by Sarah Hill
“I was thinking mashed. I make a pretty kickin’ gravy with pork chop drippings,” he said, as he added the chops to the pan.
“Sounds good.” Rylie grabbed a pot and filled it with water before placing it on the stove. Going back to the sink she piled the peeled potatoes into a bowl and carried them over, allowing them to slide into the water.
Hiding behind the wall that divided the kitchen from the living room, Maysen wrapped an arm around her waist and pulled her towards him. He nipped at her neck, sending waves through her body again. “You smell good,” he whispered into her ear.
She closed her eyes as his lips roamed down her neck causing her breath to catch. Turning her face toward his, she opened her mouth to receive another kiss she was sure would leave her lips feeling bruised. His hands traveled over her body, feeling his hand grip her left butt cheek, she pushed against his chest and leaned away from him. “We need to stop doing that.”
“I thought you liked it. My mistake,” he said, releasing her and looking back at the pan.
“That’s exactly why we need to stop,” she said, touching his arm. “It’ll just make it harder to stop.”
“Okay,” he said, his jaw tightening as he flipped the pork chops.
Guilt wrecked her stomach and ruined her appetite as she went to set the table. She could still feel his lips and hands all over her and allowed her eyes to roam over his backside while she laid silverware next to the plates.
“Sure does smells good in here,” Norm said, interrupting her thoughts as he entered the kitchen. “What do you have going on over there,” he asked, nodding at Maysen’s pan.
“Fried pork chops and mashed potatoes,” Maysen answered. “We should probably do green beans. Hey, Rylie,” he said, turning towards her.
“I’ll get them going,” she said, setting the silverware in a pile on the table.
“Thank you both for doing this. We’ve been missing a good home-cooked meal,” Norm said.
“Anytime, Norm. I enjoy the company,” Maysen said, grinning.
Norm pointed at the table and said, “Rylie, you’re wasting your time girl. Del can’t sit at the table.”
Rylie turned from the can she was opening. “Right. I wasn’t thinking.”
Norm chuckled and left the kitchen.
Maysen turned to look at her and with a smirk said, “I’m glad I can still make your brain foggy.”
She rolled her eyes as she brought the green beans over to the stove. “Funny.”
Twenty minutes later they were all seated in the living room, something unheard of in the Green household. Del never allowed food out of the kitchen unless it was going outside.
“How’d I do, Del?” Maysen asked, from the recliner beside Norm’s.
“Mmmm, uh hmmmm,” Del murmured, as she chewed her food.
“She approves,” Norm said, with a smile that touched his eyes. Rylie could see how happy he was to be home.
“Excited to sleep in your own bed tonight, Norm?” Rylie asked.
“You don’t even know,” Norm said, shaking his head.
Swallowing, Del looked over at him and said, “That’s why you got this bed, isn’t it? So you’d have the bed all to yourself?”
“That’s a bonus I hadn’t thought of, but no. I was thinking of your comfort, my dear,” he said, taking a bite of his pork chop. “Mmmm, Maysen you can come cook for us any time you need company.”
“This isn’t better than mine,” Del said, prickling.
“I didn’t say that, but you won’t be cooking for a while and my cooking isn’t close to edible,” Norm said, using the soft voice he utilized when trying to sweet talk her.
Maysen looked down at his plate and laughed. His dimples were deep caverns triggering a smile from Rylie.
“What are you smiling about?” Del asked, looking over at her.
Norm and Maysen looked up and stared in Rylie’s direction. Maysen met her eyes and raised his eyebrows in question. He was totally clueless of the affect he had on the female species. It was one of his many attributes.
“Nothing. Just enjoying my dinner companions.”
“Tomorrow we’ll have a couple more to add to our party,” Del exclaimed, her face lighting up.
A thrill went through Rylie at the thought of having her family here with her. “Yes, we will!” she said, with a smile. Feeling his eyes on her, she looked over in Maysen’s direction. A small smile briefly flicked across his lips before it turned into a hard line.
“Maysen, you can finally meet -,” Del started, then stopped herself and looked down at her plate.
“I would love to meet both Spencer and Alex,” Maysen said, avoiding Rylie’s eyes and taking a drink of milk.
“You don’t need to feel obligated,” Del said, trying to save herself. “I know you’re pretty busy.”
“Never too busy for family,” he replied, standing with his plate. “I’m going to start the dishes.”
“Maysen, I’ll do those. You did most the cooking,” Rylie said, standing.
“I don’t mind,” he said going into the kitchen.
Rylie sighed and looked over at Del and Norm. “Did you want me to take your dishes?” she asked.
“Please. Thank you, sweetie,” Norm said, grabbing Del’s and passing them to Rylie.
Maysen was already filling the sink. Soap suds were peeking over the top. He looked over at her, his face blank before turning back and dropping some dishes into the water.
“Let me do these, Maysen. You’ve done so much already,” she said, her voice soft.
“What do you want me to do, Rylie?” he asked, turning off the water.
“What do you mean?”
“When Spencer gets here. Did you want me to make an excuse with Del and Norm so I’m not here for dinner? I just want to know where your head is at,” he said, dragging his teeth against his bottom lip.
“I’m not going to tell you not to come,” she answered.
“Okay, then I’ll be here.”
“Okay, just -,”
“Keep my hands and lips to myself?” he interrupted, looking at her from the corner of his eyes.
“Please.”
He nodded. “Will do. You got these?” he asked, motioning towards the sink.
“Yeah. Go get some rest. Thank you for everything.”
He left the kitchen to say goodbye to the Greens and then slipped out while her back was turned. She watched him walk out the gate. He didn’t turn to look back towards the kitchen window where he knew she stood.
October 18, 2010 ~ Afternoon
Rylie thought her heart would jump out of her throat when she saw Alex burst through the airport gate and come running for her. He jumped into her arms and squeezed his arms around her neck like his life depended on it.
“Alex, sweetheart! I’ve missed you so much!” she said, covering his face in kisses.
“I missed you too, mommy!” he cried, burying his face in her shoulder.
“Oh, shhhh. My sweet boy, don’t cry. We’re together again,” she said, running her hand over his hair.
Spencer walked up and put his arm around her waist as he kissed the top of her head. “I have missed you,” he whispered.
Rylie crushed herself and Alex against Spencer’s chest and breathed in his cologne. “Oh, my god, Spence. I can’t believe you’re finally
here,” she said, her voice cracking.
He wrapped them both tightly in his arms and said, “I love you, Rye. Having you so far away from me made me realize how much I’ve taken us for granted. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologize,” she said, tears streaking down her cheeks. “I’m as much to blame. We’ve both let life get in the way.”
“Mommy, look,” Alex said, tears glistening on his cheeks. “I got a new freckle!”
Unable to keep the laugh inside, she snorted and said, “Yes you do! What are we going to name him?” she asked, setting him down. Spencer took her hand and they started towards the luggage area
&nb
sp; “I’ve been thinking about it and we haven’t got a Bob yet, do we?” he asked, his face screwed up in concentration.
“Bob?” she asked, with a laugh. “I don’t believe we do. Bob, it is.”
“He watched Bob the Builder cartoons on the flight here,” Spencer mumbled into her ear.
“Awe. I see.” She grinned at her husband. “I’d forgotten how gorgeous you are,” she said, looking up at him dreamily.
“Well, I couldn’t forget your face,” he said, kissing her hand. “Tell me what you’ve been up to. Until your call yesterday, I hadn’t heard from you in a couple days.”
Dread dropped into her stomach. “Oh, Spence. I’m sorry! I was so busy, I hadn’t even realized,” she started.
“Stop. It’s okay. I’m not mad. I know it’s been hectic.” He grabbed his suitcase from the baggage reclaim and then waited for Alex’s to come around.
“Well, as you can imagine, Del is happy to be home.”
“I’m sure Norm is too. It’s been a while since he slept in a real bed,” he said, handing Alex’s suitcase to her.
“I want to pull my own,” Alex said, grabbing the handle.
“Okay,” Rylie said, ruffling his hair. “You got his hair cut.”
“Yes, ma’am. You can now see those gorgeous blues.”
“I thought we’d make a trip to the zoo before we head back. It’ll give us a little more time together and I want you all to myself for a bit,” she said, squeezing his arm.
“Sounds good to me. What do you think, Alex?” he asked.
“I vote yes!” he exclaimed. “Can we get ice cream?”
“Ice Cream, cotton candy, whatever you want,” Rylie said, smiling down at his sweet face. “Tell me Mr. Tompkins, how far did you get in The Sorcerer’s Stone?”
Alex lit up. “We finished it! Daddy brought The Chamber of Secrets with us!”
“I’m impressed,” she said, raising her eyebrows in Spencer’s direction.
He shrugged and puffed out his chest. “Just trying to make our boy happy,” he said, staring ahead.
Rylie smiled to herself. She knew he was enjoying the story as much as Alex was. She happily listened as Alex excitedly told her about his time alone with his dad. They packed the suitcases into the trunk of the car and made their way to the zoo.
Rylie and Spencer walked hand in hand as they strolled through the zoo and watched Alex talk to the monkey’s, roar with the lions and sing The Bare Necessities while he danced in front of the bear habitat. It was a gorgeous afternoon with the sun warming the crisp fall air and having her family with her again gave Rylie the clarity she was needing.
Spencer grabbed some popcorn and a Pepsi to share with Rylie and a cotton candy for Alex with the promise to stop and buy ice cream to take back to Del and Norm’s.
As Alex fed the goats in the petting area, Rylie sat with Spencer under a tree and watched. “I’m so glad you’re here, love,” she said, kissing his lips twice.
“I am too. I was getting worried,” he replied, looking down at his hands.
“You were?”
“Knowing you were here with an old boyfriend. It can make crazy things go through your head.”
“I know,” she said, biting her lip. “Listen, Spence. I’m not going to lie. I’ve been on an emotional roller coaster this past week.”
“And?” he asked, frowning.
“I’d like to tell you about my past, including Maysen. Are you okay with that?”
He nodded, but didn’t say anything. Rylie told him everything. About her mom, how she met Del and how Maysen had protected her and built her a treehouse so she had a place to write. She admitted that she knew she loved him before he admitted his feelings to her. She explained how in her teenage mind he was the one and eventually gave him her virginity.
“We made plans to spend the rest of our lives together. He hadn’t proposed, but I think we both assumed it would happen,” she said, unable to look him in the eyes.
“I don’t understand. How did you end up in New York?” he asked. He had patiently allowed her no interruption up to this point.
“You knew I got that scholarship.”
“I did.”
“I wasn’t going to take it. I could go to college anywhere to get a degree,” she said pausing. He waited for her to continue. “Something happened the night of our graduation party,” she said, taking a deep breath. Rylie went on to explain the party, the fire she came home to, and finding the backpack and lighter and what she wrongly assumed happened between Maysen and Maddie. “He told me had a surprise for me at the treehouse and left the party before I did. When I saw the fire and Maddie in his arms,” she paused again, shaking her head. “I thought the love he showed me all those years was a cruel joke he’d been playing on me and he was ending the whole charade with a grand finale. I never spoke to him or Maddie again. I didn’t walk at graduation. I left Del a note and left in the middle of the night. I called Mrs. Matthews and took the scholarship.”
Spencer stared at her with his mouth open. “Why wouldn’t you tell me any of this?”
“I wanted to, but I wanted to leave all that betrayal behind me.”
“It’s so important though. I understand so much more about you now,” he said, grabbing her hands and squeezing. “You didn’t have the upbringing I’d imagined. I’m glad you misread the situation or I would never have met you.”
“You hated me when you first met me,” she laughed.
“No, I didn’t. I thought you were beautiful.”
“You have a funny way of showing it,” she said, narrowing her eyes at him.
“I didn’t think someone so pretty would take anything seriously. I admit I didn’t believe you wanted to learn. I assumed you were depending on your looks to captivate me so that I’d do all the work.”
“You did not,” she said, softly hitting his arm and smiling.
“I swear, I did,” he said, a grin spreading over his face. “Once I knew you were willing to do your part, my perception of you changed.”
She smirked. “I love you, Spencer Johnson.”
“Mommy! Can I go down the slide?” Alex called, pointing at the giraffe slide.
“Just be careful!” she called. He clapped his hands and ran to the slide.
“He was pretty easy. I’m not saying what you do is easy, but I liked hanging out with him,” Spencer said, watching Alex climb up the rungs of the slide.
“Did you pick up an English accent?”
“Not yet, but I feel it coming on,” he said, returning his gaze to her. He reached out and stroked her cheek before leaning in and kissing her. They weren’t like the urgent kisses Maysen had given her. It was slow and warm and set the butterflies off in her stomach.
“Hmmm,” she sighed. “I sure missed you.”
“So,” he said, exhaling and sitting back against the bench. “I feel like there’s more to your story. Should I be worried?”
“No, but it won’t be easy to hear,” she said, a deep line forming between her eyes.
“I figured. Let’s get it over with,” he said, unenthusiastically.
“Maysen explained what really happened that night when I saw him at the hospital. I felt terrible. Turns out he wasn’t the one who needed to ask for forgiveness, it was me. I guess I can be rash sometimes.”
“You think?” he said, with a wink.
“I hope I never make you feel the way I made him feel,” she said, with a grimace.
“Keep talking and we’ll see what happens.”
A sick feeling coursed through her. “We hung out a bit and talked about the past. I visited some of my favorite spots with him and my emotions got all jumbled.”
Spencer’s stare hardened a bit as he bit his cheek. “Rylie, please tell me you didn’t sleep with him.” His voice sounded pained and hollow.
“No, of course not!” she said, her eyes widening.
He exhaled and closed his eyes. “Thank God,” he whispered.
�
�I did kiss him,” she said, dropping her head and adding, “more than once.”
Spencer inhaled through his nose and held it before exhaling. Rylie waited for him to say something. The silence was killing her, but she didn’t want to speak too soon. Instead, she turned to watch Alex playing on the slide. He was so carefree and happy. ‘Spence, please forgive me,’ she thought to herself.
“You still have some feelings for this guy then,” Spencer said, breaking the silence.
“It’s hard to explain,” she said, turning back to him.
“Try,” he said, his voice coming out gravelly.
Taking a deep breath, she said, “I’m not sure if everyone feels the same way about their first love, but mine was good. It’s such an odd feeling and I’m not sure I can explain it in a way you’ll understand. Imagine you and I being in love since childhood and something happens that causes us to be torn apart. One minute you feel like I’m someone you can’t live without and the next I’m gone. No explanation. There’s no talking things out, I’m just gone.” She looked at him and asked, “Would you feel an emptiness?”
Rolling his tongue against his cheek, he nodded. “I would.”
“Keep that image in your head and then imagine you try to move on with your life. You meet someone new and at first, it’s hard to ignore the echo of the love you had for me. Eventually, my memory fades far enough into the background you find yourself extremely happy with your new love. Move forward fifteen years or so and you have a child and you can’t imagine life without your wife and child. You’re happy. Then your past crash lands right in front of you. I appear when you least expect it and you learn that things weren’t as they seemed when we parted. There’s no foundation for all the bad feelings you had and your heart softens, creating a sadness you never knew was possible.”
Rylie reached for Spencer’s hands and he closed his fingers around her hands. “Can you imagine that though you’re married to someone else and love them with every ounce of your soul, you can still love the person you loved before? I will always have that with Maysen. It’s a different type of love, though. I’ll never love anyone the way I love you, Spence and I never have. You are who I am meant to be with.”