This is so not how I imagined this playing out – but I give her my number all the same. At the very least, I can say that I tried to get in touch with him. I tried to make things right.
Before she hangs up, she calls my name and just says, “Hang in there.”
With ten minutes to spare before class starts, I leave the teacher’s lounge and head to my classroom. I put the piece of paper back in my pocket and try to stay positive. I can’t have ruined our moment by running away. It can’t be too late to at least tell him that what I felt was real. I open the door to the classroom and look around. It’s empty of course. I walk over to the chalkboard and begin writing today’s schedule. I hear the door click and brace myself for the noise. The kids are back and I am sure I’ll hear their high pitched voices at full volume in a matter of moments.
I finish writing the schedule, shocked that I haven’t heard a peep from one student. Fearing the worst, I turn around. Only one desk is occupied. I open my mouth, ready to talk about the holidays when I stop in my tracks. This is no child. Oh, God. I can’t breathe. Or speak. My heart begins hammering against my chest. Because sitting in the occupied desk is none other than Oliver Burke.
He looks completely ridiculous sitting, all six-feet-two of him, in an elementary school sized desk. And the sight somehow completely robs me of breath.
After he registers the look of total shock on my face, he smiles and stands.
“Why, hello,” he says, looking a mix of shy and confident, if that is possible.
“What are you doing here?” I finally manage.
He shrugs as he walks closer. He looks so laid back right now. So comfortable. In jeans and a dark gray sweater – one of the ones I saw him wear a few times in London – he finally looks off-guard. This is Oliver Burke. No pretenses.
“I came to give you this,” he says, holding out a newspaper.
“You came to give me a newspaper?” I ask. I want to stare at his face, memorize it. But I take the paper from him and look at it, thankful that my fumbling hands at least have something to do. The headlines are all about politics.
“I don’t understand.” I look back up at him nervously.
He smiles and points to the lower corner of the paper. “Right there. Weather predictions. Looks like it’s going to rain in London for three weeks.”
I smile and shake my head. “That figures.” I laugh. “You, um…you came to bring me the paper?” I ask skeptically. “This information is available online too.”
He shakes his head, and in his eyes I think I see exactly why he’s here. “I came to see you,” he says finally. He walks forward until he’s right in front of me. “I came to tell you something.”
“What did you have to tell me?”
“You were wrong.”
That was not what I was expecting him to say. “I was wrong?” I ask, scrunching my face up in confusion. I put the paper down on one of the student’s desks and look up at him.
“Yes. You got it all wrong.” He stuffs his hands in his pockets and looks at me expectantly, as if he’s given me enough information for me to formulate any kind of response.
“I don’t—“
“It wasn’t the beer. Or the song. Or the snow. Or the city.” He bends forward until his face is level with mine and he meets my eyes and forces me to really look at him. “We kissed because something happened between us. Something real and honest.”
“It’s complicated,” I say after a moment. “Because we were not telling each other the truth.”
“You said it was all lies. I’ve been sitting around thinking that I don’t think I’ve ever been as honest with anyone as I was with you.” He sighs, sounding almost frustrated. “You didn’t know I was a detective. Fine. But you knew about my family and my history. I knew about yours.” He takes another step toward me. “I know that you drink two coffees at a time, that you wear a rain coat when you want to tempt fate.” He takes another step toward me until our faces are just inches apart. “I know that you’re a terrible liar.”
I stare at him and shake my head. Because there’s something I still don’t get – something I’ve been dying to know since I returned. “How can you like someone that you suspected of those awful crimes?”
He laughs softly and looks at me like I’m quite possibly the stupidest woman he’s ever met. “Do you really think that I thought you and Cary were them?” he asks. “Do you honestly think that I ever would’ve let you into my sister’s house – let you anywhere near her – if I thought either of you was dangerous? The whole reason that I stayed back an extra day in Paris was to follow around the Sinclairs. I had reason to think it might be them. But every time I saw them, they just made out a lot. And nothing ever happened in Paris. Or in London. I had no proof, just suspicions.”
“Your partner seemed to imply I was your top suspect the entire time.”
He smiles. “He is not my partner. And as for keeping you as a prime suspect…let’s just say that I was a little less communicative about this case’s developments than my boss would have liked.”
“If you honestly didn’t think that I was involved, then why –”
“Because I wanted to spend time with you,” he admits, his face reddening instantly. “I was sure you weren’t the Honeymooners. And I was convinced you and Cary weren’t a real couple. Finding out what’s going on with people is kind of what I do. And I really wanted to see what was going on with you.” He rakes a hand through his hair nervously. “But I couldn’t call you out without calling myself out, and I couldn’t do that. I saw you going out shopping with Mrs. Sinclair, being friendly with her, and she was your neighbor. I couldn’t risk my cover or the case.”
I blink up at him, taking all of this in, seeing my whole trip in a completely new light.
“I’ve never let anyone distract me from a case before. That’s why I felt so bad,” he says, holding my gaze with his now intense one. “You got caught in the middle of the real case – and ended up in danger – because I had feelings for you.” In his eyes, I see how upset he still is over that fact. And yet I don’t detect any signs of regret.
I laugh and hold his gaze. “You did?” I ask.
He moves in even closer. “Still do.”
He inches even closer to my face. If he moves one more millimeter, we will be resuming that kiss we started in the snowy streets of London right here in my classroom.
I pull back, looking around. Something is so wrong here.
“Where are my students?” I finally ask.
He smiles. “Your friend Mary took care of that.”
“Mary?” I exclaim. “How do you know Mar—“
“Cary,” he explains.
Cary put Oliver in touch with Mary?
“Okay,” I say slowly. “Well, where are they?”
“The other third grade teacher, a Mr. Walker, I believe – is taking on the whole class today. You,” he says, dipping his face to kiss my lips for a quick moment. Oh wow. “My dear.” He kisses them again, his breathing growing more ragged. “Are busy.”
And then he wraps his arms around me and crushes me to him – and kisses me fully and firmly with no reservations.
I throw my arms around his neck and kiss him right back.
A million questions buzz through my mind about how this could possibly work, where it could go, but I don’t care. Right now, kissing Oliver, I don’t care about anything.
I’m leaving it all up to fate.
* * *
what a YEAR
Posted by: @Delores at 12:42 PM on december 17 on TheGrayBlog
One year ago, Marian got married and look at her & Tom now – parents! I’m a smidge obsessed w/ baby Calvin. I know he’ll be best friends with big cousin, Lulu. I cannot believe she’s already six months old. But I honestly cannot believe that Calvin was born ON their anniversary! I knew something amazing would happen because the psychic at their wedding told me so. That’s right, everyone. I visited the psychic station and had my fortu
ne told! And you all say that I always play it safe and think that just because I told Marian how odd having a psychic at the wedding was, that I don’t have an adventurous side too and wouldn’t be caught dead going to see the woman. Well. SEE HER, I DID! She told me that the year would bring new beginnings to my family! SEVEN new beginnings IN ONE YEAR. And so I count:
1.Jake and Mary’s relationship (and engagement!)
2.Julie’s career (bringing beauty to everyone – just what our world needs, am I right?)
3.Baby Lulu (the sweetest addition to Sam and Charles’s brood)
4.Baby Calvin
5.Lucy and Oliver’s cross-continental romance (which, now that he moved to Haley is really more of a frequent cross-continental vacation to visit his family – I do love his sister’s husband, what a cook!). I forget; are they stopping in Paris after Cary and Anne’s wedding?
6.Dad’s retirement
7.AND… what?
It’s the end of the year, and I only count six. But that psychic was right about EVERYTHING! So… what is someone not telling me? As your mother, it’s my right to know!
Love,
MOM
* * *
There are so many people that I feel forever grateful to – for being in my life, supporting my dreams and helping me see this one through. I got incredible feedback and support from family and loved ones who read this – Bernice Capita, Kathy Sullivan, Alice Sullivan, Jaclyn Leibl-Cote, Damaris Sullivan, Linda Thomasian, Mary Ann Mazzone, Carol Diebold, Sean Kelly, Shelly Marcoccio, Lori Lemke, Lynne Kelly, Dominique Ferrari, Elisabeth Cote, Carola Leibl-Cote and Diana Ditto. Your support means more than you’ll ever know!
To my peers and professors at Emerson College – thank you for supporting my thesis project! Thank you to John Rodzvilla, Nicole Christopher, Scott A. Johnson, Erin Dionne, Evva Koyle, and Nora Chan for giving me advice on my book, writing career and being part of the reason my experience at Emerson was truly amazing. And I must give a huge shout out and “thank you” to Jessica Treadway, a mentor and friend who believed in Honeymoon Alone from my first submission and built my confidence in it over and over again.
Thank you, Marilyn Sowinski, for bringing Lucy to life through your amazing artwork and designs. Your creativity endlessly amazes me.
Thank you, Lisa Webster, for taking the time to edit my book; you helped shape it into something that I feel really proud of. Thank you to Martha Osmundson for final proofing and your enthusiasm and encouragement.
This was hard work all around. With four children, work, and writing (plus publishing), I know that I was only able to do this because of my incredible support system. Courtney Gaffney – I couldn’t do any of this without you. From the bottom of my heart, thank you for everything you do to support me and my family. Thank you, Lori Egan, for being here for me and helping my life feel a little less crazy.
I feel really blessed to come from a long line of strong women. I thank my grandmother, Alice Sullivan, for reading this novel during one of her trips to Florida, and calling me to encourage me to keep going and get it published. Your support fills me with pride. One of my very first readers was my grandmother, Bernice Capita. She has been in my corner for my entire life, loving the stories I tell and encouraging me with this book more than I ever dreamed possible. I would be lost without your guidance in my life.
I cannot thank my amazing sisterin- law, Amy Burbach, enough for reading and editing drafts of this book over and over. Your dedication to Lucy Gray shows in every page and your commitment to this project has meant the world to me. Thank you, Joshua Chelmo, my very best friend, for listening to me throughout this entire process (and for the past 20+ years). Thank you to my sister-in-law, Damaris Sullivan, for being the cheerleader of dreams that you are – for always inspiring people to take risks. And thank you, Shelly Marcoccio, for being like a second mom and giving me such valuable feedback throughout this whole process.
Thank you to my sister and brother – Jaclyn Leibl- Cote and Dan Sullivan – for always believing in me since the beginning. You’ve always supported my goal to write stories that matter to me. Jaclyn, your feedback was invaluable and I thank you for always taking my writing seriously.
Thank you to my incredible, wonderful husband, John. You are the best person that I know. You were my first reader, the person who told me to get my Masters even though I was pregnant with our fourth child, and you’re the one who has gently nudged me forward every step of the way. You’re the best. And our four little muses – Nathan, Wyatt, Charlie and Austin – think you’re pretty amazing, too. You are honestly everything to me.
And finally – thank you to my parents, Dan and Kathy Sullivan. I wouldn’t be who I am without you (and I could not have done any of this without you. I can’t stress that enough). My whole life, you have told me that I can do anything I set my mind to. Thank you for that! You have set the most incredible example for me – about what love is and what family is. You are both everything that is right in my world – the two people I still turn to constantly – and I love you both ‘tutu mun’.
Thank you for reading Honeymoon Alone. If you enjoyed it, please share it with friends, send a review and spread the word.
Nicole Macaulay is at work on her second novel, Then Comes Life, slated for 2023 release.
/nicolemacaulayauthor
@nicolemacaulaywriter
@nicmacaulay
www.nicmacaulay.com
Honeymoon Alone: A Novel Page 24