by Nia Arthurs
I wrench my fingers back. Guiltily. A flush steals across my cheeks. My chest. My toes.
He knows.
His eyes harden.
The bells sing again as he drops his hand away from the door. Gives me his back.
I stare, helplessly, as he walks away.
15 Ollie
My chest heaves. Sweat dries on my neck. I wipe my face with the side of my wrist and limp down the stretch of sidewalk running parallel to Brew Drop.
A car door slams shut.
“Ollie!” Teale yells. Runs after me. “What happened?”
I keep going.
“Ollie!” He jumps ahead.
Bars my way.
I shove him. Hard.
He goes flying.
Crashes into the wall.
I hear the pained groan that tumbles past his lips when his back makes contact with the bricks.
That was rude.
I’m furious right now, but I know I’m being stupid and emotional.
Teale convinced me to get back in the car and drove me to Brew Drop so I didn’t have to run the whole way.
I’d sprained my ankle in that desperate dash.
I’d injured myself for nothing.
But he’s still my brother. Going out of his way for me. I shouldn’t take my anger out on him.
“Ollie!” Someone else calls my name.
The bell above Brew Drop’s front door chirps happily.
Crashes back in place.
Footsteps thud on the concrete.
“Ollie! Wait!”
I don’t listen.
I keep going.
Just ignore her.
“Dude, what are you doing? Chandra’s calling for you.” Teale tries to stop me.
He’s hurt but he’s still looking out for me.
I push past him.
Unfortunately, my messed-up ankle keeps me from breaking out into a dead-run.
Chandra catches up to me easily.
She’s breathing hard. Dark cheeks are flushed. Brown eyes skitter to me. Meet my hard stare. Flutter back to the ground. “It’s not… don’t misunderstand.”
Misunderstand what?
Actions speak louder than words—isn’t that the phrase?
I saw her heart with my own eyes. Chandra was drooling over that diamond like a starving man over his first meal.
I can’t compete with that.
Damn. I don’t want to.
She lifts her beautiful face. Stares imploringly. “You’ve got to believe me.”
I take another step.
My ankle twists. Gives in. Taking my whole body with it.
“Whoa!” Teale grabs me by the shoulders. Keeps me up. “You’re hurt, man.”
“Let’s get him to a hospital,” Chandra says urgently.
“I’m fine.” I push him off.
“Don’t be stupid, Ollie.” Teale scowls. “You flung yourself out of a moving vehicle and then ran for a solid five minutes before I could get you back in the car.”
Chandra hears that and her lips go firm. She takes control. “Teale, we’re taking him to the hospital.”
I glare at her.
She pretends not to see.
Teale nudges me around. “Come on, buddy. You need to get that ankle checked before it gets worse.”
As my brother leads me back to the car, Chandra strolls alongside us. Her long black hair flaps against her back. Lush hips sway from side to side, drawing my eye.
Drawing my ire.
How dare she look that sexy while I’m angry with her?
Even now, I can feel heat spreading through my body.
Not anger.
Something else.
Rick steps out of the bakery as we pass. Stares at me. Then at Chandra.
He doesn’t say anything.
A good call on his part.
If he’d uttered one word, I would have broken away from Teale and Chandra and beaten the crap out of him. Bad ankle or no.
Chandra pretends she doesn’t see him. Climbs into the car. Folds her arms over her chest.
Teale shoves me into the passenger side and slams the door shut.
I listen to Chandra breathing in the backseat.
She taps her fingers on the leather beneath her perfect thighs.
Electricity whips through my veins when I remember exploring her curves with my fingers. The pad of my thumb rasping under her dress.
Was that only less than an hour ago?
Feels like a lifetime.
The driver’s door slams.
Teale gets into the car. Starts the engine.
For a minute, everything is silent.
Chandra breaks the quiet. “I didn’t say yes.”
“You didn’t say no either.”
She doesn’t bother to deny it. “You could have waited before jumping to your own conclusions.”
“I read the signs.”
“Then why come back for me?”
“My mistake. It won’t happen again.”
“Jerk.” She sinks lower into her seat.
I twist around. Glare at her. “You’re one to talk.”
“What the hell does that mean?”
“We kissed and then two seconds later, you’re running back to your ex?”
Her eyes sharpen. “You kissed me remember?”
“I didn’t hear any complaints.”
“I’m sharing them now. A heads-up would have been nice.”
“You expect an apology?”
She snorts. “Would you actually apologize?”
“Hell no. I don’t regret kissing you.” I turn and face forward. Watch the traffic go by. Stare at the place where I rolled outside. “Do what you want. It’s none of my business.”
“Bull.”
I say nothing. Just because she’s calling me out doesn’t mean I’m rising to the bait.
Teale shakes his head. “As if catching my brother and my girl kissing wasn’t enough, you’re fighting about it in front of me?”
“I’m not your girl, Teale.”
“She’s not your girl,” I say at the same time.
“I’m hurt, Chandra.” Teale glances at her in the rearview mirror. “I thought we had something special.”
“Who lied to you?”
“Least you could do was play along to spare my feelings. You already broke my heart kissing that lug.”
“Blame your brother. He’s the one who sprung his lips on me.”
“Don’t act like you didn’t like it.”
“Can you two fight about that part later? I’m still the victim over here.”
I roll my eyes.
Chandra huffs.
We get to the hospital.
With Teale’s help, I manage to climb out of the car. I don’t know if it’s the argument with Chandra or my anger at seeing Rick propose, but my ankle is throbbing like the Dickens.
I grit my teeth, struggling to walk inside on my own with minimum help from Teale.
Sweat pops on my forehead.
Chandra rushes ahead and gets a nurse. There’s a whirlwind of activity. Teale breaks away. A wheelchair appears in front of me. A second later, I’m thrust into the seat and getting pushed into a waiting room.
Chandra walks in soon after. She sees me and her steps slow. Brown hands rub together, like she’s not sure she should approach.
I glance away. An obvious rejection.
She lifts her chin. Stalks forward anyway. “Teale’s outside filling out the paperwork. A doctor will see you in a few minutes. How’s the pain?”
“I already told the nurse. I’m fine.”
“Liar.”
I grunt.
Guess dealing with a patient means nothing to Chandra. She’s the same as usual. Annoyed. Brusque. Sexy as hell.
Stop.
Thinking about her like that is wrong. Now that she’s got Rick breathing down her neck with diamonds and fancy promises to rule the world together, it’s just a matter of time until she goes back to him
. Or some other guy like him.
It’s better this way.
I can back off before my heart gets any more tangled in hers.
I shake my head. “You can go. Teale and I have it covered from here.”
“Shut up. I’m not going anywhere.”
My body stirs.
Damn.
Even when she snaps at me it turns me on.
I must be loopy from the pain.
It’s not a hard conclusion to jump to. The throb in my ankle is traveling up my leg, graduating to a steady, insistent pain.
“When is the doctor getting here?” Chandra mumbles. Checks her watch. Glances up.
Just then, a nurse calls my name.
Chandra raises her hand. Wheels me forward.
The doctor is an old, wizened man with glasses and thinning hair. He’s talkative, but I welcome the mindless chatter if only to distract me from the pain.
It’s really starting to amp up now.
Mid-way through my examination, the door busts open and Griffin storms through. Cobie’s right on his heels.
“Ollie, man! Are you okay? What happened?” Griff stares at my leg.
“Dude, what are you doing here?”
“Teale called and said you were in the hospital.” He wrings his hands like a concerned wife. “Will he be okay, Doc?”
Cobie and I exchange a look.
She winces. “He was really worried.”
The doctor frowns. “I understand that this is a stressful time, but can everyone clear the room? You can’t all be in here at once.”
“Oh, sorry.” Griff dips his head. Gestures to the old man. “Continue.”
In spite of myself, a smirk teases my lips.
Chandra catches my eye.
She’s smiling too.
The doctor chuckles when the others clear out. “You and your wife have interesting friends.”
My head whips up.
My… wife?
Instead of correcting him, Chandra shrugs daintily. “You’re right, Doc. We do.”
My chest pounds.
It’s just a joke. She didn’t mean it.
But like a burr caught in my socks, I can’t stop thinking of what it would mean to have my ring on Chandra’s finger. To have the white-picket fence, the dog, the two and a half kids with her.
They’re dreams I thought I’d thrown away.
Dreams I don’t deserve.
Chandra’s tempting me. Dangling happiness in front of me like a carrot.
It’s dangerous.
Because now… I’m starting to want things I can’t have.
16 Chandra
Ollie goes quiet as soon as the doctor makes that comment about me being his wife.
I wonder if he’s angry.
I know he’s angry with me. But I’m not sure if he’s offended at the thought of being romantically and legally associated in public.
I remember when people asked Rick if he’d marry me. They’d inquire as a joke, knowing that he was with me for reasons that didn’t lend itself to matrimonial fidelity.
And he would respond with the shame that they expected. Jittering movements. Stammering lips. Eyes sliding to the ground.
I would lift my head and answer, something witty and funny about marriages being overrated. I would laugh and pretend that I didn’t care.
But I did.
Not enough to feel hurt—I didn’t like him that much to want to marry him anyway—but enough to feel belittled.
It’s why Rick’s proposal at the bakery today caught me by surprise. It was unlike him. Went against the very grain and nature of what we’d shared.
Although I don’t call them ‘rules’, there were several defining qualities of our relationship—and all the others I’ve had in the past.
The first? I was to be cared for, in an exaggerated and lavish fashion.
The second—that he was to be catered to, in all the ways he asked for.
The third—our arrangement was not of love and could be terminated at our convenience.
Ollie is the first man I’ve been with that I actually like. More than his looks. More than his money… or lack thereof.
There’s something about him that’s managed to crawl past my defenses.
And so, the usual rules don’t apply.
They don’t even fit.
I wanted to go along with the doctor’s mistake—if only for a moment—because Ollie’s the only man I’d ever consider making that huge and scary commitment with.
But if the very thought of being married to me makes him so mad…
I should have corrected the doctor. Or at the very least, I should have kept my mouth shut. Now, there’s a pressing, thickening shame filling my chest.
A cruel taunt.
A bleeding epiphany.
I’m not good enough for Ollie.
“Do you think men actually care about you? They don’t. All you are is a warm hole for their pleasure. So get something out of it. You hear? Use their lust for your gain.”
I close my eyes.
Force Mom’s voice out of my head.
The doctor ends his examination. Looks at me through his thick window glasses. “The sprain is mild, so I don’t think we’ll need an X-ray.”
“Okay.” I bob my head.
“He’ll need to wear a brace. I’m thinking for at least a week.”
“A week?” Ollie scowls.
“Should I make it two?”
“A week is fine.”
“Make sure he stays off that leg,” the doctor says to me. “I’ll check.”
“Got it.”
The doctor recommends some painkillers, tells us to ice the ankle for the next 48 hours and then sends us on our way.
I grip Ollie’s prescription in one hand, reaching the other out to help him to the door. He stubbornly ignores me and hops on one foot, the sprained ankle bandaged in gauze and raised slightly.
Rolling my eyes, I open the door for him.
Walk out first.
Three sets of heads in the waiting room whip around when we step out.
Griffin, Cobie and Teale rush to their feet. Crowd us. They’re all talking at once.
Are you okay?
What did he say?
Will you ever walk again?
I smile slightly, wondering what it must feel like to be surrounded by a group of people who genuinely cared for me like this.
Apart from Cobie, no one’s ever taken the time to get to know me.
There have been attempts by past lovers, mostly pillow talk—a murmured conversation after sex that I quickly put a stop to.
But I’ve never been fooled.
No one cares.
Not unless they’re getting something out of it.
This… feels different.
Teale is Ollie’s brother. You’d think affection would be expected, but I know that families can be complicated and love is a choice whether you share the same blood or not.
Teale admires his brother.
He can’t help it. And nothing, not even the fact that Ollie ‘stole’ me away, could dampen his admiration for him.
Griffin’s the same.
So is Cobie.
They’d all fight a war with this man.
Speaks a lot to the kind of person Ollie is.
Reinforces the fact that I’m in way over my head.
I’m used to snakes surrounded by vipers. My previous boyfriends stepped on bodies and heads and hearts climbing the ladder of success. And though they’d never apologize, they also don’t sleep well at night.
I’d know.
I was the object chosen to rid them of their fear and frustration. To expand that nervous energy at night and in the morning, in the shower or in the office after a whispered instruction to lock the door.
I received expensive gifts and exciting getaways, not because of the sex—which honed my acting skills to perfection—but because I make them forget, for a second, that their lives aren’t as fabulous as
they make it look to others.
And I did a damn good job.
It was a job, though. A chore. Babysitting. Whiner babies.
Ollie’s no baby.
Suddenly, my hands start to shake.
Fear clamps my throat. Digs in tight. I back up, away from the happy party of concerned friends.
“I’ll go fill out this prescription,” I say beneath my breath.
Ollie’s blue eyes flash. “I’ll come.”
“No.” I’m not asking. “I’ll go by myself.”
“Then I’ll come,” Cobie says.
She’s not asking either.
I shrug.
Give in.
Together, we leave the guys and head down the hallway to catch the elevator. The pharmacy is downstairs. I tap my foot on the tile. Sigh loudly.
She glances at me, eyes peering past skin and bone to my soul.
I twist slightly away, trying to hide the broken pieces of me from the only person who’s held them without judgment.
“Babe,” Cobie calls.
The elevator arrives.
Dings.
I shuffle forward. “It’s here.”
Cobie follows. Settles in beside me. So close our arms press together. Her eyes are serious. Lips pursed in thought.
I stare at my pumps. They’re scuffed. I need to remember to clean them. Can’t have my babies looking rough.
“Why were you with Ollie?” Cobie asks.
“He showed up at closing.”
“For dessert?”
“For me.”
She sucks in a breath. “What about your date with Teale?”
“It got cancelled.”
“So you’re dating Ollie now?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
I glance away. “Rick showed up at the bakery.”
“What?”
I nod.
She folds her arms over her chest. Lips pinched. “What did he want?”
“To marry me.”
Cobie chuckles darkly. “Are you serious?”
I throw my hair over my shoulder. “Yup.”
“Did you kick him out?”
“I hesitated.”
She frowns.
The doors open.
Cobie snatches my wrist to keep me from walking out. “Why?”
“I…”
A group of nurses flock the elevator, cutting off our conversation. From the determined expression on Cobie’s face, I know that’s not the end of it.
As soon as we make another stop, she pulls me out and glances around. The hallways are filled with patients and loved ones. Doctors stride urgently past.