Not moving, Sutton looked to Arthur for help, but Arthur was playing with Nicole as she sat in the bouncy chair on the table. “I’ve never held a baby,” Sutton confessed.
“Quit being a bitch and hold out your arms!” Vicki barked, and Wendy gave a startled gag.
Whipping her eyes to Arthur to unleash, Wendy saw him holding up one hand. “She used it in the proper context, so back off,” Arthur told her calmly.
“You want to sweep and mop the floors twice today after you get finished working?” Vicki snapped and when Sutton was about to turn to Arthur, Vicki stomped her bare foot on the floor with a loud smack. “He won’t help you and will give you more to do, now hold out your damn arms!”
Very slowly, Sutton reached out and Vicki put the baby in his arms. All of the babies were old enough now to control their heads, so all you had to do was hold them. After Sutton took the baby, he gave a nervous smile as the baby patted his face.
Noticing Skannish chuckling, “You get the next one,” Vicki informed him and strolled out.
The smile fell off Skannish’s face. Before he turned for help, Arthur said, “Do what Little Momma says and happiness will reign.”
Like the baby would explode if he moved it fast, Sutton held it to his chest. “You really think rats are going to be a problem?” he asked.
Throwing back his head, Arthur let out a laugh. “I can guarantee you there are people, healthy people, that have been taken down by rats and eaten,” he declared, and the room fell silent as everyone froze. Glancing around, Arthur saw everyone staring at him in shock. “Guys, if you have thousands of rats jump on you when you enter a building, you’ll be hard-pressed to get out, but only if you didn’t panic. I, for one, will tell you, my ass would panic like a little punk-ass bitch that got his dick trapped in a mousetrap. Even if you got out, I think you would die days later from all the bites and scratches. One rat bite can be bad, but think of what several hundred would do. One rat doesn’t weigh but a pound or so. A hundred climb on you and they could bring you down.”
“They are rats,” Skannish said as Vicki came in with a baby on each hip. Not waiting, she put a baby in his arms. Not wanting the child they called Little Momma on his ass, Skannish took the baby and held it like Sutton was holding his. As Vicki handed off the other baby to empty arms, she headed out again.
“Skannish, you realize rats breed five times a year and can have up to fourteen in each litter. They reach sexual maturity in five weeks. This started six months ago and they have an abundant food supply. It was believed there was one rat for every person on the planet. Let’s take Russellville,” Arthur paused, putting a pacifier in Nicole’s mouth. “It had a population around thirty thousand. Let’s just say it had ten thousand rats in March. Just using reproduction rates, there will be well over half a million now. They have food, and humans were the only thing killing them off with poison, so there’s nothing keeping them in check,” Arthur explained as everyone shivered when the images filled their minds.
Vicki came back in and handed off the last babies. When she walked past Arthur, he reached out and pulled her into his lap. As he pulled her to his chest, Vicki gave a smile, closing her eyes and snuggling in his chest. Even with images of rats, Wendy couldn’t help but smile at Vicki. She was very proud that Arthur made sure he spread his love around.
“Fuck,” Joseph gasped, breaking the moment of shock and Wendy just gave a nod, thinking that was an appropriate response.
“Oh, don’t think we’ll have it as bad here,” Arthur scoffed. “Any human that’s not out of a city like New York by now is as good as dead. New York will be closing in on a billion plus rats now. Numbers like that would just swarm over you like water.”
“We avoid any city until the rats die off,” Wendy declared.
“We’ll try, but rats will have the numbers for several years before they’re brought back into balance,” Arthur told her.
“But the cadavers will be gone by winter even if you’re half right,” Sutton said, looking at the baby in his arms and had to admit, he enjoyed holding it.
“Duh,” Arthur droned. “Rats are hunters, and guess what else is breeding in large numbers?” Arthur sang out and everyone just looked at him.
Seeing nobody answering, “Mice,” Arthur told them. “After this winter, any food not in a can or jar will be gone. Hell, after this winter you’ll be hard-pressed to find a car that’ll crank up without work. Rats and mice will chew the hoses, electrical wires, and belts.” Seeing Sutton cringe, everyone was glad he felt stupid and they didn’t.
Like a light bulb went off in each head, the kids and adults understood now why Arthur had the valley below them packed with vehicles. “It will take a few years because there’s so much cropland for the mice population to fill. The good news is by the end of next year, the rat and mice population will spread out and it won’t be a death sentence to walk into buildings in the cities,” Arthur said, then shrugged. “But by then, whatever was there will be pretty much worthless.”
“But you have dogs as a threat,” Skannish said, tapping the notepad with one hand as the other held the baby to his chest.
“Oh and they will be, but I don’t expect them to put a hurt on the rat population for a year. I really think dogs will realize after the bodies are gone that one rat can make a meal. But,” Arthur said, raising his hand up and pointing at the ceiling. “I’ve already come across dogs inside of houses that’ve been taken down by rats. I didn’t stay long but until rats spread out, nothing can hunt them effectively.”
As chills racked her body, Wendy shook in her chair. “You are fucking insane for going in houses after seeing that.”
“Not going to argue, not my smartest move,” Arthur admitted. “But I’ve seen it with my own eyes, packs of thousands of rats moving around. When they leave a body, the only thing left is jewelry and teeth.”
“A wall can’t stop them!” Sutton cried in panic.
“No shit,” Arthur scoffed. “It’ll stem the tide and I’ll put electrical wire on the top to stem them from climbing over, but we should be good until winter when they start to move from the cities and towns.”
Jumping up, “We finish the wall and levee right now. Everything else is to wait,” Wendy ordered and everyone nodded.
“Doll, we have to cut the three fields to the north for hay and slaughter some cows and pigs,” Arthur told her, and saw Wendy was pale and panting. “I have this lined out the best I can to keep us up on the threats I’ve thought about.”
“Um, Arthur,” Shawn called out softly, and Arthur turned down the table to look at him. “Has anything surprised you yet?” he asked, praying Arthur would say nothing had surprised him.
“Oh yeah,” Arthur nodded, and several nearly passed out. “I totally forgot about wasps.”
Everyone gave a confused startle and many looked at the person next to them for an answer. Shawn could remember seeing lots of wasps lately, but hadn’t really thought about it. “Wasps?” he finally blurted out.
“Yeah,” Arthur nodded, and saw a blank stare on Shawn’s face. “What do wasps eat?” he asked, and Shawn just shrugged because he could honestly say, he had no idea. “They’re omnivores but the young eat meat, and just look at all the flies and bodies around us.”
“Are you allergic?” Sutton asked.
“No,” Arthur answered. “Just hate getting stung and I’ve seen two wasps’ nests in Clarksville that were yards across with thousands of wasps. That many sting you and it doesn’t matter if you’re allergic or not, you’re going to die. They weren’t hornets. That honeycomb nest was six feet long and two feet across.”
“Anything else?” Shawn asked, and Wendy almost told him to shut the fuck up, she didn’t want to know if Arthur had other things surprise him.
“No.”
Thinking for several minutes, “That’s why you haven’t been so worried about people,” Shawn declared. “They’re scavenging for food and a place to stay safe from animals.�
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“Very good,” Arthur grinned. “Yes, even the assholes are realizing nature is more ruthless than they could ever be. Gangs are only taking targets of opportunity, they really aren’t searching for people to take from. They’re gathering what they can before the rats do. Even Dean’s little pussy gang has realized if they don’t gather stuff up, there won’t be anything left by winter after the mice and rats.”
Turning to see everyone from both tables, except the toddlers, looking at him, “Can we eat? I really would like to start the day,” he told everyone.
Picking up her plate, “Those of you that don’t have a room yet, suck it up,” Wendy sang out. “We’re working on the fence and levee. After the fence is up, we’ll put people to finishing the rooms.”
Not one person argued because they were all nodding enthusiastically. “When are you expecting people to be a problem?” Ellie asked from the end of the table.
“Anytime, but by next summer you’ll get groups actively hunting for others to exploit,” Arthur answered. “Humans are a big danger now but for some reason, they’re scared to come around here,” he grinned.
“Yeah, I can see that, Caravan Man,” Ellie smirked.
“What about crazies?” Shawn asked.
“I don’t count those as human, and I’ve killed three within a mile of here. One where we hid the road,” Arthur told him, and everyone looked around in shock. “That’s why I do patrols around us and why I kill them on sight.”
“And you go right ahead,” Wendy nodded, grabbing his plate and loading it with food.
“How can they still be alive? I’ve never seen one eat and I’ve seen a lot of them,” Ellie stated.
Shaking his head, “Oh no, they eat,” Arthur assured her. “Sometimes what they eat isn’t even dead.”
“They eat animals alive?” Shawn gasped.
“It’s not always animals,” Arthur replied. “I’ve even seen one crazy beat down another and chomp on him.”
The entire room went quiet except for the babble of the toddlers. “Fuck the levee, we get the wall up first,” Joseph mumbled.
“I’ll happily deal with the crazies before the waves of rats,” Arthur told Joseph as he stroked Vicki’s hair while she cuddled into his chest. He looked down and saw her eyes were closed and she was smiling contently. Making a mental note to give Vicki more praise and go out of his way to treat her like a little girl, Arthur glanced around. “We’ll do the best we can and if trouble finds us, we’ll deal with it ruthlessly.”
Putting Arthur’s plate in front of him, “I want to start going out with you,” Wendy told him, again.
“You aren’t back to full health, so fuck no,” Arthur told her, and Wendy drew in a breath. “Babe, I got fucking chased by a pack of rats. I looked it up after I got back and rats can run at eight miles an hour, but that pack was eating on some bodies in a backyard. I jumped over a fence and saw a mound of fur, then the fur turned into a thousand rats charging me. Still don’t remember climbing back over that fence and for all I know, I jumped that fucker using my dick as a pole-vault,” Arthur said with a shiver. “The rats didn’t have to climb it, they ran between the boards. The next fence was a chain link fence and they just ran through it and it didn’t look like I was putting any distance between us. When I finally got to a street, I was able to pour on the speed.”
“Where were Donald and Daisy?” Wendy asked shivering violently.
“Left them near the Blazer in case one of Dean’s boys found it,” Arthur replied. “If they would have been with me, I’m sure the pack would have reached us. That’s why I want you in top shape, so you can run.”
Feeling numb, “I’ll wait till you think I’m ready,” Wendy mumbled.
“It’s all good, doll, when you’re ready I’ll take you out, and that can be our date night,” Arthur chuckled, then let out a Pee Wee Herman laugh.
Like he had been insulted, “That man was atrocious,” Skannish spat out. “Pee Wee Herman indeed, to be a star on a children’s show and do that.”
Whipping his head around, “He was in an adult theater, not at Cinemark watching The Little Mermaid! And he didn’t do it on the damn show!” Arthur shouted. “What the hell do you go see a skin flick for? To spank the monkey, dumb ass! If the movie had been good enough, I would’ve stood up on the armrests challenging everyone to a circle jerk.”
Joseph threw his head back laughing as Skannish stared at Arthur in shock. “That’s to be done in private,” Skannish mumbled.
“An adult theater is private. I think Pee Wee just made the others in there jealous because he wasn’t pee wee,” Arthur huffed.
Lifting her head up and looking up at Arthur, “Why do you want to spank a monkey?” Vicki asked, and Shawn slid out of his chair laughing. Arthur looked down at the innocence on Vicki’s face and was happy some was still inside her. “Monkeys are cute and funny, you don’t need to spank them.”
Pulling her head back to his chest, “I’m going to miss this, but for now, I’m going to cherish it,” Arthur sighed, then kissed the top of Vicki’s head.
Pushing back, Vicki kissed his cheek and hopped down. “I have to eat so I can get dressed,” she told him and ran over to the other table. No sooner than Vicki ran off, the clatter of small boots clacking on the floor sounded.
Shoveling food in his mouth, Arthur turned to see Robin standing beside his chair holding her arms up. Emptying his mouth, “Well, you still have on your pull-ups and even though you wore your new boots to bed putting bruises on me,” Arthur sighed and picked her up.
Robin smiled and leaned her head back against his chest as Arthur ate. “Dad, I can’t believe you of all people went through life without using a call girl,” Joseph snickered.
“I never said I hadn’t,” Arthur replied, and Joseph drew in a breath. “You asked if I had ever hired one, I haven’t,” Arthur told him, and Joseph let the breath out in shock. “Your mom paid her,” Arthur said, pushing his chair away from the table. He put Robin on his hip as he picked up Nicole and just strolled out.
Slowly, Joseph turned to Wendy. “Don’t,” she warned, holding up her hand. “You weren’t born yet and I wanted to experiment, but not with someone I knew. Because someone I knew would still see Arthur and want to continue, and then I would have to cut the bitch’s throat.”
Pushing back, Wendy got up. “We have work to do,” she told everyone, not feeling the least bit embarrassed.
“And some of you wonder who the bad influence is now,” Joseph chuckled.
Climbing back in his chair, “Pops was the bad boy,” Shawn said rather proudly.
Nodding, “Oh, you’re right, but he stopped when he was eighteen, then met Mom a year later,” Joseph said. “Mom was by all means a good little Catholic girl, but when she met Dad and heard his stories, she wanted to see what it was like. In case you haven’t figured it out yet, Mom is the bad influence now. When she realized Dad could teach her how to be bad and not get caught, oh boy,” Joseph sighed.
He looked at Shawn and saw shock at the declaration. “Shawn, whatever Mom wants, Dad will do it and never bat an eye. She’s my mom, but Mom likes being a bad girl,” Joseph told him. “And she’s fucking good at it. Look who her teacher is. Dad was bad because he had to be, Mom is bad because she wants to be.”
“I thought Arthur turned into a good boy at eighteen,” Shawn gasped.
“Oh, compared to his youth, he became a motherfucking saint, but there have been lapses because Mom wanted lessons and a partner in crime,” Joseph grinned. “How do you think Dad still knows how to steal cars? He had to keep up with the changes. On their second date, Mom got Dad to steal a car off a car lot. They brought it back before the dealer opened, but now you see what I mean. Mom really influences Dad’s mood.”
“He still stole cars?” Andrea cried out. “With your mom?”
“They brought it back. What’s the big deal?” Joseph shrugged. “We always brought them back.”
“We?!” sever
al shouted.
“I wanted to learn too, damn it!” Joseph snapped. “We only stole from lots and never kept the car, and with the exception of one corvette, all were returned in the same condition. The vette had a scratch on the door when Dad and I returned it. If that fucking cop hadn’t tried to chase us, I never would’ve got that close to a mailbox.”
Everyone was staring at Joseph in shock. “Hey, none of you had to deal with Mom when we got home. She was pissed off that she hadn’t been with us, but it was boy’s night,” Joseph told them. Giving a shrug, “So the next week she had to go out with us, and boy’s night became family night. Thankfully, we weren’t chased by any cops.”
“You could’ve gotten in trouble, big trouble,” Andrea told him.
Nodding, “Very true, and that’s the only time I’ve been chased by cops. I was getting used to driving a manual transmission,” Joseph admitted.
“Um, how old were you?” Shawn asked.
“Thirteen,” Joseph answered. “Yes, I did get in trouble because I dumped the clutch at a stop light getting the cops’ attention. Dad always says, ‘If anyone ever knows you broke a law, you’ve failed’.”
“You could’ve gotten killed,” Sutton mumbled in shock.
“The way I was driving, I can’t even argue that,” Joseph admitted. “But Dad had me stop so we could change spots and he could drive. Once he was behind the wheel, the cop should’ve just gone for donuts because we lost him in five minutes. Dad can drive, and he makes plans if things don’t go his way.”
“No shit, he can drive,” Todd sang out.
“I had great parents and a great family. I know it’s strange but for some reason, I feel cheated,” Andrea mumbled as she stood up, grabbing her plate.
“Pops and Momma are great,” Jo Ann and Sally said together as they skipped out holding hands.
When kids came over and took the babies from Skannish and Sutton, they both sighed with relief as Sarah walked over. “So, what do you two think?” she asked.
Miracles Page 19