by Jade Waltz
I’d never seen Xylo like this before. Was this a side of him he kept hidden? Was this the real Xylo?
I shrank further into myself and closed my eyes, waiting for the blow.
“Xylo. She is terrified. This is your jealousy talking. Feel her. You are scaring her,” Odelm snapped.
I turned and buried my face in Odelm’s side, struggling to breathe. He wrapped his arm around me, holding me close. A sob escaped as I wrapped one arm around his chest, holding my stomach with the other.
The weight of the events of the day finally hit me.
It was too much.
I closed my eyes and sucked in a deep breath, filling my lungs with Odelm’s comforting, slightly sweet, musty scent. I held my breath, soaking in his unique fragrance and willed myself to calm down. I felt Odelm trying to balance my emotions across our bond, but since his own feelings were unsettled, he wasn’t as successful as he usually was.
The feeling of two appendages snaking around my legs broke me from my absorption, and I looked down to see what was touching me. Xylo’s vines. He knelt on the floor by my feet with a horrified look on his face. His hands hovered above my legs, shaking.
I turned to face him, dragging my hands across my eyes to clear the tears. Xylo’s eyes were sorrowful, full of regret as he searched my own.
“Selena…” he choked out, voice thick with emotion. “The things you were thinking... I would never...” He swallowed hard and started again. “I am sorry. I did not mean to yell at you. What I experienced earlier today while you were unconscious is something I hope never to experience ever again. You terrified me. When we found you unresponsive on their couch—with them collapsed beside you—I feared the worst.
“And after learning what had happened, what they had done... what you had allowed”—he swallowed again—“I was overwhelmed by so many conflicting emotions, I am still trying to sort them out. Rage they asked this of you when you are not a criminal, when you are pregnant and an unfamiliar species. Lingering pain from the feeling of the severed bond we suffered the entire time you were unconscious. I have no idea how Odelm managed all these years, frankly. Jealousy because that is something so personal—so intimate—that it is usually not done. And if it is, only a few nestmates experience it with their nestqueens. I felt robbed. Inadequate.”
Tears were once more streaming down my face, and I pressed my hands to my mouth to silence the sobs.
“Why did two males—both princes—get to experience something with you that you did not offer to share with me, your only permanently bonded nestmate? The one who has been with you since you woke up? Or Odelm? Who has always been there for you, even before you court-bonded?”
With my emotions riding me so hard, I couldn’t find the words to ease him, to explain. So instead, I leaned forward and cradled Xylo’s face in my hands, pressing my forehead to his. I focused on lowering my barriers and pouring my thoughts and emotions into my bond with each of them.
I looked deep into Xylo’s eyes before closing mine and tracing his soft lips with my own. I fell into the kiss. Odelm’s arms crept around my stomach as Xylo’s hands slid into my hair, pulling me closer to deepen the kiss.
My pulse quickened from my nestmates’ touches.
Pulling back just enough to bite his bottom lip, tasting his downy fuzz, I licked along the seam of his mouth. He sighed and opened to my questing tongue. A moan escaped me as I savored his sweet herbal taste. I lapped at the inside of his mouth, his tongue entangling with my own. I gave myself over to him, wanting to show him how I felt.
I felt Odelm slide his hands away, then the blanket was pulled free. Cool air hit my bare legs. His hand gripped my foot, working its way up my leg, and I moaned at the teasing caress.
I dragged myself away from Xylo’s mouth with an effort, panting, and focused on the exquisite sensations as Odelm’s hand journeyed up my leg. My arousal spiked, and I could feel my center getting slick with my essence.
Opening my eyes, I met Xylo’s pupilless teal ones, needing him to understand. Willing him to understand. “Xylo—”
“I know Selena. I read it. I felt it,” Xylo whispered.
Odelm’s hand froze at my knee—as if he knew how vital it was to me to speak, to resolve things with Xylo.
“I am sorry, Xylo. I never meant to hurt you. Either of you.”
“There is nothing to be sorry for. I understand now. I see what happened. But... please. Do not do that to us again?” Xylo breathed against my lips, tickling as he spoke.
“Once my cubs are born”—I hesitated, not wanting them to think I was pushing—“maybe we could try it? The three of us? I’d like to show you... if you wanted to, I mean...”
Xylo turned to meet Odelm’s gaze beside me, then looked back at me.
“I would like that, but only if you are willing.”
“I am. I hadn’t known it was possible, Xylo. I never knew I could do that. But I want to share that with you,” I murmured, turning to Odelm as Xylo’s hands released my hair. “With you both.”
I watched Odelm, trying to gauge his reaction as his gaze darted between Xylo and me. Finally, he responded, and I could hear the hope in his voice.
“Does that mean that you will accept my bonding spore soon?”
Of course, he wanted a permanent bond, probably now more than ever. I knew today had triggered bad memories for him. Having felt his panic at nearly losing me and how closely his trauma mirrored Xylo’s, I realized how much I mattered to him already.
He deserved this. And he deserved the security of knowing we were bonded—that I would not reject him.
I smiled. “Yes. How about now?”
His eyes widened in shock as his hand gripped my knee tighter. “Truly?”
I looked over at Xylo, “If that is—”
“I will claim my right as your nestmate to watch.”
“What?” I choked.
“Nestmates not copulating with their nestqueen are allowed to watch. They can aid in her pleasure if the nestbrother fails to bring her to completion. It is the chosen nestmate’s chance to prove to his fellow nestbrothers he can satisfy their nestqueen, that he is worthy to sire her next batch of offspring,” Odelm explained.
“But I am not ovulating. Umm... not in heat.”
“No, but the nestqueen accepting our bonding spore is similar. Once you accept our bonding spore, our bodies sync with yours biologically, producing our seed when you start ovulating. We only have that one chance to breed with you during that heat-cycle. Once we either perform or your heat-cycle is over, we are not able to perform until the next,” Xylo stated matter-of-factly.
“So, you can’t have sex with me until I am ovulating?” I blinked in disbelief.
“Correct. It is biologically impossible.”
I tilted my head in question. “Is that why we haven’t had sex since I accepted your bonding spore?”
He nodded with a smile. “Yes. Even though I am not able to perform for you, your aroused thoughts and smells make it impossible to deny you the relief you need. And I derive great pleasure from your pleasure.” He chuckled again. “I have read humans are capable of sex any time—that they delight in it—and I’ve studied how pregnancy hormones can affect human females, heightening that need. Giving you the pleasure you need... not only do I experience your bliss across our bond thread, but your essence is addicting.”
“Truly, Xylo?” Odelm asked, awed. “Even more than the taste of her skin after swimming?”
Xylo closed his eyes, nodding. “It is like drinking your favorite drink after a long day. Like having a glass of water after being without in the hot sun. It is a reward I will look forward to claiming whenever she needs it.”
“So, you are saying you won’t have any sex drive until I am ovulating? That you only please me when I am aroused to sample me after I have climaxed?” I asked in disbelief, struggling to come to terms with this bombshell.
Opening his eyes and locking his heated gaze with mine, Xylo rep
lied, “Yes. We revert to our pre-courting bond state. The court bond awakens our sexuality so we can give our bonding spore to our nestqueen. Once that happens, we have no sex drive until our nestqueen’s body signals she is in her heat-cycle. Which comes once every five years or so. Our species only copulate to create offspring. That is it. Outside of accepting the bonding spore and procreation, we are biologically unable to perform.”
“So, only once a moon—”
Odelm interrupted, “A moon?!” He turned to Xylo, eyes enormous. “She enters her heat-cycle every moon?”
Xylo burst into laughter. “Yes. Every moon.”
Odelm’s turned back to me, mouth open in disbelief.
I rolled my eyes. Surprises all around, I guess.
“Okay, now I get a bit better why Circuli treat your offspring the way you do,” I said, looking at Xylo with a smirk.
“Selena.” Odelm’s voice drew my gaze. He searched my face before locking his pale green eyes on mine. “Were you serious about accepting my bonding spore right now?”
A rush of arousal threatened to drown me at his words. Thoughts of both of them together in my nestbed...
I swallowed, hard.
Xylo chuckled. “From her thoughts, I would say she was.”
I gasped and shoved Xylo in outrage; he landed on his ass with a laugh.
“Stay out of my head.”
He grinned as his eyes twinkled with mischief. “I cannot. I will not.”
Growling, I slid my legs off Odelm’s and stood. I grabbed his hand and pulled him to our bedroom, Xylo’s laughter floating on the air behind us. Releasing his hand, I shucked my clothes and wristband, dropping them on the couch.
I turned, hands on hips, to see Odelm and Xylo standing side-by-side between the couch and the nestbed. Xylo held a silver drink in one hand and looked between Odelm and me, his eyes lit with laughter. Clearly, he was having a good chuckle at our expense. I was about to have at him, when I happened to glance at Odelm.
As our eyes met, I saw the wonder on his face—as if I were the only thing in the room. I sobered instantly. I knew how critical this moment was for him. He had been deprived of this once, when his first nestqueen had forced him to choose between his music and her. This was his second chance. Looking into Odelm’s pale green eyes, I saw how much he yearned for this—for me.
Odelm deserved more.
Ignoring Xylo’s ridiculousness, I reached for Odelm’s hand. Never breaking eye contact, I tugged him with me to the center of the nestbed.
I hesitated, suddenly unsure. Reaching up, I cupped his cheek. He closed his eyes and leaned into my hand with a sigh.
“Odelm. I didn’t ask you before I triggered our court bond. I didn’t give you a choice. Before we go any further, I need you to tell me you want this. That you want to have a permanent bond with me. That you want me.”
A deep hunger filled Odelm’s eyes, thrilling me. An answering thrum of arousal heated my core. No one had ever looked at me as he was—as if he not only wanted me but needed me, as if I were the center of his world, and once I accepted his bonding spore, I would be forever his. That thought sent a shiver through me, reawakening needs I had long since buried.
“Selena.” His voice vibrated through me. “You have pulled me from my isolation, given me hope that it was possible to be accepted for who I am. Without being forced to sacrifice a part of me. What you have given me goes well beyond what I had ever envisioned possible for a nestmate and his nestqueen. I want nothing more than to give you my bonding spore—to experience our souls touching for the first time as we join. My wish is for you to fully accept me. You are more than I could have ever hoped for as my nestqueen.”
My mouth opened, then hung there, at a total loss for words. So many conflicting emotions. I wanted to weep with joy and hold him, show him how much his heartfelt confession meant. My core heated, my center throbbing with need at the thought of making him mine. Desire hit me at full force.
The latter won.
Stepping into him, my bronze hands a beautiful contrast to his violet scales as they traced up his chest and hooked around the back of his neck, I leaned into him. Rising on my tiptoes, tugging his head to mine, I slanted my lips across his and kissed him. He stiffened for a moment, then slid his hands to my hips.
I pulled my head back to look up at him. Keeping contact with his pale green eyes, my hands skimmed back to his chest, and I pushed, guiding him to the low wall that ringed the center of the nestbed.
“How do we do this?” I purred.
Odelm looked uncertainly behind me at Xylo.
“With your pregnancy, I think the same position we used would be best,” Xylo replied.
I grinned wickedly and pushed against Odelm’s chest. “Sit.”
He returned his hungry gaze to me, a small smile playing about his lips as he unwrapped his tentacles from his torso. He sat, leaning against the cushioned wall, his legs stretched out before him.
I stood a moment, simply appreciating the stunning picture he made. His cool-violet-scaled body popped against the black sheets and dark blue pillows of the nestbed. The multi-hued violet speckling on his scales shimmered with iridescence under the lights. His arm and thigh blades—edged in a violet so pale, it was nearly white—looked dangerously lethal. His tentacles ombréd to the same almost-white violet at their tips that glistened as if wet.
A purr rumbled within me as I lowered myself onto his lap, legs on either side of his hips. I shifted on the seat formed by the smooth central part of his thigh fins, carefully avoiding the dangerous edges. The coolness from his scales did little to quench the heat radiating from me.
I could feel the weight of Xylo’s gaze on my back. The thought of him watching thrilled me, heightening my arousal. His support of Odelm as a nestbrother eased any fear of jealousy I’d had. The three of us were kindred spirits, and I basked in the warmth of their understanding and care.
Leaning forward, I caressed Odelm’s cheeks, looking into his heated green eyes. He cupped my buttocks, his hands kneading. His fingers brushed the crease between my thighs and my ass, sliding closer to my nether lips, heightening my awareness of the dripping hunger between my legs. My nipples peaked from arousal as they rubbed against his ridged scales. I moaned. They were so sensitive these days, the cool textured friction rode the edge of pain, driving me crazy.
My purrs intensified as my lips grazed his mouth slit, sliding across his delicate facial scales as I kissed him. The intimate touch awoke something deep within me, and I growled, sliding my hands into his violet ombre hair. I gripped, tugging hard at his anemone strands.
He gasped.
My tongue dove in, slipping past two rows of sharp teeth to tangle with his long, thin tongue. I growled again as I played my tongue along his, and he moaned. The three-fingered hand I’d seen at the end of his tongue stroked along mine, making me shiver. I felt it grasp the end of my tongue, holding it still as my mouth flooded with a sweet-salty essence that wreaked havoc on my senses.
I cried out as my tongue tingled, the sensation crawling in a wave of heat and sensation down my throat. He clutched my ass tighter as his tentacles slid around my thighs, drawing our pelvises closer together. His tentacles wrapped around my thighs, holding them apart, the tips leaving a tingling trail in their wake as the glistening moisture I’d seen earlier coated my skin.
I closed my eyes, breathing hard as I felt all four tips reach my nether lips. They traced my folds, spreading both my own wetness and his intoxicating essence. As the tingling spread through my center, Odelm moaned.
I opened my eyes as his tongue released mine. He leaned his head back against the cushioned wall, his breathing harsh, his eyes closed. I slid my hands down his neck to grip his shoulders.
Unable to resist, I leaned forward to trace his neck with my lips, trailing kisses along his shoulder, then back to the tender spot where his neck and shoulder joined. My arousal peaked, and I ached to bite him. I controlled my impulse, instead kis
sing the underside of his jaw.
Odelm groaned in response. His tentacles moved faster along my nether lips as his hands kneaded my buttocks aggressively.
I writhed against him, nibbling back down the side of his neck. Odelm’s whole body jerked, and his pale green eyes flew open, heavy-lidded as he watched my teeth tracing the side of his neck.
His tentacles slid away from my center, once more wrapping around my thighs, and I whined in protest. He shifted beneath me, and I felt something new rubbing against me.
Two smaller, thinner tentacles writhed against my center as if seeking entrance. My eyes fluttered closed as one of them entered me. I moaned as it pushed deeper, rubbing against my walls as if searching for the end. The sensations felt oddly erotic. Its coolness compared to my burning heat enabled me to feel every spot it touched in exquisite detail. It was smooth and sleek, different than anything I had felt before. Once it hit the end of my tunnel, it stilled though the other small tentacle continued to writhe against my nether lips, occasionally brushing against my clit.
I whined again in protest and confusion.
Before I even thought to move, the reason his questing appendage had stilled became clear. The second smaller, thinner tentacle slid south, coating itself in our wet arousal. It stilled right outside my rosebud as Odelm sensed the spike in my fear when I realized where it was going. I stiffened against him and prepared to pull away.
“Selena. Ulax male genitalia is not like the Aldawi. There are no barbs or spikes. It will not hurt. There is nothing to worry about,” Xylo coaxed from across the nestbed.
I turned my head to look at him. He leaned against the wall, his teal eyes focused on me, his empty glass on the table beside him.
“Promise?”
His gaze softened. “I would not lie to you. Odelm would never hurt you.”
Odelm’s hand released my buttock, and he cupped my face, pulling my gaze back to him. “Selena, I promise I will never hurt you. If you do not want my secondary penis to enter you, it will not.”
I closed my eyes and took in a deep breath, releasing it slowly. Nodding my head, I opened my eyes and met his gaze as I whispered, “I trust you. But if it hurts, promise you’ll stop?”