by Carol Ashby
Claudia clung to Philip. He felt so solid, like a tree trunk that could never be moved, even by the strongest winds. She desperately needed something solid to cling to, someone to make it bearable.
She felt the steady beating of his heart against her cheek as he held her. There was something calming about that. Finally, the flood of tears turned into a rivulet. The racking sobs quieted into small, silent jerks.
Philip looked down at her as she still clung to him so desperately, even though the tears had ended. “The dreams?”
She looked up at him with eyes like a rabbit dying slowly, painfully in a trap. “Every time I go to sleep, I see the lions, I hear the screams, I see the blood, and I wake up again. I just can’t stop the dreams.” More tears trickled down her cheeks.
She laid her cheek back against his chest, and he held her close, stroking her hair, for what seemed a very long time. It was so thick and soft that he wove his fingers in and slowly pulled them through. That brought a quiet sigh and a slight relaxation of her arms, but she still clung to him like a drowning sailor with only a single plank of wood between himself and a watery grave.
Claudia finally released him and stepped back. She hung her head, and her shoulders drooped, as if it took every bit of strength she possessed even to stand. He wiped the last of her tears away with his fingertips before placing his hands on her upper arms to steady her.
“If you can’t sleep at night, then I’ll help you sleep now.”
“Can you do that?” Both desperation and hope filled her eyes. “How?”
“Come with me.”
He placed her hand on his arm and covered it with his own. She rested her head against his shoulder as he led her back to the canopy.
Penelope and Junia had come from the cabin to stand beside them as he held her, and they followed.
“Penelope, would you please get me the scroll about India that’s sitting on my table?”
She hurried into the cabin to fetch it.
Philip led Claudia to the couch and had her sit down beside him.
He placed a pillow on his lap and patted it. “Lay your head down here.”
She complied, and her thick tresses fanned out across the pillow. The early morning sun turned them into shimmering strands of reddish silk.
Claudia bit her lip to stop the quiver. “I’m sorry to be such a terrible bother. I’m not even a paying passenger.”
Philip gazed into her grief-stricken eyes. How could he take the sadness from them? He pushed some strands of hair behind her ear. Her eyes still glistened with tears.
“You’re not a bother at all. It gives me pleasure to help you.”
Somehow, Claudia knew he wasn’t just saying that. He truly meant it. Some tension drained away as she floated in the peaceful, caring depth of his single eye. His warm smile replaced the snarling jaws of the lions at the top of her consciousness. It was funny how she didn’t usually notice the eyepatch and the swirling scars surrounding it now. In fact, he didn’t seem so terribly ugly anymore, especially when he was looking at her like he really cared. Looking at him made her feel better, even with his scars.
As his fingers swept her forehead, pushing back a lock of hair, she took a deep breath and slowly released it.
“Now close your eyes.” He began massaging her temple.
The soft touch of his fingertips as they made small circles released the last of the tension. It was as if she were melting in the warmth of his kindness.
Her eyes popped open as footsteps came around the corner. After Penelope handed Philip a scroll, she perched on the edge of a chair, watching with her hands clasped to her breast.
Claudia’s gaze flipped back to Philip’s gentle smile.
“You need to keep your eyes closed. Just relax and listen.”
She nodded her head and obeyed.
“I have long desired to write a full and orderly account of the land of India and of my journey to its farthest reaches...”
She let the soft cocoon of his deep, resonant voice wrap around her. It became fainter and fainter...
Philip stopped reading when her slow, steady breathing assured him she was deeply asleep. He sat for a long time with her head cradled in his lap, gazing at the beautiful face that looked more peaceful than it ever had since he first met her.
He knew exactly what could give her lasting peace, or rather Who, but there was no way he could tell her right now. She wanted nothing to do with Jesus, and she hated his father for telling her father about Him. She’d hate him, too, if she knew what he’d done.
As he gazed at her, he sighed and slowly shook his head. She was so smart, so beautiful, and so totally lost. He began what were now his daily prayers for her to accept the Lord and receive His peace.
When Claudia awoke several hours later, Philip was sitting in the chair next to her, reading one of his new histories. The scarred side of his face was toward her.
The swirls and ridges ran from where his right eyebrow should have been, down his cheek, barely missing his mouth, onto his neck, and under his tunic. He’d suffered horribly, but he always seemed content, even happy. How could he look so peaceful all the time? What was his secret?
Then he felt her gaze and turned so he could see her. “Did you sleep well?”
“Oh, yes. How did you know that would work?”
“It almost always worked for me. My mother used to rub my temple and tell me stories when I couldn’t get to sleep because the burns hurt too much. It helped me focus on something other than the pain. I could usually doze off after a while.”
“Was it so terribly painful?”
“At the time it was, but I scarcely remember the pain now. What I do remember is my mother’s voice and the touch of her fingers. Time does that―blunts the pain and leaves the good memories. You’ll see.”
Her brow furrowed as she watched him, not quite able to believe that but hoping he might be right.
She sat up and laid her hand on his arm. “It feels so good to have just slept without those dreams. How can I ever thank you?”
He placed his hand on top of hers and lightly squeezed. “No thanks are necessary. I enjoyed watching a beautiful woman sleep so peacefully today.” A smile lifted the corners of his mouth. “But I wouldn’t mind you reading to me for a while.”
“History or poetry?”
“History. Alexander the Great. Good training for future games of Conquest.” His teasing grin made his eye twinkle. “It should give you a better chance of beating me.”
She tilted her head as her grateful smile turned into her own teasing grin.
“But I can already beat you, at least occasionally.”
“And the more you can beat me, the more fun it becomes.”
She basked in his laughing eye and warm smile. Who would have thought there could be such a man, who could joke about being so ugly and enjoy losing if it meant a more exciting game? He was so unlike anyone she’d ever met. It was unbelievable good fortune that his father had been her father’s friend. His clever plan had rescued her from Lucius. His soothing voice had given her a peaceful sleep for the first time in days. He would get her safely to Titus. How could she ever repay him...for everything?
Chapter 26: Meanwhile, Back in Rome
Lucius rolled a stylus between his fingers. Then he leaned his elbows on his desk and rested his forehead on his fists.
Malleolus sat across from him with his arms crossed. “I have no more ideas about where she might have gone. I’ve visited every girl that Graecia remembered Claudia ever visiting. Every woman or girl she saw Claudia talking with at the baths since Sabinus made his request. I spoke not only with the girls, but with their fathers as well. I made a list of all the families Claudia might know who have estates that are reached by the Via Valeria, and I visited them. No one knew I was coming, so they had no chance to hide her before I arrived. There’s no trace of her anywhere.”
Lucius rubbed his chin
. “We’re missing something. She can’t have simply disappeared. We know some woman helped her. I’m certain the bath slave heard what she first told us. When I threatened to have the torturers take her in hand to make sure she spoke the truth...her terror was real, and the story didn’t change.”
He ran his fingers into his hair and rested his elbows on the desk again.
Then he snapped to attention. “A woman helped her, but there’s no reason to believe what the slave heard was true. That could have been a false clue to hide where she was going.” His jaw clenched. “And I know just the woman who’s smart enough to sneak her out of the bath and leave a trail of lies to mislead us in the hunt.”
Malleolus rubbed his cheek. “Who would that be?”
Lucius’s eyes narrowed. “Cornelia. She opposed the marriage from the moment she heard of it. She even had the gall to come in here and tell me I should break my word to Sabinus and end the betrothal. She didn’t care how dangerous that would be.”
His lips tightened. “She acts the chaste, dutiful wife, but I don’t believe it. Not after what she said that day. If Sabinus does something to me, our oldest son would become the new paterfamilias, and that would give her no end of satisfaction.”
Lucius rose. “It’s more than a week, so she won’t be expecting me to question her now. A trip to the eastern estate is in order. She’s either hidden Claudia there, or she’s asked one of her brothers to do it. They’re all too politically well-connected for me to bring charges and win against them, but they’ll return Claudia to avoid the scandal.” A sneer twisted his mouth. “No Cornelius Scipio would want a kidnapping charge to sully his reputation, even if he was never convicted.”
Malleolus uncrossed his arms. “I don’t think Cornelia would do that...but I suppose it’s worth checking. Do you want me to go now?”
Lucius eyed Malleolus. His steward was fond of Cornelia. Would he confront her to get a confession or help her cover up whatever she’d done?
“No. I’ll go myself.”
He’d go himself, and he’d go immediately before Malleolus could get a message to his estranged wife. His steward’s loyalty still belonged to Publius. Malleolus would continue dedicating his considerable skill to increasing the size of the Claudius Drusus fortune, but only for Publius’s grandsons. In a contest between Cornelia and himself, he was certain Malleolus would not choose his side.
When Lucius trotted into the stable yard at the eastern estate, a slave scurried over to take his horse.
“Where’s my wife?”
“In the garden, master.”
Lucius strode through the archway that separated the garden from the stable yard. Cornelia was seated on a chair under a grape arbor, reading.
She looked up as the gravel crunched under his feet. “Lucius. To what do I owe the honor of your visit?”
Her tone as she said “honor” and the tilt of her head as she remained seated stoked his anger.
“You know why I’ve come.” He planted himself before her with his fists on his hips.
She rose with a grace rivaling that of the Empress. “You are mistaken, Lucius. I haven’t the slightest idea what would make you deign to visit without warning me of your coming. I could have had more suitable refreshments prepared for you.” Palm up, she swept her hand toward the second chair under the arbor. Some bread, sliced cheese, and a bowl of fruit sat on the table beside it. “But since you are here, you may share what the chef prepared for my lunch.”
“No need for the gracious act. I know you helped Claudia escape, and now you have her hidden somewhere. You’re going to return her to me immediately, before Sabinus gets it into his head to strike at our family. It won’t be just me he’ll hurt. Our boys will suffer as well.”
Her laugh had always been musical, but today it grated on every nerve he possessed.
“I’m flattered that you think I helped her escape Sabinus’s clutches. I might have, if I’d thought of it first, and I could have devised a plan so clever you’d never find her before Sabinus got tired of waiting.” The smile that curved her lips was too self-satisfied by far, and it drew his frown. “But I’m not responsible, and I have no idea who might be. I wish I did. I’d extend my heart-felt gratitude to them for saving the sweetest girl from the worst fate.”
Lucius’s gaze swept over her and locked on her sky-blue eyes. She was a master of the aristocratic art of speaking without revealing her true thoughts, but this time he believed her.
“You’d better hope I find her soon. I’m not sure how long Sabinus is willing to wait. If he doesn’t lose interest in her and find some other girl to be his third wife, unpleasant consequences will happen. He’s made it too clear there’s a high price for disappointing him. I know you don’t care at all what happens to me, but he has a reputation for hurting the whole family.”
Cornelia didn’t even blink at his statement. “I know as much about Sabinus and how he strikes as you, husband. I wish you’d stood up to him and spared Claudia, but since you didn’t, I rejoice that someone did.”
She took a step away from him, then turned to look over her shoulder. “It’s getting late. You’re probably entertaining yourself with some female at the town house this evening.” Her nose twitched at the word female. “Don’t let me detain you.” After a fake gracious smile, she strolled toward the portico.
Lucius clenched his teeth. Cornelia had a rare gift when it came to irritating him, but she’d told him the truth. She wasn’t the one who’d helped Claudia escape. But if she didn’t do it, then who did?
Chapter 27: Sunsets and Stars
Dinner under the canopy had been relaxed and enjoyable, and Philip and the three women were watching the vibrant colors in the clouds as the sun set. After her undisturbed sleep on the couch, Claudia was in good spirits. Several hours of deep sleep free from disturbing dreams had refreshed her both physically and mentally.
Philip smiled to himself as he watched her chatting with Penelope and Junia instead of mostly just listening to their conversation. It was a great improvement. All it had taken to restore her spirits was letting her cry out some grief as he held her and helping her get some rest. Perhaps now she could begin to spend most of her time anticipating life in Perinthus with Titus rather than grieving over life in Rome without her father.
Penelope was enjoying the conversation, but she was also watching Philip. He spent most of his time looking at Claudia. She couldn’t quite decide if it was only because he was watching to see how she was doing or because he found her unusually interesting. He certainly seemed to enjoy himself when they played Conquest or read poetry together.
In fact, she’d never seen him enjoy the company of a woman so much. It might be because Claudia was very smart, and he found her intellectually stimulating. He was so intelligent himself that he took special pleasure in being with people who could challenge his mind, but maybe there was something more to it. Claudia seemed to enjoy his company as well. More than once, Penelope had heard Mother and Ariadne discussing what might get Philip to take a chance on liking another woman after being so cruelly rejected by Phoebe. Maybe a really smart woman was the answer.
She cast another glance at her brother. He was watching Claudia again. He really had spent an extraordinarily long time sitting with Claudia’s head in his lap after she fell asleep, and that caring look was on his face the whole time. Her brother was the kindest person she knew, so maybe it was just because Claudia needed his help so badly. But maybe it was a sign of something more. She certainly hoped so, and she planned to do her part in encouraging them. No man alive was more capable of loving deeply or more deserving of being loved in return.
The last of the orange was almost gone when Junia rose.
“Are my mistresses ready?”
Claudia had been reluctant to retire for most of the trip, but now she knew she could sleep without the nightmares. She was looking forward to a peaceful night of rest.
“I’m ready
.”
She turned to Philip and rested her hand on his arm. “Thank you for everything you did today, Philip.”
“It truly was my pleasure.”
It was worth it for that smile alone. Add the sparkling brown eyes and the setting sun backlighting her hair to make the red highlights glow, and Philip was more than repaid for every moment he’d spent with her that day.
He watched her walk toward the cabin door with Junia and Penelope. It would be good to spend an undisturbed night without her sobbing in the room next door.
The blood-curdling scream tore into Philip. He sat up so fast he whacked his head on the ceiling and knocked himself back onto his pillow. He’d heard people saw stars, and now he knew that was true. There would be a lump in a few minutes, but he was still the first through her door.
Claudia sat upright in her bed, wild-eyed and staring right at him, although it was clear she wasn’t seeing him. Hector came up behind him and looked over his shoulder.
“It’s nothing. Just more nightmares. Go tell the crew all is well if any of them heard, then you can go back to bed. I’ll take care of this.”
Hector nodded and left the cabin.
Penelope and Junia were standing in the doorway by then. Penelope’s eyes looked almost as scared as Claudia’s.
Philip went to the side of Claudia’s bed and shook her shoulder. Her head jerked, and her eyes focused on his face as she fully awoke to see him standing beside her.
“Are you all right now?” His voice was gentle as he tried to read her eyes in the moonlight.
She swung her legs to the floor, then stood up beside him.
“Oh, Philip!” The pain of the dream flooded her face as she tipped it up to lock her eyes on his.
She threw her arms around his chest and clung to him, just as she had that morning by the railing. “I slept so well under the canopy. I thought the nightmares were over, but this one was the worst ever.”