by K T Bowes
From the Author
The secondary school I attended in England was closed the year after I left. It was a dreadful place in which to try and undertake the business of learning and its reputation as the ‘worst school in the city’ was justified. I was physically attacked twice during my first year there, aged 11, always by girls older than me.
By the time I reached Year 13 with the end of my schooling imminent, I still believed I was the only child beaten up for being in the wrong place at the wrong time. I often wished I could be one of the other, more popular girls who seemed to move through school life without ever worrying about who was behind them in the corridors or whether they’d get to the toilet before the smokers arrived. In my final year, a chance conversation revealed the lie. The popular girls suffered too but we all kept it secret. I allowed myself to believe in the isolation that shame causes and so did they, all of us existing in our little bubbles; waiting for it all to be over so we could get on with our lives. What a wasted opportunity.
The school was closed when violence ruled and the adults washed their hands of it as every new incentive failed one after another. It was left empty for a few years before being resurrected as something very different, but the stain on the land remained and is still there, years later. Having observed schooling in New Zealand over the years, it is clear that the same problems still exist in pockets of misery even here, in paradise. The good news is that even the worst of times can be survived and a good education snatched, despite everything. There are those who are living proof of that.
You’ll never forget a bully’s face or the sound of their voice and how they made you feel. Those scars last a lifetime. But you know what? They won’t remember you. They’ll move on and forget what they did and why.
The most important piece of advice I can offer is this; tell someone. Get help. Don’t give a bully the power to spoil your outlook when you won’t even affect theirs long term. Make them remember your name; DON’T let them win.
Good luck out there!
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