that he was staring at her.
“You're welcome," he said, breathless.
“I figured a friendly kiss wouldn't be against the rules.” She smiled.
“I don't think so, no.” He cleared his throat and swallowed. “I've never had one, but, probably no.”
“Was that your first kiss, Elijah?” she asked, brows knitting.
“Yes, actually,” he replied, then laughed. “Yes. Wow.”
“I hope that's okay. I didn't realize-”
“No, no, it's fine, I, I liked your friendly kiss.” He laughed again and then brought his plate with him as he stood up. He looked down at her, doing his best to regain his composure. “I've got to start getting prepared for tonight. Tomorrow morning, we can have breakfast again. If you'd like.”
“I'd like that a lot," she said.
“Well, then, good.” He backed away, but then waited for her to stand as well. “Let's get these dishes down to the kitchen, yeah? You don't need to wait up for me, unless you want to, I mean. I'll be out late, and if you're tired, please go to sleep. I can see you in the morning.”
“Sure.”
They left the greenhouse together and she smiled at the bounce in Elijah's step as they walked back to the dining hall.
Kara watched them all, surprised at the number of Purgers gathering in the dining hall. There had to be forty of fifty of them, all dressed in black and arming themselves, some already wearing their odd, bird faced masks. She stood with Elijah, watching him adjusting his gray striped frock and check on his belt to make sure his crossbow and dagger were there. He carried a flashlight similar to the one she had owned, and had a tranquilizer gun on his other hip.
“I meant to ask, what's with the mask anyway?” she asked him.
“Plague doctor.” Elijah held it up so she could see it. He let her look it over, even handing it to her for inspection. “A long time ago, they walked among the sick. They wore masks like these. Well, their's didn't have air filters. Or night vision. Or UV glass.”
“UV glass?” she asked.
“You don't want to stare at the light. You'll burn your retinas," he said.
“Finally, some science. I was getting tired of all the demons and devils.” She smirked at him and he returned the expression. “Seriously though, you guys got some impressive tech for, well, considering your doctrine, I mean.”
“You can say it. We have impressive tech for religious nuts.”
She nodded.
“That aspect of the hunt is very important,” he explained. “We are only human, after all. We can't see in the dark, or hit as hard as those things. So, we have to improvise. They get smarter, we get smarter; it's a back and forth. Like, for an example, they started trying to sneak around the blind sides of Salvation at night, so, we added more lights. Then, some of them began wearing UV protective clothing. Now we have snipers at key points with infrared goggles.”
“Aren't you afraid you'll shoot an uninfected person by accident?”
“How many uninfected people walk around in the dark all by themselves?” He raised an eyebrow at her, taking the mask back and holding it with both of his gloved hands.
“Not that many, I guess. Maybe just the creeps.” She happened to see Simon approaching and sighed. “Speaking of which.”
Simon had his mask clutched under his arm. As she had expected, he was wearing his green striped frock. He shifted his gaze between Elijah and Kara, and she noticed that in this lighting Simon's eyes were actually a very dark brown.
When he arrived to stand before them, Simon glanced back at the crowd of other Purgers first before speaking. “Come to see us off, Kara? I wouldn't have expected that, seeing as you don't approve of what we do.”
“Wonders never cease, do they?” she said. “I'm here to see Eli off, that's all.”
“Oh?” Simon grinned, meeting his brother's eyes. “Getting friendly?”
“Yes, actually,” Elijah replied. “I am being friendly. It's a skill you should learn, dear brother. I say that with all love intended.”
“I'm sure you do.” Simon nodded to Elijah.
Elijah moved up close to his brother, their faces close, and spoke softly to him. Kara strained to hear Elijah's voice. “Blessed be the man who sees his shadow and knows that it is cast by the sun, not by his spirit. You are a better man than you let on to be, brother. Please, be kind to our guest.”
Simon whispered back, “Your guest.”
“Please,” Elijah said, a bit louder.
Kara shook her head, and then saw that the other Purgers were beginning to funnel through the front doors, called to action by a familiar voice in the front lobby. It was Father Isaac. Simon and Elijah had also heard the call and were looking off toward the direction of the double doors leading out of the dining hall. Simon checked his belt quickly and produced a large ring with an assortment of keys hanging from it. She noted how the metal gleamed dully in the light.
“Eli. Be careful,” she said.
She was aware of the fact that Simon was staring as she and Eli shared a hug. As soon as Elijah stepped away from her, fastening his mask to his face and raising his dark hood, Simon turned as if to follow after his brother. Instead, when Elijah reached the door, Simon moved back to Kara and narrowed his eyes at her.
“Kara,” Simon said.
“Yeah?”
“Your thing in the basement. I tried to get him to tell me that he loved you, but I couldn't. I'm sorry. I did try,” Simon told her, his smile lacking mirth. “I just wanted to know if they could love.”
She scowled. “What?”
“He was very weak though afterwards. I was afraid he would die before the cleansing ritual was over. He will make it. I made sure of that,” Simon said. “After our...scuffle earlier, I was upset. Elijah seems intent on bringing you over, and if he does, then I will need to accept you. If he doesn't, and I have to end you, he will wish me to do it as quickly as possible, mercifully. In either case, I do need your apology.”
“My apology?” She gawked at him.
“Yes.”
“For what, exactly?”
He smiled. “For being so rude to me.”
She leaned toward him. “Fuck off.”
Simon grinned. “That's what I thought. No wonder my brother likes you.”
With that, Simon stalked off, putting on his mask and raising his hood. The Purgers followed after him into the lobby, and she watched as he unlocked the front doors. The guards let them out in a single line and they quickly disappeared into the darkness, their UV lights already shining along with their red flashlights.
One of the guards made an aggressive sound at her, shooing her away from the lobby. She muttered to herself and wandered back to the dining hall. She turned her attention to the closed elevator, but by the time she reached it a man and a woman had entered the dining hall. They were chatting, pausing only to look at Kara before continuing their conversation. She walked toward the hall and made a quick jog to the nearest stairwell.
In the stairwell, the steps leading down were blocked by a series of chains and fences. Those would have taken her to the landing leading
to the hall of generators, and to the door at the end of that hall leading down to the cleansing rooms, down to Russell. She knew that there would be no way to squeeze through all of that metal mesh and steel bars, it was far too dense and snug. Instead, she stepped out into the hall on the second floor and peered back and forth.
It was empty, most of the Purgers out for the evening in the hunting party. The ones who remained were most likely in their rooms, or perhaps on guard. Right now though, she stood alone in front of the closed elevator doors on the second floor, and knew what she had to do.
She couldn't easily pry the doors apart and so she hurried downstairs again, making her way down to where the animals were kept. She found it odd that there was no one monitoring the little farm they had, other than the door being shut to keep the geese from waddling out into Salvation. She looked around until she found a small trowel and took it back with her to the second floor elevator, careful to remain undetected as she sneaked back up the steps.
Back on the second floor, she used the trowel blade to wedge between the doors. Back and forth, she inched the blade until she was able to force the doors open a little over a foot in clearance. Without the power on the elevator doors remained parted, and she stared down into the darkness of the cold, dank shaft.
She could see the grid of supports and beams on either side, but looking into the pit revealed nothing of what the bottom would be like. She might crawl down and find the top of the elevator car or find the doors sealed on the bottom floor. There might also be a guard, though she wasn't sure why a patrol would be down there in the first place considering what Eli had told her. She slid the handle of the trowel into her pants, needing it for the job at the bottom.
She slipped into the elevator shaft, carefully grasped at the grid of support beams on the right, and began to work her way down. Her feet searched in the darkness below her for each support beam until she figured out the pattern. It felt like a long time, though it wasn't far, before she reached the bottom. Blind in the darkness, she felt around until she found the doors. Using the shovel again, she pried them open and found herself down on the level with the generators, the sharp smell of gasoline burning her nose.