by Tyler, Q. B.
“There’s nothing to protect me from, Aria. I swear, I’m fine.”
“You haven’t answered my question. Sweetheart, if Cal has touched you or…anything…” she swallows. “It’s rape.”
“It is not!” The knee jerk reaction to hearing that word is all the confirmation Aria needs because she bursts into tears.
“Oh my God, Maddie!”
“Oh my God.” I put my face in my hands. How the hell did we get here? Oh my God, Cal is going to lose it.
“You can’t…you can’t fucking live with him! I’m going to kill him.” She’s pulling out her credit card and waving our waiter over when I shake my head.
“Aria, no! Listen to me, it’s not what you’re thinking!”
“Oh, so he hasn’t touched you sexually?”
Lie. And make it convincing Maddie. At least till you get home and you and Cal can figure something out. “No! I just…I want to.” I bite my bottom lip, the tears in my eyes have now moved down my face. “You’re right, it’s a crush. But it’s harmless and I’m working through it, I swear. He would never touch me, Aria.”
I think my explanation works, but she shakes her head as she gives the waiter her card. “You’re moving out.”
“What? Aria…”
“I remember being eighteen and feeling like I was in love. You need space to get over this, Maddie.” She puts a hand over her chest. “God, you scared the hell out of me. I thought…” She pinches the bridge of her nose and runs a hand through her hair. “I love Cal, but you’re my number one priority. I’d nail him to the wall for fucking touching you.” My blood runs cold hearing her words. I wasn’t sure how I expected her to take it. I thought maybe she’d be accepting, or support me, support us. I hadn’t anticipated this reaction. “I know you’re not crazy about the idea, but it’s for the best Mads, you’ll thank me one day, I promise.”
“OH MY GOD CAL, ANSWER the fucking phone!” I bang my hand against the steering wheel as I end the call through my Bluetooth. The tears well in my eyes and they dart to the rearview mirror as I look for Aria’s car. My grip on the steering wheel is so tight, I feel like they’re burning as I wring my hands around it. I let out a deep breath as I lessen the grip and lean my head back against the headrest. I’m convinced Aria is going to follow me home to wait for Cal, disallowing me from explaining the situation in anything but a calm and rational tone.
I am neither calm nor rational at the moment.
I am borderline hysterical.
I’ve spent practically every day of the past ten years with Cal, and every day of the past week with Cal in bed, and I’m not keen on the idea of changing either trend. I bite my bottom lip as I press his contact again and a sound of exasperation leaves my lips when I get his voicemail again.
What if this was important?
He knows you’d call the station.
I huff a sigh of irritation as I continue to fly down the back road. It has one lane with trees on both sides for miles. I’m not far from home when I see my dashboard light up signaling a call.
“Oh my God, where have you been?” I know that’s not the way to start a phone call with Cal as it’ll put him on edge immediately. I always know to be calm in the first few minutes, so that Cal won’t set the world on fire in attempts to find me.
“What’s wrong? Why do I have five missed calls from you? Where are you?” His voice is just between nervousness and anger and filled with anxiety. Somewhere between “is something wrong?” and “there better be something wrong with the way you’ve got me worried.”
I let out a breath, trying to calm the adrenaline rushing through my veins. Don’t freak out because then he’ll freak out. “I’m fine. When will you be home? I have to talk to you.”
“I have a lot going on today, Maddie. I don’t have time—”
“Make time.” I grit through my teeth. “This is important.”
“I can’t get home right now. I have to meet with Aria in a few minutes and—”
“Do not meet with Aria,” I tell him and he’s silent on the other end.
“Did you guys have a fight or something? I don’t have the energy to mediate you two today and it’s Christmas Eve, shut it down.” I sigh as I think about the fact that he has gotten between a few of our arguments in our day, usually when I thought she was taking the bad cop thing too seriously, and I wanted the good cop to bail me out.
“No! Cal, it’s bigger than that.” I stop, wondering how to phrase my next words. Do I just blurt it out? Or do I ease into it?
“Does…does she know something?”
“She has a hunch. I just spent the last hour and a half with her and she flat out asked me if we’re having sex, so, NO Cal, do not meet with her right now.”
I hear the sounds of a door closing. “What!? What would make her ask that?”
“Because some whore you went out with showed up and I got territorial, okay?”
He groans and I can already hear him pacing the length of his office. He’s probably pulling at his hair, his sexy mouth pulled into a scowl.
And now I’m thinking about his mouth and everything it can do.
I continue. “Cal, she wants me to move in with her and Henry. She says living with you is too…tempting.”
“WHAT?” he yells and I wince at the volume resounding through my car.
“That was my reaction. I flew off the handle and her cop senses started tingling. She started crying and…it was a mess, Cal. I finally had to tell her that she was right in that I had a crush on you but that you’d never touch me. I panicked.”
“There’s no way I’m letting you move in with Aria and Henry.” His voice is angry, but I know it’s not directed at me. I can also hear the wheels turning in his head. How were we going to get out of this? And now that Aria has a hunch, would Henry tell her what he knows? More importantly, has he already told her and this is all a test?
I bite my lip and nod my head. “Please don’t,” I whisper.
“I won’t. Okay? I’ll take care of it.”
“Don’t…don’t be too obvious.” Aria’s intuition is usually spot on, I mean obviously. But Cal is quick on his feet and smart as hell. He’ll take care of it. He’ll fix it.
He has to.
The sound of the front door almost makes me drop the spoon I’m using to stir the chili I’m making. It’s Cal’s favorite and something tells me he’ll want something like this after dealing with Aria. I’m just about to turn around and make my way towards the door when I feel hands around my waist and his lips at my neck. “I could get used to this,” he murmurs in my ear and presses a kiss just behind it. I’m instantly flooded with feelings so intense that he may as well have kissed my pussy. His hand moves around me and slides into my sweatpants and into my panties so easily it catches me off guard. I shiver as his cold hand rubs the warm slick skin between my legs, his calloused fingers rubbing my clit so gently it makes my knees weak.
“Get used to what?” I spin around to face him effectively removing his hand from my pussy.
He sucks the two fingers that were previously inside of me into his mouth and lets them go with a salacious pop. “You in my kitchen when I get home.”
“Because I haven’t been for the better part of the last year?” I raise my eyebrow at him and he rolls his eyes in response.
“You had to kill it.” He takes a step back and grabs a beer from the fridge.
I almost don’t care that the moment has passed because we have important things to discuss. I don’t want to get lost in Cal and I getting intimate. “So, what happened with Aria?”
“She never even stopped by, and I certainly didn’t want to call her and initiate anything.” He pulls me away from the stove and sits down, pulling me into his lap. “Not when I wanted to get home to you.” He grabs my head and brings me closer to his mouth when I stop.
“Cal, wait.”
“You’re telling me to wait?” He chuckles. “You usually toss your panties at me the second
I’m through the door.” He tugs at the waistband of my sweatpants and peers down them before letting them go to snap against my skin.
I scoff at his comment. “Rude and untrue. Sometimes I make you work for it.” Rarely. I put a finger up when he goes to respond. “Eventually you’re going to have to talk to Aria. Tomorrow is Christmas, and we’ll all be at Margie’s…it might come up.”
“She’s not going to bring anything like that up in front of my mother.”
“Then she’ll pull you aside, Cal. You didn’t see Aria today. She was like a dog with a bone and you know how she is when she fixates on something! She’s not going to let this go. Come new year she wants me out of here.”
“And that’s not her fucking call to make. Besides, you’ll be eighteen.”
“I’m still under your care until I graduate high school.”
“Technically, but it’s a fine line. She can’t really make you do anything…”
I let out a deep sigh. “I’m not going to be able to enjoy tomorrow or my birthday. I feel like she’ll be perceiving everything differently. I won’t be able to touch you or be near you without her thinking it’s something more.” A chill comes over me, and I push myself into his arms, resting my head on his shoulder as he wraps his arms around me. “This sucks.”
“Hey, you can always be near me. No one will ever tell you differently. I know our connection is different now, but nothing could ever break the bond that we have.”
I pull away from his chest and raise an eyebrow at him. “And what bond is that? Daddy and his little girl?”
He pinches my side and shakes his head, but I don’t mistake the way his cock jumps underneath me. He loves it as much as I do. I bite my bottom lip and his eyes darken as he takes in a breath. “You’re going to kill me with that. But no…” He trails off. “I don’t know what it is, Mads. I just know that you’ve always been special to me. When we met ten years ago, obviously I wasn’t thinking we’d ever get here. That thought never even crossed my mind. But after the first year, I knew I’d be in your life for the rest of it, and eventually, you’d be an adult and I thought we’d be friends…I knew we’d be friends. Even in passing, Aria and Henry have mentioned being there for your first…” he clears his throat aggressively, “legal drink.” I turn and grab his beer from the table and put the bottle to my lips with a wink and run my tongue along the opening. I feel him hardening beneath me, and I realize I don’t want to talk about it anymore. I drag my tongue up the neck of the bottle before taking a long sip of his beer and then set it back down. When I turn to face him, his nostrils are flared and his grip on my hips is tightening to the point of bruising. “Maddie.” His voice is hoarse and I rub against him in response.
“Cal.” His name falls from my lips in a whisper, my lips ghosting along his as he grabs my ass and cups it hard. He pushes me harder against him and a gush floods my panties. “Mmmm.” I moan just as his lips meet mine. “Fuck me.” The words leave my mouth like a sigh and I squeeze my eyes shut as I try to control the electricity buzzing through me and creating the euphoria I’ve become addicted to.
Now I understand the meaning of the word dickmatize.
“I’ve been thinking about your sexy little mouth since I left this morning…I want you to suck my cock again…”
My eyes widen and a smile finds my lips. “Yes, please.”
“While you sit on my face.” I know my eyes are wide and nervous right now. We’d never done that before, although I’d seen it in pornography so I understand the logistics. I can tell that Cal wants us to try, but it makes me anxious.
“Hey, you don’t have to blow me, baby.” He nuzzles my ear. “You can just straddle my face and ride it.”
Holy fuck. I had no idea he had such a dirty mouth.
I push back on his chest and flutter my eyelashes as seductively as I can. “No, no I want to suck your dick, but…ummm…do I have to do the other thing?”
“Yes. That’s non-negotiable.”
“Cal…”
“What are you so nervous about? You were less nervous to lose your virginity. Baby, this won’t hurt.”
“No, I know I just…what if I can’t keep myself up and I…you know, suffocate you?” I whisper and he rolls his eyes.
“Then what a way to go.” He smirks. “This isn’t up for debate, Madeline. We’re doing this. Because I know you’ll like it.” He rubs his nose against mine.
“Okay…do you want to eat first?” He raises an eyebrow at me and I shake my head. “Food fiend.” I point at the stove.
“I mean…not particularly, but I suppose I won’t plan to stop once we start, so food first is smart.” I climb off his lap and he slaps my ass causing me to giggle.
“I mean if you’re not hungry…” My mind is already upstairs in bed with Cal, my mouth all but trying to swallow his dick as he feasts on my cunt. I’d begun craving orgasms just as much as I hungered for food and thirsted for water. It’s as if in one week, Cal has changed my basic needs, skyrocketing him and his cock into the number one slot. The idea of being in that space with him gives me a heady feeling, better than being tipsy or the high of a great ballet performance. It is a full body high that I can’t put into words. I just know that I want to live in that space.
Cal’s already up the stairs before I can blink. I turn the oven off and I’m on my way up the stairs behind him when I hear keys in the door.
Jesus Christ, Cal needs to take everyone’s keys back. What if we were already going at it?
I cross my arms over my chest and cock my head to the side, preparing for God knows who when Aria walks through the door and I resist the urge to roll my eyes. “Mads, hey.” She smiles, like she doesn’t have plans to turn my whole world upside down. Like she hasn’t spent the better part of lunch accusing Cal of something she considers abhorrent. She’s severely dressed down in comparison to lunch, sporting only a pair of leggings and a sweatshirt under her coat and a Mariner’s baseball cap with her long ponytail hanging out the back.
“Aria.” I nod and she shakes her head.
“Still upset, I see.”
“You think I’m upset, wait till you talk to Cal.” I purse my lips.
“You told him?”
“What do you think?”
“I knew I should have talked to him first. I knew you’d get him worked up.”
“Can you blame her?” Cal comes walking down the steps, in sweatpants and a t-shirt and for a second, I feel a flash of jealousy that Aria gets to see him like this. This is for my eyes only, goddammit. Flashes of dry humping him in those gray sweatpants because it allowed me to feel everything comes flooding back and I let out a breath.
She swallows and I can tell she’s nervous. “Cal…can we talk about this in private?”
“Maddie is old enough to be a part of this conversation. She’ll be eighteen in two days.” He nods towards me. His jaw is hard, the angles so sharp they could cut through almost anything, alerting me that he’s gritting his teeth hard. I want to reach out and rub his jaw to loosen the taut muscles before he hurts himself, but I keep my hands to myself.
“Which is exactly the point.”
His brown eyes that in the past week I’ve only seen filled with scorching heat, are now filled with a fiery rage. “I’m still lost.”
“You’re going to make me spell it out for you?” She blinks her eyes several times.
“Yep.”
She lets her head drop and moves into the kitchen. “It’s not going to matter if she’s eighteen, Cal. You’re her guardian. Everyone knows that. You raised her.”
“You’re talking to me like this is even an issue.” From Aria’s point of view, this might sound like a denial, but I can hear the true meaning. It’s not an issue because fuck everyone, Madeline is mine in every sense of the word.
“They’ll think…” She blows out a breath.
“What do you think?” he asks and I can hear the accusation. You think I’d ever hurt Maddie?
�
�I think Maddie is impressionable and young, but old enough to make decisions that can impact her life in a dangerous way. There’s an impulsivity and a sense of immortality that comes with being eighteen that’s dangerous and reckless and…”
“That’s never been me!” I exclaim. I wasn’t the rebellious teenager, I’ve never tried drugs, I don’t sneak out after curfew, I get impeccable grades…
“You’ve been experimenting with alcohol for how long now?” There is just that one little thing. But everyone does it! What else is there to do in this boring town?
“That’s so different!”
“You’re right, in some ways it’s even more dangerous than experimenting with sex.” She looks at me and sighs. “To my knowledge, you’re still a virgin, but who knows how long that will last.”
“You make it sound like at the stroke of midnight, I’m going to sneak into Cal’s room and seduce him.” I wave her off.
“The mere fact that you can say that with a straight face, and Cal barely reacts to it makes me believe it’s a very real possibility.” She crosses her arms. “To be frank, I think there’s already something going on, and it scares the hell out of me.” The tears are back in her eyes as she shifts her gaze between us. “Well, someone deny it.”
“Maddie, go upstairs.” He doesn’t look at me, probably knowing that a look shared between us wouldn’t be lost on Aria. He keeps his eyes trained on her, his stance combative and assertive. This is going to get ugly.
I should probably start packing.
MY EYES, ONES I KNOW to be blazing with fury and anger find the source and narrow slightly. I know that I need to reign in my temper before I explode all over Aria, but I’m livid, Maddie’s emotional, and I was seconds from tasting her cunt when Aria barged in without an invitation. I am ready to explode.
“Sit down, Aria.” I point at the table, and when she doesn’t move, it’s enough to push me over the edge. “I said, sit the fuck down,” I growl. I rarely use this voice and I’ve never used it on anyone in my family so I’m not surprised when her green eyes widen and she slowly lowers herself to the table.