by Eve Kaan
The client replied through a cynical smile, 'That's the kind of girl I like. Come on, cupcake, while my throat hasn't dried up completely.' Distancing myself, I heard her comment behind my back, 'I truly love when Yoshiwara gives us such surprises. They finally freshened up a little the circling group of girls, this one is mine tonight.'
She already drank too much, by the time I would bring sake back to her, she won't even remember my existence anymore, so I gave myself a little extra time by hiding in crowded groups. I used this concourse to break into a targeted conversation.
On the futon beside the elevation for dance is sitting a girl with the instrument in her arms, and beside her, the three ladies in extremely expensive kimonos are settled. They enjoyed sharing the pipe from which an odd smell is spreading out. I can't recognize it, but I'm sure tobacco is not in question. There's only one girl of the night with them. She is laughing on everything a woman with a bag full of golden coins would say. The black-eyed lady ended the sentence, '... you just need to pay them a tip - for the first time, but after they're going for the full price.' The pipe arrived at me. I smiled and just transmitted it further. Guest on my left side, covered in red kimono, looked at me all surprised, 'And who is this young girl? From a fine house, I see - when she barely touched the pipe.' Everyone laughed at her comment.
I quickly responded, 'What kind of a night girl would that make me, if I was to allow for my ladies to notice an unpleasant aftertaste that pipe surely would have left behind.'
A black-eyed client applauded, 'I really like her. I've noticed her on some past events, she has the finest skills indeed. But I must acknowledge the brilliant answer, and whom do we have the pleasure of sharing this evening with?'
She appealed on my name. I answered through a smile easily like a feather fall. It didn't take me long to charm them, though I think the pipe also contributed to that. In the background, I heard Gina approaching us by welcoming a black-eyed lady as if she had already met her. She sat beside the client. They started talking, hiding words in a whisper from hearing. It seemed to me that I had read my name on their lips, but I wasn't sure until the black-eyed lady turned, 'Oh, that's how it is then. I hear that Gina is extremely pleased with your special skills - as she says, so here Uta, despite the fact I didn't try you yet I trust my friend's word, as she has used you in several occasions.' With a smile, Gina encouraged her to continue this conversation. 'I have a suggestion for you if you are interested in additional golden coins?' Of course, I answered affirmatively. 'Even if it goes far beyond Yoshiwara's rules?' With a raised eyebrow and a perspicacious tone, she questioned her grounds about my working ethics.
I selected the exact words she wanted to hear from my mouth, then replied, 'And to which girl the golden coins are not more important than some traditional rules!?'
She looked at Gina and concluded in satisfaction, 'I like her Gina. I really like this girl of yours a lot.' She turned to me, pointing at me the kind of smile that's saying she wanted to try me. 'Every fifteenth moon alternation I have an event with the girls in my house, behind Yoshiwara's female part borders. Next will be in ten nights,' she waited a few moments to examine my reaction before she continued, 'you will get a list of participating girls, for them you will tell Mothers that you arranged an afternoon tea with the latest news of your streets. The carriage will arrive in a small street behind the Great House right at the time after lunch. Don't worry, until dinner time you will be back. I'll make sure you get a list before the last day.'
I noticed a surprise on Gina's face. She obviously didn't know about this before. This woman is selling the girls in her house, and she's coming here to pick them up. I kindly showed my gratitude by accepting the offer. She made it clear to me that I would spend that afternoon in her hands. Fortunately, Nori came just at the right time to take me away.
I told Rin everything as soon as I saw her, and she came to me with an event under the masks she found out about. She is not upset, only helpless-looking while lighting a cigarette of silver edge. 'I can't do this anymore, everything in Yoshiwara is falling apart since I arrived. I haven't even decided what I'm going to do with the field, or those girls who have left with guests in privacy from that event in the other part of Yoshiwara without permission, and now, new issues are already at my step. It's a chain, obviously without an end.' She paced throughout the room all upset now. 'I've had enough.'
'You need to calm down Rin. Situations are best solved one step at a time. Each problem has already existed in Yoshiwara even before your arrival, that's not your fault.' I tried to be positive, hoping that my support will comfort her.
''Where do I start?' She sighed tiredly.
'First of all, come to me, and you'll find out.' With a smile, I encouraged her. The cigarette barely touched the astray when I pulled her into my arms. 'There - Respected lady, you've solved the first problem which was burdening your shoulders.' I whispered softly, 'You will untangle all the problems, you are a capable woman. I believe in you.' I caressed her face while she's lying beside me with closed eyes.
'I was thinking of releasing the field manager and temporarily putting Gina and Nori on supervising - if the two of them would agree to it, just until I find the person I would permanently station there.' She opened her beautiful warm eyes. 'Sorry Yuna, I don't want to ruin this short time we have for us tonight.'
'Rin, how can you even think you're spoiling our night. It would be ruined if I were to leave you in such a state. I think your idea with the field is great, only if Gina and Nori agree of course. You don't have to send them for long stays, it's probably enough to go check out the business once in a while. There are not many goods left after the flood anyway.'
'You are right, they would like your idea much better.' Tracing her hands slowly down my neck all the way to the chest, she started to awake the passion.
'Your heart beats so fast Yuna.'
'Because you're here.' With each thump, I'm experiencing a thrill of emotions, they are overwhelming me beyond the limits of sanity. 'I don't want to be separated from you. - Rin.' She looked at me long and tender. 'I want us to talk about everything, tell me what's on your soul? I will try to advise you or at least listen. For tenderness, we have time for the rest of our lives. Now, only your sincere smile is important to me.'
'I'm worried about Yoshiwara's other part. What kind of event is that? All those girls. I can't punish half of Yoshiwara's population, and besides that, he is trying to take over my clientele.' Rin continued to analyze the situations, which she caught herself in. We spent the rest of evening embracing each other. Of course, the subject of Utano surfaced at some point. I couldn't help myself when we were already complaining about our bitter problems.
Just before dawn, Rin said something I wasn't expecting, 'Nothing in my life is more important than you Yuna, I need you. I can't bear to see you leave, waiting for the next event to come... Come to me tomorrow?'
'Aaand, what do you mean by to you ?'
'Do you want to come to my actual house - we are free for the next three days, until the next event. Yuna I can't be without you for that long.' I was overwhelmed with euphoria. Every night spent without her, for me, is filled with longing.
'Of course, I want to come, how would I not. And your servants?' Rin found herself being hugged suddenly, and honestly, I think she didn't expect anything less than that.
'I'll send a carriage for you, in the evening after you rest and pack yourself.' she whispered in my ear with a warm smile, but who would wait till the evening – I'm impatient already.
'I'll be rested after lunch.' I retorted, flushing immediately.
'The carriage will arrive after lunch then. I'll give the servants those three days off. Everyone needs some free time, isn't that right Yuna?' She gazed at me with the same look she had the night we made love. I gave her a pack on the lips, praising her glorious idea afterward. I wouldn't have thought it better myself. We parted ways with a lot of small kisses, Rin barely managing to sneak
out of the room, having stayed till the last moment.
✽✽✽
I couldn't wait for Rin's carriage to arrive, I packed up immediately. Mother was thrilled while walking around the house, saying that she sees a chance for matronage there when Gina fancies me this much. Utano still behaved as if she had lost her mind, that look - lost in the distance. She paced along with Mother, sharing the enthusiasm as if she believes that I would spend these three days with Gina.
Kaoru couldn't bear hearing the matron word, each time it popped out just rising her nose up in the sky. Hana was constantly nudging her to stop acting like that.
Before lunch, Kaoru knocked on my door. She hesitated at first, then checked out the hall, making sure no one is listening in front of the door, then approached me.
Finally, after a long time, Kaoru behaved without her masks. 'Uta, you know how much you mean to me. You're almost like my sister.' she took my hand, 'This is between us. You are a woman now, and I know that Utano is a bit hard on some issues. Honey, this is a cruel world, you have to fight for yourself to survive.' She looked away, 'My matron story is only a false hope,' she paused briefly, and sadly continued, 'in fact, at first I truly believed, but they are all the same,' she looked back into my eyes, 'on the other hand, we have to spread stories like that to the public, hoping the information would tempt other client's interest. Fortunately, all the girls support huge false stories. You see Uta when clients hear that your potential matron is around you - you just wouldn't believe it, all that other ladies immediately renew their interest towards your art.'
I'm still not sure what kind of advice she's trying to give me, but I'm happy because she cares this much to help me with thoughts. 'But in any case. That Gina has a longstanding interest, it wouldn't hurt you to show her more affection. Let's say, lead her to think that you feel something more. I know that Utano is strictly opposed to it. She would never give you that kind of advice, but you know that's some other story.' She continued quietly in confidence, 'That's the way to get a real chance in the matron matter. And love Uta - we're not built of stone. You seduce a client with such thought a little bit, maybe you'll really fall in love. That would be the best option, after all. In fact, it would be best if she fells in love with you, then you've done the job right.' She released my hands to sit on the futon.
I didn't say anything to her, I'm glad to see that she's trying to show that she cares about my future, I really appreciate it. She had a few more tips to share. 'I fell in love a few times, of course, even with the clients as well. But all that love is condemned to failure if they don't become your matrons, so be careful with your heart, and with the other girls too. Our girls. Love is unsustainable in that case, yet jealousy is stronger than sanity. The nature of our profession can't be helped - we need to pay the debt - well, you know it yourself, and the tips are – well, what to say... And besides that, we can't walk in the same old friable kimonos all the time.'
I didn't know Kaoru is that soft-hearted. We never talked about such topics - not even in a laughing manner with the cup of sake. 'Kaoru, thank you for your advice. I appreciate the sincerity. I'm very sorry for your unfortunate feelings. And I hope you will find true happiness.'
I noticed that she was getting sad. 'Thank you Uta. Ah, that love, you know it's forbidden subject in Yoshiwara, but still exists, let's not hide it. Just so you know, if it happens to you - I'm here, you're not alone. Be gentle with Gina, make her feel. There is no stronger weapon than love.'
I have heard her countless of times as she released the sound of a broken heart in her room. I hugged Kaoru before we went for lunch together.
Hana pulled out a small napkin at the table with needlework in my initials, 'Uta, I was saving especially for it. Take it. I commissioned this for you. A little token from me, as you're a woman now. Kaoru gave me the same sign of gentle gesture to comfort me when I'm away from home.' The heat was clattering around my heart. 'This is your first long trip, so if you feel down - to know that we are with you and you're coming back soon.'
I stood up, approaching Hana, taking a napkin with a tear that escaped from my eyes because of her thoughtfulness. They are wonderful towards me, yet I lie to them all. Guilt seized me in several moments throughout the lunch, but I quickly calmed. I can't live with this guilt for the rest of my life. They will understand my lie, soon when Yoshiwara finds out that I'm committed only to one woman.
A sharp thought snapped me suddenly, like a storm when the sky slashes into a thousand parts. What will be with us after all this? I will not accept Utano's gold, that's her freedom, but I can't discuss it with her again just yet. She needs to be parted from Mother, otherwise, the institution will confine her. She is slowly losing her mind since I reminded her of a story sealed in the past. Will Rin pay for me, I mean pardon me the debt to return me my freedom, since I don't have the means to make that much gold coins alone. It would take me at least three lifetimes to make enough for the debt with just my dancing. Perhaps she will become my matron in order to secure me for herself forever. I don't want to be in love with someone who doesn't have a problem to possess me. She possesses my heart and love, but on paper, I must be free. I gathered my thoughts, trying redirecting them to focus on seeing Rin.
Hana was comforting me, and everyone else from the house came to escort the carriage. 'Uta, honey, everything will be fine. Don't be so sad, three days will pass in a blink of an eye.'
I'm not even aware that I look like that. My unpleasant thoughts must have left such an impression, now it turns out I'm unhappy about a little excursion.
Utano hugged me with tears in her eyes and whispered, 'Keep your heart safe.'
I sat in the carriage all distraught. Utano told me to keep my heart, she wouldn't say something like that to me if she really thinks I'm going to spend time with Gina, so why was she pretending all this time.
She left me completely confused.
They waved me from the porch, and Hana wiped her tears with a napkin, the one she received from Kaoru as a gift. I didn't think my departure would look like that. I'm still thinking about the future I'm going to have with Rin, hopefully. She will surely forgive me the debt, and that's the most reasonable decision. I'll continue with the dance, that's the only thing I know how to do, except the tea and sake serving. Of course, she didn't mention it, we just acknowledged our love for each other, and she wouldn't immediately discuss such practical matters with me. She loves me, I'm the only one for her. After all, until this situation with Yoshiwara isn't solved, we must hide our love. I'm sure she has my debt in her plans and maybe is afraid to mention it after my fiery reaction on the kimono I slept with. I said I don't need her wealth. Choreographies will make me golden coins, just, only that debt – it's not appropriate to be owned by the person with whom I share love, but that is the topic for some other time. Now I'm going to spend a pleasant moment filled with joyful expectations.
Through the window, I observed the monotonous scenes from which my eyelids started to lower, exhaustion catching up to me because of all those torrential events. I will use this time to close my eyes for a bit.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Rin
I'm standing in front of the house since I sent for Yuna. I would like to help her get out of the carriage like a proper lady would do for a fragile girl in distress. It's troubling to get down from it in kimono without help. Arising excitement made me light one cigar after the other, and now I'm surrounded by cigarette butts all over the ground, and I gave my service the time off. How will I let her see this mess? Oh, I'm panicking now - not even sure where the broom or a mop could be stashed. Maybe in a pantry, just as I turned to take a step, the sound of a carriage came to my attention. I can't go - but this raff!? I quickly swept it aside with my foot, hoping she wouldn't notice it.
My favourite kimono is on me, with probably too much scent oil on it as well as on my skin, but I want to make an impression as I strived to every time we had a meeting so far.
The carri
age stopped, yet the doors are still closed. I approached, reaching for them.
She is sleeping, curled on a seat like a small snail. I melted on the site showing the carriage man to stay silent, and I climbed up to her. She must be exhausted. I approached her slowly, descending next to her, my sleeping girl... I gently placed my lips on her forehead, but she stirred instantly.
✽✽✽
Yuna
'It's just me.' Rin's warm eyes caught mine, her beautiful red lips stretched into a smile. Jasmin scent overtook my senses, ensuring a blush on my cheeks. How could this happen to me, I fell asleep - panic struck me. I came to her sleeping on a bench of the carriage she sent for me, like some valley girl. 'You're blushing – don't be embarrassed, I know you are tired. We have lots of beds in the house, but I didn't know that the carriage could also be an appealing place for a nap.'
'Rin, I'm sorry. I was excited.'
'I know, stop apologizing. Come to me, you still haven't kissed me.' I hugged her, she is always full of understanding. She kissed me so passionately like we were somewhere far from this small uncomfortable box. My blood churned beneath her touch, awakening me momentarily. 'I must notice that your excitement continues.' She whispered, her voice coming out as from a woman who enjoys a passionate act.
'I'm awakened by a lady with the scent of jasmine, which just now is holding her hands on some inappropriate places, I would say that she is not resilient to excitement herself.'
'I like it when you show me an attitude.' Her lips are letting me know how weak she is on me. She took me by the hand, then helped me out of the carriage.
'Thank you, Respected lady, I hope you are not this kind to all of your guests.'