by Dena Blake
“Really? It’s so unlike you to drink in the middle of the day.”
“I need a little something to relax. It’s been a rough morning.”
“I’m all in on that.” Jordan waved the waitress down. “Can we have a bottle of the sauvignon blanc?” The waitress nodded and left the table. “What’s going on?”
“I just had to lay off twelve hundred people at work.”
“Was it unavoidable?”
“It was now. It wouldn’t have been if we’d made some better choices last year.” There had been a layoff then as well, one that had paved the path that led to her promotion. She should’ve looked at more options earlier.
“Don’t beat yourself up. It happens. It’s only business.”
That’s what she’d been telling herself to get through it, but it just didn’t feel that way anymore. “Not to them, it isn’t.”
The waitress came back with the wine, opened it, and poured Jordan a taste. She drank it, nodded, and the waitress filled their glasses. “Are you ready to order?”
“You go first.” Jordan motioned to Wynn. “Order up. It’s on me.”
“I’ll have the seafood stew and a small salad.”
“Ooh, that sounds good. I’ll have the same, and bring some sourdough bread and butter as well.” Jordan collected their menus and handed them to the waitress. “You need to keep your strength up to face the aftermath this afternoon.”
“I’m not going back to work. I’m going to Mom and Dad’s to see the kids. They’re watching them this weekend.”
“Right. Carly’s going over there later too.” She sipped her wine. “Be an awesome little sister and take her out to dinner tonight.”
The waitress came back with their salads and a loaf of bread, and Jordan immediately ripped a piece from it and buttered it.
“Why? What are you doing?”
“I need to catch a meeting. It’ll also give me a break from the whole ‘let’s have a baby’ conversation.” She took a bite of bread and then washed it down with a drink of wine.
“Carly wants to have a baby?” That wasn’t surprising. Carly was great with Suzanna’s kids and always seemed to enjoy being around them.
“Yep. Started harping on me about it six months into our marriage and never lets up. I’m not ready for kids, at least not my own. Don’t know if I ever will be. I’m not sure how I got myself into this mess of a marriage.”
Wynn knew exactly how she’d done it. Jordan loved a challenge, and Carly was definitely that. She was knowledgeably witty, the kind of woman who thinks outside the box and voices her thoughts in the best possible way at the best possible moment. Exactly the reason Wynn had been attracted to her as well, not that she wasn’t also gorgeous. Jet-black hair and sea-green eyes flashed through her mind, and her stomach jumped. Gorgeous indeed.
“That’s an interesting way to think about the love of your life.” She broke off a piece of bread, buttered it, and took a bite. She needed something in her stomach before the effects of the wine kicked in.
“Yeah, well, her beauty may have misdirected me when we met, and then the phenomenal sex blinded me.”
“And now?” She took a gulp of wine and pushed the thought of Carly and Jordan having phenomenal sex from her head. Not what she wanted to hear at all.
“We just don’t seem to have the same life goals.”
“It’s a little late to figure that out, don’t you think?” She’d suddenly lost her appetite.
“You’re not telling me anything I don’t already know, and she won’t even consider separating, let alone divorce.” The waitress brought their bowls of stew, and each of them moved their salads to the side—Jordan’s almost completely devoured and Wynn’s barely touched. “I should blame it all on you. I have to admit I didn’t really notice her until I saw her talking to you at one of my events. She was radiant that night. Still is.” Jordan ripped off another piece of bread from the loaf. “It’s been nice having someone of her caliber and looks by my side. Too bad we’re not moving in the same direction.”
Her mind scattered. How could Jordan not want Carly? “Are you kidding me? I totally backed off because you said she was the one.”
“Hmm, that’s interesting. I didn’t know that.” Jordan tilted her head. “I would’ve enjoyed a little friendly competition.”
“You’re such an ass.”
“True. But you’ve known that since we were kids.” Jordan dunked a piece of bread into her bowl. “Why don’t you romance her now?” She bit off the stew-soaked edge.
“Because she’s your wife and that’s what you should be doing.”
“Look, it’s not like Carly doesn’t know we have issues. I spend half my evenings at my old place.” Jordan spooned a bit of stew into her mouth and swallowed. “Maybe she’d be happier with you.”
“She probably would be, but she doesn’t have a choice now, does she?” She should’ve been stronger, told Jordan to back off then.
“Of course she has a choice. She just has to climb down from that moral high ground she’s propped herself up on and let me go.” Jordan drained her glass of wine and refilled it as well as Wynn’s. “I’ve given her the choice. Either we get divorced or we open our marriage to others.”
“She’ll never agree to that.” She couldn’t believe how callous Jordan was, putting Carly in that position, letting her think she wasn’t good enough to satisfy her.
“I know. I’m hoping she’ll go for the divorce.”
“You know something? I hope so too.” She picked up her spoon and immediately dropped it. “Are you sleeping with someone else?”
“No.” Jordan shook her head. “But I’ve had offers.” She smiled and took another bite of bread.
That wasn’t news. Jordan always had someone interested. She knew Jordan would eventually sleep with other women and break Carly’s heart if she didn’t agree to her terms. Wynn pushed her plate away, unable to stomach the stew now. The bread and wine would have to get her through. She was so angry at Jordan right now she could strangle her. If Jordan had only left Carly alone that night last year, Wynn might very well have been the one she’d married and be planning to have a family with. She cursed herself for her part in the whole situation. She should’ve told Carly how she felt.
They’d shared a spectacular kiss that night last year, one that Wynn had never been able to completely erase from her mind. Then Jordan had swooped in and dazzled Carly with her charm. Once that happened, she’d never had a chance with Carly. When Jordan had told her a few days later that she’d taken Carly home that night and that they’d slept together, Wynn didn’t know what to think. She guessed the kiss hadn’t been special for Carly at all. Jordan had gushed about how she thought Carly was her perfect match and could be the one. That’s when Wynn had done what any good sister would do. She’d stepped aside, let Jordan take the lead, and disappeared from Carly’s life. That was the right thing to do, wasn’t it? Wynn had thought so at the time, but after listening to Jordan just now, she knew she’d made the wrong decision.
* * *
Carly glanced out at the ocean as she drove across the San Francisco Bay Bridge to her in-laws’ house nestled in the foothills of Orinda. She hoped one day to live in one of the many suburbs of the San Francisco Bay area, but hadn’t been able to get Jordan to commit to moving out of the city. Housing was scarce and expensive in Orinda, as it was in most Northern California suburbs. When you came across a home that even remotely fit your wants and needs, you had to move with light speed to get a contract. Bidding wars skyrocketing into the millions had become common in recent years. Howard and Maryanne had bought in the area long ago, when the homes were affordable and sparse, had remodeled several times and added a pool since then. Their house had more than tripled in value.
She hit the button on her remote for the gate and waited for it to swing open before driving to the house and parking in front of the multi-car garage flanking the two-story traditional-styled home. She could hear l
aughing and splashing from the pool, and her heart warmed as she walked the path that weaved through the large oak trees, stopping only to smell the heirloom roses on her way.
Suzanna’s kids were already here. Not wanting to wait another moment to see them, she headed directly to the backyard. Maryanne was relaxing in the padded chaise lounge under the expansive offset patio umbrella. As soon as her mother-in-law saw her, she smiled widely and waved her over.
It was unreal how much her daughters resembled her. Maryanne’s hair was always perfectly colored to its natural auburn, and her light blue-gray eyes sparkled in the sunlight. Suzanna was feminine, like Maryanne, while Jordan and Wynn were more masculine in the way they dressed. Wynn, however, was the only one of the three who resembled Howard, their father, with a narrower face, darker eyebrows, and wonderfully thick lashes.
As she approached, Maryanne stood and pulled her into her arms. “Hi, honey. It’s good to see you.” She motioned to the pool. “The water is wonderful, and the kids have been waiting for you.” She leaned closer and softly said, “They got very excited when I told them you were coming over.”
The feeling was mutual. She hadn’t been able to wait to finish with her last couple so she could get here to see them. The couple’s decision to separate still weighed heavily on her. What bothered her even more was that they’d been afraid to tell her. Had she tried to convince them of anything? She hoped not. She was supposed to guide them to find their own feelings about each other and their marriage, not impose her own values on them.
“Aunt Carly, watch this.” Her nephew Josh shouted from the diving board before he flew into the water and made a huge splash. He was six years old and about to go into first grade, definitely a mama’s boy. Suzanna had told Carly she was worried about how he would adapt to a full day of school.
Carly watched Julianna swim from the deep end of the pool to the shallow end, where she and Maryanne were standing. Her strokes were getting faster. Julianna was the independent child, headed into second grade with confidence. She soaked up knowledge like a sponge with spilled milk. The conversations Carly had with her were so much more adult than her years warranted.
Julianna’s head emerged from the water, and she wiped her eyes. “Are you coming in?”
She held up her bag. “Brought my suit, so I guess that means yes.” Julianna smiled widely, and happiness spread through Carly. She loved these kids as though they were her own. “I guess I’d better change.” She turned and walked to the back door and into the closest bedroom. All the bedrooms had their own bathrooms now, and the master was upstairs, so it really didn’t matter which one she chose. This was the one she usually used. Oddly, with its moody gray walls accented by royal-blue bedding, it felt more comfortable to her than any of the others. Jordan’s room was decorated in a vibrant crimson that could set off an instant migraine in anyone spending more than ten minutes there. It was totally in tune with Jordan’s energized personality.
She hung her dinner clothes in the closet and set her phone on the dresser before she quickly changed into her red, one-piece suit and went back outside. She didn’t want to waste another minute away from the kids. The cool pool water felt refreshing as Carly crashed through the surface in the deep end and swam underwater to the shallow end. The weather this summer was hotter than usual, averaging in the mid-eighties for the past few weeks.
“Want to race, Auntie Carly?” She heard Julianna’s voice as soon as her head came above water.
“Give me a head start?”
“Then you’ll win.” Julianna’s mouth dropped open. Her miffed expression was priceless—one that Carly loved to elicit often. Julianna always didn’t catch the subtlety of her sarcasm.
“Exactly.” She grabbed hold of the edge and readied herself to race. “Up and back?”
Julianna nodded. “Once or twice?”
“Just once. Are you trying to kill your old auntie?”
Julianna giggled and held the edge of the pool before she gave the cue to race. “Ready, set, go.”
She waited a few seconds after Julianna took off and then swam after her. She passed her midway, but then Julianna took her at the turn. Carly never could manage a flip turn, even when she was younger. Trying to keep up with Julianna wasn’t easy. She’d been on the local swim team since she was able to float and had become a champion in her age group.
“I won.” Julianna stood in the shallow end holding up her arms and bragging like a champion.
“Fair and square. I didn’t even give it to you this time.” She picked Julianna up and tossed her toward the middle of the pool.
Julianna came up swiping the water from her eyes. “Better not’ve.”
She laughed and then swam a few more laps before stopping in the shallow end and joining in the ring-toss target game with Josh, a much easier challenge.
Howard, Carly’s father-in-law, stepped out onto the patio from the sliding kitchen door and dropped his towel onto a chair before racing toward the pool and launching into the deep end. Once the kids were completely occupied racing with Howard, Carly made her way to the steps and out of the pool. Maryanne had a towel waiting for her on the lounger under the umbrella next to her, as well as a cold bottle of water.
“So, where’s Jordan? I thought she was coming with you.” Marianne raised an eyebrow.
“At work, as usual. I’ve tried everything I can to keep her interest, but work always seems to come first.”
Maryanne nodded slowly, as though choosing her words carefully. “Can I be honest with you?”
“Of course. Always.”
“I can see that you’re unhappy.”
“What makes you say that?” She blotted her face with the towel. “I’m just a little tired.”
“I know my daughter better than you think.” Marianne pulled her eyebrows together. “Work is her main focus. Outside of that she has a very short interest span.”
Carly couldn’t help but smile at Maryanne’s observations because they were spot-on. “I can’t seem to find a way to keep her attention.”
“Are you sure you want to keep trying?”
“I don’t want to stop. I mean, I’m not sure I’m ready to just give up.” She found it interesting that Maryanne seemed to cut to the core of the issue when Carly hadn’t even known she was aware of it.
“I’ve always thought you were more suited for Wynn than Carly.” Marianne spoke as though it was a fact everyone was aware of. “Suzanna agrees.”
Heat rushed Carly at the thought. “What?”
Maryanne vaulted from her chair and shouted, “No running to the diving board. I’m not going to the hospital today.” She sank back to the lounger and focused on Carly again. “Divorce isn’t the end of the world, you know.” Maryanne watched Howard as he played with their grandchildren. “Did I ever tell you I was married briefly before I met Howard?”
She snapped her gaze back to Maryanne. “No. You didn’t.” And neither had Jordan.
Maryanne nodded. “We were right out of college and very much in love. We had no idea where our lives were going to take us, and as time went on they just happened to take us in opposite directions.”
“Wow. That must have been hard.”
“Not as hard as you might think. Eventually, we were making each other more miserable than happy, and we both realized the marriage wasn’t going to work. Blaming each other for giving up the things we wanted was useless, so we decided it would be best to move on. We’d rather be friends than become enemies.”
“I’ve never thought about it that way. I’ve always thought Jordan and I could work it out.”
“Well, it may be time for both of you to think it through again.” Maryanne motioned to the pool. “She’s never going to want a family as much as you do. At least not in the same timeframe, and neither of you is getting any younger.”
Carly chuckled at her mother-in-law’s blunt observation. She was right on all counts, as usual. She wanted kids, and she wanted them now. Thirty
-two wasn’t too old for having children by any means, but she wanted to be able to enjoy them while she had the energy. But divorce would mean admitting that counseling can’t fix some relationships. Admitting that her own marriage was unsalvageable would be a personal and professional blow. She’d been very vocal about relationships requiring compromise in the past, and her career might not be able to withstand the contradictions of her getting a divorce.
Chapter Four
The street was bare as Wynn drove to the end of the cul-de-sac. Mr. Pritchard was sitting on the porch in his chair, as usual, next to the one his wife used to occupy. She waved at Mr. P, but he didn’t acknowledge her. The unseasonably hot, rainy weather had become a glorious incubator for the weeds that had overtaken the flowerbed. Until this past year, their yard had always been pristine, the most beautiful on the block, and due to Mrs. Pritchard’s help, Wynn’s had been a close second. Once Mrs. P had retired from her elementary-school teaching position, she’d kept the flowers and the lawn meticulously groomed.
Not having any children of their own, Mrs. P had adopted her students and the people who lived in the neighborhood as family. Wynn missed Mrs. P’s friendly face. On most days when she came home, she and her husband would be out front to greet her with a pitcher of iced tea or at least throw her a wave as she drove up. Mrs. P seemed to make a special effort to be outside just as she came home. Their conversations always brightened her day.
She’d declined a few of their invitations for dinner over the years, but the many she’d accepted had been filled with great food and plenty of laughter. She’d also had a standing dinner date with Mrs. P on Mr. P’s bowling night, something she’d always looked forward to. After Mrs. P died, life was a struggle for everyone in the neighborhood, including Wynn. She’d invited Mr. P for dinner several times, and he’d accepted once or twice but eventually began declining each of her invitations and slowly slipped into the shell he kept himself isolated in now. Mr. P just wasn’t the same without Mrs. P. None of them were, really.