by Heather Long
“Don’t do it again.” It was all he said before he turned to look at me.
“Are we done with the fighting part?” I had to know because the need was still right there, and based on the hard length of Alfred’s erection pressing against my stomach, I wasn’t the only one feeling it.
“Oh yeah,” Fin said and headed straight toward us. “But I think we need some place more defensible than this if we’re all going to play.”
Oh.
Hell yes.
CHAPTER 12
“Just make sure that the make-up sex always lasts longer than the fights.” - Anonymous
F rom the dark and gloomy confines of Maddox’s cave—after they replaced the huge stone slab Alfred had taken down—to the sunnier location of the island with its sweet little cottage that Rogue had taken me to before, we whisked from one side of the world to the other. From winter to almost a balmy kind of summer. From cold to warm. From night to day. Or maybe it had been day there. My hours were all sort of running together.
Alfred lifted my hand and pressed his lips to my palm before he said, “Sweep the island, check the security. Fin, reinforce the wards with Rogue. Then come find us.”
While none of them argued, Maddox grumbled a little. They hurried away, and for the first time since I fled them, I found myself alone with Alfred. He let out a slow breath and then met my gaze. “Worried, Hellion?”
Lifting my chin, I shrugged. “Nope.”
He raised his brows. “Really?”
I swore my toes curled from the sheer amount of sensuality he managed to imbue in that single word. When he slid his hand around my throat, I smiled. “Really. If you want to spank me, spank me. If you want to scold me for taking off on you, scold me. If you’re going to give me hell, bring it. I can handle you.”
Laughing softly, he tightened his grip without actually squeezing and tugged me to him. “Yes, I think you can.” When his mouth covered mine, I let out a little sigh, then his tongue swept in to duel with mine. Despite the gentleness of his hand on my throat and the way he leaned into me, possessiveness threaded that kiss that demanded obedience and offered so much. Heat sizzled through my system as I leaned into the him.
Around us, the breeze pushed at me, and where I’d been chilled before in the sweatshirt, now I was too hot. I tugged away, and he frowned as he lifted his head, but as soon as I started to lift my shirt, he smiled and pulled it up and over until I was just in the tank top. In the dappled sunlight beneath the trees, my skin didn’t seem to be glowing, but then it brightened as he traced his fingers down my arm.
“I really don’t get this,” I said, and then extended both arms in front of me so I could turn them back and forth. The glow intensified as he ran his hands down my arms and then caught my hands in his. The dark fire sparking over him earlier surged back into the present and wreathed him once more.
The effect made my skin tingle everywhere we touched. “I’ve only ever seen this on other angels, Hellion.”
Angels.
I snorted.
At the inelegant sound, he chuckled and pulled me to him. Wrapping me in his arms, he lifted me up, and the tingling seemed to vibrate over me like we’d been dropped inside of a bell. The sensation swirled around us as I stared behind him at the wings of fire stretching out. And fuck it, I reached for one, and Alfred froze in place when I ran my fingers along the edge.
There was no heat, just…I wanted to say electricity. It sizzled against my palm, but there was no pain. His whole expression shifted as I teased my fingers over what almost felt like a bone and yet wasn’t. “Does this hurt?”
“No,” he said slowly, but his eyes didn’t carry the same message. If anything, he looked…stunned.
The wings flexed, and he tilted his head before he slid a hand up my back, and I swear it was like playing the game of Operation. The bzzt of sensation that went through me had my eyes widening, and I shivered.
“Does that hurt, Hellion?” The amusement in his voice as he tossed the question back at me helped pull me out of my stupor as I shook my head. “But it feels strange?”
“Very… Do I have wings?”
“You do,” he murmured. Then stroked his hand over something again, and that shiver seemed to resonate through my system and I swore the air around us brightened. “Beautiful wings of shadow and silvery flame.”
“Alfred…what the hell am I?”
“Ours,” he reminded me as he began walking again. Only this time, there was no rush and he kept me close. The longer he held me like this, the more the current seemed to settle. “I told you that already.”
“I meant what am I? You’re mine and I’m yours.” The possessive flare in his eyes at my admission made me smile. “Yes, I’m stubborn, but I can say it. I even feel different now. But the point is…what happened to me? I don’t seem to need to even feed as I did before.”
We had arrived at the little bungalow, and I was ridiculously happy to see the place. I’d been here, what? A handful of hours? And still…it felt like coming home, even if it wasn’t the keep.
“Tell me about the need to feed,” Alfred prompted me as he carried me inside. He didn’t slow as he made his way to the bedroom. Unlike the keep, the bed here hadn’t been as large, but I was less concerned about the where than the who to be honest, so I let Alfred make the call on this. He set me on the bed and began pulling off my shoes. I barely even remembered putting them on.
“It’s just different. I mean…I know you want me, I can feel it. But the lust that would usually leave me hungry, it’s…just not there. Which is a little strange.” It was a lot strange.
“Hellion.” The soft command in his voice had me raising my eyebrows, but the gentle stroke of his hand up my calf soothed as much as his demand irked. “When was the last time you fed?”
“From you…” I thought about it. Maddox and I hadn’t…had we? It all kind of blurred together.
“You fed from my blood. When was the last time you fed on lust?”
He reached for the pants I had on and began to peel them down as I squinted at him. Honestly, I wasn’t sure. There had been a time I’d never seemed so full. Yet even when I’d left, the hunger hadn’t plagued me. Not like it had before. Still, I’d been able to ignite it in others, such as I had during my escape.
“The daeva,” I said slowly as he skated his fingers along my sides to my abdomen and then paused, one hand over it. “When I was in Dallas, when Fin found me, there was a daeva and it incited a huge fight. It was trying to cloud Fin, use him… It doesn’t matter. The point is, I was a lot stronger, and I fed on it and fed it back to itself.”
Essentially.
“Did you feed on it properly though?” He still knelt next to the bed, his right hand curved against my abdomen, and more than once, his gaze dipped to it.
“You’re excited.” Probably not the answer he was looking for. His dark eyes lifted to meet my gaze as he spread his fingers, and the tingling awareness of him prickled over me. “About the…you know.”
“Baby?” He cocked his head to the side as though trying to understand me. Good luck with that. I didn’t understand me at this point, or why my eyes kept getting hot. I was not a crier by nature. The fact that tears kept trying to escape was making me a little crazy.
Okay. A lot crazy. “Yes, the baby.” I stared at him. “I had a birth control spell. This shouldn’t have happened, and then boom, you kill me to make me better and faster and stronger than before, then bing, bang, boom, Bob’s your uncle, there’s a bun in the oven and I’m glowing like some solar power day pop.” The words spilled out of me in a rant, but Alfred didn’t laugh at me.
If anything, he just continued to look at me rock steady and gorgeous as he stroked my stomach with his thumb. “I think you’re beautiful.” He said it so simply, like we were actually discussing the weather. “Beautiful. Over the top. With a mind I can’t parse and I hope to never fully understand, because you delight me.”
Goddammit, the t
ears swelled up again. “Stop it.”
“Stop what, Hellion?”
“Stop being nice. Be my asshole.”
He chuckled and then scooped me up and moved me higher on the bed before settling me down and then leaning over me. The weight of him coupled with the faint roughness of his clothes settled me more than I cared to admit.
“But I’m trying so very hard not to be, Hellion,” he said in the most sensuously soothing tone. “You’ve been through a great deal, and I forget sometimes how difficult the transition can be. For me, it was so long ago.”
“And now you have wings again.” They’d faded while we spoke, and even mine seemed to be gone. Which was probably a good thing. I didn’t want to think about crushing them while lying on them, or worse, having them fall asleep or wake up. How fucking weird would that be.
His expression shifted minutely. If I hadn’t been watching for it, I might have missed it entirely, but the lines at his eyes tightened and his mouth firmed.
“That’s a good thing, right?” He’d described how he lost his wings. How he’d fallen. The way they’d been seared from his body.
“I don’t know, Hellion,” he admitted after too long a silence. Long enough, I reached up to press my hand over his heart. “I don’t know. I am…amazed that they are there. Yet they are different. So perhaps not a bad thing at all.”
“I think they’re beautiful.” No lie. His arrival in Maddox’s cave had been epic. The way the dark fire had danced over him… A shiver radiated up my entire body as I smiled, and I swore the light in his eyes began to shimmer.
“You’re glowing again,” he murmured, and I rolled my eyes.
“That’s gonna get old.”
“No,” he whispered, cupping my cheek in one hand. “I don’t think so… Tell me though…does it hurt? At all?”
I shook my head. “I feel good. Confused maybe. No maybe…” Wow. The words just slipped right out like I had to amend even the idea I might be lying immediately. It wasn’t a lie. “I feel…weird. But not bad weird, just bizarre weird, like there’s all these feelings and I don’t know what to do with them. I love you.”
Yeah, that was just right out there.
“I love them and I love…I love being with all of you, but that’s not me. Or it used to not be me. Maybe it wasn’t me because you weren’t there and I didn’t want to be this. I fought it so hard, and now I’m happy with this.” I frowned as his whole expression softened. “Don’t look at me like that. I’m still mad that you did it the way you did it, even if I get it. ’Cause I’m stubborn and I didn’t want to listen and if I had my way, I’d have never gone through with it and I’d probably be dead or a shadow demon right now.”
I shuddered as everything in me went icy at the thought, and the light in the room vanished.
“I would never have let that happen to you,” he promised me with such ferocity, I believed him.
“But that’s just it, you did this to me for you—for them. But you didn’t do it for me. Or maybe you did.” A tear splashed out of my eyes as I squeezed them shut, but I didn’t want to let go of him long enough to wipe them away. “I don’t know. I don’t even know what all of this is. This…life used to be simple.”
The fact that his smile grew at that last comment made me growl, but I didn’t get another word out before he kissed me. This wasn’t like earlier kisses where he demanded and took control. No, this was full of decadent sweetness. I swore my heart grew with every stroke of his tongue. When he slid his knee between my legs and then eased himself down until I could cradle him, the sheer gentleness threatened to overwhelm me.
Then I was fucking crying again. Alfred didn’t say a word, just kissed the tears away, and when he gazed down at me again, there was an astonishing amount of tenderness in the black flames of his eyes. Holy shit, there were black flames in his eyes, and the room brightened again. I didn’t even have to look to know it was me.
With careful thumbs, he wiped away the tears. “I’ve never felt this way about anyone, Hellion. Not the way I feel about you.”
I swallowed, but when I would have opened my mouth to say something, he pressed his thumb to my lips. I wrapped my mouth around his thumb and sucked it lightly. His smile edged a little wider and his eyes flared, but he schooled his expression.
There was my stern asshole.
“I will never feel about another the way I do about you. You are stubborn. Impulsive. Wild. Reckless. Beautiful. Fierce. Adorable. Perfect.”
I raised my eyebrows, even as I nipped his thumb. He may not want me to respond, but that was a whole lot of tenderness spilling out of him.
“I have no idea how to deal with this either,” he admitted. “But I’m not going anywhere. So if you need to cry, you cry. If you need to rage, rage. If it involves clawing me up or me fucking you until you can’t walk, we can do that, too.”
Laughter erupted at that mental image, because yes please and thank you.
“Just know that we will figure all of this out, and while I will never tell him this, Fin is very skilled with emotions. So I’m sure he will say the thing that will make this all better.”
“See,” came Fin’s voice from somewhere behind Alfred, along with a thump sound like he’d smacked someone. “I’m the glue. I get this. Fiona’s in love with us, and while she’s been a succubus her whole life, attachment is not something she’s ever allowed herself to have. But she can have it here. In fact…”
He appeared at the edge of the bed and grinned at me over Alfred’s shoulder.
“I insist you be attached, Beautiful. I’ve waited so many lifetimes for you. There’s nothing we won’t do for you or the baby you’re having. Bets on it being mine?”
Alfred sent his gaze skyward, then said, “I promise, it seemed like a good idea to transition him at the time.”
“Holy shit,” Fin gasped out, grabbing at his chest. “Alfred’s making jokes.”
Maddox’s laughter, deep and booming, rumbled through the room. He wasn’t alone. Rogue’s chuckle was there, and Fin’s smile grew as our gazes locked. Alfred let out a soft grunt and then rolled off me, but before I could get too chilly, he settled on the bed and pulled me into his lap until my back was against his chest and he could nip my throat gently. It was the barest scrape of teeth.
My nipples tensed, whether from the cold or the fact three sets of hot-eyed gazes scorched over me, I had no idea. And I really didn’t care. I swore the light in the room grew brighter.
“She loves us,” Alfred said simply, and Maddox’s smile turned to a full-fledged grin. Rogue seemed content, but Fin was smug.
“Of course she does,” he said, as if it was clear as day. “She’s radiant with it.”
I groaned and struck out with my foot. It caught him in the chest, and he slid back a couple of feet, still laughing, the little shit. Rogue chuckled. “Not as taken by your charms as you think,” he taunted gently before catching my foot and taking a seat on the edge of the bed. “Little sváss, I don’t care what the prophecy says or what your life was before, only as long as neither ever hurts you.”
My heart squeezed.
“I have no idea how to parent nor do any of those here. We’ll figure it out.” He stroked my calf. “I know you’re scared, all the bravado in the world can’t hide that from me.” His pure blue eyes held me captive. “But you’re not just a succubus any longer. I don’t think you ever were. You fought your own nature to be more. You stood up and demanded to be counted. You have never let anyone put you in a box.”
Well…I wouldn’t go that far.
Closing his hand around my ankle, he pressed his thumb to my pulse. “We can handle anything, but you have to let us help you, whether it’s rescuing those idiots or addressing your fears. Or defending us all.”
I ducked my chin at the last. The need to protect them was a fierce flame inside of me. More, I just wanted to be right here with them. No more fights, no more separations or threats. But if they came for us…
“Agreed,” Maddox said, his gaze seeking mine when I looked up. He stood at the end of the bed, arms folded and looking every inch as ferocious and grim as he had the day he walked into my cell. “I won’t take you away from them again, Kitten. I’m not leaving your side, either. Some things…I cannot change.”
“I don’t want you to change.” Stretching out a hand to Fin and then to Maddox, I waited until they moved to grasp them before I glanced at Rogue, then back up at Alfred. “I like the fighting and the making up and the pushing and the passion and the craziness. I even like that you’re an asshole.”
He sighed at me, but it was far more indulgent than it was aggravated. “Good. Because I rather doubt I can change all that much, Hellion. Though for you, I’m willing to try.”
“And on that note,” Fin said. “We’re just going to say we witnessed a moment for the ages—Alfred saying he will try something he isn’t positive he’ll be good at.”
There were groans and laughter, and then Fin let go of my hand to grasp my cheeks. He kissed me, slow and sweet, then released me before Maddox swooped in to kiss me. His held a bite and heat and an element of apology that filled my eyes with tears again. Finally, when he lifted his head, Rogue studied me.
“It’s us,” he murmured.
“What is?” I asked, licking my lips.
“What you need,” he said slowly, and my heart did a little fist bump with my ribs. “You need us.”
Alfred tightened his grip on me. “What did you tell me about succubi? They only fed on lust, and they couldn’t form lasting relationships because of it?”
I swallowed, and then nodded. “We’re terrible parents.” My chest tightened. “And not great mates—I mean, we don’t mate.”
“But you do, Kitten,” Maddox rumbled, and there was something so pleased in his voice and possessive that I had to laugh.
“You’re a hybrid, Beautiful. You’re not a succubus only anymore. I don’t think you ever were. I think you were always meant for more.” Then he went thoughtful.