"Galian, I'm kissing you. Please wake up," I whispered through my tears. "Please wake up so I can tell you that I love you."
I pressed his forehead into the crook of my neck, wondering if the closeness would wake him. But he lay limp against me, his warm breath sticky on my chest. So I lay back with him and prayed with every inch of me that we hadn't survived this long—I hadn't fallen in love with him despite all my prejudices and hatred of his people—just for him to die in my arms.
Galian
I opened my eyes then squeezed them back together, the light splitting my already pounding head in two. I rubbed my forehead gingerly, registering the scab on the upper right temple. Squinting, I glanced around to register a rocky overhang, the softness under my head, the wool blanket covering my body.
My eyes opened again as memory rushed through me. "Well, that explains the headache," I mumbled to myself.
"Y-you're awake!" Theo's voice echoed from somewhere far away. Before I could respond, she was by my side, fussing and fretting over me as if truly concerned about my health. I looked up at her face, which was streaked with tears.
Tears? Had she been crying over me?
"I'm fine," I said, even though I wasn't really. "How long was I out?"
"I was so worried about you," she said, ignoring my question completely. She moved her fingertips across my skin as if they'd had plenty of practice. Even with my headache, my skin tingled at her touch.
"How's your head?" she asked.
"Hurts," I said, sitting up.
"Please, don't," she said, pushing me gently back down. "You need to rest. I'll be right back." She stood and stared at me for a moment, relief evident in her eyes, then disappeared out of the cave.
To my left, I noticed the black bag that Dr. Maitland had sent with me tossed on the ground. She had pulled out anything and everything left in it and scattered it around the cave. I reached over and picked up one of the small medicine packets and grumbled. Antacid wouldn't help me much.
She reappeared by my side with no less than a pound of rabbit meat. I smiled thinly, not the least bit hungry at the moment. She watched me as if she believed I'd pass out the second she looked away.
"Theo, I'll be fine," I assured her, leaning back into the mattress.
She didn't move, so I took the meat she was offering and took the smallest of bites to show her I was eating. The worry on her face eased slightly.
"Did you eat?" I asked.
She shook her head. "You need it more than—"
I cut her off and handed her the stick. "Eat. You look like hell."
She frowned as she gently took the food from me, and I could tell I'd said something wrong. But it was the truth—she was pale, there were dark bags under her eyes, and she looked...
Like she'd spent the past however-long-I-had-been-asleep scared that I was going to die. Theo had been worried about me all this time. Crying over my probably lifeless-looking body. I could just imagine her desperation, her fear at seeing me unconscious.
And I'd just woken up and said she looked ugly. Score one for the princeling.
"I...I'll go see if I can catch something else," she mumbled, standing up to leave me and my big mouth in the cave.
FOURTEEN
Theo
I stood outside the cave and rubbed the tear streaks off my face. I felt like a fool. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I'd expected Galian to wake up and...what? Sweep me into his arms? Tell me he loved me as much as I loved him? The idea was as laughable as my behavior had been over the past few hours.
I'd fallen for him, but what was to say he felt the same about me? Could I say to his face the same things I'd spoken to his sleeping form? What would his reaction be when I told him? Could I even summon the courage to tell him?
Then of course, there was the concern of what the hell was I thinking, falling in love with the son of my enemy?
Behind me, he crawled out of the cave, clutching his forehead and groaning. The urge to ask him if he was well enough to stand bubbled up, but I bit my tongue. He, too, looked like he wanted to say something to me, but didn't. The more time passed, the more idiotic I felt. Nothing had changed between us, and yet everything had changed for me.
"I caught enough food for today," I announced louder than I'd meant to.
"That's...good," he said, rubbing his head. "Find any painkillers while you were out there?"
"N-no," I said, glancing away. He'd given all he had to me during our first few days on the island. My embarrassment deepened that I'd considered Galian's attentiveness anything other than his doctorly duty. I suddenly needed to get away from him. "But I think I'll go fetch some water from...that place."
Galian glanced over, curious. I hadn't set foot near the laboratory since it burned to the ground, sending Galian to refill our water every few days.
"Do you want me to go with you?"
"Should you be moving around after taking such a fall, Doctor?" I asked, swallowing the princeling. I shouldn't tease him anymore. It was too close to flirting, and that needed to stop.
"There's water here," he said, picking up one of the plastic bottles. "Seems like this'll last a day or so."
I glanced up at the sky, grateful it was still overcast. "Might storm. Better to get it now than wait."
"Then wouldn't it be better for you to stay here?"
I glowered in his direction and he took a step back. I rationalized that if he were angry with me, he might be less friendly, and then I could begin to detangle my attachment to him. That, at least, would be easier than admitting feelings that he might not share.
I trudged toward the forest but, before I'd gone too far, he called my name. I turned only slightly to see what he wanted.
He stared at the ground and rubbed his head, though I wasn't sure if from pain or awkwardness. "Thanks for...well, for...looking after me."
"I was simply returning the favor," I snapped, turning back. "Now you've saved my life twice, and I've saved yours once."
"But you told me your name," he offered with a hint of amusement, and my heart jumped at the memory. "I thought we agreed that counted for something."
I kept walking. "It doesn't."
"Theo, I'm sorry I said you were ugly."
"What?" I finally spun around to look at him.
"I said you were ugly," he said, an adorably earnest look on his face. "When I woke up, I said you looked rough, and that was...uncalled for. You're obviously mad about that and—"
"I'm not mad at you for that," I blurted out and immediately regretted it. Being mad at him for something so petty would've been easier to explain, because I had no idea why I was angry at him at all.
"Then why are you mad?" Galian asked, a hint of a whine in his voice.
"I... Because you..." I stammered like an idiot. Angry at myself, I balled up my fist and exploded at him. "What the hell were you thinking, climbing up there? We have enough trouble staying alive without you trying to hasten our demise!"
He stared at me, shell-shocked.
"I'm going to get water," I finished, already regretting my words. "Try not to die before I get back, princeling."
Galian
Shame and embarrassment flooded my cheeks. Had I really reverted to the idiot princeling I'd been when I first landed on the island? Theo was right; I shouldn't have been so reckless. But I'd wanted to do something special for the both of us.
And now thanks to whatever had pissed her off, she could barely stand to be in the same cave as me.
I leaned against the cave and poked at the fire, rubbing my sore head and trying to block out the pain. I glanced at the pile of medicine on the ground and searched through it again, finding nothing of value. Still, the ache in my head was starting to ease from a pounding hammer to a dull thud, so I counted that as a win.
With my pain subsiding, I was now left with the uncomfortable knowledge of Theo's anger. It bothered me more than I would've thought possible, much like when I'd done something to disappoint
my mother. It wasn't simply her dislike—plenty of people disliked me, it went hand-in-hand with being a prince, but Theo was different. I'd finally earned her respect, and with one slip of my feet, I'd tossed it all away.
But, my brain asked, is her respect all I want?
I had grown to care for her very much. Our first day on the island, she hadn't believed I was a doctor, and to soothe my ego, I'd wanted to show her all I knew. What had started out as a deep-seated need to salve my wounded pride had turned into a genuine concern for her wellbeing.
She had awoken something in me—a need to be better than I was. It was no longer about being more than the "princeling," she made me want to return to my country to be a better leader, to right my father's wrongs. I had known what my forefathers' actions had done, but Theo had made those consequences real and tangible. The nameless prisoners I'd seen at Mael were human beings, the same way Theo lived and breathed and thought and cried.
I wanted the war to stop, for Rave to become a great country. To stop sending their children to war and start growing and thriving. If only because Rave was synonymous now with Theo, and I wanted all those things for her.
I felt safe with her. I had told her things I'd never told anyone else, not even my mother. Perhaps it was the sanctuary of the island, but she'd stirred some of my deepest secrets and fears, allowing them to come loose. I wanted her to see the whole of the person I was...because I'd fallen in love with the whole of her.
A long breath left my chest and my heart skipped a beat.
That was it then.
I loved her.
I loved Theo Kallistrate.
"Huh."
Theo
I knew that love made a person irrational, but my behavior was astonishing. I was angry for no reason, looking at him had taken me to the verge of tears, and my brain could barely keep two thoughts straight.
I laughed at myself. I must've really had it bad.
I used to scoff at the girls in my unit when they pronounced their love (usually along with their pregnancy). I hadn't been able to imagine a time when I could value something above my own survival and my country, but now...now my focus was on the both of us. I wanted him to survive more than myself.
I glanced back the way I had come, hoping that Galian might have thought to forgive my lunacy and come after me. I knew I would have to face him eventually and apologize for my horrible behavior. Perhaps he'd just forgive me and not ask me to explain. We could go back to simply surviving and not have to worry about things like whether or not I loved him and if I could ever tell him.
In any case, it didn't do either of us any good for me to lose my head. I had learned that lesson the hard way once already, and it...
I looked around for the tree marks and saw none.
"Shit, kallistrate," I growled to myself.
I had gotten myself lost, yet again, because I was too worried about things like love and Galian to pay attention to where I was going.
"How I survived nineteen years is a God-damned miracle," I hissed to no one in particular.
I wasn't even sure how long I had been walking at that point. I glanced up at the sky, noting the direction of the sun. That, at least, could get me closer to the shore, eventually either closer to—
I heard movement behind me.
"Galian?"
No answer.
I glanced up at the sun again. If I kept pushing forward towards it—
Another movement caught my attention.
"Galian, if that's you, I'm sorry," I said, hoping that it was Galian and not something else entirely. "I overreacted and shouldn't have yelled at you. Let's head back to the cave and—"
The soft growl from the trees sent my hopes nosediving into my stomach. A wolf emerged from the darkness, creeping towards me with a hungry look that said it hadn't had a good meal in a while. I swallowed hard and took a step back, bumping into a tree.
I glanced up and saw a nearby branch close enough for me to grab. With an eye on the approaching beast, I wrapped my hands around the branch.
The dog lunged, and I scrambled just out of its reach.
It snapped and jawed at me, jumping as I climbed to a higher branch. I was now nearly ten feet off the ground, all of my extremities pulled tightly to me, and praying to God that dogs couldn't climb.
The dog put both paws on the branch and snapped its jaws at me, drool dripping from white fangs. But as much as it jumped, it couldn't reach me on the branch.
My only options were praying Galian would show up and do something to scare it away, or hoping the dog would get bored and leave me.
I heard movement in the brush and swallowed. "G-Galian? Is that you?"
Three more dogs emerged.
"Fuck."
Galian
I debated going after her all afternoon, but it wasn't the best idea to move too much until my headache had subsided. Instead, I puttered around our camp, putting all my medical supplies back in the bag, arranging our mattress and blankets, tending to the fire. The busywork made me even more restless, especially as the hours ticked on.
By the time the sun was low in the sky, I knew either Theo was really, really pissed at me, or something was wrong. Either way, I was tired of waiting around. I made sure to tuck our knife and flare gun into my pocket, covered the fire, and set off, calling Theo's name.
I plodded along the path of the marked trees, calling every few minutes for Theo. I wondered what I was going to say when I finally found her. Was she really that pissed off at me? And if so, how could I fix it? Probably grovel, if I'd had to guess. I'd never had to beg for forgiveness before, so I wasn't really sure what it entailed. Knowing Theo, she would make me work for it.
I grinned. Challenge accepted.
Above all, I was pretty sure that I was going to tell her that I loved her. After all, we were surviving day to day, and it wasn't smart to keep secrets like that. Not that I'd ever been one for keeping anything to myself anyway.
The problem was that I couldn't find her.
I walked all the way to the laboratory using the marks I'd made on the trees, and there was no sign of her. By the time I walked back to the old campsite, it was dangerously dark.
I cupped my hands around my mouth and called for Theo again, waiting for the echo of my voice to die down and listening for her reply. When there was none, I considered my options. She might be back at the campsite, but that was unlikely. She might be lost, which was more plausible. Or she could be hurt, which meant I needed to find her before something else did.
Going any further without a light was a bad idea. I could just hear Theo's response if she found me traipsing around in the dark.
"Princeling, you can't see in the dark. What were you thinking? Idiot."
Though I could spend the night there at the old campsite, I didn't want to be separated from her for the night. I stumbled around for a moment, and my foot caught on something—the old, gross blanket we'd used before we'd found better ones in the laboratory.
I quickly made a small fire in our old pit and used the light to find a large stick. Gingerly, I wrapped the blanket around the stick and lit it on fire. It burned pretty nicely for me, but I knew I wouldn't have much time before it went out.
Holding the light above my head, I braved the darkening woods, calling Theo's name.
Theo
Three dogs had turned into five, and now what I presumed was the entire pack of Raven-eating beasts sat at the foot of the tree, salivating and waiting for me to come down. To make matters worse, the sun was gone, and night had fallen, leaving my options limited to simply stay in the tree forever or try to figure something else out.
I'd called for Galian until my voice was hoarse, but I must've been on the other side of the island, or, worse, he was still angry with me for yelling at him and had given up. At this point, I was simply hoping he wouldn't come stumbling into this mess.
I pulled off a nearby limb and threw it as hard as I could. Three of the dogs left, b
ut the rest of the pack didn't budge. The dim light reflected off their dripping fangs and I sighed.
"Theo!"
"Galian!" I cried, nearly falling off my perch in the tree.
"Theo! Where are you?"
"Galian, get out of here!" I screamed as the wolves perked up.
"Theo!" His voice came closer, and I saw an orange glow in the distance. "Theo, where are you? I'm sorry for—"
"Galian!" I screamed as more wolves stood, noses twitching and soft growls rumbling from below. "Galian, you have to listen—go back to the camp and stay there!"
He appeared next to my tree and took a step back, the dwindling light of his torch illuminating his face. "Theo, where are you?"
"Up here," I said dully. "You were supposed to go away."
"And what? Leave you for wolf-food?" He stuck his torch, now just red embers on the stick, into the ground. The fire was enough of a distraction to keep the wolves at bay as he shimmied up the tree. I grabbed him by the back of the jumpsuit and yanked him up onto the branch with me.
"You okay?" I asked, brushing my hair out of my face.
"Are you?"
"I've been stuck in a tree all day, so I've been better," I said with a small laugh. "Why aren't you back at camp?"
"Missed you too much." It could've been the dark, but there was a sparkle in his eye that I'd never seen before. "I don't think I can sleep without you watching over me."
"That's sweet but," I glanced down at the circling wolves, reinvigorated with the scent of new blood, "now what?"
"We could stay here. It's a nice night, the company is great..."
"If you count the fifteen bloodthirsty animals, sure." I surveyed him, curious and a bit nervous about this new attitude of his. "What's gotten into you? Are you still concussed?"
He simply grinned. "So after all we've been through, you're going to let a pack of wolves get you down?"
The Complete Madion War Trilogy Page 14