by Beth Wiseman
But her heart skipped a beat when she heard footsteps in the hallway, much too heavy to be Lizzie’s or even Esther’s. Lloyd must have returned from wherever he’d gone. Rose fumbled for Benjamin’s phone on the nightstand. It was still half charged, and it lit up when she held it to her chest, her heart pounding. She’d gotten Amos’s and Gus’s phone numbers from Esther’s address book she kept in the kitchen. She could barely read the numbers in the dark. Getting the police involved in anything was always a last resort. Still, Amos probably kept his phone off at night, and she hated to bother Gus since he was sick.
As he’d done the night before—now she was certain it was him—he turned her doorknob. She wanted to scream for him to go away, but he went to his room, and she heard the door close behind him.
Despite her attempts to recapture her visions of Benjamin, she was wide awake and alert. Hopefully her and Lizzie’s plan would work and Lloyd would leave first thing in the morning, if not sooner.
Chapter 16
The next morning, Esther was sipping her coffee in the kitchen when Lizzie and Rose came into the room together. Lizzie refused to look at Esther, and Rose plastered on a smile that couldn’t have looked more fake if she’d tried.
“You’re up early,” Rose said as she scurried to the cabinet where the pots and pans were stored. “I’ll get started on breakfast for our guest.”
Lizzie kept her head down as she poured herself a cup of coffee.
Esther ran her finger along the rim of her coffee cup. “Don’t rush to start breakfast.”
Rose slowly turned around to face Esther, and Lizzie eventually did also.
“Our guest left at about five this morning.” Esther raised her chin. “I woke up when I heard loud steps coming down the stairs, and I met Lloyd in the living room.”
“She did it!” Lizzie pointed to Rose, whose mouth fell open.
“You helped!” Rose fired back, a skillet in her hand, dangling at her side.
Esther wasn’t sure what was funnier—the way the man bolted out the door earlier, or Lizzie and Rose blaming each other now. “I’ve never seen a man get out of this haus so fast. He said his room was infested with mice and that he couldn’t spend one more night here.” She paused, tapping a finger to her chin. “How did that happen? And how are we going to get rid of the mice you two turned loose in his room?” She pointed a finger back and forth between Lizzie and Rose, landing on Lizzie. “You’re a bad influence on Rose.” Esther’s chest hurt from stifling laughter.
“Me?” Lizzie set her coffee on the counter, then put a hand to her chest. “It was her idea.”
“And there aren’t any mice. Only droppings.” Rose glanced at Lizzie and grinned. “A whole lot of droppings.” She turned to Esther. “And I’ll clean it all up right away. But, Esther, I just don’t think I could have spent one more night upstairs with him nearby.”
Esther finally couldn’t hold it. She almost spit from coughing when she started laughing. “He was a creepy fellow, wasn’t he?”
Lizzie and Rose laughed along with Esther, which felt good. It had been a hard week.
* * *
Esther and her clan—as Gus called them—met at the hospital midmorning on Tuesday. They’d hired a driver, but Gus wanted to take his own truck so Jayce rode with him.
Esther’s stomach churned with nervous anticipation as they awaited the results of all their blood tests from the day before. Evelyn, Jayce, Naomi, Amos, Lizzie, Esther, Rose, and the patient all sat in a small room around an oblong table. Esther had been surprised that the test was mostly painless, just a prick on the finger.
Gus hung his head and was unusually quiet. Naomi had left the twins with a sitter, which was probably best. The girls wouldn’t have anything to do in this small room. Evelyn and Naomi carried on with some initial small talk, but everyone was quiet and waiting now.
When the doctor walked in, he introduced himself and asked if everyone understood Gus’s condition. He reiterated that there was only a slim chance that the chemotherapy would work, but that it was certainly worth a shot. Gus would have three more treatments.
Esther thought Gus’s hair looked a bit thinner, and his middle was shrinking daily. She took a deep breath and put a hand across her roiling stomach.
“First of all, thank you all for coming and for agreeing to give blood. Even if your blood doesn’t go directly to Gus, he will get credit in his name, and it will also help other patients who are in need of blood transfusions. It’s shocking to most people how often we run out of available blood and patients have to wait to have much-needed transfusions.” The young doctor, who didn’t look old enough to be a physician, turned to Gus. “You are a lucky man to have such good friends.”
Lizzie snickered, but quickly put a hand over her mouth. Thankfully, she had her dentures in today.
Gus cleared his throat but didn’t say anything.
Dr. Meadows tapped a folder to his hand. “We have some very good news that shocked most of the staff. Less than one percent of the population has Gus’s blood type, and one of you is an exact match. That means that your blood and platelets can go directly to Gus, eliminating the wait time for a supply to come from somewhere else. It increases his chance of beating this, which I remind you, still remains very low. Which one of you is Elizabeth Glick?”
Esther brought a hand to her chest as her eyes widened. She was afraid to look at Lizzie, but she finally did and saw her sister’s jaw hanging open.
“Me. I’m Elizabeth Glick,” Lizzie said slowly and cautiously.
“You’re the one,” the doctor announced proudly. “An exact match.”
The color drained from Gus’s face as he looked up at the white-tiled ceiling. “This can’t be happening.” He shook his head, then nodded toward Lizzie. “Does that mean that woman’s blood will be running through my veins?”
The doctor scratched his head. “Uh . . . yes.”
Lizzie raised her hand as if she were in school. “So, let me get this straight. If I give mei blood to Gus, and whatever those other things were that you mentioned, I’m helping to save his life?”
The doctor immediately shook his head. “No. But you would be bettering his quality of life for the time that he has left and eliminating some of the suffering that would be worse without his blood type on hand for a transfusion. Leukemia patients, especially at this stage, require blood transfusions often.”
“You might as well infuse me with poison.” Gus hung his head as he stood up.
Lizzie flashed her pearly whites. “If you want mei blood, you can ask me nicely.”
“Esther, do something,” Gus said, his fists beginning to clench at his sides. “Tell that wacky sister of yours to shut her mouth.”
The doctor held up a hand. “Whoa. I’m not sure what’s going on in here, so I’m going to step out of the room and let you all discuss it.” Frowning, he said, “And please keep your voices down.”
After the doctor left, Esther stood up. “Lizzie and Gus, just hush.” She turned to her sister. “You will not torment Gus about this.” Then she looked at Gus. “And you will be gracious and accepting of Lizzie’s blood in an effort to help you feel better. There will not be another derogatory word said about it. And I mean it.” Esther’s voice shook as she spoke, and her voice was louder than normal.
Gus shuffled out of the room, shaking his head.
“I’ll ride home with him and see if I can get him to calm down.” Jayce kissed Evelyn on the forehead and left.
Esther glared at Lizzie, who was chewing her bottom lip, then she giggled. “Gus Owens is gonna have to kiss mei feet. This will be fun.”
“He’s dying, Lizzie. Shame on you!” Esther rushed out of the room and didn’t stop until she was outside in tears.
Evelyn, Amos, Naomi, and Rose went directly to the van that was waiting for them. Lizzie found Esther on the bench they’d sat on before.
“You gotta admit,” Lizzie said as she put a hand on Esther’s knee. “Gott
does have a sense of humor. Can’t I just have a little fun with this?” Amusement flickered in her sister’s eyes. “You know, something like, ‘Gus, tell me what a wonderful person I am and I’ll let them siphon blood out of me to prolong your existence.’”
Esther huffed as she stood and went to the van.
“Wait, Esther! I’m just kidding. Of course I’ll be nice.”
Esther wasn’t sure about that, and she’d about had it with this feuding between Lizzie and Gus. She didn’t respond as she climbed into the van.
It was a quiet ride home. The driver dropped off Evelyn, and when they arrived back at the inn, Amos and Naomi walked to their house. Gus’s truck was at the cottage.
Esther put a hand across her stomach as she trudged inside with Lizzie and Rose following. It was not surprising that her ulcer was acting up.
“I’m sorry,” Lizzie said as soon as they walked in the house. “I will do better to mind mei manners where Gus is concerned. You’re right. He’s sick, and I should be more considerate of his situation.”
Esther sat down on the couch and propped her feet up on the coffee table. She hadn’t bothered to drop her shoes by the door. It wasn’t a steadfast rule to do so since they often had a lot of people going in and out. Today, she was just anxious to get off her feet.
“I appreciate that, Lizzie. This is emotionally hard enough without you and Gus bickering.”
Lizzie hung her head. “I know.”
Rose gave her a sad smile. “I’ll go prepare lunch. Is there anything special you’d like?” Her soft voice was sympathetic.
“I’m not hungry, hon. I think I’ll go lie down.” Lizzie shuffled to her bedroom and closed the door behind her.
“What about you, Esther? I have a batch of egg salad in the refrigerator, or I can prepare a hot meal.”
“I’ll get myself an egg sandwich in a while. You go ahead and eat if you’d like.” Esther needed her stomach to settle before she considered eating. And she didn’t have much of an appetite.
Rose sat beside Esther on the couch. “Can I ask you something? I know this might not be the best time and that you have a lot on your mind, and—”
“Ask me whatever you want.” Esther yawned, hoping Rose’s inquiry didn’t require an in-depth answer.
“Did something happen between Lizzie and Gus? I mean, we all know how Gus is, but Lizzie borders on hostile when it comes to him.” Rose tipped her head to one side.
“Nee, I don’t think there was any specific event. They just have personalities that don’t jive—worse than the rest of us when it comes to Gus.” She paused in recollection. “They care about each other more than either will admit. It’s almost like a game with them.” She cut her eyes at Rose. “A very irritating game that gets on mei nerves. But I’ve seen instances when one or the other has softened. For example, when Lizzie found out that Gus’s mother died when we were children, she sincerely told Gus that she was sorry for his loss. She hadn’t remembered the event until we found out Gus’s background not long ago. And there have been other sentimental moments between them, but it’s rare.”
Rose nodded. “I see. Well, I hope they will be kinder to each other during this difficult time. I’m going to pray for a miracle related to Gus’s medical condition, but I’m also going to pray that Gus and Lizzie will get along better.”
Esther wanted to take a nap, but Rose gnawed on a fingernail. Something else was on the girl’s mind.
“I believe that mei being here is a miracle,” she said with her eyes cast down.
Esther fought off a yawn. “I think it’s wonderful about you and Benjamin.”
Rose lifted her eyes to Esther’s, but only half smiled. “It is wonderful about Benjamin, but that’s not the miracle I’m speaking of.”
Esther waited. Again, she was noticing more and more how Rose seemed to be thinking out her thoughts before randomly speaking them.
“You and Lizzie are mei miracles. You’ve shown me what real love feels like, what it means to be a family. You refer to our little group as a family, and I feel blessed to be a part of that.”
Esther needed to tread lightly, but she had continued to wonder about Rose’s family. The girl’s comments about her past were becoming more frequent but never shed any light on what things were like when she was growing up.
“And we are blessed to have you in our family.” She waited for Rose to respond, but she started chewing on her fingernail again. “Rose . . . you do know you can talk to me about anything, ya? Even your family back home in Ohio.” Esther wasn’t sure if she should have said that last part.
Rose nodded, then stood up, barely smiling. “Maybe I will someday.”
After Rose went to the kitchen, Esther lifted her tired body from the couch and decided to join her for a sandwich. Maybe Rose would open up a little more about her family.
* * *
Rose was laying out bread, egg salad, and chips when Esther came into the kitchen. “Did you change your mind about eating? Can I make you a sandwich?”
“Ya, that would be nice. Danki. I think my ulcer is acting up a bit. Or maybe I’m just hungry.” Esther pulled out a kitchen chair. “I was going to take a nap, but I probably wouldn’t be able to sleep with all this grumbling going on in mei stomach.”
Esther picked up the letter addressed to Rose’s mother. “It’s nice that you keep in touch with your family.”
Rose had reread the letter to her mother several times and decided to mail it, knowing she might not ever hear from her mom again. “Ya, I try to.” She finished putting together the sandwiches, then carried the plates to the table and went back for the bag of chips. After she was seated and they prayed, Rose glanced at Esther. The woman had dark circles under swollen eyes. Everything with Gus was taking a toll on her. Rose didn’t want to add to her worries, but if she didn’t talk to someone soon, she felt like she would explode.
“Hon, are you all right?” Esther asked before she took a bite of her sandwich.
Rose’s stomach tightened as she considered telling Esther a little about her upbringing. “Ya, I’m okay.” She began to tear the crust off of her bread.
Esther nodded at her plate. “You only do that when you are deep in thought or upset about something.”
“It’s a little of both, I suppose.” She took a deep breath as she eyed the letter. “After I send that to mei mamm, I might not ever hear from her again.”
Esther briefly stopped chewing.
“I didn’t grow up in a normal Amish household. At least, I don’t think I did. Mei daed . . . he, um . . . was very stern with us. Strict.” She’d opened the jar of memories, mostly ones that haunted her. Esther would have questions, and Rose wished she could put the lid back on the jar.
“I think most parents discipline their children?” Esther’s statement sounded more like a question.
“I know.” Rose had never spoken to anyone about the things that went on in her house, and it was proving more difficult than she thought.
“Hon, something is tormenting you. Maybe if you talk about it, you will feel better. And if you don’t want to discuss whatever is bothering you, I will respect that too.”
“I-I think that most kinner get spankings.” Rose paused as her heart raced. How much would she have to tell Esther to make herself feel better? Definitely not all of it. Maybe she needed someone to tell her that the things that happened weren’t normal and that it wasn’t her fault.
Esther offered a gentle smile. “I know that Lizzie and I got our fair share of spankings.” She’d stopped eating. Rose had her full attention.
Sweat beaded at her temples. “As I told you before, mei daed wasn’t a gut man. And our spankings were more like beatings.” She shuddered as she said the word while tearing her crust into tiny pieces. “It was worse for mei bruders, I think. I have five bruders and two schweschdere. It seemed at least one of them always had a black eye or a broken rib, or”—she shrugged as she kept her eyes on the fragments of bread cr
ust—“some other injury.” When she finally looked up, Esther had tears in her eyes. “Us girls were punished a lot too.” She cast her eyes down as a blanket of shame fell over her. “We got into mischief sometimes, and I’m sure we deserved to be punished.” She squeezed her eyes closed and wished she’d never started this.
“What did that man do to you, Rose?” Esther’s voice was somber and calm, but her eyes were glazed with fury.
Rose lowered her eyes to her plate. Her bread crumbs looked like specks of sand. “It’s probably not what you’re thinking,” she said softly.
“Did your father lay his hands on you and your schweschdere?” Esther’s voice shook as she asked the question.
“Not in that way.” She could feel her face burning with embarrassment, and the knot in her throat caused her to feel like she might choke. “He just did things.” It would be easier to tell Esther about things that hadn’t happened to her. “Helen, mei oldest sister, was in charge of keeping the bathrooms clean, but when she started dating, she was home less and less.” She paused as the scene unfolded in her mind. “Mei daed came home from working in the fields. When he found Helen, he grabbed her by the hair and took her into the downstairs bathroom, the one he and mei mamm used. Mei mamm lined up me and mei schweschdere and made us watch. He lifted the lid and stuck her face in the commode. I thought he was going to drown her, but he lifted her up gasping and spewing toilet water, then he did it again . . . and again . . . and again.” Rose wasn’t sure when she’d started crying, but it was a faucet she couldn’t turn off. When she looked at Esther, the poor woman had her hand over her mouth as tears trailed down her cheeks. “There were other things. Many other things.”
“Rose, your father sounds like a monster. No child deserves that type of reprimanding. Ever.” Esther paused to blot her eyes with her napkin. “And shame on your mudder for making you and your schweschdere watch.” She squinted her eyes. “Unless . . . did your daed treat her badly too? Was she afraid of him?”