Delphi Complete Works of William Wordsworth

Home > Other > Delphi Complete Works of William Wordsworth > Page 186
Delphi Complete Works of William Wordsworth Page 186

by William Wordsworth


  INTRODUCTION—CHILDHOOD AND SCHOOL-TIME

  OH there is blessing in this gentle breeze,

  A visitant that while it fans my cheek

  Doth seem half-conscious of the joy it brings

  From the green fields, and from yon azure sky.

  Whate’er its mission, the soft breeze can come

  To none more grateful than to me; escaped

  From the vast city, where I long had pined

  A discontented sojourner: now free,

  Free as a bird to settle where I will.

  What dwelling shall receive me? in what vale 10

  Shall be my harbour? underneath what grove

  Shall I take up my home? and what clear stream

  Shall with its murmur lull me into rest?

  The earth is all before me. With a heart

  Joyous, nor scared at its own liberty,

  I look about; and should the chosen guide

  Be nothing better than a wandering cloud,

  I cannot miss my way. I breathe again!

  Trances of thought and mountings of the mind

  Come fast upon me: it is shaken off, 20

  That burthen of my own unnatural self,

  The heavy weight of many a weary day

  Not mine, and such as were not made for me.

  Long months of peace (if such bold word accord

  With any promises of human life),

  Long months of ease and undisturbed delight

  Are mine in prospect; whither shall I turn,

  By road or pathway, or through trackless field,

  Up hill or down, or shall some floating thing

  Upon the river point me out my course? 30

  Dear Liberty! Yet what would it avail

  But for a gift that consecrates the joy?

  For I, methought, while the sweet breath of heaven

  Was blowing on my body, felt within

  A correspondent breeze, that gently moved

  With quickening virtue, but is now become

  A tempest, a redundant energy,

  Vexing its own creation. Thanks to both,

  And their congenial powers, that, while they join

  In breaking up a long-continued frost, 40

  Bring with them vernal promises, the hope

  Of active days urged on by flying hours,—

  Days of sweet leisure, taxed with patient thought

  Abstruse, nor wanting punctual service high,

  Matins and vespers of harmonious verse!

  Thus far, O Friend! did I, not used to make

  A present joy the matter of a song,

  Pour forth that day my soul in measured strains

  That would not be forgotten, and are here

  Recorded: to the open fields I told 50

  A prophecy: poetic numbers came

  Spontaneously to clothe in priestly robe

  A renovated spirit singled out,

  Such hope was mine, for holy services.

  My own voice cheered me, and, far more, the mind’s

  Internal echo of the imperfect sound;

  To both I listened, drawing from them both

  A cheerful confidence in things to come.

  Content and not unwilling now to give

  A respite to this passion, I paced on 60

  With brisk and eager steps; and came, at length,

  To a green shady place, where down I sate

  Beneath a tree, slackening my thoughts by choice

  And settling into gentler happiness.

  ‘Twas autumn, and a clear and placid day,

  With warmth, as much as needed, from a sun

  Two hours declined towards the west; a day

  With silver clouds, and sunshine on the grass,

  And in the sheltered and the sheltering grove

  A perfect stillness. Many were the thoughts 70

  Encouraged and dismissed, till choice was made

  Of a known Vale, whither my feet should turn,

  Nor rest till they had reached the very door

  Of the one cottage which methought I saw.

  No picture of mere memory ever looked

  So fair; and while upon the fancied scene

  I gazed with growing love, a higher power

  Than Fancy gave assurance of some work

  Of glory there forthwith to be begun,

  Perhaps too there performed. Thus long I mused, 80

  Nor e’er lost sight of what I mused upon,

  Save when, amid the stately grove of oaks,

  Now here, now there, an acorn, from its cup

  Dislodged, through sere leaves rustled, or at once

  To the bare earth dropped with a startling sound.

  From that soft couch I rose not, till the sun

  Had almost touched the horizon; casting then

  A backward glance upon the curling cloud

  Of city smoke, by distance ruralised;

  Keen as a Truant or a Fugitive, 90

  But as a Pilgrim resolute, I took,

  Even with the chance equipment of that hour,

  The road that pointed toward the chosen Vale.

  It was a splendid evening, and my soul

  Once more made trial of her strength, nor lacked

  Aeolian visitations; but the harp

  Was soon defrauded, and the banded host

  Of harmony dispersed in straggling sounds,

  And lastly utter silence! “Be it so;

  Why think of anything but present good?” 100

  So, like a home-bound labourer, I pursued

  My way beneath the mellowing sun, that shed

  Mild influence; nor left in me one wish

  Again to bend the Sabbath of that time

  To a servile yoke. What need of many words?

  A pleasant loitering journey, through three days

  Continued, brought me to my hermitage.

  I spare to tell of what ensued, the life

  In common things—the endless store of things,

  Rare, or at least so seeming, every day 110

  Found all about me in one neighbourhood—

  The self-congratulation, and, from morn

  To night, unbroken cheerfulness serene.

  But speedily an earnest longing rose

  To brace myself to some determined aim,

  Reading or thinking; either to lay up

  New stores, or rescue from decay the old

  By timely interference: and therewith

  Came hopes still higher, that with outward life

  I might endue some airy phantasies 120

  That had been floating loose about for years,

  And to such beings temperately deal forth

  The many feelings that oppressed my heart.

  That hope hath been discouraged; welcome light

  Dawns from the east, but dawns to disappear

  And mock me with a sky that ripens not

  Into a steady morning: if my mind,

  Remembering the bold promise of the past,

  Would gladly grapple with some noble theme,

  Vain is her wish; where’er she turns she finds 130

  Impediments from day to day renewed.

  And now it would content me to yield up

  Those lofty hopes awhile, for present gifts

  Of humbler industry. But, oh, dear Friend!

  The Poet, gentle creature as he is,

  Hath, like the Lover, his unruly times;

  His fits when he is neither sick nor well,

  Though no distress be near him but his own

  Unmanageable thoughts: his mind, best pleased

  While she as duteous as the mother dove 140

  Sits brooding, lives not always to that end,

  But like the innocent bird, hath goadings on

  That drive her as in trouble through the groves;

  With me is now such passion, to be blamed

  No otherwise than as it lasts too long.

  When, as
becomes a man who would prepare

  For such an arduous work, I through myself

  Make rigorous inquisition, the report

  Is often cheering; for I neither seem

  To lack that first great gift, the vital soul, 150

  Nor general Truths, which are themselves a sort

  Of Elements and Agents, Under-powers,

  Subordinate helpers of the living mind:

  Nor am I naked of external things,

  Forms, images, nor numerous other aids

  Of less regard, though won perhaps with toil

  And needful to build up a Poet’s praise.

  Time, place, and manners do I seek, and these

  Are found in plenteous store, but nowhere such

  As may be singled out with steady choice; 160

  No little band of yet remembered names

  Whom I, in perfect confidence, might hope

  To summon back from lonesome banishment,

  And make them dwellers in the hearts of men

  Now living, or to live in future years.

  Sometimes the ambitious Power of choice, mistaking

  Proud spring-tide swellings for a regular sea,

  Will settle on some British theme, some old

  Romantic tale by Milton left unsung;

  More often turning to some gentle place 170

  Within the groves of Chivalry, I pipe

  To shepherd swains, or seated harp in hand,

  Amid reposing knights by a river side

  Or fountain, listen to the grave reports

  Of dire enchantments faced and overcome

  By the strong mind, and tales of warlike feats,

  Where spear encountered spear, and sword with sword

  Fought, as if conscious of the blazonry

  That the shield bore, so glorious was the strife;

  Whence inspiration for a song that winds 180

  Through ever-changing scenes of votive quest

  Wrongs to redress, harmonious tribute paid

  To patient courage and unblemished truth,

  To firm devotion, zeal unquenchable,

  And Christian meekness hallowing faithful loves.

  Sometimes, more sternly moved, I would relate

  How vanquished Mithridates northward passed,

  And, hidden in the cloud of years, became

  Odin, the Father of a race by whom

  Perished the Roman Empire: how the friends 190

  And followers of Sertorius, out of Spain

  Flying, found shelter in the Fortunate Isles,

  And left their usages, their arts and laws,

  To disappear by a slow gradual death,

  To dwindle and to perish one by one,

  Starved in those narrow bounds: but not the soul

  Of Liberty, which fifteen hundred years

  Survived, and, when the European came

  With skill and power that might not be withstood,

  Did, like a pestilence, maintain its hold 200

  And wasted down by glorious death that race

  Of natural heroes: or I would record

  How, in tyrannic times, some high-souled man,

  Unnamed among the chronicles of kings,

  Suffered in silence for Truth’s sake: or tell,

  How that one Frenchman, through continued force

  Of meditation on the inhuman deeds

  Of those who conquered first the Indian Isles,

  Went single in his ministry across

  The Ocean; not to comfort the oppressed, 210

  But, like a thirsty wind, to roam about

  Withering the Oppressor: how Gustavus sought

  Help at his need in Dalecarlia’s mines:

  How Wallace fought for Scotland; left the name

  Of Wallace to be found, like a wild flower,

  All over his dear Country; left the deeds

  Of Wallace, like a family of Ghosts,

  To people the steep rocks and river banks,

  Her natural sanctuaries, with a local soul

  Of independence and stern liberty. 220

  Sometimes it suits me better to invent

  A tale from my own heart, more near akin

  To my own passions and habitual thoughts;

  Some variegated story, in the main

  Lofty, but the unsubstantial structure melts

  Before the very sun that brightens it,

  Mist into air dissolving! Then a wish,

  My last and favourite aspiration, mounts

  With yearning toward some philosophic song

  Of Truth that cherishes our daily life; 230

  With meditations passionate from deep

  Recesses in man’s heart, immortal verse

  Thoughtfully fitted to the Orphean lyre;

  But from this awful burthen I full soon

  Take refuge and beguile myself with trust

  That mellower years will bring a riper mind

  And clearer insight. Thus my days are past

  In contradiction; with no skill to part

  Vague longing, haply bred by want of power,

  From paramount impulse not to be withstood, 240

  A timorous capacity, from prudence,

  From circumspection, infinite delay.

  Humility and modest awe, themselves

  Betray me, serving often for a cloak

  To a more subtle selfishness; that now

  Locks every function up in blank reserve,

  Now dupes me, trusting to an anxious eye

  That with intrusive restlessness beats off

  Simplicity and self-presented truth.

  Ah! better far than this, to stray about 250

  Voluptuously through fields and rural walks,

  And ask no record of the hours, resigned

  To vacant musing, unreproved neglect

  Of all things, and deliberate holiday.

  Far better never to have heard the name

  Of zeal and just ambition, than to live

  Baffled and plagued by a mind that every hour

  Turns recreant to her task; takes heart again,

  Then feels immediately some hollow thought

  Hang like an interdict upon her hopes. 260

  This is my lot; for either still I find

  Some imperfection in the chosen theme,

  Or see of absolute accomplishment

  Much wanting, so much wanting, in myself,

  That I recoil and droop, and seek repose

  In listlessness from vain perplexity,

  Unprofitably travelling toward the grave,

  Like a false steward who hath much received

  And renders nothing back.

  Was it for this

  That one, the fairest of all rivers, loved 270

  To blend his murmurs with my nurse’s song,

  And, from his alder shades and rocky falls,

  And from his fords and shallows, sent a voice

  That flowed along my dreams? For this, didst thou,

  O Derwent! winding among grassy holms

  Where I was looking on, a babe in arms,

  Make ceaseless music that composed my thoughts

  To more than infant softness, giving me

  Amid the fretful dwellings of mankind

  A foretaste, a dim earnest, of the calm 280

  That Nature breathes among the hills and groves.

  When he had left the mountains and received

  On his smooth breast the shadow of those towers

  That yet survive, a shattered monument

  Of feudal sway, the bright blue river passed

  Along the margin of our terrace walk;

  A tempting playmate whom we dearly loved.

  Oh, many a time have I, a five years’ child,

  In a small mill-race severed from his stream,

  Made one long bathing of a summer’s day; 290

  Basked in the sun, and plunged and basked again

  Alternate, all a summer’s
day, or scoured

  The sandy fields, leaping through flowery groves

  Of yellow ragwort; or, when rock and hill,

  The woods, and distant Skiddaw’s lofty height,

  Were bronzed with deepest radiance, stood alone

  Beneath the sky, as if I had been born

  On Indian plains, and from my mother’s hut

  Had run abroad in wantonness, to sport

  A naked savage, in the thunder shower. 300

  Fair seed-time had my soul, and I grew up

  Fostered alike by beauty and by fear:

  Much favoured in my birth-place, and no less

  In that beloved Vale to which erelong

  We were transplanted;—there were we let loose

  For sports of wider range. Ere I had told

  Ten birth-days, when among the mountain slopes

  Frost, and the breath of frosty wind, had snapped

  The last autumnal crocus, ‘twas my joy

  With store of springes o’er my shoulder hung 310

  To range the open heights where woodcocks run

  Along the smooth green turf. Through half the night,

  Scudding away from snare to snare, I plied

  That anxious visitation;—moon and stars

  Were shining o’er my head. I was alone,

  And seemed to be a trouble to the peace

  That dwelt among them. Sometimes it befell

  In these night wanderings, that a strong desire

  O’erpowered my better reason, and the bird

  Which was the captive of another’s toil 320

  Became my prey; and when the deed was done

  I heard among the solitary hills

  Low breathings coming after me, and sounds

  Of undistinguishable motion, steps

  Almost as silent as the turf they trod.

  Nor less, when spring had warmed the cultured Vale,

  Moved we as plunderers where the mother-bird

  Had in high places built her lodge; though mean

  Our object and inglorious, yet the end

  Was not ignoble. Oh! when I have hung 330

  Above the raven’s nest, by knots of grass

  And half-inch fissures in the slippery rock

  But ill sustained, and almost (so it seemed)

  Suspended by the blast that blew amain,

  Shouldering the naked crag, oh, at that time

  While on the perilous ridge I hung alone,

  With what strange utterance did the loud dry wind

  Blow through my ear! the sky seemed not a sky

  Of earth—and with what motion moved the clouds!

  Dust as we are, the immortal spirit grows 340

  Like harmony in music; there is a dark

  Inscrutable workmanship that reconciles

  Discordant elements, makes them cling together

  In one society. How strange, that all

  The terrors, pains, and early miseries,

  Regrets, vexations, lassitudes interfused

 

‹ Prev