by Jade Waltz
“What would it feel like?” Panicked thoughts of accidentally fighting the intrusion—and the pain it could cause—flooded me.
I felt another soothing wave from V’dim and relaxed into it.
“Not unlike the way it feels when someone knocks on your mental barriers to begin a psi conversation. You will feel something caressing your thoughts instead of your mental shields, and it would last longer and go deeper. I expect it is probably similar to how you telepathically communicate with your nestmates—but without the familiarity of a bond thread,” Z’fir answered.
“Understand, this level of scanning is extremely intimate. Even nestqueens might not go this deep with their own nestmates—not even their Favored. We will know everything,” V’dim murmured, his turquoise eyes tracing my face as his thumbs continued to stroke my cheeks.
Closing my eyes, I took a few breaths, trying to process. I was terrified at the thought of allowing such intimacy, but it could certainly be a huge help to have the princes on my side. Perhaps they could help my voice be heard—
My whirling thoughts were cut off when V’dim’s hands slid from my face. My eyes snapped open. The princes had backed away, returning to their couch as if they knew I needed space to think.
The gesture warmed my heart and went a long way toward gaining my trust. It was incredibly thoughtful.
“How about we eat lunch first. Allow you some time to think about it?” Z’fir suggested as he opened his wristband’s screen.
“Would you like something to drink, Selena?”
I nodded to V’dim. “Yes, please.”
“What would you like?”
I smiled at him. “Surprise me.”
And just like that, the tension broke as I giggled.
“What is funny?” Z’fir questioned, looking up in perplexity.
“Just a game I’ve been playing. A way to try out all the Circuli cuisine that is foreign to me—to test whether someone can guess what I might enjoy. I was wondering what V’dim will choose.”
He chuckled and glanced at V’dim.
“And how can I join this game that has made you smile?” His emerald eyes filled with amusement.
“You can pick my lunch. Surprise me. Don’t worry, I haven’t found anything I couldn’t eat or didn’t like. So far.”
The room filled with our shared laughter.
“You are interesting, Selena. Not many would be brave enough play such games with us.” V’dim’s voice was laced with humor.
I shrugged. “That’s what everyone keeps telling me.”
V’dim walked over to the dispenser and returned with a clear glass filled with a purple, blue, and green layered drink. He handed it to me with a smile. “Tell me what you think.”
I took the drink and sipped. A rush of fruity creaminess flooded my taste buds.
“This is good.” I sighed and licked my lips. “What is it?”
“A Mystic Nightfall.” V’dim glanced at Z’fir and smiled. “So, I take it I passed your test?”
I hid my smile behind my glass. “I guess you could say that.”
The door dinged.
Z’fir stood. “That is our lunch. Now, it is my turn to see if I can pass.”
V’dim returned to the drink dispenser as Z’fir answered the door. An Ulax male pushed a cart inside, eyeing me with curiosity.
“We can handle things from here, thank you,” V’dim said.
The male nodded and left, the door closing behind him.
V’dim brought over two silver beverages and set them on the central table as Z’fir unloaded four dishes. Z’fir explained each dish to me as he slid a portion onto a plate and handed it to me.
“You know this is cheating, right?” I chuckled.
“Not if I tell you which one I ordered for you. The others are just samples of our favorites for you to try. The nut-encrusted fish dish is the one I picked for you. Tell me what you think.”
Picking up a utensil, I took a bite of the fish. The nuts gave the fish a crunchy outer layer while the inside remained moist and flaky. I closed my eyes and moaned at the exquisite taste.
I held up my hand. “Delicious! You passed.”
I took another bite and focused my attention on the princes. They sat beside one another, a few of their vines and tentacles entwined and dug into their own meals.
A few moments later, V’dim looked up and asked, “So, has anyone failed your game?”
Tilting my head to the side, I thought about it. “Kaede.”
They started, and Z’fir questioned, “What did he do?”
I smiled and chuckled again. “He didn’t choose, he copied Xylo’s choice. He cheated because he knew I already liked it”—a laugh escaped—“though he didn’t know what it reminded me of.”
They looked confused.
“How did it reminding you of something mean Kaede failed? What did it remind you of?” Z’fir asked.
Eyeing them, I hesitated, wondering what they’d think of my answer.
“Why the hesitation?” V’dim asked, bewildered. “It is just a drink.”
Smirking, I took a sip of the Mystic Nightfall. “It tasted like Xylo.”
Their mouths fell open in shock, and they stared at me.
Yep. About the reaction I’d expected. I set my drink on the table, and we ate in silence, the princes at a loss for words. I couldn’t believe I’d confessed to that. Now, they didn’t seem to know how to respond. Perhaps it was a cultural thing, and I’d just said something offensive.
I chewed at my lip a moment.
“I’m sorry if I said something offensive. I didn’t mean to ruin the mood. I shouldn’t have said anything.”
“It is fine, Selena. We did ask. We were just taken by surprise. I have never heard a nestqueen talk about their nestmate like that,” Z’fir said as he set his and V’dim’s empty plates back on the table.
“Neither have I. Do you need that drink that reminds you of him? Should I get you one?” V’dim paused. “But how do you know how he tastes? When you bit him?”
I choked. “Sure... let’s leave it at that.”
I hid behind my drink in mortification as I watched them trying to process my answer.
Z’fir changed the subject, perhaps sensing my discomfort. “Have you thought about our request?”
I had been thinking about it during our meal. There were pros and cons, but it seemed to me the potential benefits far outweighed any loss of privacy. I decided to give them a chance.
“I will trust you. Just tell me what I need to do.”
“We have obviously never tried this with a human before, so we do not know how you will react. I do not want you to fall if you get dizzy or faint, so maybe you should lie down on the couch. Close your eyes. As you lower your mental shields, we will touch you to facilitate the connection. We will let go when we finish,” Z’fir explained.
I placed my drink on the table and laid back on the loveseat. Closing my eyes, I took in a deep breath, trying to relax. I heard movement beside me, and one hand slid to cup my cheek. Another took my hand.
I cautiously lowered my mental shields and felt two cool presences glide into my mind. I relaxed. There was no pain.
As they slid against my thoughts, I felt my consciousness drift away.
Chapter Thirty
Odelm
Hostility faded to dismay as Odelm watched the lift door close, sealing Selena away from him. He could feel agitation, annoyance, and frustration as they flickered across their bond thread to him.
Odelm did not know what had possessed him.
He was rarely an aggressive person and had never provoked a fight before. He was an artist—words and music were his tools. Perhaps it had been a combination of being startled so soon after the indescribable pleasure of tasting Selena? Or maybe Xylo’s oblique warnings about Kaede last night?
It did not really matter.
What mattered was he had upset and disappointed Selena. He had to talk to her. Make things ri
ght. The sooner, the better. He hoped she could forgive him. He would not want to lose her as new as their bond was.
Would she sever their newly formed courting bond? He did not think he would survive another severing.
A grunt sounded next to him, pulling him from his thoughts. He glanced over, seeing Kaede—a look of fury in his eyes.
“I’m no threat to Selena. Get that into your head right now. You’re now bonded to her—temporary or not—so I must extend my protection to you also. But when it comes to choosing to protect you or her—or anyone on this junk of a ship—it will always be her first—even if that means protecting her from you. Your lives mean nothing to me. She does,” Kaede barked, his voice steely.
“What would she say if she heard you threaten me?” Odelm mocked, still angry.
Kaede huffed. “I’m not threatening you. I’m not your enemy. The only person you need to be mad at is yourself. I was stating the obvious.”
“And what is that?”
Kaede stepped closer, cloth drape rubbing against the side of Odelm’s face as Kaede leaned in and whispered, “I control this ship. Nothing gets past me. And I will use every bit of that control to protect Selena. From anything or anyone.”
Taken aback at the aggression, Odelm leaned away. “Then why did you allow Selena to walk away and get on the elevator without you?”
Kaede stepped back and faced him. “Even I know when someone needs privacy to process things. She is overwhelmed, and though she might not be conscious of it, her pregnancy is heightening her emotions, making it harder to think clearly.” Kaede tilted his head as if in thought. “Plus, she just accepted an offer to eat lunch with the princes in their suite. Give her some time away. Let her process. Smothering her will make things worse.”
Odelm stared straight into Kaede’s visor. “Why does she mean so much to you?”
A lengthy silence fell between them, and Odelm began to wonder if Kaede would answer. Why did Kaede act so devoted to her when they had just met? It seemed odd for a hired bodyguard. Was Selena only a part of his mission? Was something else going on? Or was there more about Selena Kaede had not told them? Surely no one would expend so much effort unless it were vitally important. Maybe his client had offered a reward that was important to Kaede? Credits, freedoms, something...
It unnerved Odelm that not only were Kaede’s mental shields impenetrable, but his visor and garb made it impossible to read his expressions.
Even more worrisome—how had Kaede taken over the ship? Did the princes know?
Kaede paced a few steps away, looking tense. He halted, squaring his shoulders, and turned to face Odelm. Leaning forward, he ground out, “I’ve dedicated the last nine years of my life searching for her. I’m the one that found her. I was on the failed mission to rescue her from the Yaarkin ship, she escaped on her own. Selena is the key to major changes for the Children within CEG, but she deserves to choose her own life. I refuse to allow pompous politicians and their scientists to strip away her newly found freedom. Believe me when I say, between my client and me, we will make sure nothing harms her or her family. And like I said the other night, it would benefit Selena if you and Xylo worked with me instead of against me.”
“You love her.”
Kaede jerked back, shocked. “No! No, I’m just doing my job. The Aldawi made it my mission to protect her—and protect her I will. Know that. Decide whether you’ll work with me or against me.”
Before Odelm could respond, Kaede turned and walked away.
Odelm watched him disappear into the crowd.
Kaede had lied to him.
His senses had given him that information. The question was why did Kaede deny his feelings? Was he even aware of them?
Odelm made his way to the café alone. He didn’t have much time left for lunch before his performance, but he would grab a quick bite.
“Peacocking?” Xylo’s deep mental voice questioned as he sat down at the bar.
Clearly Xylo had heard some of what had occurred—or had talked to Selena.
“I almost got into a fight with Kaede. Selena said we were peacocking,” Odelm explained as he ordered his lunch.
He was not particularly hungry anymore—Selena’s disappointment weighed on him—but he knew he should eat. Performing on an empty stomach would be unwise.
“Why did you do that? He is her Head of Security. I thought we had come to an agreement last night?”
“I do not know, Xylo. Something aroused my protective instincts when he surprised me. His attitude just amped that protective streak. I have never reacted that way in my life...”
“I get it. I have had similar reactions to Kaede, and I am still trying to figure out why. But fix it. Soon. I am getting mixed thoughts from her that are distracting me from my work. She does not need any added stress right now. It could be detrimental to her health.”
The bartender delivered Odelm’s order, and he ate his lunch in silence. Selena was supposed to be here. He had prepared a piece to play for her—to express how she made him feel.
Now, for the first time in his life, Odelm had no desire to play music. The earlier argument unsettled him. He was worried about losing Selena and their fledgling bond. He didn’t feel like expressing himself to the world.
Odelm finished his hasty meal and went to the stage to uncover his Ulepo and begin his performance. But it was a rote performance, his hands and tentacles moving along the keys on autopilot as he checked out. Closing his eyes, he focused on the faint golden thread that connected him to Selena. He took in a deep breath and sought out her emotions along the bond.
To his surprise, he felt happiness coming down the bond. It instantly lifted his melancholy mood. Hope filled him. Perhaps she would be willing to accept his apology.
His mood lightened, and he dove into his music. The tempo brightened as the music matched his lifted spirits. He smiled in enjoyment.
Performing music was what he lived for.
Time sped by, and before he knew it, his time slot was over.
He covered the Ulepo and glanced at Selena’s favorite booth, hoping to see her. While both Kaede and Xylo sat at the booth, Selena was nowhere to be found.
He walked over and sat down next to his nestbrother.
“Where is Selena?”
Xylo got a faraway look in his eyes as Kaede answered, “She is still with the princes in the Royal Suite.”
“I thought she was supposed to be here.”
“Are you two going to solve whatever is going on between you before she does get here?” Xylo said, eyeing them both.
Odelm sensed Xylo was disappointed in him.
Odelm turned to Kaede in apology and looked into his visor. “I am sorry about earlier. I understand where you are coming from and agree.”
“That is it?” Xylo questioned in disbelief.
“We had a discussion earlier and worked things out. All three of us want the best for Selena. It’s best if we work together,” Kaede said, dismissing the issue. He returned to tapping at his armband.
A disorienting wave hit Odelm, and he tipped over onto the table. A groan sounded next to him, and he rolled his head on the tabletop to look. Xylo lay on the table next to him, his eyes closed and his face pale.
“What’s wrong? What’s happening?” Kaede barked as he leapt to his feet and looked at them in concern.
Xylo opened his eyes and looked at Odelm. He looked stunned as he moaned again in agony.
But Odelm had felt this before. This disconnect. The hollow feeling that had been his constant companion for years had returned.
The feeling of a severed courting bond.
“Selena. Something has happened to Selena.”
Chapter Thirty-One
Selena
The familiar tropical paradise of my dreamscape surrounded me.
Bright yellow sun. Bright blue sky. Vibrant and colorful plant life. The sound of the lilac waves crashing onto the white sand beach below my villa. The sea breeze blew
my silver hair across my face as I sat on the porch railing, hugging my legs.
I felt two strong essences appear beside me.
“Selena?” V’dim asked in shock.
“Is this what I think it is?”
I smiled, delighted to share my dreamscape with someone else. I gestured expansively, encompassing the entire island.
“Welcome to my dreamscape. I’m assuming this isn’t normal, and something went wrong when you entered my memories.”
I turned to face them.
They were looking at their surroundings, their faces a mixture of awe and disbelief.
I gave them a few moments to absorb everything, then repeated, “So, what happened?”
Z’fir stepped up beside me and leaned over the railing, looking at the island spread out below. “One moment we were searching through your memories, the next we woke up here.”
I looked down at my feet and wiggled my toes as I wondered what exactly they’d seen. Somehow, having the princes in my dreamscape seemed more intimate than allowing them into my mind though I wasn’t sure why.
Peering up at them, I finally asked, “So, what did you see?”
Z’fir turned and set his back against the railing, glancing at V’dim. “We saw everything.”
“Some horrible things. Some things I wish I could unsee. Little good. I feel traumatized just witnessing it.” V’dim sighed. “Selena, how did you survive everything we witnessed? And how are you able to lock it away so completely, to remain such a compassionate and kind person?”
I gave him a sad smile. “This place. Every night I came here to escape. It was my one respite from the monotony and cruelty of my daily life. I don’t think I would have survived at all without it.”
I looked around my island, allowing the serenity of the scene to leech away the pain his words dredged up.
“Do you know what this is, Selena? This place?”