‘But why didn’t you phone Father from Strasbourg? Why didn’t you tell him you wanted to marry him?’
Kyra glanced at Collie and shook her head. Her face became closed, emotionless, and she leaned back on the sofa, closing her eyes for a moment or two, breathing deeply. And then she rose and walked across the floor to the window, where she stood looking out at her garden, her eyes suddenly misty. She saw a blur of trees through her tears. They were leafless and stark and the grass was frost-bitten, the plants in the borders dried out. Her garden in winter always looked bereft. That was how she felt. Bereft, grieving and sad. She thought of Henri de Montfleurie and her throat closed; her emotions were too near the surface these days. She knew that Henri was suffering just as much as she was, because they did love each other, but there was nothing she could do. She could not help him. Or help herself.
A deep sigh trickled through her and she wiped the tears from her face with the tips of her fingers and then turned, came back to the fireplace where Collie and Rosie were sitting. ‘I didn’t phone him because I don’t want to marry Henri,’ she lied.
Collie was so taken aback she was speechless for a second. Then she found her voice and cried, ‘I find that very hard to believe, Kyra! Very hard. You love Father, you’ve admitted that much.’
‘Yes,’ Kyra said, ‘I do love him. But sometimes love alone is not enough to overcome great obstacles.’
‘Are you referring to the age difference?’ Rosie said.
‘No.’
‘Well then, is there some sort of… impediment… a reason why you can’t marry Henri de Montfleurie?’ Rosie asked, looking at Kyra intently.
‘If you mean legally, no there isn’t. I am divorced from Jacques.’
‘But there is an impediment,’ Rosie exclaimed, eyeing her closely. ‘At least, that’s what you’ve just implied.’
Kyra shook her head, as if denying something to herself, and then she pushed herself up onto her feet and walked over to the window once more. But she did not pause to look out as she had before; instead she walked back towards the fireplace, then returned to the window. She began to pace up and down in this manner, her face perfectly still, calm almost, but there was a look of great agitation in her grey eyes.
At last she stopped and stood staring at Collie and Rosie. She took a deep breath and said rapidly, in staccato bursts, ‘All right, I’ll tell you the truth. I do want to marry Henri. But I can’t. I’m afraid of Guy. There is something he knows about me. A secret. If I marry Henri he will tell him. In order to hurt him. I couldn’t bear that. So I must go away.’
Collie and Rosie were both on the edge of their seats, staring back at her.
Collie said urgently, ‘What kind of secret? What is it that Guy knows about you, Kyra?’
Kyra wanted to confide in them, but she could not. She had lost her nerve.
TWENTY-THREE
Two pairs of eyes, one set blue, the other green, were riveted on her in the most disconcerting way, and Kyra flinched under their fixed and intense scrutiny.
For a brief moment she stared back at Collie and Rosie, and then she swung around and walked over to the fireplace, where she stood looking down into its bright flames, her hand resting on the mantelpiece.
Her mind was floundering now; she could not understand why she had ever been foolish enough to mention her secret to them. It would have been far better not to have said a word; or to have thought up a bunch of lies; anything would have been better than admitting that there was an impediment, as Rosie called it.
‘Your secret can’t be all that bad,’ Rosie said.
Startled, Kyra almost jumped out of her skin, and then, brought out of her reverie by Rosie’s voice, she tried to gather her swimming senses, to pull herself together.
After a moment she turned, very slowly, and looked across at Rosie, who was seated on the sofa.
The two women exchanged a long look, and then Kyra said, in a low voice, ‘It is bad.’
‘Please tell us what it is that Guy knows about you, Kyra,’ Collie implored. ‘Nothing you could say will change the way we feel about you. Rosie and I like you, care about you, and I know that my father loves you.’
Kyra was silent, thinking hard, wondering what to do, and, more importantly, what to say to them. Lies. That was the answer. She must tell them a lot of lies; she certainly couldn’t tell them the truth.
Rosie leaned forward, her elbows on her knees. ‘The family is aware that Guy is a troublemaker. Nobody pays too much attention to him, or to what he says, you know.’
‘I think Henri would pay attention to this particular thing,’ Kyra responded swiftly.
‘In any case, how does Guy know about this secret of yours?’ Collie shook her head. ‘I mean, how did he find out?’
‘He is part of it,’ Kyra said, and could have instantly bitten off her tongue. She had already said far too much, and she shrank back against the stone fireplace, endeavouring to still her limbs, which had begun to shake.
Rosie was fully aware that Kyra was dreadfully upset, and she said in the gentlest voice, ‘If it were me, I would forestall Guy by telling Henri myself. Why don’t you do that?’
‘I couldn’t possibly!’ Kyra cried, her grey eyes flaring.
‘Then why don’t you take a chance with us? Collie and I are not here to judge you, only to listen, to help if we can. And you can trust us. Why not tell us your secret, Kyra, test it on us, and then we’ll all decide together what action you should take. Three minds are better than one.’
‘Oh yes, that’s a terrific idea,’ Collie agreed, and added, ‘Guy is not in Father’s good graces, and he hasn’t been for a long time, but surely you know that yourself. My father doesn’t listen to his opinions any more. He lost respect for him years ago.’
Kyra stood by the fireplace, saying nothing, weighing their words.
‘Well, we know you didn’t murder somebody, so how bad can it be?’ Rosie exclaimed. ‘Come on, Kyra, confide in us, and perhaps we can help. Maybe we can find a solution to your problem.’
Kyra looked from Rosie to Collie, and then before she could stop herself she said, ‘It might be upsetting to you, Rosie. You see—’ and then she stopped abruptly.
Rosie gave her a hard stare. ‘What do you mean?’
I’m undone, Kyra thought. I shouldn’t have started this. But I’ve got to go on, there’s no turning back. And perhaps it’s for the best. Maybe it should be out in the open.
She said slowly, carefully, ‘When I came to live in the Loire in 1986, one of the first people I met was your aunt, Sophie Roland, Collie. Anyway, she took me under her wing a bit, and that September, about four months after I’d met her, she introduced me to Guy. We were at the same dinner party in Monte Carlo.’
Kyra felt her mouth go dry with apprehension and she swallowed, cleared her throat, looked directly at Rosie. ‘He told me that evening that you and he were estranged. Actually, he said you were separated, that you had left him, and had moved back to the States—’
‘I was working on a movie in Canada,’ Rosie interrupted.
‘I found that out later.’ Kyra seemed suddenly acutely embarrassed, and she said rapidly, ‘I honestly mean this… I do hope what I’m going to tell you won’t upset you, Rosie.’
‘It won’t, Kyra, really it won’t, and in September of 1986 Guy and I were estranged. That part of his story was true.’
Kyra nodded. ‘To continue, Guy asked me for my number in the Loire that night, and I gave it to him. A week later, when we were both back from the south of France, he phoned me. We began to see each other. It started out harmlessly enough, at least on my part. I was separated from Jacques, preparing to divorce, and I was lonely. I was glad to make new friends like Sophie and Guy. Also, Guy had made it clear to me that he was on his own, as he put it. I believed him, of course. Why wouldn’t I? But inevitably we became entangled with each other over the next few months.’
‘He never brought you to Montfleurie,’ Co
llie murmured. ‘But of course he wouldn’t have dared.’
Kyra nodded. ‘I understand that now, knowing how much everyone loves Rosie. But at the time I thought it was odd, inasmuch as he had said he was a man on his own, whose wife had left him. When I mentioned this, he explained that his father was rather old-fashioned, and that he couldn’t possibly take me to the château until he had sorted out his marital mess.’
Rosie and Collie exchanged knowing looks but made no comment.
Kyra glanced at them, then averted her eyes, gazed down the length of the room. After a moment or two, she swallowed and said, ‘We became involved and it got a bit complicated—’
‘You slept with him,’ Rosie said in an even voice. ‘That’s what you’re trying so hard to say, isn’t it, Kyra? You had an affair with Guy.’
Kyra bit her lip. ‘Yes. But it was short-lived, and we only slept with each other a couple of times.’
A small puzzled frown knitted Rosie’s brows. ‘Is that the big secret?’
‘Yes.’
Collie began to chuckle. ‘I don’t think that’s such a terrible thing,’ she said. ‘I’m sure my father won’t be perturbed by it.’
‘Yes, he will,’ Kyra insisted.
‘Well, I’m not and I was married to Guy. Am married to him, if only in name,’ Rosie pointed out, smiling at Kyra encouragingly, wanting to make her feel better. ‘And how long did the affair last?’ she asked, although she was not particularly interested in the answer.
‘Not long, about three months altogether. Guy soon lost interest in me, once we’d… made love. He went off to India, as you both know.’
‘And he only came back once for a week, was gone for two years,’ Collie remarked. ‘And in that time you met my father.’
‘Yes. Our relationship started out as a very nice friendship, if you remember, Collie. We shared a lot of common interests, got on so well together, and the friendship grew, and changed, became terribly important to us both, and suddenly we realized we had fallen in love with each other. I knew then that I should have told him about Guy right from the start, but I hadn’t, and frankly, I didn’t have the courage to say anything once we’d become so involved. I suppose I was afraid of losing him.’
‘You can tell him now. Today. And I absolutely guarantee that you won’t lose him, Kyra,’ Collie assured her. ‘I know my father, and he is intelligent, compassionate and understanding. He’s a sophisticated man, who’s seen a lot, done a lot, and he has great wisdom and humanity. Truly, he will understand. And after all, you didn’t know Father when you met Guy.’
‘I don’t know what to do… I’m afraid…’ Kyra stared at Collie and shook her head, looking helpless.
Rosie murmured thoughtfully, ‘You’re assuming Guy will tell his father about this old relationship once you marry Henri, but he might not.’
‘Oh come on, Rosie, I bet you he will!’ Collie cried heatedly. ‘I know my brother. He loves to stir. So don’t give him the benefit of the doubt. Please.’
‘Collie is right, Rosie,’ Kyra told her. ‘You see, although Guy dropped me, when he came back from India and found out about Henri he started to pursue me again. That’s the way he is, and you must know that, since you were married to him. Guy always wants what he can’t have, and the grass is always greener at the other side of the street. Perhaps that’s why he’s such a terrible womanizer. He’s easily and quickly bored, has to constantly move on.’
Rosie nodded her agreement. ‘Oh I’ve come to realize that now. And I think that’s what happened when we were first married. Within a year he was tired of me, wanted to sleep with other women. I needed to continue my career, because I loved it, but also because we needed the money. Anyway, my being away so much gave him ample opportunity to play around.’
‘I’m afraid so.’ Kyra shook her head. ‘Guy is strange, unfathomable in so many ways. But I do know this, he loves the chase more than the conquest, and therefore he’ll never be happy with one woman.’
‘All right,’ Collie said firmly. ‘Let’s move on. We’re all agreed that Guy will tell Father, just to be spiteful—after all that’s his nature. So, Kyra, you must beat him to it.’
‘What do you mean?’
‘You have to go to Father and tell him yourself. What do you have to lose? You’ve already given my father up because of your secret.’
‘That’s true.’
‘Then let’s go!’ Collie stood up.
‘Come on, Kyra, get your coat!’ Rosie exclaimed.
‘Now? You want me to tell him now?’
‘Oh yes, let’s get it over with. Rosie and I will be there to give you moral support,’ Collie said.
‘I don’t want to run into Guy,’ Kyra muttered.
‘He’s not at Montfleurie. There was a bit of an altercation last week and he went to Paris,’ Collie explained.
Rosie also stood up. ‘We’ll drive you over to Montfleurie with us, and drive you back. So let’s do this before you have a change of heart, or lose your nerve.’
They hurried her out of the sitting room, and, although she was protesting, her protestations were weak.
***
The three women ran into Henri de Montfleurie in the grand entrance hall of the château. He was startled to see Kyra with them, believing her to be in Strasbourg, but the look of surprise on his face was immediately brightened by the pleasure flooding into his eyes.
‘Kyra, my dear,’ he said warmly, and came to greet her, taking hold of her hands, kissing her on both cheeks.
‘Hello, Henri,’ she said.
‘Kyra wants to tell you something, Father,’ Collie announced, taking command, determined to see this through. ‘She wants to explain why she really went to Strasbourg. We’ll leave you alone, and perhaps we can all have a drink later.’ She focused on Kyra. ‘And perhaps you’d like to stay for supper, Kyra.’
Not waiting for Kyra’s response, Rosie grabbed Collie by the arm. ‘I need to discuss the holiday menus with you. Come on.’
‘Yes, let’s do that now,’ Collie said, and the two of them fled.
***
Henri led Kyra across the hall and into his study at the back of the château. Drawing her towards the fireplace, he indicated a chair, and said, ‘Why don’t you sit here. You look chilled to the bone, my dear, and very tired.’
Without a word she sank into the chair gratefully. He was always so kind, the kindest man she had ever known. Her eyes never left his face as he took the chair opposite her, leaned back and crossed his legs.
‘Now, my dear, what’s this all about? Collie and Rosie looked like a couple of genuine conspirators, and they certainly exuded an air of great excitement.’
Kyra recognized that for her there was only one way to handle the situation, and this was to tell him quickly, get it over with before she lost her nerve. And so she did exactly this, explained everything in the same way she had to Collie and Rosie, leaving nothing out, sparing no detail, even though some of the things she had to say were hard for her to articulate.
Finally coming to a close, she took a deep breath and finished, ‘And so you see I ran away to Strasbourg, using Anastasia’s illness as an excuse, because I knew that if I married you, Guy would tell you about our affair, just to hurt you. And I couldn’t have borne that, Henri. Nor could I stand the idea that you’d think ill of me.’
‘But I already knew. I’ve always known, Kyra darling,’ Henri said gently, smiling at her. ‘Guy told me four years ago, when he came back, very briefly, from India, and discovered we had a warm and loving relationship. Just before he went back there for another year he told me everything, in great detail. He couldn’t resist telling me.’
Kyra was dumbfounded. ‘But… but… you never said anything to me,’ she stammered.
‘What was the point?’ Henri asked, leaning forward, reaching out, taking her hand in his. ‘He told me you and he had had an affair, and I discovered I didn’t care, that it didn’t really matter to me. All that mattered
was you. Us. A man knows when a woman truly loves him, Kyra, and I knew without a shadow of a doubt that you loved me. That was all I wanted, and all I needed.’
‘I don’t understand Guy… he’s so… mean…’ Her voice faltered.
‘He can’t bear other people to be happy,’ Henri said. ‘He’s become a spoiler. I don’t know why I say become. He’s always been like that—jealous, envious, angry, bitter, although he has no reason to be any of those things. I’ve been thinking about him a lot this past week, and looking back I realize that he was always a poor specimen.’ Henri sighed and shook his head sadly. ‘The breeding’s there but there’s no character, no stamina. He’s always been jealous of Collie, and he was jealous of my relationship with his mother. That’s why there has always been this great rivalry in him, rivalry with me, I mean.’
‘I believe you’re right, Henri.’ She paused, then said quietly, ‘I’m sorry I caused you hurt. Please forgive me.’
‘There’s nothing to forgive. And I never thought badly of you.’
Kyra stared at Henri for the longest moment. ‘Whatever you say, I know that I should have told you about Guy when we first met, first became friends. It was wrong of me, it placed you in a false position. And not to tell you I’d had a relationship with your son was lying… by omission.’
Henri de Montfleurie made no comment, sat gazing at Kyra Arnaud, studying her face. He saw her love for him reflected in her eyes, and he thought of the anguish he had suffered these past few weeks because she had left him, and he knew she had suffered too. Now the time had come to stop the pain. He loved this woman; he wanted her with him for the rest of his life. And so he rose and went to her.
Bending over her chair, he kissed the face looking up at him so yearningly.
‘Will you marry me, Kyra? Will you become my wife?’
‘Oh yes, Henri, yes.’
A smile struck his face, and he kissed her again before pulling her to her feet. ‘Let us go and find those two wonderfully meddlesome young women, and tell them the good news.’
***
Rosie and Collie were in the small family sitting room, and when Henri and Kyra walked in they looked up expectantly. And they instantly knew from their smiles that everything was all right between them.
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